Now Chapter 1. And dont tell me I have bad grammer, because I know I do. All I want to know is how goofdthe story itself is to you people!
Meanwhile, at Ft.Lauderdale...
"Alright you poo flinging fur bag, get a taste of El Picante!!! Said Cuban Guy as he used his spicy breath to temporarily blind the "Atomic Powered Monkey Man", Lutenant Simmion.
He then popped out a keg of his special "Tequila" and pours it down the primates throught, casusing the monkey to be so drunk, that he killed every man, women, and child who had'nt evacuated the area, due to the high level of radiation before suconing to to the magic eleixer. "Hehe, atomically powered my steroetypical ass!" He then jumped of the cat walk he was on and dropped down into one of the many cananls dotting the city to get Bryan who was knocked out by Simmion and even more knocked out due to being an electricity based hero, in water.
Cuban Guy the got onto one of the many over turned boats, each telling their own stroy about WWIII. As he looked across the canal, he was hit with memories of all the screams and noise he heard when he was in Nam, that they his entire company was wiped out by "Colonel Killer" and his mercs. All the blood shed, all of the fire, the smell of toasted and rotting flesh. And for what? For a bunch of ungreatful Japs!!!???
He was then reminded of his many encounters with Colenl Killer during thte last World War. He allways use his Desert Eagles, allways. He'd shoot himself out of situations and oftne shoot first adn ask questions later if anyone disobeyed him. And everytime Cuban Guy grabbed Colonel Killer by the neck with one hand, and holding his Machette in the other, Colonel Killer would allways use his most powerful weapon, his ability to "Lie himself out of any situation."
Before he could finish his thoughts however, what looked to be a large bipedal crab/beetle and gator were thrown at him from, whcih turned out to be "Jahleel" with his Chitin armor cracked and "Croc", from the same catwalk he was just on by Seargent Gibbons.
As he surfaced he said: "I wonder what the Pend-e-hos are doing", as the monkey man smashed into the water occupied by Cuban Guy.
AT the "Wierdo"s secret base on the bottom of the St.Johns river...
"Damn it, you beat me again Jr.", said Micheal.
"Read 'em and weep retard, said Jr., levetating Micheals gold bars using "Mass Effect" fields.
"Who are you calling a retard mutt? At least I'm not some genetically altered beagle pup who can amnipulate "Mass Effect"! I can bend reality naturally! He then snapped his fingers on his right and opened up his left hand revealing the two gold bars Jr. took from him.
"Give those back beforeI take 'em from you beaner!!!"
"Ok, first off, I'm a Puerto-Rican/Panamanian hybrid, second, I'll give 'em back to you if you take 'em from me in my game, and not uno!!!
"Whats that you 12 year old pycho?"
"I'll tell you. First we each need to grab a 2 liter bottle of "Soda de Pina"(I dont know how to put a tilde on the "n" in "Pina", so just prnounce it as if it was on there.) Junior then warps in 2 2 liter bottles of Pineapple Soda in front of them.
"Now what?"
"Now we watch "Americas Funniest Home Videos", and whenever something not funny and gay happends, we take a drink. He then snapps his fingers again, causing the channel to change to ABC family.
"Hello, my name is Bob Saget and welcome to Americas Funniest Home Videos"!
"Drink!" Said Micheal and Jr. in Unison as they gulped down a large percent of the bottle.
"When do we stop?"
"When one of us keel over and groan in pain! Or until our kidneys/and or livers explode. Whichever comes first.
Meanwhile, in some dark prison cell somewhere in the unknown...
"How the bugger did we end up here"? Asked Nomad.
"Remember Nomad, that mechanized vixen captured us". Said Chris
"I know you retarded Britt! I'm just in denial"!
Quit insulting Chris!" Scram Trilby.
Before Chris could react to what Trilby had said, Trilby cut him off by saying: "I'm not telling him to stop because I'm growing fond of you you gay tart, infct it would have given me a kick if he had'nt insulted mother Britain."
"I thought you said Patriotism is for twats".
Usually, yes, but since I'm bore and walls of this cell are driving me mad with Schrzophremia, I'm willing to talk nationalistic smack with this wench lesbo they call and Australian. Speaking of which, Australians are the decendents of violent loonies.
