Sometimes I think things I think no one else thinks. I think. Here are some of them:

If you stuck two matches in your nostrils, and you sneezed, would it create a jetstream of flame, like a flamethrower?
I have been told by a relative, who happens to be a doctor, that she thinks the snot would extinguish the flames, not encourage them.

I went to a cemetary yesterday, and saw the huge stone of a relative (gravestone, pervert). I knew the force of a fist wouldn't be enough to break it, and I doubted the force of a small car. So then I thought:
Would the force of a grenade be enough to break a tombstone?
I doubted it would, because I've seen the force of a real grenade, and they're not insanely powerful. Fragmentation grenades have a radius of up to 30 feet (some longer), but that's not the extent of the explosion, that's how far the shrapnel goes.

As you can tell, I'm a violent person.
Soooo, post your crazy thoughts in this thread.

P.S. Not the 'random statement' thread. The thoughts have to make some kind of sense, knowmmsayin'?

P.P.S. This isn't a thread for answering, just questioning, of course, if you had an answer to any of the questions, it'd be wonderful.

EDIT:

SargentToughie:
If I was in a car...In a tornado....and the tornado subsided, would I survive?

Many things are caught up in a tornado. If animals, other cars, and trees didn't crack the glass and impale you, and the tornado subsided, the car would probably fall hundreds of meters to the ground. If you were able to survive that (which I highly doubt; if you're lucky enough to land a patch of ground w/out anythings else in it, you have to realize seatbelts aren't made to withstand upward crashes, so your skull'd probably shatter on the roof), then you're probably the luckiest man on Earth.

If I was in a car...In a tornado....and the tornado subsided, would I survive?

cars generally knock over gravestones, because they're low to the ground, heavy and only held onto the base by two relatively small pins.

A grenade would probably mar the face of the gravestone that was facing the blast, but the force would just wrap around the grave stone not moving it.

Hm...

could you take out a cyborg with an EMP?

or maybe if you made an EMP Flamethrower.....

But how would that work..?

LewsTherin:
Hm...

could you take out a cyborg with an EMP?

Depends. the mechanical components, certainly, assuming they weren't shielded against that kind of an attack, but the organic bits wouldn't be affected at all. So, it becomes a question of how much of the cyborg is still squishy. If his heart and lungs are still there, then you'd immobilize, but not kill. if either had been replaced, you'd kill him.

I sometimes wonder: why do people INSIST on living in Tornado Alley, despite the name?

I think aliens are human beings from thousands of years in the future, traveling back in time to study us. It's the only rational explanation I can come up with for why they wouldn't invade or make contact. No matter how you shake it, for an alien species to travel all the way here and just take some photos is a bit odd.

The thing is...when I think that, I start wondering what their relationship with the past is at all. Is it like Stapledon and they just relish the experience of their ancestors? Or does it go deeper? What if they're facing some cataclysmic end to the planet, like the sun exploding, and there is nowhere to run? I don't believe in hyperspace or things like that, I'm of the rather negative opinion that we'll never be able to travel outside our galaxy. Do they travel back in time and inhabit our bodies? Do they literally reincarnate themselves over and over, trying to improve the fabric of society, so that one day we can escape our cataclysmic doom?

AngryMan:

LewsTherin:
Hm...

could you take out a cyborg with an EMP?

Depends. the mechanical components, certainly, assuming they weren't shielded against that kind of an attack, but the organic bits wouldn't be affected at all. So, it becomes a question of how much of the cyborg is still squishy. If his heart and lungs are still there, then you'd immobilize, but not kill. if either had been replaced, you'd kill him.

I sometimes wonder: why do people INSIST on living in Tornado Alley, despite the name?

Couldn't be bothered to move would be my guess. Also its pretty good farmland there from what i hear. What I want to know is why they rebuilt San Fransico right back on the San Andreas (Yes, that is the name) Fault after the Earthquake and Fire?

