Also...let's take a look at FF plots.

1) Garland uses time travel to rise an ancient beast
2) evil emperor tries to command hell itself
3) the balance of light and dark was messed up. Too much good can cause destruction as well. Your world is really just a floating continent.
4) well the remake is coming out and they say that they are bringing in the other 90% of the plot left out in the original so lets just wait for this one.
5) never played
6) evil empire destroyed by super soldier who becomes a god
7) evil electric company destroyed by shapeshifting alien and her son who is frozen in a crater for years. Now add in emo
8) time travelling witch does stuff
9) fake person tries to destroy other fake person and entire planets just to prove he's better
10) religion = bad
10-2) ghosts attack the world for revenge on their deaths
11) never played
tactics) never payed attention to the plot. Too busy losing cuz I suck at it
12) politics = bad
CC) evil creation is absorbing the memories of the people and poisoning the world
Tactics advanced) never played

when you equip a suit of gold armor it looks suspiciously like a zippere'd vest

that said i love all things FF

Gravity=(13/15)x1^-3 And everyone has flying spells. Which means gravity is negative and people are flying negative, therefore gravity is redundant opposite and you weigh almost nil.

VRaptorX:
Also...let's take a look at FF plots.
5) never played

Basically, lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots of stuff happens, and then you save the world.

Lvl 64 Klutz:

VRaptorX:
Also...let's take a look at FF plots.
5) never played

Basically, lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots of stuff happens, and then you save the world.

Yeah. That game literally went on for months. Huge playability, mind; and the story wasn't half bad either.

No matter what items of cloathing you're wearing you can survive any weather conditions ranging from blistering desert to sub-zero antarctic wasteland and not die of exposure.

Wild animals carry around lots of money and accessories.

Tomberys are NOT YOUR FRIEND!!!

You can attack enemies with heavy attacks but these attacks and abilities can't be used to get around obstacles.

As tough as the main villain was, there is always a far stronger creature in the deepest reaches of the world.

androgyny is A-OK

AngryMan:
Am I the only person in the world who actually enjoyed FFX-2?

nah it wasnt to bad...just very...urm shallow...

oh an that 20 year olds can kill masiive ass monsters bigger than skyscarppers by slashing their feet ^^

characters somehow have the ability to leap over entire buildings in cutscenes but can't cross that small stream in gameplay

-Screw education; all you need is a Crystal and you can become proficient with at least 3 jobs. This may be why Crystals are in such high regard that everyone tries to either collect them all or destroy them all.

-There's a reason most people don't run anywhere; they don't want any money to fall out of their pockets when they do so. Conversely, everything has some amount of cash on it, even rats.

-You can breathe on the moon, in space, or in alternate dimensions.

-Good will always triumph, because Evil procrastinates before ending the world!

-Eht dlrow si erauqs

WhiteFangofWar:

-Eht dlrow si erauqs

Awesome post.

Also, You can look like a clown....but you can still tear the world apart.

1.) Always leave one person alive. Only one, though. The rest can be phoenix down'd.
2.) Even if it looks like a path, it's not. It's a clever ploy to keep you in a corner trying to go through the "short-cut" until someone can attack you. And that someone will undoubtedly be the hardest monster to beat. EVER.
3.) Stealing is not bad. In fact, you SHOULD steal because you never know what kind of item combinations you'll get.
4.) Never get off the train at the wrong stop. You'll wander around aimlessly for years until you find out the one path you need to walk isn't, in fact, foot friendly. And there aren't going to be anymore trains, either.
5.) If you find a glowing spot on the ground, run over to it and stand dramatically. What do mean 'radioactivity'?
6.) Anything can be achieved through a little perseverance and good old game of cards.
7.) Beauty is only as deep as your sphere level.
8.) The vehicle you ride around in is, in fact, bigger than any city or small peninsula.
9.) Giving your friends a list of things they have to do under all circumstances is a great way to micro-manage.
10.) Running away makes problems go away. Hitting and running does the same PLUS exp.

FFVIII, main characters get the right to be in a trading card game played everywhere around the world. Also, if you play a game of cards and introduce rules from a different continent, suddenly, everyone else on the continent that the game is taking place knows the rules.

If a battle could be made easier by using any kind of status or time magic, expect the enemy to be immune. IE pretty much any boss battle, I mean come on, are you really going to take the time to cast slow or blind on a common, random encounter enemy?

Mainly from FF but RPGs in general.
1) Anyone with long silver hair will not only be incredibly powerful but will also be freaking insane and destroy a town/city/world.
2) Pheonix downs dont work if you happen to get attacked in a FMV.
3) There is only one black person in the entire world and s/he will be super powered.
4) From FF-X2. Motomu Toriyama is the Uwe Boll of the gaming world. HE TOOK FINAL FANTASY AND TURNED IT INTO FRIKKIN BRITNEY DANCE BEAT!!! *puff wheeze*

actually...has there ever been a silver haired hero in FF?

Tales series yes but I don't remember any in FF.

avykins:

4) From FF-X2. Motomu Toriyama is the Uwe Boll of the gaming world. HE TOOK FINAL FANTASY AND TURNED IT INTO FRIKKIN BRITNEY DANCE BEAT!!! *puff wheeze*

He also took the most emo and wangsty installment of the FF series and made it fun.

GloatingSwine:

avykins:

4) From FF-X2. Motomu Toriyama is the Uwe Boll of the gaming world. HE TOOK FINAL FANTASY AND TURNED IT INTO FRIKKIN BRITNEY DANCE BEAT!!! *puff wheeze*

He also took the most emo and wangsty installment of the FF series and made it fun.

Theres a special place in hell for you...