"Why you litte...", right before he said shit, 25 machine Gun bullets seperated Nomad from beating from beating Trilby to a pulp.
As they looked out the cell, they saw their capturer with Trilby unbrella in her left, and a big chest hanging from her right.
"Nice Umbrella, how do you reload it?"
"Come in this cell and I'll show you by sticking it up your ass winch"!!! Said Nomad.
"Please, If I went in there, I could make you eat your own shit with one hand behind my back, but I'm not. No, my employer wants me to ask you fools to join him is a mish, to break "X" out". Join him, and the rewards will be great." She then places the chest down and opens it, revealing emeralds, rubys, diamonds, and more rubys as big as a babies head.
"Hehe, you honesty think that we can be bought over by that bull-shit?" Asked Nomad.
"Yeah! Not even Trilby would join you!!! And he's a dirty art theif! Said Chris, laughing and turing towards Trilby. Trilby then pucnhes Chris in the face an puts his right hand on his chin in a thinkig position.
"Hmmm, gems, getting my Umbrella back,freedom,a mission, my god, its like you know me. I'm in".
"Good, because if you did'nt, I'd have to hurt you, like these bots are about to hurt you friends".
She then presses one of the many black and red buttons on her right arm, causing two trap doors on either side of the cell to pen up, reavealing 2 Twelve foot tall machines who then walked up to the cell, let Trilby out, and then let themselves inside the cell, staring down at Chris, in his brown jacket with a blue shirt underneath, and Nomad in his desert tunic. As trilby stands beside X-2, X-2 says: I call them the "cherry pickers".
"Why?" Asked Chris The robots then put their humongus arms into the under wear of both Chris and Nomad, and plucked two pubic hairs each. As they fell down in pain, Nomad said: 'Of course"!
Trilby and the captor walked away. "My Umbrella, please". Said Trilby to his fromer captor, who hands it over. "So where are we exactly, Ms....
"X-2. Said X-2. And to amswer your question, we're in a ship.
"What ocean? The Atlantic, Pacific, Antarctic..."
Actually we're in high orbit above "The Moon".
They came to a blast door, she activates it, as Trilby gets a confused look on his face.
As it opens, he sees a command center, where workersand engineers were working like bees, and beyond that was a view of earth from space, blocked partiallly by the view of the moon.
"Wow. Whos your emplyer"?
Back at Ft.Lauderdale...
"Stupid monkey!" Said Croc, as Jahleel and Cuban Guy surfeaced(with bryan still in his arms).
"Speaking of monkeys mon" said Jahleel, pointing at the monkey coming at them at 20 knots.
"Go and headbutt him Crocodilo! Your species was made for the water!" Said Cuban Guy.
"Hey, I find that offensive! Im not a Croc from your world! I'm bipedal for my many gods sake!
"Fine, just go and get 'em gringo!Said Cuban Guy.
"Thats another thing, why do you keep calling me an insult intended for the whiter of your species! I'm not human! I have green and scaly skin!
"Alright Croc, I'm sorry, now go and drown that mother fucker before he drowns us...
Before he can finish, the "Monkey Man" pulled him down, and starts strangling him with its tale.
"Hold on mon, were coming! Said Jahleel as he and croc dived down. As they went down, Jahleel regenerated ythe parts of his armor that had cracked from accidently being bitten by croc.
Jahleel, grabbed Cuban Guy, trying to pull him from the monkeys tail. The monkey, howver, was stronger, and continued pulling down Cuban Guy and strangling him. Croc, in a move of desperation, bit the monkey in the ass, amking it let go and scream in pain,until it wasted so much of its breath it started to drown, and shitted on "Croc" in order to break free.
Croc, however held on, even with shit in his mouth, until the monkey blacked out. After it did that. Croc let go and swam to the surface.
After they surfaced, Cuban Guy started coughing and spitting out water, while slurring: "Wheres Bruan?"
As they looked around, Colonel Simmion barfs on them from the cat walk. As Cuban Guy, Jahleel, and Croc barfed from the sight and smell of partiaally digested bannanas and tequila, the final final member of "The Atomically Powered Monkey Men" (who was hinding in the cnal in a wet suit)"Corperal S.pider, surfaced from the water and fired a torpedo at them, holding on to Bryan, who he had stolen.