LewsTherin:
Couldn't be bothered to move would be my guess.

That's pretty goddamn lazy, considering all their houses have wheels

If you force fed someone iron dietary supplements for like 2 months straight could you then completely own them with a magnet?

AngryMan:

I sometimes wonder: why do people INSIST on living in Tornado Alley, despite the name?

because the view from heaven is amazing.

(if you see what i did there)

I often ponder why police stations dont own their own coffee and donut stores to house INSIDE the station for it's officers. I mean, imagine the revenue you'd save if they spend their paychecks on YOUR coffee, etc..

edit: someone suckered me into my first post...oh well I suppose it's all downhill from here.

At what point does CPR go from medical procedure to necrophelia?

If pregnant with twins or more, can you abort one but not the others?

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a lesbian?

If beavers can without tools, build functional dams, wtf is so hard about fixing New Orleans?

If the human body is 75% water, why are we so flammable?

An astronaut went into one of those revolving pods in order to get himself used to the G-Force. However, it malfunctioned and the Gs went up so high (to a point where the boiling point of water becomes lower than body temperature, it was that high), that he said he 'had the sensation of his saliva evaporating off his tongue'.

How the hell did he know what that felt like before hand?

If I suddenly leapt out of my chair and beat one of my lecturers/fellow students to a bloody pulp. How would I explain my way out it?

Can catch berms be ridden the same way as rail berms, or do you have to apply the catch technique to all of them?

this seems oddly similiar to the random statements thread, without any of the kitty pictures...
does the toaster feel pain?

LewsTherin:

Couldn't be bothered to move would be my guess.

the number one way to avoid tornados is to not live in trailer parks. God hates trailer parks. When has a tornado NOT hit a trailer park?

Am I the only one who has to add five minutes to every treck outdoors because I get excited by the pretty sky?

I often wonder about time travel; My theory is that if you went back in time and changed something it wouldn't matter because you or that is another one of you had already been back and done it! A bit like fix-the-spade but sometimes I just don't hand in my homework or anything like just because I am great at improv lies. (Or am I? O.o) I often wonder just how we can think or see images in our mind not quite properly but definitely there.

Edit: I forgot to say, I always and I mean always imagine just how much damage a crossbow bolt (or other things but mainly quarrels) would do to something, including people.

Khell_Sennet:
If the human body is 75% water, why are we so flammable?

Its the fact that most of the water is on the inside. The carbon on the outside burns quite well.

What do the NPC MMORPG quest-givers do with all the mutilated monster bits I give them?

I know its not particularly original but I tend to ponder on things such as the philosophical riddle "If a tree falls in a forest and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound?", stuff like that tends to make me go all deep.

Also why does Paris Hilton exist? Don't think the most brilliant minds in the world can answer that one.

What happens if you get "scared-half-to-death" twice?

What is the difference between a novel and a book?

Where do people in Hell tell other people to go?

When I was a teenager, I once had an urge to wreck everything at my job...

ThePoodonkis:

Where do people in Hell tell other people to go?

The View

can i make a gun out of ipods?

heres one from futurama, if somebody went to the past and "did" their grandmother what the hell would happen?

the monopoly guy:

ThePoodonkis:

Where do people in Hell tell other people to go?

The View

Then where do they go?

Kinda lazy so I'll only post a couple.

Can you get heavy metal poisoning from extreme amounts of Iron?

How the HELL would Hell work? Assuming we maintain our adaptability, we'd be used to the pain in the first hundred years and have to sit around doing nothing for the rest of eternity.

If you are electrocuted, and your heart stops but there isn't really any other damage, is it possible to restart your own heart before you run out of strength?

leugim789:
heres one from futurama, if somebody went to the past and "did" their grandmother what the hell would happen?

Sex =/= Guaranteed Pregnancy. There's a chance nothing would happen, except the grandmotherhumper would probably be pretty messed up. Either way, if you did knock up your grandmother in the past, the person she gives birth to would not be the same person that sired you, and so you would not have been born, and thus could not have traveled back in time, thus nothing would happen.

