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BlazeTheVampire
Press Junketeer
Posts: 459
Joined: 14 May 2008

Ultrajoe:

Lord Krunk:
Please, can we keep this thread serious? I mean, serious enough to avoid stupid questions.

And another "relatively serious" question:

How do guys prepare for "That time of the month"? I mean, do we hide in a nuclear bunker or something until the storm is over?

not a girl, but i myself have a strategy.

Know the warning signs, know the phrases that signal the meltdown, and then go into un-you mode

Un-you mode:

1) The girl wants a target, start conversations about her current arch-nemesis and then just nod and smile
2) Silence is golden
3) Do not question even the most stupid of opinions, nod and smile... nod and smile...
4) Coffee is your friend, fill her with it.
5) Never offer help if they are struggling, only if they are coping fine (or else you are patronizing, and thus the new target of their frustration)
6) don't grope boobs
7) If they start to cry for any reason SHUT YOUR FUCKING MOUTH, DO. NOT. SPEAK. NO. MATTER. WHAT... they will speak to you when they are good and ready, its not insensitive, just sit near them and for the love of god do not speak unless spoken to, and never forget rule 3 at this point.

Girls may find me offensive in my methods and mindset, but this is the solution that you ladies cause us to adopt, do not blame us, for hell hath no fury like a woman's scorn, Let alone her PMS.

And as far as that whole discussion goes... just pretend nothing out of the ordinary is going on whatsoever, because half of the time it's true. Not every girl goes into super-bitch mode once a month. With all of the birth control and stuff out there that controls hormones and therefore kills mood swings, girls only get upset because their boyfriend's treating them like a bomb about to go off.

Timorous Meowth
Anonymous Source
Posts: 4
Joined: 15 May 2008

TonyOfPlimith:
Timorous Meowth is alluding to something... maybe that he's rich famous and as you American's would say "loaded". So here's a plan of action I purpose for Timorous... (if in fact he's rich, etc etc). Date my sister... go on do it! We're only half a world apart but I'm sure you two can make it work...

Unfortunately, no.

I'm not an attractive guy by any stretch of the imagination, so I was just wondering how rich I would have to become to be desirable.

Windows David
Paperboy
Posts: 13
Joined: 26 Mar 2008

i have a question: why do girls from the first day think your retarded

DjDemonAsh
Anonymous Source
Posts: 5
Joined: 2 Apr 2008

I got a very serious question here. something I'm not proud of.
My current other half enjoys my company, but, her best friend, enjoys my company ALOT more.
And to be completely honest, I enjoy her company more than my other halve's company.
After all, My other half does nothing but slap me for any joke I make, perverted, or not perverted.
Her friend though, Is one of my good friends other half.. What Do I do, I don't want to hurt either my other half, or my friend.. But, I want to be with this girl.

Blayze
Infamous Scribbler
Posts: 672
Joined: 19 Dec 2007

My other half does nothing but slap me for any joke I make, perverted, or not perverted.

If that's true, then get a better relationship. Seriously.

I'm not an attractive guy by any stretch of the imagination, so I was just wondering how rich I would have to become to be desirable.

I tried working out a formula for this once, but that plan came to a halt when I realised just how many constant fluctuations there would be in the damn thing.

Gahars
Muckraker
Posts: 307
Joined: 4 Feb 2008

Do moobs disgust you as much as they disgust guys?

CatAttack
Paperboy
Posts: 26
Joined: 15 May 2008

the truth is everyone is different and so you cant make a guide on how to talk to girls or anything like that... it s a cliche but be yourself and with any luck you will get on, just relax! we are not going to bite your head off!

DjDemonAsh
Anonymous Source
Posts: 5
Joined: 2 Apr 2008

Timorous Meowth:
I was just wondering how rich I would have to become to be desirable.

Think, marilyn manson rich. Or, micheal schumacher rich. Then your definately in.

Blayze:
If that's true, then get a better relationship. Seriously.