Jahleel, hearing the beeping, put his hands on Cuban Guy and Croc, and channeled his thick armor unto them.As the torpedo hit, they survived, but the shockwavw sent them winding down the canal.
As the wave sent him down, Cuban Guy saw all three monkey men with Bryan on the catwalk, laughing their little monkey laugh.
Now Chapter 1. And dont tell me I have bad grammer, because I know I do. All I want to know is how goofdthe story itself is to you people!
Meanwhile, at Ft.Lauderdale...
"Alright you poo flinging fur bag, get a taste of El Picante!!! Said Cuban Guy as he used his spicy breath to temporarily blind the "Atomic Powered Monkey Man", Lutenant Simmion.
He then popped out a keg of his special "Tequila" and pours it down the primates throught, casusing the monkey to be so drunk, that he killed every man, women, and child who had'nt evacuated the area, due to the high level of radiation before suconing to to the magic eleixer. "Hehe, atomically powered my steroetypical ass!" He then jumped of the cat walk he was on and dropped down into one of the many cananls dotting the city to get Bryan who was knocked out by Simmion and even more knocked out due to being an electricity based hero, in water.
Cuban Guy the got onto one of the many over turned boats, each telling their own stroy about WWIII. As he looked across the canal, he was hit with memories of all the screams and noise he heard when he was in Nam, that they his entire company was wiped out by "Colonel Killer" and his mercs. All the blood shed, all of the fire, the smell of toasted and rotting flesh. And for what? For a bunch of ungreatful Japs!!!???
He was then reminded of his many encounters with Colenl Killer during thte last World War. He allways use his Desert Eagles, allways. He'd shoot himself out of situations and oftne shoot first adn ask questions later if anyone disobeyed him. And everytime Cuban Guy grabbed Colonel Killer by the neck with one hand, and holding his Machette in the other, Colonel Killer would allways use his most powerful weapon, his ability to "Lie himself out of any situation."
Before he could finish his thoughts however, what looked to be a large bipedal crab/beetle and gator were thrown at him from, whcih turned out to be "Jahleel" with his Chitin armor cracked and "Croc", from the same catwalk he was just on by Seargent Gibbons.
As he surfaced he said: "I wonder what the Pend-e-hos are doing", as the monkey man smashed into the water occupied by Cuban Guy.
AT the "Wierdo"s secret base on the bottom of the St.Johns river...
"Damn it, you beat me again Jr.", said Micheal.
"Read 'em and weep retard, said Jr., levetating Micheals gold bars using "Mass Effect" fields.
"Who are you calling a retard mutt? At least I'm not some genetically altered beagle pup who can amnipulate "Mass Effect"! I can bend reality naturally! He then snapped his fingers on his right and opened up his left hand revealing the two gold bars Jr. took from him.
"Give those back beforeI take 'em from you beaner!!!"
"Ok, first off, I'm a Puerto-Rican/Panamanian hybrid, second, I'll give 'em back to you if you take 'em from me in my game, and not uno!!!
"Whats that you 12 year old pycho?"
"I'll tell you. First we each need to grab a 2 liter bottle of "Soda de Pina"(I dont know how to put a tilde on the "n" in "Pina", so just prnounce it as if it was on there.) Junior then warps in 2 2 liter bottles of Pineapple Soda in front of them.
"Now what?"
"Now we watch "Americas Funniest Home Videos", and whenever something not funny and gay happends, we take a drink. He then snapps his fingers again, causing the channel to change to ABC family.
"Hello, my name is Bob Saget and welcome to Americas Funniest Home Videos"!
"Drink!" Said Micheal and Jr. in Unison as they gulped down a large percent of the bottle.
"When do we stop?"
"When one of us keel over and groan in pain! Or until our kidneys/and or livers explode. Whichever comes first.
Meanwhile, in some dark prison cell somewhere in the unknown...
"How the bugger did we end up here"? Asked Nomad.
"Remember Nomad, that mechanized vixen captured us". Said Chris
"I know you retarded Britt! I'm just in denial"!
Quit insulting Chris!" Scram Trilby.
Before Chris could react to what Trilby had said, Trilby cut him off by saying: "I'm not telling him to stop because I'm growing fond of you you gay tart, infct it would have given me a kick if he had'nt insulted mother Britain."
"I thought you said Patriotism is for twats".
