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This is your Level 3 spoiler warning. Until the end of this column, there is an increased risk of Uncharted 2 spoilers. Those of you with spoiler aversions are advised to evacuate immediately and report to this week's Unskippable or whatever.

I'll freely admit to having quite an out-sized and vinegary chip on my shoulder when it comes to Uncharted, but this is less the fault of the game and more that of the people who leap to its defense. And since the game is a console exclusive, such people are inevitable, because it will automatically have covering fire from the reserve console tard brigade.

Uncharted 2 gets a pass for its "efficient" gameplay (there's another word for the GameSpot review generator), but the usual tongue that gets swirled around Uncharted 2's copious arsehole is the notion that it has very strong storytelling and characters. That's the point I have contention with.

"[Yahtzee] is right when he says that Uncharted 2 is not very, well, original. But he compares it to FILMS... I don't think he has realised that it is the first game that I have played that actually manages to pull off almost being a film."
-Korolev

As I'm absolutely certain I've said before, a videogame that manages to pull off almost being a film is like a dog that manages to pull off almost being a cat. The interactive nature makes gaming a completely different form of storytelling. But that's a whole other argument. I digress.

I'll concede that Uncharted 2's plot is quite like a film. Specifically, one of those straight-to-video films that come out to capitalize on a recent blockbuster, the kind of thing that might come out after a successful Indiana Jones installment which goes through the same motions but misses the point completely. I guess what I'm saying is that Nathan Drake is far worse of a charismatic hero than Indiana Jones.

"I don't really see how Drake is any worse of a charismatic hero than Indiana Jones..."
-Noelveiga

Well, if you'll stop interrupting me, I'll explain.

Indiana "It Belongs In A Museum" Jones is motivated by the pursuit of academic knowledge. We get to see him in his downtime teaching college students and fending off jailbait, and he often seems quite reluctant to go on adventures. He has a troubled relationship with his dad. Most importantly, he only ever kills Nazis, who are basically the unbuttered popcorn of the villain world - you can have as much as you like and not feel guilty. Indiana Jones is a flawed, conscientious, beaten-down man who pushes himself onward to fight for something bigger than himself.

In Nathan Drake's world, there is nothing bigger than himself. He is motivated (initially, at least) by the desire to gain lots of money for himself, to spend on hair gel and t-shirts. He demonstrates in the tutorial level alone the willingness to break into a museum, pull an innocent security guard off a ledge to his death, steal an exhibit and smash it on the floor looking for clues like an absolute buffoon. I mean, at least wait until it's on your kitchen counter.

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