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'Rassle Dazzle: A Wrestlemania Recap

Bob "MovieBob" Chipman | 7 Apr 2014 16:00
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Main Event: Daniel Bryan vs. Batista vs. Randy Orton Triple-Threat Championship

Ends how everyone knew it would: Bryan wins, The Authority humiliated, the crowd (drooling for the company's blood after Undertaker's defeat) electrified, and the is stage set for some new wrinkle to emerge on Monday's RAW. It's the details that matter, and they're pretty satisfying. Batista and Orton are both interesting performers in that they're both bruisers but also unusually subtle actors in-character. Both are better at selling a moment by glowering at the camera than projecting to the bleachers. Bryan is a pep-rally emcee who can work a submission hold. It's a fun set of contrasts.

The setpiece moment, of course, is an "injured" Bryan ripping his way off of a medical team's stretcher to rush back into the ring and throttle his opponents for the win. And I love old school wrestling nonsense-logic like Triple-H and Stephanie yanking the referee out and shoving an "evil" crooked ref in to replace him. There was even a (brief) reality-break: Orton very clearly sustained an extremely real back injury after being Batista Bombed directly onto a monitor on the announcer's table, but finished the match.

And... that was that. At least, until Monday night on RAW, where we'll presumably find out who gets to become Wrestling fandom's new most favorite person ever for throttling Brock Lesnar. Or will they set him against Kane, who's character is technically still supposed to be The Undertaker's evil, hellfire-powered half-brother? Time will tell as to whether or not this was the mega-push WWE Network needed, but the best they could've hoped for was a memorable show - and they certainly delivered that.

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