Shamus Plays

Shamus Plays: Champions Online, Part 5

Shamus Young | 11 Aug 2010 14:00
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If you remember from last time, I'm here to rescue survivors from this crash.

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My job is to free people from debris. If you can survive a plane crash, end up trapped by massive bits of former airplane, and sit in the snow for hours on end while being menaced by ice demons, then you are obviously a superhero. I shouldn't be rescuing them, I should be helping them design costumes for themselves. (My advice: You can't go wrong with some sort of star-based iconography.)

What's interesting about this quest is that the goal isn't what the quest log says it is. The quest log says to free people from the airplane debris. But if I lift up a chunk of plane and the person trapped underneath runs off, I don't actually get credit for freeing them until I destroy the debris I'm holding. So the real goal of the quest is to destroy debris. You can, in fact, hurl objects at a bit of passenger-trapping debris until it's destroyed and then dash off, leaving the passenger alone and injured in the frozen wastes and surrounded by ice demons. Doesn't matter. As long as they aren't pinned, my job is done.

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Ah! There is my goal! A piece of debris to destroy. I only get credit for ones on top of survivors, though.

As I fly around, bashing debris and pummeling ice demons, I occasionally pass civilians who are injured and helpless in the snow. Guys like this one:

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He makes eye contact. Oh geeze.

Look, I'm sorry buddy. I just can't help you. Well, I mean... I could. There's a gurney right over there. You'd be way better off if you were on that thing. And some medical gear. You'd have a much better chance if I could hand you that. And a box of supplies. Man, there could even be a blanket in there. Heck, it would be effortless for me to shuttle you back to base. I could do that with one hand, actually. But Cryptic entertainment didn't put any buttons on the interface for doing any of those things. If you're not trapped under debris or attacked by ice demons, I can't help you.

What do I suggest? I don't know. Maybe yell a bit? The demons are bound to notice you sooner or later.

Would it be okay if I covered you with snow? No offense, but watching you die is really making me feel like less of a superhero.

If it helps at all, I guess you should know that THIS IS NO ORDINARY STORM!

Really Cryptic... Are you familiar with the concept behind superheroes? Why would you plonk down people and deny us the ability to help them, when their need is so dire and so easily fulfilled? You wouldn't even need superpowers to save this guy's life. You'd need hands.

I fulfill my debris-smashing quota, as well as my demon-suckerpunching quota. Now back to base.

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