If I could. I would.

NezumiiroKitsune
Paperboy
Posts: 48
Joined: 29 Mar 2008

Timorous Meowth:

TonyOfPlimith:
Timorous Meowth is alluding to something... maybe that he's rich famous and as you American's would say "loaded". So here's a plan of action I purpose for Timorous... (if in fact he's rich, etc etc). Date my sister... go on do it! We're only half a world apart but I'm sure you two can make it work...

Unfortunately, no.

I'm not an attractive guy by any stretch of the imagination, so I was just wondering how rich I would have to become to be desirable.

Shuddup, and try harder. Money doesnt make a good relationship, it just gets you a whore that wants you dead. You just try your damned hardest, and if looks really arnt on your side it shouldnt matter if your a decent person. Okay big breasted blonde girls who can get a guy by shaking there ass wont ever screw you, but if thats all your looking for you dont deserve to be with someone. IF your looking for someone who you actually have a bond with, who you can share private jokes, talk for hours about everything and not feel gay, and generally be happy to just hold them everyday and feel lost wkthout them, you dont need looks. You need a miracle. Humans mess things up for themselves, and unless your a selfless loving intelleigent witty and damned logical guy your probably gpoing to mess up too. You'll know its finally the right person when you mess up and they forgive you and you'll help each other get through it and become stronger for it. I'm not an attractive person, I'm really not, I'm not ugly to the point of deformality but definatly not attractive, and being the in the GG (Goon Gang) the biggest troupe of geeks and nerds this side of Yorkshire doesnt help my social standing either. Reagardless of that I now have Ellen, or should I say, she has me. I wouldnt give that up for anything (apart from Jesus, but come on... its Jesus). I can honestly say I love her, and that I trust her when she says she loves me. I know, that we will get through the hardships we will face and come out of it more in love than the first time we kissed.

You'll find someone. If your looking, posting here doesnt count as actively being social and inviting.

(Just to point out I never use gay in a derogatory sense, I would be insulting one of my clostest friends, I meant you would probably feel pretty girly and a bit uncomrtable talking about your feelings with your mates. Okay a good mate will listen if your really down, but rarely will there response be full of the love and warmth you'd find in a romantic relationship. If you do... well you might be looking in the wrong place mate.)

Tizer
Anonymous Source
Posts: 1
Joined: 15 May 2008

-Why do women think that they are superior to men. (Sorry I had to ask)
-What is with you and Harry Potter you're obsessed with it?
-Why do you always think you're sooo funny?

RoundhouseR
Paperboy
Posts: 17
Joined: 14 Feb 2008

Perwer:
Question :

I have a friend, and she is the first girl i've ever had true feelings for. The problem is i think she knows i more then like her, but at the same time she likes my friend ( well i don't know if she likes him but she's slept with him ) and is showing no other signs then friendship towards me, so she wants to keep being friends. If i tell her how i feel and get rejected, would it be wierd if i still wanted to be her friend, because i would still enjoy her company, or would it just be awkward and uncomfortable for her? Should i go for it or just shut my mouth and still be her friend, because up to a certain point i could actually live with it.

I am actually at that exact point with a guy, except he hasn't had sex with her, (also she isn't my friend) and I know he likes her, even after she rejected him. Sucky situation. Any advice from guys, or should I just give up?

CatAttack
Paperboy
Posts: 26
Joined: 15 May 2008

Tizer:
-Why do women think that they are superior to men. (Sorry I had to ask)
-What is with you and Harry Potter you're obsessed with it?
-Why do you always think you're sooo funny?

- some men thing they are superior to woman so it kidna evens out
-i cant stand harry potter =/
-cos i am!!!

