Dear Love FAQ,
I'm just a simple gamer/geek who gets very few dates. Perhaps because I like the "Fat Princess" more than "The Legend of Zelda," if you catch my drift.
I have come to realize that this is a part of who I am and I cannot change it, no matter how much I want to. It's nice to be like this sometimes, because it opens my eyes to the great women out there who are ignored because they are not considered beautiful (by society's standards). However it's uncomfortable because my friends will ask me if I think some supermodel is hot, and I have to lie through my teeth.
Also, I have met women who are attractive in my eyes, and I want to tell them that they are attractive to help them feel good about themselves, but I'm afraid if I do, they'll think I'm a sick person.
What should I do?
- Fat-Bottomed Girls Make My Rocking World Go Round
It's obvious you have a hang-up about your sexual tastes, but I assure you, there's a difference between fetishizing fat, and simply finding larger ladies more luscious.
The first case is a form of objectification, of removing someone's humanity and supplanting it with your own sexual desire. It's the same as those people who only date Asians because they "have yellow fever", or work in a shoe store just to sniff ladies' feet. The second, however, is just plain biology. And it's nothing to be ashamed of.
So, assuming you're the second kind of guy, my advice is simple: Just own it already.
We all have our likes and dislikes. Some guys like redheads. Others like big girls. So what? Quit feeling so bad about it. Don't apologize to me, your friends, or anyone else. It's nobody's business but yours anyway.
Now, one caveat: Don't assume that big girls are more desperate, or are just sitting around waiting for you to tell them how attractive they are. The stereotype of the lonely larger lady starved for love is just that: a stereotype. Plenty of voluptuous women out there own their bodies and their sexuality, and don't need you or anyone else to tell them how great they are.
But that's beside the point. Next time you see a lovely big girl, tell her how hot you find her. Like most people large and small, she'll probably be flattered by your attention.
Haters gonna hate either way. So find yourself a big girl and start getting it on. Life's too short to feel bad about sex, anyway.
Disclaimer: LoveFAQ is written by Lara Crigger, who is by no means a trained psychiatrist or therapist or even a middle school guidance counselor - just a smart gal who wants to help out her fellow geek. LoveFAQ is meant for entertainment purposes only, so don't take it as a substitute for professional advice. If you have real problems, consult your physician.
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