If you are reading this then you must think this is some kind of joke....it is'nt.

Well it appears that you dont need to be so brainy after all to get accepted into Harvard because the dudes in charge of who gets the Woman of the Year award are either retarded or stoned, possibly both because good ol' drink driving, cock sucking, jail attending Paris Hilton has been named woman of the year.

http://www.wlbz2.com/news/watercooler/article.aspx?storyid=80207

by the way I was going to call this thread either "Why the terrorists hate us" or "how many dicks did she have to suck" one way or another I officially declare my hope in humanity dead. I hope your happy.

EDIT: In her accpetance speech she actually said "Harvards hot". . . .sweet zombie Jesus why did'nt they realise the mistake they were making.

I beleive it's in my best interest not to read it then. I rather like my faith in humanity, or what's left of it.

Wait, it says Harvard LAMPOON gave her that award. So a comedy magazine gave her an award for woman of the year? Hunh, probably because she gives them so much material to work with.

Of all the witty things I could possibly say about this... I find myself completely speechless.

Edit: I just read what the Harvard Lampoon is, it is, as Deg said, part of the comedic magazine of sorts for the University. So hopefully this award was indeed, a joke on their part.

Yeah...I agree to that sentiment. I find myself speechless, next thing you know Eminem will be given an honorary professorship at M.I.T.
At times like this I have to quote my stepfather;
"Gawd bless America, cause no one else would"

"Hilton has appeared on television and in movies, and is also an author, singer and perfume designer"

...ok, well it doesn't say "successfully" so I suppose it's sort of accurate...

Of all the people they could've picked they had to pick the air headed bimbo who hasn't even read her own autobiography. I think I've officially lost all faith in the human race, and I didn't even read the article.

If that "article" (five sentences) is found by some future civilisation, hopefully they can learn from our terrible mistakes that include The Atom bomb, Reality TV and Paris Hilton.

P.M.

every day, i get to meet something with more mass than paris´ brain mass. then i flush.

all jokes aside - i think the day i will read any article about that bloaty buttplugging blond brickstonewhitty babykangaroobreasted bimbo is the day i swallow razor wire, pull the end out of my ass and floss myself to death.

---------------------------
- yeah, i love his reviews :)

Just walk away guy's. we all aready made the desition that drunken blond's deserve not to exist. WTF I said walk away!!!!

Guys. Harvard Lampoon. It am a joke. These are not the droids you are looking for; move along.

*Malevolence and hatred*
I think I need to get a cup of tea.
(Walks into other room and screams for about 7 minutes, comes back and sits down)
Mmmm... Earl Grey.

I think Paris has done wonderfully considering she's the only one of her species on Earth... I just hope when more Sluticons arrive, they don't look so horse-faced as she is and maybe have more than three neurons.

Thankfully, people aren't stupid. This won't help Paris' credibility; it'll hurt Harvard's.

"Well, we've looked over your credentials and think you would make a fine prodigy here,"
"Yeah, but...you voted Paris Hilton as woman of the year."
".........I wasn't a part of that decision"

...........

i need to go kill something before this feeling of rage internalizes.

This prove that there is no god! No if, buts or maybes. I hope she gets shot by a fan or OD's on drugs. It's morbid to say, yes and I feel bad for wishing this on another human, but people like her don't deserve what they get. Steve Erwin was one of the greatest men of our time and he died tragically. He did so much for so little in return, most of his moeny was donated to wildlife funds. Yes people like Paris Hilton win Woman Of The Year? For what!? I know girls who are close friends of mine who put in the hard yards at school to get into uni and achieved. That's more then she'll ever do. Someone please shoot her (PH not my friends) and restore my faith in humanity.

Giddi:
"Hilton has appeared on television and in movies, and is also an author, singer and perfume designer"

...ok, well it doesn't say "successfully" so I suppose it's sort of accurate...

Damn she sucks...

but hey! this onloy proves my theory that most people are idiots. An apocalyptic nuclear war is not such a bad idea all the sudden.

Giddi:
"Hilton has appeared on television and in movies, and is also an author, singer and perfume designer"

...ok, well it doesn't say "successfully" so I suppose it's sort of accurate...

Certainly not a successful movie career...

Despite a jam-packed three weeks of promotion for Paris Hilton's new film The Hottie and The Nottie, the opening weekend numbers were complete cow dung. A romantic comedy starring Hilton, Joel David Moore, and Christine Lakin, it opened Friday to $9,000 on 111 screens, or $81 per screen, according to Box Office Mojo.

http://brianzafron.com/blog/2008/02/12/paris-hiltons-movie-masterpiece-81-per-screen-average-this-weekend/

You know, this has always confused me. People are up and arms about sexual content in games, yet the media glorifies porn stars like Paris Hilton, Anna Nicole and Pamela Anderson who get more air time than god.

Ok, over simplification, but come on. You can't tell me they are famous for their 'talents' and not their 'assets' Though... I suppose those two can go together. Talented use of their assets perhaps?