DjDemonAsh
Anonymous Source
Posts: 5
Joined: 2 Apr 2008

RoundhouseR:

Perwer:
Question :

I have a friend, and she is the first girl i've ever had true feelings for. The problem is i think she knows i more then like her, but at the same time she likes my friend ( well i don't know if she likes him but she's slept with him ) and is showing no other signs then friendship towards me, so she wants to keep being friends. If i tell her how i feel and get rejected, would it be wierd if i still wanted to be her friend, because i would still enjoy her company, or would it just be awkward and uncomfortable for her? Should i go for it or just shut my mouth and still be her friend, because up to a certain point i could actually live with it.

I am actually at that exact point with a guy, except he hasn't had sex with her, and I know he likes her, even after she rejected him. Sucky situation. Any advice from guys, or should I just give up?

Never give up. If she's a true friend, even if she rejects you, she will still be your friend.
Ive been in that situation many times, I remember when my best friend was with a girl, She left him and i told her my feelings, she rejected me but today, 4 years on, we are still good friends me and her.

Tigerruby
Anonymous Source
Posts: 3
Joined: 28 Feb 2008

DjDemonAsh:
I got a very serious question here. something I'm not proud of.
My current other half enjoys my company, but, her best friend, enjoys my company ALOT more.
And to be completely honest, I enjoy her company more than my other halve's company.
After all, My other half does nothing but slap me for any joke I make, perverted, or not perverted.
Her friend though, Is one of my good friends other half.. What Do I do, I don't want to hurt either my other half, or my friend.. But, I want to be with this girl.

Speaking from the point of being a girl, I would go with the other girl. I mean, if your not happy with who your with, why should you stay with them? I suppose it depends on the situation, though. I would go with who I enjoy more because in the long run I'd feel better with my decision.

RoundhouseR
Paperboy
Posts: 17
Joined: 14 Feb 2008

call me alo:

X nosgoth X:
I know people judge me, because everyone judges other people at one point or another. That's really not what bothers me. After I freeze up during a hug, they ask me if something is wrong. I can't say 'nothing' because it's obvious something's the matter. Then I explain what the problem is, and always report that I'm trying to work on solving it. But it just never works out.

I don't want to be a huggy kind of guy, I just want someone to give me a chance here and I feel like I'm not dealing with it the right way.

AHHH i see your problem, when it happens what can you say? Well i got two ideas right off the bat. One even before it happens offer your hand for a hand shake. It will confuse them but sometimes thats a good thing, especially if its a girl. You'll come off mystirous. Second if it does happen people are just bothered because they think there something wrong with them. Even if you explain it to them sometimes people just dont get why your not hugging back. I think you should also cut the part about reporting that your trying to fix it, it might creep some people out. All and all i think knowing your weakness and working around is winning advice to anyone at anytime. I didnt mean huggy like your going to go around giving hugs to everyone but if you feel the need to touch someone like that i think your problem wont come in the way.

Ehh, I don't know about the handshake idea. If a guy offered me a handshake, I'd think there was something wrong with ME that he didn't want to hug me. I have pretty low self-esteem, so that could be that, but I'd just go for the hug, and if things go badly, just say "sorry, I'm not a very good hugger" and smile. It may even come off as cute, and girls like little insecurities like that.

Sorry this is like 4 pages later...

Chaos Marine
Paperboy
Posts: 35
Joined: 6 Feb 2008

Lord Krunk:
Please, can we keep this thread serious? I mean, serious enough to avoid stupid questions.

And another "relatively serious" question:

How do guys prepare for "That time of the month"? I mean, do we hide in a nuclear bunker or something until the storm is over?

I was being serious with my post.

Anarchemitis
Gone Gonzo
Posts: 3377
Joined: 23 Dec 2007

Anarchemitis:
Does this shirt match my suit?