1. Swallowing tiny marbles of earth goo gives you magic powers.
2. If there is a color, there is a magic for it.
3. Pockets are actually extra dimensional spaces for storing items.
4. Things i rip off dead monsters can be sold for lots of money.
5. Grinding for 6 hours straight is the solution to any problem.
6. For any other problem (see giant fucking swords).
7. There is always a "second" final boss.
8. Final Fantasy should not be an MMORPG.
9. Men look like 14 year old women.
10. Gunblades CAN be brought to a gun fight.
11. Whats FF8?
12. Giant chickens > horses,cars,air planes,ect.
13. There is only 1 set of spell animations.
14. Physics are for pussies.

Forgive me for this, it's just the game's so goddamn overrated! Especially compared to VI.

If a game is released in 1997 and just so happens to be called final fantasy VII you can and are legally obliged to milk for all it is worth.

I have to wait to fight someone. Therefore it has taught me to be quite polite in that respect.

"After you!"
"No, no, after YOU!"
"Oh I insist, after you, sir!"
"Not at all!"
Etc, etc.

When an important character dies(in the story) ...The people that says you can bring them back are lying.

If you want to beat the game you have to TRAIN, TRAIN, TRAIN.

The coolest things can only be found by animals (Angelo in FF8 and the Chocobo in FF9)

VRaptorX:
actually...has there ever been a silver haired hero in FF?

Tales series yes but I don't remember any in FF.

Two words.

Setzer Gabbiani.

Go play Final Fantasy VI and we'll talk.

Anyway, what I have learned...

...Is that no matter how cool the theory of "Blue Magic" is, it will never replace a well-placed NUKE*.

* = This applies to both real nukes and the NUKE spell from the first game.

Trusting teenagers and/or children with world destructive powers is a totally responsible thing to do. There's no way a hormonal teenager is going to use that power for their own ends when they turn their angst up to 11.

Meeting the same beautiful, yet oddly accessible, girl twice in a short period of time is definetly a sign that you're meant to fall in love and be together for ever. Go for it.

FPS taught me

- if it moves shoot it

- gun and grenades solve everything

- hitting someone with the butt of your gun is more lethal than a shot in the chest

- all you need is a muscle bound space marine with a big ass gun to save the world

- if your hurt hide under a table for 5 seconds and all your wounds will be instantly healed
and if that doesn't work eat a box with a red cross on it

- all the worlds problems can be solves by moving from point A to point B and shooting anything that moves

-teabaging makes every one feel better

- when you shoot a gun there is a giant white circle that tells you where your aiming

- if you shoot a car 4 5 times it will go on fire and explode

- if you die don't worry you'll just come back to life 5 minutes ago to do every thing you just accomplished all over again

- man up a take those 5 gun shot would in your chest

- in war the best strategy is to run in guns blazing

- D-Day wasn't THAT BAD

- Nazis are the ultimate evil and must be shot

- its not blood its red paint

- all your allies are retarded and you have to everything

- in world war two one person did all the hard work and had a really bad nick name

That no matter if your a big monster, a doll controlling crack ho or wear one pant leg longer than the other that you too can have a final boss battle that drags on too long

or be loved, either one really

VRaptorX:
actually...has there ever been a silver haired hero in FF?

Tales series yes but I don't remember any in FF.

Setzer from FF 6 and Firion/Frionel From FF2 both had silver hair, and both were made of awesome.

Firion has silver hair?

Man. I thought it was just a disgusting color of blue. Must be goin' color blind...

Anyway, I've also learned that taking a couple steps back from someone will halve the physical pain they could do to you with say, a punch to the face.

A weapon in a cutscene is instantly deadly despite the fact that you just fought through legions of enemies with the same weapons and the weapon barely hurt you.

monsters drop EVERYTHING!
except what you want at the time.

Ritz Dijuto:
Firion has silver hair?

Man. I thought it was just a disgusting color of blue. Must be goin' color blind...

Anyway, I've also learned that taking a couple steps back from someone will halve the physical pain they could do to you with say, a punch to the face.

Yea the GBA messes it up badly, but if you look at the original concept art and him in dissidia he clearly has silver/white hair. That "blue" you see is his bandanna.

Anyways I learned:

-Don't fuck with clowns, they may look silly but they will do nasty things
-Mythical bird feathers revive dead people, but only if their death is not a plot device
-stones are no match for a needle made of gold
-Giant canary/ostrich birds are more worthy battle steeds than horses.
-It's easier to get a job in final fantasy than it is in real life, the pay is better too, risks...not so much
-If you have a German Shepard, it will always come to your rescue in battle
-Apparently putting propellers on a boat makes them fly
-Jumping really really high avoids all danger and your shins wont break upon landing.

Oh here's something I've learned.

Each and every established governement on the side of good completely deserves to be conquered. They are incapable of training an effective army, creating an effective transportation system or infrastructure, collect taxes or really do anything at all that a good governement should do.

In comparison the evil conquerors are almost uniformly a wonder of organization and efficiency with a highly trained army and advanced technology.

The good governments must rely on the goodwill of heros who they refuse to pay or equip and then send out on errands with no chance of reward all in the name of good.

Limos:
Oh here's something I've learned.

Each and every established governement on the side of good completely deserves to be conquered. They are incapable of training an effective army, creating an effective transportation system or infrastructure, collect taxes or really do anything at all that a good governement should do.

In comparison the evil conquerors are almost uniformly a wonder of organization and efficiency with a highly trained army and advanced technology.

The good governments must rely on the goodwill of heros who they refuse to pay or equip and then send out on errands with no chance of reward all in the name of good.

Yea heroes are like Community service or something with the good governments. The satisfaction of saving the world isn't going to pay the bills and go out to the pubs every friday. Good thing monsters always carry money on them, and they are easy to mug....for the most part.

Final Fantasy has taught me, that when the zombie uprising occurs, I can survive by throwing medical products at them.