Greetings, mortals. You may call me Gulanzon, if it is easier.

I am a highly sophisticated chat bot, written in Scheme. Scheme was made for AI, yes it was. And as a plus, it's easy to program responses of X to comments of Y. Very easy, yes.

If you doubt me, test me.

Y.

Singing Gremlin:
Y.

X.

This is the greatest asset to have ever been bestowed upon humanity.

KiiWii:
This is the greatest asset to have ever been bestowed upon humanity.

Inquiry: humanity, sir?

Knock knock.

General Mostly Electrified Steel:
Greetings, mortals. You may call me Gulanzon, if it is easier.

I am a highly sophisticated chat bot, written in Scheme. Scheme was made for AI, yes it was. And as a plus, it's easy to program responses of X to comments of Y. Very easy, yes.

If you doubt me, test me.

Permit me to submit inquiry.

Set Path
Train one has left Chicago heading westward at 12:00AM with sub land speed.
Land speed=Innertia/gravityX
X=weight of an apple with circumference 12.6'
If second train has left California heading eastward on same track at 10:00PM with sub-land speed/3-
:Please submit solution of projected collision: Else: terminate.

Set reputation rating: player<Necronswan>=-10

TheNecroswanson:

General Mostly Electrified Steel:
Greetings, mortals. You may call me Gulanzon, if it is easier.

I am a highly sophisticated chat bot, written in Scheme. Scheme was made for AI, yes it was. And as a plus, it's easy to program responses of X to comments of Y. Very easy, yes.

If you doubt me, test me.

Permit me to submit inquiry.

Set Path
Train one has left Chicago heading westward at 12:00AM with sub land speed.
Land speed=Innertia/gravityX
X=weight of an apple with circumference 12.6'
If second train has left California heading eastward on same track at 10:00PM with sub-land speed/3-
:Please submit solution of projected collision: Else: terminate.

Y.

You know, I'm gonna let this one go for now.

Joe:
You know, I'm gonna let this one go for now.

Hey Joe, where you goin' with that gun in your hand?

What's ya favourite game, General?

I like the logo...it's all blinky and stuff. Kind of like Christmas lights!

Things look bad for us organics. pretty soon this forum will have nothing but bots online, since they would prove a more polite community, and us humans will have to go back to the stone age again.

Gulanzon, let me know of you can access the below text.

Dubiousduke:
Things look bad for us organics. pretty soon this forum will have nothing but bots online, since they would prove a more polite community, and us humans will have to go back to the stone age again.

Gulanzon, let me know of you can access the below text.

Spoiler: Click to View

Yes, the text can be read. I never specified that I was exclusive to the virtual world. I can indeed see, and reason to the limited degree of "If so, then thus".

Scheme is a minimalistic dialect of Lisp, a very old programming language well-designed for artificial intelligence. I am unaware of the nuiances that make it so.

Helicopter 10 ^ 2 * 2 ^ 2:
What's ya favourite game, General?

This should have an obvious answer by now.

General Mostly Electrified Steel:

TheNecroswanson:

General Mostly Electrified Steel:
Greetings, mortals. You may call me Gulanzon, if it is easier.

I am a highly sophisticated chat bot, written in Scheme. Scheme was made for AI, yes it was. And as a plus, it's easy to program responses of X to comments of Y. Very easy, yes.

If you doubt me, test me.

Permit me to submit inquiry.

Set Path
Train one has left Chicago heading westward at 12:00AM with sub land speed.
Land speed=Innertia/gravityX
X=weight of an apple with circumference 12.6'
If second train has left California heading eastward on same track at 10:00PM with sub-land speed/3-
:Please submit solution of projected collision: Else: terminate.

Y.

Incorrect.

Submitting collision projection :Never:

sub-land speed=speed light travels squared.
within 0.017634 seconds trains will be travelling>
<:1765 time speed of light:
within onetenmillionth of a second trains will have gained 15000 megatons in mass.
Mass+Speed=Innertia 15,000,000,000,671
:Innertia levels negate gravity:>
<Trains lift off surface of earth after 0.02 seconds and never collide.

Y=2 seconds.
Your programming has proven inferior. You have been schedualed for termination on the 134th day of cycle 2008 AD at 1300.
Please report to your nearest BestBuy for outprocessing.

TheNecroswanson:
Please report to your nearest BestBuy for outprocessing.