<----

No seriously, from my avatar would a woman assume I had good taste in clothing?

xxkerouacxx
Paperboy
Posts: 22
Joined: 12 May 2008

In my experience guys DO actually know a few things about the opposite sex, but these revelations are diffused and refuted by females lest we men feel we are gaining a grasp on things

DigestiveBiscuit
Anonymous Source
Posts: 4
Joined: 9 May 2008

LV Solace:
Yes I would abandon my family

No I would not abandon my friends

BlazeTheVampire:
- family, well, that depends. I'm bisexual and my family's strictly Catholic. So if I decided that I loved another woman, then it would definitely be me versus family. Not too sure what the outcome would be.

- friends, never. Shouldn't have to. Both should be accepting of the other to truly call themselves friends or boyfriend/girlfriend.

So, even if these so-called 'friends' backstabbed you, or put you into awkward situations you would still not abandon them?

Could I get fries with that?

LV Solace:
No, no you may not.

BlazeTheVampire:
- You probably shouldn't have the fries. Extra calories, you know. :-P

This is the worst fast-food joint I've ever been served at! Two refusals; next it'll be 'why not have the apple slices instead?' or 'could you kindly leave sir, you are making a scene!'.

Fewer General Questions:
What is the most enjoyable kind of humour?
Prefer going out or staying in?
Do you prefer Eccentricity or Badass in someone?
Do you enjoy thinking (EG Philosophy) or being active (EG Dancing)?
Format Harddrive Y/N?

the monopoly guy
Gone Gonzo
Posts: 2364
Joined: 8 May 2008

how do you show someone you have changed (like in junior high i was incredibly annoying, and always hyper, and I really mellowed out and learned to shut up and all that but no one ever got that)

Sparkly Weasel
Beat Writer
Posts: 127
Joined: 8 May 2008

the monopoly guy:
how do you show someone you have changed (like in junior high i was incredibly annoying, and always hyper, and I really mellowed out and learned to shut up and all that but no one ever got that)

I've got the same problem. Still kept some of- scratch that, a lot of my quirks, I'm just trying to be a lot less annoying.

Is being celibate a bad thing for a relationship? Never had a GF, so I have no clue.

the monopoly guy
Gone Gonzo
Posts: 2364
Joined: 8 May 2008

yea, but all of my close friends know I have changed

redstar alpha
Beat Writer
Posts: 190
Joined: 9 Dec 2007

cant be arsed to read all nine pages so here are mine

-are all woman aware they hold the keys to EVERYTHING! i am not kiding, if a woman wants me to do some thing i am probaly going to do it (thats why i am know as the "just good friends guy")
-can you ever say the right thing about a womans clothes?
-is a beard a turn on?
-would swinging through a womans window in just a loin cloth win her heart (heres hoping yes)

BlazeTheVampire
Press Junketeer
Posts: 459
Joined: 14 May 2008

DigestiveBiscuit:

LV Solace:
Yes I would abandon my family

No I would not abandon my friends

BlazeTheVampire:
- family, well, that depends. I'm bisexual and my family's strictly Catholic. So if I decided that I loved another woman, then it would definitely be me versus family. Not too sure what the outcome would be.

- friends, never. Shouldn't have to. Both should be accepting of the other to truly call themselves friends or boyfriend/girlfriend.

So, even if these so-called 'friends' backstabbed you, or put you into awkward situations you would still not abandon them?

I don't trust people as a general rule. If a friend stabs me in the back, they're no longer a friend. Simple as that. They're no longer a friend and their opinion holds no sway in what I do.

redstar alpha:

cant be arsed to read all nine pages so here are mine

-are all woman aware they hold the keys to EVERYTHING! i am not kiding, if a woman wants me to do some thing i am probaly going to do it (thats why i am know as the "just good friends guy")
-can you ever say the right thing about a womans clothes?
-is a beard a turn on?
-would swinging through a womans window in just a loin cloth win her heart (heres hoping yes)

No, sadly, there are actually a lot of women out there who aren't confident enough in themselves to know they have the power to bring a man to his knees, lol. But honestly, grow a set. I have no respect for men who will do everything a woman asks just in the hopes of getting laid or sleeping on the couch instead of with them. Pink shirts are even worse. I actually heard a girl say to her boyfriend that if he loved her, he'd wear a pink shirt. And the fucker bought it! Bah. But, that's just me.

