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Write your own epitath

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paperninja
Anonymous Source
Posts: 1
Joined: 9 Apr 2008

"Not Again..."

or

"Can i get a rez plz?"

Edit: Wait. Maybe both. :)

John Galt
Gone Gonzo
Posts: 1618
Joined: 29 Dec 2007

"Somebody set up us the bomb."

or

"Playin' poker with Hitler in the hereafter."

Singing Gremlin
Gone Gonzo
Posts: 1057
Joined: 16 Jan 2008

"Didn't get very far in life, but had fun not doing so."

GenHellspawn
Gone Gonzo
Posts: 1065
Joined: 1 Jan 2008

"See? This is what happens when you ask too many questions!"

Akirasfriend
Copy Clerk
Posts: 72
Joined: 6 Jan 2008

Joe:
Here lies Joe Blancato ... and why not?

(Free get-out-of-a-one-day-ban-free card to the first person to PM me what I'm referencing.)

PM'd.

Duck Sandwich
Infamous Scribbler
Posts: 556
Joined: 13 Dec 2007

"He is not here. He hid himself to repair himself."

"Don't you have better things to do than reading the epitaphs of random schmucks?"

"My epitaph is cooler than yours."

"I'll be seeing you REAL soon."

"April Fools Day!"

"Well this sucks."

xMacx
Muckraker
Posts: 233
Joined: 24 Nov 2007

Akirasfriend:

Joe:
Here lies Joe Blancato ... and why not?

(Free get-out-of-a-one-day-ban-free card to the first person to PM me what I'm referencing.)

PM'd.

Also, just in case.

Voodoo Child
Beat Writer
Posts: 181
Joined: 13 Dec 2007

"I've got to be direct. If I'm wrong, please correct. You're standing on my neck."

Sorry.

"My milkshakes brought killer bees to the yard."

needsmosleep
Copy Clerk
Posts: 56
Joined: 22 Mar 2008

"So I guess that part wasnt optional"

The Sorrow
Pulitzer Laureate
Posts: 903
Joined: 27 Jan 2008

"Don't mess with sodium."

Abbadiel
Copy Clerk
Posts: 53
Joined: 15 Oct 2007

"Incredibly Horny Right Now"

The Franco
Beat Writer
Posts: 155
Joined: 25 Mar 2008

In the few moments of contemplation I had, I came up with a few of these:

"Wait, you're reading this?"

"Come down and see me some time"

"You wont believe how cramped it is in here"

"Wish one of you fuckers would have warned me about that truck"

"Hopes to beat Samuel Taylor Coleridge at Scrabble someday"

"Bad thing about that trick, I can only do it once"

"Fuck you Blizzard, I'm free now!"

"So maybe I can't fly..."

"He lived, he loved, he was a nerd."

JC123
Copy Clerk
Posts: 67
Joined: 10 Apr 2008

The worst one I've ever thought of...

"Delete my porn."

stompy
Gone Gonzo
Posts: 2913
Joined: 21 Jan 2008

"If you're here, at least I wasn't forgotten..."

Fire Daemon
Gone Gonzo
Posts: 2658
Joined: 18 Dec 2007

Don't worry guys, I'll respawn soon.

But seeing as how I plan to be stuffed, mounted and placed in a Mac Donalds I don't think words are needed.

The_Logician19
Gone Gonzo
Posts: 1124
Joined: 7 Mar 2008

"Ha, ha!

The last laugh.

I apologies to anyone who enjoys Non-sequir.

Hey Joe
Gone Gonzo
Posts: 1387
Joined: 23 Dec 2007

"Don't drink ethanol"

or

"Dancin' it up with Zombie Jesus!"

AngryMan
Muckraker
Posts: 238
Joined: 26 Mar 2008

Doctor Shenanigans:
"Beloved Father, 1988-2018

Beloved Mother, 2018-2024

Beloved Father Again, 2024-2050"

/win

urprobablyright
Infamous Scribbler
Posts: 584
Joined: 10 Apr 2008

"He will come again in glory to judge the living and the noobs"

"tell the creepy guy in the background that i've decided I'm willing to experiment"

"Hammer time is ended."

