Love FAQ

Love FAQ
Keep Your Coat On and Your Wallet Closed

Lara Crigger | 21 Oct 2011 16:00
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Dear Love FAQ,

I'm a college student and recently single. I ended it, so I'm not really heartbroken. I still have fun, I hang out with friends, have deep philosophical conversations about the Prime Directive. But one thing I haven't done since I broke off my relationship is have sex. Which I really, really miss. Like, a lot.

I'd love to find the geek girl of my dreams, but I have college, a part time job, and an indie game team I'm trying to contribute on so I don't have time to dedicate to a serious relationship, nor the energy to deal with the potential drama. Just a reliable source of orgasm-exchange is all I'm pining for.

I'm not really an Adonis; I have horrid acne, and it's worse when naked. So I don't think I'm likely to meet the standards of the kind of women who'd be down with some no-strings-boning, and are also STD free like myself. My ex was but she was emotionally attached. Circumstance seems to be putting my goal, the way I wish it, out of my reach.

So I guess my question is what would be the best way to form a fuck-buddy arrangement, or am I doomed to go wanting until I find the time to commit?

Signed,
ISO Isabela

I can't believe I even have to tell a college student this, but masturbate. Frequently.

In my experience, fuck buddies aren't cultivated so much as found, and usually then only when you aren't looking. Appearance rarely matters, but desperation certainly never aided the search.

If you're brave enough, you could trawl Craigslist or online dating services for others like you looking for no-strings flings. But frankly, I think you're better off saving yourself the heartburn and just forgetting about the fuck buddy. It's too much effort for a connection you wouldn't have the spare time to cultivate anyway, and there's far too much risk of feelings getting involved, especially since you're on the rebound. When you're this fresh out of a relationship, it's not the worst thing in the world to be alone and horny for awhile.

Keep your eyes peeled, of course, but for now, you're probably better off just keeping it clean and contenting yourself five-fingered Rosie until your life slows down.

Disclaimer: LoveFAQ is written by Lara Crigger, who is by no means a trained psychiatrist or therapist or even a middle school guidance counselor - just a smart gal who wants to help out her fellow geek. LoveFAQ is meant for entertainment purposes only, so don't take it as a substitute for professional advice. If you have real problems, consult your physician.

Got a burning question (or a question about burning) for LoveFAQ? Send your emails to advice@escapistmag.com. All submissions are confidential and anonymous.

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