Shamus Plays

Shamus Plays: LOTRO, Part 15

Shamus Young | 28 Apr 2010 09:00
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I spent most of yesterday in the reeking swamp of Frogmorton. I did a couple of jobs there but was driven away by the smell and lack of work. After that I continued my general eastward push and found myself a spot by the river where I proceeded to spend the next several hours washing myself, my clothes, and my pie collection. I don't know that I've actually gotten the stench out, but it's at least mild enough that I'm willing to start breathing on a regular basis again.

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The underwear is really odd in this game. Being set in the super-tame Tolkien universe, they couldn't very well put the guys in boxers and the ladies in thongs like they do in most fantasy games. So the underwear is actually really elaborate and colorful and not at all revealing. You'll have to play the game yourself if you want to see it, though. I'll bet I'm not the only person to strips down in fantasy games just to see how they handled the undergarments.

Once clean, I march eastward some more and find myself in the town of Budgeford, which should be named "Why the Hell Don't We Build a Bridge"-ville.

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The river is a bit annoying here. It's mostly ankle or knee deep, but there are a couple of "soft spots" where it jumps to shoulder height for Hobbits. That's an insta-fail gotcha if you're delivering mail or pies. Best to hop over the water even if it looks shallow.

And the river? This river is actually named "The Water." Hobbits have such interesting names for everything else. I think Tolkien was a brilliant world builder, but that one kind of annoys me. Dude! Deepwater? Slowwater? Briskwater? No? Just "Water"? Okay, then. Be that way. But if your book ever gets turned into a movie I'm totally going to make fun of it.

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