"I went there. Oh yes. I went there."
*carving of a large penis*

PurpleRain
Gone Gonzo
Posts: 4207
Joined: 2 Dec 2007

JC123:
The worst one I've ever thought of...

"Delete my porn."

I'd actually like that more if it said "Don't delete my porn!"

Anywho:

"Here lies Purple Rain. If not, please contact the undertaker."
"Purple Rain. Couldn't dodge a bullet after all."
"Don't turn around..."
"Go read a book!"
"You're dead to me!"

Meliz
Paperboy
Posts: 49
Joined: 9 Apr 2008

me: "oh my god an epitah contest! Quick! I need something moving i can put on my headstone!"
my brother, deadpan: "... a slug?"

Yan-Yan
Muckraker
Posts: 256
Joined: 13 Jan 2008

"I don't have to be warm, just gotta be stiff"

"Rigor Mortis: The Anti-ED"

"Just because I'm stone cold, doesn't mean I'm not hot in the sack"

"If you're wondering what happens in the next life: I know"

"First one to bring me back finds out where I buried my belongings"

EDIT:

And probably various inappropriate pictures using the E-Crypt tool, who's price should drop about the time I do.

propertyofcobra
Press Junketeer
Posts: 429
Joined: 17 Oct 2007

"I used to say,
"When my life is happy I work and smile and think,
When times are full of worry I frown and cry and drink",
Now when my life is over, my times have come to pass,
I have been buried upside down, so the world may kiss my ass!" (Yeah, it's old and I butchered it. So what, you gonna sue?)

"Here lies PropertyofCobra. Born 1988, Died 20XX, Risen again right behind you"

"Hey, pastor, you were wrong! This isn't heaven! It's cold and maggots are eating me!"

"Please don't touch the lightning rod. I need it to rise to my unholy semblance of life"

"Put your ear to the ground, you can still feel my heart beating"

And my favorite

"OH GOD GET ME OUT! CALL THE UNDERTAKER! I AM TRAPPED!"

moretimethansense
Anonymous Source
Posts: 9
Joined: 10 Apr 2008

"I left this world the same way I came in to it: naked screaming and covered in blood!"

Jeroen Stout
Copy Clerk
Posts: 82
Joined: 1 Aug 2006

"Ask me about worms!"

Melaisis
Gone Gonzo
Posts: 1203
Joined: 9 Dec 2007

"CBA corpse run. Waiting for ress."

thebobmaster
Gone Gonzo
Posts: 6902
Joined: 28 Nov 2007

"It's quite cozy in here. You'd like it."

Hey Joe
Gone Gonzo
Posts: 1387
Joined: 23 Dec 2007

"I'M NOT DEAD!"

Soulfein
Copy Clerk
Posts: 94
Joined: 20 Dec 2007

"He tried"

Easykill
Gone Gonzo
Posts: 1718
Joined: 13 Sep 2007

Fable actually had some alright ones.

But in all seriousness, screw the epitaph, I just want a life sized statue of me with a controller in my hands. Or some sort of statue. No words.

Copter400
Gone Gonzo
Posts: 2052
Joined: 14 Sep 2007

"Angus Lee, fair and tall, he'll come back and kill you all."

Followed, of course, with a picture of a zombie.

GenHellspawn
Gone Gonzo
Posts: 1065
Joined: 1 Jan 2008

"NEDM, man. NEDM"

redstar alpha
Beat Writer
Posts: 196
Joined: 9 Dec 2007

fergus was killed by(what ever my cause of death will be)
respawn in(have ten removable plates that get chandged over each day until it reaches zero when i will burst from the ground and prove to all the ladys why necropheliya is not all that bad)

Deadbear
Paperboy
Posts: 14
Joined: 17 Mar 2008

"Wow, it sure is dark in here"

Sylocat
Infamous Scribbler
Posts: 596
Joined: 13 Nov 2007

I think I'd like to have a tombstone that read, "Jimmy Hoffa."

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