"So, in essence, teledildonics is just an attempt to reintroduce that physicality back into digital search for love. It tries to act as a sexual liberation of sorts, a fumbling attempt to free our libidos from self-imposed inhibition. Sure, it usually doesn't work. But at least it tries."
Tries. But how hard? I wondered. To answer that question, I sought out information on what's being billed as the most successful - or at least most-widely available - teledildo around: The Sinulator.
Radar Love
The Sinulator is more than a teledildo, it's a teledildonics interface compatible with a number of different toys, including a male masturbation sleeve, which can then be used in tandem with the standard teledildo for true male-female cybersex - or the closest we've come yet. The company even offers connections to popular online dating and "swinger" services, through which you can find and cyber with other Sinulator-owning netizens.
"Here's how it works," reported Regina Lynn, in September of 2004. "Your Sinulator package includes the transmitter, a vibrator and a receiver. You download the client application from Sinulator.com. During installation, you connect the transmitter to a USB port.
"When you're all installed and have the client running, you attach your toy to the wireless receiver and switch it on. Finally, you go to Sinulator.com and choose a name for your toy. After that, anyone who knows your toy's name can set your toy a-buzzin' using the Sinulator control panel. Neither of you has to register or divulge any personal information - not even an e-mail address."
But does it work?
"I'm enjoying the novelty of it," she says. "I can honestly say that the Sinulator beats the pocket rocket hands down."
Wicked Game
Having satisfied the sexual cravings of audiophiles, long-distance lovers and the mildly curious, one then has to wonder what teledildonics will to do for gamers. After all, the success of Rez, its optional vibrator accessory and a host of websites dedicated to perfecting the use of rumble-enabled controllers as sex toys (teaching gamers everywhere how to hit just the right sequence of buttons to maximize in-game vibration) have shown us that there is at least a token demand for game-related sex play. So who's feeding it?
Kyle Machulis, for one.
"I created the SeXBox back in February of 2005," Kyle says. "Which was a joke. Xbox controllers vibrate, vibrators vibrate, put the two together, and ... games become sexual environments, which was lots of silly fun. However, it branched out to be much more than that as I got interested in sex technologies and what was happening with them."
Kyle's original SeXBox was a do-it-yourself project requiring (among other things) a vibrator, an Xbox controller and a soldering iron. His technique has since been refined and expanded upon by others, but he continues to push the envelope, looking for the perfect hybrid of technology and prurience.
"[SeXBox is] an open source sex platform. People should be allowed to [have sex] how they want, even if it is computer-controlled. You shouldn't have to deal with someone else's idea of what's a good UI for your sexual fantasies, nor should you have to worry about paying their monthly fee to use the hardware you bought.
"Outside of that, I've also become interested in the idea of intimate interfaces. Right now, we're still on the UI paradigms PARC gave us in the late '70s. These don't translate well to software made to control sex. Once people can build their own interfaces, it'll be interesting to see what they come up with in order to control what is considered to be one of the most intimate experiences one can have as a human being. Maybe it'll be something we can learn from."
Lara Crigger is not so sure.
"Even if we didn't already have preconceived notions about the propriety of electronic sex toys," she says, "I still think teledildonics would probably never take hold, or even make a noticeable dent, in the gaming industry. For one, it's too much of a novelty act. Even regular, run-of-the-mill sex toys serve only a niche market.