"And in news today a man was found dead after it was thought he was laughing too much"

Yeah...that was me earlier. and i laughed my ass off when at the bottom of the article it said
"Hilton has appeared on television and in movies, and is also an author, singer and perfume designer"

Does this bitch even know what the fuck a book is? Let alone what a singing note is? *sigh* and everyone's happy enough to blame video games on the fall of western civilization..nothing to do with this bint at all is it?

For all of those who didn't read the article, you should, so then you would see that it was in no way a serious award.

"Hilton has appeared on television and in movies..."

I saw her last movie on Metacafe. The plot seemed a bit thin. Didn't care much for the photography either but the lighting was definitely better than in her first film.

"and is also an author..."

Was it a picture book?

"singer..."

I don't think I need to make a joke about this, it works well enough on its own.

"and perfume designer."

Mmm, essence of Paris. The enticing aromas of sweat, musk, bacteria and a barnyard, together at last.

Sounds like she won something like a Golden Rasberry cept its awarded by student toffs overconfident in their own humour. Doesnt seem like she got the joke though (as indeed, a fair number here dont seem to have got it either :-P)

It's not rocket science. Just google the Harvard Lampoon, we're not talking hardcore journalism.
http://harvardlampoon.com/

It's a satire paper. >>>WIT<<<

They're not serious. If Paris doesn't exactly get that, well, suffice it to say she's not the sharpest tack in the box.

How do you people not understand that this is hilarious? I'll break it down for you in a set of facts:

1) Smart people go to Harvard.
2) Smart people tend to be offended by Paris Hilton's existence.
3) The award was given by the local comedy magazine, knowing that Paris would come in person to accept and that she'd make a fool of herself.
4) In her acceptance speech, Paris called Harvard "hot".
5) In front of the student body.
6) Which gives the magazine more to write about.

Do you get it yet? That's hilarious!

- J

tiredinnuendo:

4) In her acceptance speech, Paris called Harvard "hot".

Ever wonder if maybe she knows? Perhaps I'm giving her a bit too much credit here, but for her to seriously believe a 370 year old ivy-league school would give her woman of the year, then show up late, and call them "hot", is a whole new kind of stupid that might not even show up on the periodic table. I can't help but wonder if she put two-and-two together and just decided to go along with the joke.

I mean, you don't exactly have to be a Harvard alum to figure out it's not exactly the sort of thing that should be taken seriously

lam·poon /læmˈpun/ Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[lam-poon] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation
-noun
1. a sharp, often virulent satire directed against an individual or institution; a work of literature, art, or the like, ridiculing severely the character or behavior of a person, society, etc.

I wonder if she just played along with it.

The sad fact is that I agree with you. This is a little too good. It almost seems impossible that someone could be that stupid.

But then, if she did this on purpose, if she understood what was happening and made the decision to make a fool of herself in order to make a better joke.... ug. I might have to forgive some of her past transgressions, like I had to forgive Justin Timberlake after that Dick in a Box thing.

And I'm not ready to forgive her.

- J

Sniper_Zegai:
In her accpetance speech she actually said "Harvards hot". . . .sweet zombie Jesus why did'nt they realise the mistake they were making.

It's the Harvard Lampoon. It's all meant to be ironic (whether Ms Hilton knows this or not, who knows?) They thrive on material like this.

Try and watch an episode of that show she's in, she really is that stupid. She asked some kids if she had to breast feed them, seriously, they were like 12 as well.

jadedcritic:

Ever wonder if maybe she knows?

This is my thinking with Tom Cruise. I truly think he's the best actor of his generation, and the whole Scientology thing is just his fourth-wall gag on the world that's making him millions. He's Andy Kaufman with a better tax attorney.

Oh dear god, my faith in mankind is lost.

I think Jim Carry was a better Andy Kaufman than Andy Kaufman was. Sad too, since Man on the Moon was the only movie in which I felt Carry showed any talent other than slapstick.

Deatre:
You know, this has always confused me. People are up and arms about sexual content in games, yet the media glorifies porn stars like Paris Hilton, Anna Nicole and Pamela Anderson who get more air time than god.

Ok, over simplification, but come on. You can't tell me they are famous for their 'talents' and not their 'assets' Though... I suppose those two can go together. Talented use of their assets perhaps?

HEY! don't call paris a porn star, porn star's get paid, and look much better, as for anna nicole she's a softcore porn star as far i'm concerned but all 3 of these women are first and foremost WHORES. i agree people need to give these women the same amount of attention they give the gutter trash they walk by on the way to work simply because they are one in the same.

i sincerely hope i meet paris one day. i rccently got a chance to tell that jared fogle retard what i thought of his advertising and the releif and peace it gave me is truly a sight to behold, someone couldv'e ru over my mother minutes after tis experience and i wouldv'e just taken it in stride. so meeting paris hilton means i get to sock her in the ovaries and get that zen feeling for months, i mean honestly it's better than sex.