A woman's clothes... it depends on A) how well you know her and B) the occasion. A genuine "you look nice" when she's dressed up is always a good way to go.

Personally, I hate facial hair. But I know women who think it's rugged and sexy, so that's all a matter of personal preference.

I'm pretty sure that if a man wearing a loincloth swung through my window, I'd have my knife through him before he could land. Most girls would settle for calling the cops.

the monopoly guy
Gone Gonzo
Posts: 2364
Joined: 8 May 2008

well if a girl swung into my room only wearing a loincloth I would be happy-but then again I am a guy. and guys who will do whatever theyre girlfriend wants 'em to are little lapdogs in a mansuit, they are everyones bitch.

P.S. I have a pink shirt that says Meat is Murder-Tasty, Tasty Murder...is that as bad as the afformentioned lapdog?

damo69697
Paperboy
Posts: 17
Joined: 14 May 2008

Darth Mobius:
Okay, if you want to know how you feel about a woman, ask yourself two questions...

1) How often do you think about her?

And this will tell you how you feel about her...

2) How often is she fully clothed and doing normal everyday things?

if ur a guy like me then alot women doing daily things arent fully clothed

damo69697
Paperboy
Posts: 17
Joined: 14 May 2008

Chaos Marine:

Lord Krunk:
Please, can we keep this thread serious? I mean, serious enough to avoid stupid questions.

And another "relatively serious" question:

How do guys prepare for "That time of the month"? I mean, do we hide in a nuclear bunker or something until the storm is over?

I was being serious with my post.

run for the nuclear bunker in the hills, or alternativley fill her room with laughing gas so her mood doesnt sound as bad

Muphin_Mann
Copy Clerk
Posts: 78
Joined: 4 Oct 2007

Alright. I got a real quesiton for a lady, but it might not be easy to answer.

Why do girls insist on dating guys who are bad for them? Why are they drawn to, for instance, sociopaths? Or drug users?

I have watched guy friends train-wreck a relationship before, but it seems like its only the girls i know who truly encourage relationships with dangerous individuals.

Darth Mobius
Gone Gonzo
Posts: 3808
Joined: 26 Feb 2008

Spacelord:

Darth Mobius:
My ex-wife was more into porn than I am... She liked to watch the women bouncing... She likes Breasts as much as I do...

And you let her GO?!

Considering she was abusive, both physically and verbally, had no drive to do anything but stay home and be lazy, and was fucking a 30 year old man while telling me she wanted to try to work things out again... Yes, I gladly watched her go... Oh yeah, and she weighed 300 pounds and was only 5'5" tall... GLADLY TOLD her to go

Darth Mobius
Gone Gonzo
Posts: 3808
Joined: 26 Feb 2008

Sparkly Weasel:

Is being celibate a bad thing for a relationship? Never had a GF, so I have no clue.

Actually, it is a better thing... My ex- Joanna fell for every guy who was ever inside her, and thought she loved them all... Which is why she is probably going to date her ex-boyfriend who raped her best friend in her sleep...

You should keep sex out of a relationship until you are sure why you like the person... My ex-wife was insanely incredibly good in bed, but sucked at everything else in life... My girlfriend is only so-so in bed, but so much better for me and my life so it doesn't matter... Besides, I can teach her to be better...

Cheeze_Pavilion
Gone Gonzo
Posts: 1631
Joined: 10 Apr 2007

NezumiiroKitsune:

Timorous Meowth:

TonyOfPlimith:
Timorous Meowth is alluding to something... maybe that he's rich famous and as you American's would say "loaded". So here's a plan of action I purpose for Timorous... (if in fact he's rich, etc etc). Date my sister... go on do it! We're only half a world apart but I'm sure you two can make it work...

Unfortunately, no.