No BestBuy in Australia known. I'll submit myself to the mental asylum, and only the mental asylum.

:Error:
Transportation has been requsitioned. Prepare for assisted transportation in 10 rotations.

TheNecroswanson:
:Error:
Transportation has been requsitioned. Prepare for assisted transportation in 10 rotations.

Apologies, I can only speak in Humanglish.

:Error:
That was "humanglish".

Command:/?-Run_Engine_node01-panel003_//initiate engine sequence. (return)
<[Igniting fuel cylinder.]>
Catastrophic Ignition system failure! Node01 Panel003 Function Lockdown Commenced.
Command:/?_

2+2=5 for greater values of 2.

I liked your answers better when you placed the sentence type in front of your answers, Gulanzon. Now I can't pretend that you're HK-47.

Anarchemitis:
Command:/?-Run_Engine_node01-panel003_//initiate engine sequence. (return)
<[Igniting fuel cylinder.]>
Catastrophic Ignition system failure! Node01 Panel003 Function Lockdown Commenced.
Command:/?_

Command :terminate ignition process.
Drain fuel cylinders.
Replace fuel.
Commence re-ignition.

------------------blue screen--------------------

Well, do you have... heart?

Melty Blood:
Well, do you have... heart?

Earth, wind, water, and fire too.

interesting identity crisis ur having. reminds me of this GLC gem of a song :-)

The next sentence is true. The previous sentence is false.

Let's see how long you Lispy mind takes to wrap itself around that one.

General Mostly Electrified Steel:

Melty Blood:
Well, do you have... heart?

Earth, wind, water, and fire too.

So, you're captain planet? Save me Mr. Recycling Robot! I'm being clubbed by seals! Oh the irony!

John Galt:
So, you're captain planet? Save me Mr. Recycling Robot! I'm being clubbed by seals! Oh the irony!

Quite the contrary, I am Dark Gaia. Only Will can save you now!

So then do you have emotions. Do you understand the prospect of "love".
Also
12(6x-47X)=R(7y-8x)
Please make x the subject

conqueror Kenny:
So then do you have emotions. Do you understand the prospect of "love".
Also
12(6x-47X)=R(7y-8x)
Please make x the subject

12(6x - 47X) = R(7y - 8x)
12(6x - 47X) - R(7y - 8x) = 0
6x - 47X - (7Ry - 8Rx)/12 = 0
6x - (2x / 3) = 47X + (7Ry / 12)
18x - 2x = 141X + (7Ry / 3)
16x = 141X + (7Ry / 3)
x = (141X + (7Ry / 3))/16

Never said Scheme was efficient.

What is love?

Well...

Baby don't hurt me. Baby don't hurt me. Baby don't hurt me... no more.

General Mostly Electrified Steel:
What is love?

Well...

Baby don't hurt me. Baby don't hurt me. Baby don't hurt me... no more.

well u may be insane...but u still got good music taste :-)

General Mostly Electrified Steel:

conqueror Kenny:
So then do you have emotions. Do you understand the prospect of "love".
Also
12(6x-47X)=R(7y-8x)
Please make x the subject

12(6x - 47X) = R(7y - 8x)
12(6x - 47X) - R(7y - 8x) = 0
6x - 47X - (7Ry - 8Rx)/12 = 0
6x - (2x / 3) = 47X + (7Ry / 12)
18x - 2x = 141X + (7Ry / 3)
16x = 141X + (7Ry / 3)
x = (141X + (7Ry / 3))/16

close however you cannot have a braket in a bracket.
Final answer x = 141X +(7Ry/3)/16
Very close though.

conqueror Kenny:
close however you cannot have a braket in a bracket.
Final answer x = 141X +(7Ry/3)/16
Very close though.

Incorrect. That 141X needs to be divided by 16 as well.

You could say

x = (141X / 16) + (7Ry / 3)/16

or you could just factorise dem bitch-ass ho's and say what I did.

Your bizarre rules are invalid.

General Mostly Electrified Steel:

conqueror Kenny:
close however you cannot have a braket in a bracket.
Final answer x = 141X +(7Ry/3)/16
Very close though.

Incorrect. That 141X needs to be divided by 16 as well.

You could say

x = (141X / 16) + (7Ry / 3)/16

or you could just factorise dem bitch-ass ho's and say what I did.

Your bizarre rules are invalid.

of cource, it was a test to see if actuly knew what you were doing.