My belief in time travel is that it can't be done. Any action in the past negates the future you traveled from, and if you didn't travel back, it never happened thus the past cannot be changed.

How many dead babies does it take to make a set of 4 tires?

If my aunt had three wheels she'd be a tricycle.

L.B. Jeffries:
I think aliens are human beings from thousands of years in the future, traveling back in time to study us. It's the only rational explanation I can come up with for why they wouldn't invade or make contact. No matter how you shake it, for an alien species to travel all the way here and just take some photos is a bit odd.

When "you" go out into the african savannah to observe and document Tigers, do you try to communicate in the language or tigers or do you just "abduct" them into a strange place with bright lights?

I don't have a crazy "question" per-se, but I spend most of my days finding the best place to take-out my company and leave the bodies without being caught. That certainly would freak some people out I'm sure.

"If you force fed someone iron dietary supplements for like 2 months straight could you then completely own them with a magnet?"

No, you get rid of any excess nutrients when you pee. It'd be easier to just get them to eat some solid iron capsules.

"How the hell did he know what [saliva tongue evaporation] felt like before hand?"

He didn't. He felt the sensation of the saliva evaporating, and guessed at the cause.

"Am I the only one who has to add five minutes to every treck outdoors because I get excited by the pretty sky?"

Yay, someone else that spends too much time looking at the sky~ It's like a landscape painting that never stops moving.

"Where do people in Hell tell other people to go?"

"The View"

"Then where do they go?"

People in the View are incapable of independent thought. They do not tell people to go anywhere.

LewsTherin:
Hm...

could you take out a cyborg with an EMP?

Well at least not if you're in the BLAME! universe...

If you have a 3-dimentional universe that is a hypersphere, with a "diameter" of say 100 miles, would you then be able to see yourself no matter which way you looked? And would would there be a patter of yourself (like in a hall of mirrors) or just one? (This is a mystery I have thought about alot, I think the observers paradox would ensure that no matter wich way you looked and no matter where you where you would always see yourself in you center of weiw, and no matter where you where you could travel in any direction for 100 miles and end up where you where before).

If you got any of that then you are pretty awesome... becuse I'm not sure if I get it...

the monopoly guy:

does the toaster feel pain?

Talki-Toaster(TM) feels pain :P

ThePoondonkis:
What happens if you get "scared-half-to-death" twice?

you'd be 75% dead, 25 % alive

"Look, we want no muffins, no toast, no teacakes, no buns, baps, baggetes or
bagels, no croissants, no crumpets, no pancakes, no potato cakes, and no hot
cross buns, and DEFINITELY... no smeggin' flapjacks."

I thought of this one earlier while holding a conversation with an idiot:
Imagine gluing/welding different parts of animals together, my idea was back half of a beaver and front of an armadillo.

MagnetoHydroDynamics:

If you have a 3-dimentional universe that is a hypersphere, with a "diameter" of say 100 miles, would you then be able to see yourself no matter which way you looked? And would would there be a patter of yourself (like in a hall of mirrors) or just one? (This is a mystery I have thought about alot, I think the observers paradox would ensure that no matter wich way you looked and no matter where you where you would always see yourself in you center of weiw, and no matter where you where you could travel in any direction for 100 miles and end up where you where before).

You're the only thing that absorbs light in 100 miles, aside from, presumably, a lightbulb. The whole sphere would reflect you. It'd be like standing inside an enormous funhouse mirror, a massive, crazy distorted mess of your skin, hair, whatever shirt you happened to be wearing, and so on. The universe would appear to shift in all directions whenever you moved.

That reminds me... I once saw an optical illusion, involving a half-spherical mirror set into the wall. I think you could see your reflection as a 3D image if you put your head inside. Perhaps, if you found the right point in your hypersphere, you could see your entire body from all sides, in 3D.