I'm not an attractive guy by any stretch of the imagination, so I was just wondering how rich I would have to become to be desirable.

Shuddup, and try harder. Money doesnt make a good relationship, it just gets you a whore that wants you dead. You just try your damned hardest, and if looks really arnt on your side it shouldnt matter if your a decent person.

Maybe looks "shouldn't" matter, but, they "do" matter. Why? Because people want to have sex with people who turn them on. And looks are a part of wanting to have sex with someone. Sure there's more to it, but, even the nicest, most amazing girl in the world wants to have someone who turns them on, just like we do.

Like I've said in other threads we really need to stop pretending women are these magical creatures who are here just to reward we men for being "decent people." They're not here to reward us in any way, shape, or form. They are here to live their own lives, same as we are. The idea that "looks shouldn't matter if you are a decent person" objectifies women by making them into something less than human.

Why does it make them less than human? Well, how many guys want to be with an unattractive-but-decent woman? Yeah, I thought so. Here's a big secret: women are *just like us* in that regard. They are human just like us.

As for money, money *will* get you something better than a "whore that wants you dead" for a couple of reasons.

1) Women fear being homeless. It's just something I've noticed about women--they want a home that they own and no one can take away so they don't wind up a baglady. I do not know why this is--maybe the way our society throws older women away even more frequently than it throws away older men. Money can get them a home.

2) Children are expensive. If a woman wants a family, money makes it more likely that you'll actually be able to have a family in a fiscally responsible fashion.

3) Women don't want to be bored. Money allows a person to do things besides buy sports cars and gold watches. It allows you to go to the opera or see a play or visit Machu Pichu or see Venice or any number of noble and mind-expanding activities that nevertheless cost money.

and finally

4) Women want successful men. And money to some women indicates a man is successful, that he's not a loser. Maybe equating 'successful' and 'rich' is shallow (and as a side note, being a "decent person" doesn't necessarily signal to others that you are a success--a success as a human being--however much it should), but that doesn't make a woman a "whore that wants you dead" that just makes her a little shallow, which leads me to my last point:

Just because a woman is shallow when it comes to selecting who she gets in a relationship with does not make her a shallow person. There are plenty of really great women out there who tip well and treat waitstaff with courtesy and volunteer for charities to take care of people with disfiguring diseases, who treat their boyfriends like gold, who nevertheless are shallow when it comes to picking guys to go out with.

This is really the other big myth men have to drop: how a woman picks and chooses among men to date says nothing else about her personality at all, not even how she treats the men she does pick. It's similar to the fable about the fox and the sour grapes. We want to be able to generalize the quality of a woman's entire personality based just on how noble or shallow her taste in men is, because that affects *us*. Well, that's simply not true, and we need to recognize that. The sooner we do, the sooner we start treating women like fellow humans and not like either a demon OR and angel.

And the sooner we realize that if you're ugly, it doesn't hurt to offset that by being rich the better for us as men. Why? Because there are plenty of women who treat people in general and the men they fall in love with like gold who are nevertheless a little shallow when it comes to their taste in men. If you want to stand on your principles, that's fine. Just know what principles you're standing on, because principles like "it shouldnt matter if your a decent person" or "Money...just gets you a whore that wants you dead" have the same logic of the statement 'if those grapes weren't sour, they wouldn't be so high off the ground'.

Cheeze_Pavilion
Gone Gonzo
Posts: 1631
Joined: 10 Apr 2007

redstar alpha:

-can you ever say the right thing about a womans clothes?

You can notice if her shoes match her outfit or something like that. A compliment on the effort she went to in getting herself to look like that is generally a 'right thing'.

Timorous Meowth
Anonymous Source
Posts: 4
Joined: 15 May 2008

Cheeze_Pavilion:
LONG POST IS LONG.

So basically, unless I hit it rich, I'm boned?

Darth Mobius
Gone Gonzo
Posts: 3808
Joined: 26 Feb 2008