Reasonable Doubt:

I wish I was Master Chief.

Granted, too bad ur surounded by 500 brutes with a magnum with 12 bullets and no escape

i wish i had the power to control corn

dam slowness

granted. movie-going teenagers kill all your minions.
(btw ytf corn??)
i wish for heatseeking missiles.

granted but too bad you are the only warm thing left.

i wish to have a doom fortress.

granted, you have a doom fort in a large pile of radoaxtive sludge you get a large tumor and die

I WANT A MONKEY

Granted to bad it is empty and explodes.

I wish for a T-Rex

granted, too bad its mentally unstable.

i wish to understand the complexities of time.

granted but u cant understand anything else

i wish i knew the meaning of life

granted, too bad somebody finds it out before you.

i wish there was pie in the sky.

Granted, to bad it falls and kills you.

I wish for my own personal bordello. (Pretty much a hooker house that I own.)

granted, you get herpes from sampling your own girls.

i wish i didn't have to pay for anything.

[quote=SteinFaust]
(btw ytf corn??)

corn is yummy and i always wanted to make a ARMY OF CORN btw there is a differnt kind of corn for pop corn so i only lose HALF MY ARMY MWHAHA

granted, too bad you got put in jail for theft.

i wish heaven was a half pipe.

granted , to bad the earth explodes 10 seconds later

i wish i worked at market basket

okay since i missed the guy above me

granted but u fall off the halfpipe and land in hell

Banditkyle:
[quote=SteinFaust]
(btw ytf corn??)
corn is yummy and i always wanted to make a ARMY OF CORN btw there is a differnt kind of corn for pop corn so i only lose HALF MY ARMY MWHAHA

HAHAHAHAHA okay then. at least you didn't want to make 'children of the corn'.

SteinFaust:
[quote=Banditkyle][quote=SteinFaust]

HAHAHAHAHA okay then. at least you didn't want to make 'children of the corn'.

nah man im only after their parents "wink" wow that was lame

try stay on topic here people...

Granted, unfortunately I don't know what market basket is and you wind up working at Kenny's Shoes.
I wish I had a Ferrari

Granted, u get ur knew ferari (Sp) to bad the box says MAJOR ASSEMBLY REQUIRED

i wish that guy knew what market basket was

granted, but that information replaces everything you know.

i wish for a banhammer

whats a banhammer?
*takes cover*

Granted, but it's an experemental Ferrari only runs on rocket fuel, which you don't have the money to buy.

I wish I sucked at life and nobody loved me.

TJ rock 101:
whats a banhammer?
*takes cover*

ROFL *SMASH!!!* it's for banning people from the internet.

granted. you suck at life and a person named Nobody loves you.

i wish for a talking pencil

Granted , but now ur lonely and you kill your self BUT satan and god hate you so ur sent to limbo( between heaven and hell but for some reason not earth) where old people play bingo ALL DAY

i wish i knew why old people like bingo

for te gentleman above me who i missed

Granted, but some kid uses it for a test and it loses its mouth to the pencil sharpener

granted, too bad it talks in chinese.

i wish i knew the dictionary off by heart.

granted. but all anyone wants to talk about is thesauruses

i wish i had a flamethrower

granted, too bad it fires backwards.

i wish i could move planets.

i have to go, have fun

granted. they all attract to you at once. *SMASH*

i wish i could leave work early.

granted, to bad every one but u gets a raise

i wish i could eat anything i want and not get fat

Granted, you just die from a cholesterol level of 10000.

i wish my headache had not turned into a migraine.

Granted, it turned into a rabid weasel instead. Now you have lockjaw.

I wish I was free from this office.

Granted. now you're fired.

i wish disney stopped making movies

Granted, now Uwe Boll is making more movies.

I wish I knew what I wanted to wish for.

Granted but you wish that you lost all your worldly possessions.

I wish that I had the power to kill whoever i wanted by singing to them.