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Pick Your Path: Super Mario Bros: Jersey Shore

Evan Hoovler | 19 Jul 2012 17:00
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Grabbing the creature's nose, you stretch it across the sewer. Letting go, the nose becomes a cartilage ram, smashing into the blooper's face. With a whimper, it swims back to the depths of the sewers.

Thrilled, you go check on Luigi. To your slight dismay, he is totally fine except for a bruised ego. Swimming out of the sewers you raise your hands in the air triumphantly.

"My hero!" exclaims Princess Peach, fluttering her eyelashes. You lean in for a kiss, but the rotting stench of filth and feces covering you makes her back away in revulsion.

"Let's a-go!" you scream. Your friends don't need a second cue to pile in the taxi, making sure Luigi sits next to an open window.

- Hop in the cab and ride toward your dream vacation.

- Jump onto the roof of the cab, then onto the roof of a nearby building, for no apparent reason.

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