Usually, yes, but since I'm bore and walls of this cell are driving me mad with Schrzophremia, I'm willing to talk nationalistic smack with this wench lesbo they call and Australian. Speaking of which, Australians are the decendents of violent loonies.
"Why you litte...", right before he said shit, 25 machine Gun bullets seperated Nomad from beating from beating Trilby to a pulp.
As they looked out the cell, they saw their capturer with Trilby unbrella in her left, and a big chest hanging from her right.
"Nice Umbrella, how do you reload it?"
"Come in this cell and I'll show you by sticking it up your ass winch"!!! Said Nomad.
"Please, If I went in there, I could make you eat your own shit with one hand behind my back, but I'm not. No, my employer wants me to ask you fools to join him is a mish, to break "X" out". Join him, and the rewards will be great." She then places the chest down and opens it, revealing emeralds, rubys, diamonds, and more rubys as big as a babies head.
"Hehe, you honesty think that we can be bought over by that bull-shit?" Asked Nomad.
"Yeah! Not even Trilby would join you!!! And he's a dirty art theif! Said Chris, laughing and turing towards Trilby. Trilby then pucnhes Chris in the face an puts his right hand on his chin in a thinkig position.
"Hmmm, gems, getting my Umbrella back,freedom,a mission, my god, its like you know me. I'm in".
"Good, because if you did'nt, I'd have to hurt you, like these bots are about to hurt you friends".
She then presses one of the many black and red buttons on her right arm, causing two trap doors on either side of the cell to pen up, reavealing 2 Twelve foot tall machines who then walked up to the cell, let Trilby out, and then let themselves inside the cell, staring down at Chris, in his brown jacket with a blue shirt underneath, and Nomad in his desert tunic. As trilby stands beside X-2, X-2 says: I call them the "cherry pickers".
"Why?" Asked Chris The robots then put their humongus arms into the under wear of both Chris and Nomad, and plucked two pubic hairs each. As they fell down in pain, Nomad said: 'Of course"!
Trilby and the captor walked away. "My Umbrella, please". Said Trilby to his fromer captor, who hands it over. "So where are we exactly, Ms....
"X-2. Said X-2. And to amswer your question, we're in a ship.
"What ocean? The Atlantic, Pacific, Antarctic..."
Actually we're in high orbit above "The Moon".
They came to a blast door, she activates it, as Trilby gets a confused look on his face.
As it opens, he sees a command center, where workersand engineers were working like bees, and beyond that was a view of earth from space, blocked partiallly by the view of the moon.
"Wow. Whos your emplyer"?
Back at Ft.Lauderdale...
"Stupid monkey!" Said Croc, as Jahleel and Cuban Guy surfeaced(with bryan still in his arms).
"Speaking of monkeys mon" said Jahleel, pointing at the monkey coming at them at 20 knots.
"Go and headbutt him Crocodilo! Your species was made for the water!" Said Cuban Guy.
"Hey, I find that offensive! Im not a Croc from your world! I'm bipedal for my many gods sake!
"Fine, just go and get 'em gringo!Said Cuban Guy.
"Thats another thing, why do you keep calling me an insult intended for the whiter of your species! I'm not human! I have green and scaly skin!
"Alright Croc, I'm sorry, now go and drown that mother fucker before he drowns us...
Before he can finish, the "Monkey Man" pulled him down, and starts strangling him with its tale.
"Hold on mon, were coming! Said Jahleel as he and croc dived down. As they went down, Jahleel regenerated ythe parts of his armor that had cracked from accidently being bitten by croc.
Jahleel, grabbed Cuban Guy, trying to pull him from the monkeys tail. The monkey, howver, was stronger, and continued pulling down Cuban Guy and strangling him. Croc, in a move of desperation, bit the monkey in the ass, amking it let go and scream in pain,until it wasted so much of its breath it started to drown, and shitted on "Croc" in order to break free.
Croc, however held on, even with shit in his mouth, until the monkey blacked out. After it did that. Croc let go and swam to the surface.
After they surfaced, Cuban Guy started coughing and spitting out water, while slurring: "Wheres Bruan?"
As they looked around, Colonel Simmion barfs on them from the cat walk. As Cuban Guy, Jahleel, and Croc barfed from the sight and smell of partiaally digested bannanas and tequila, the final final member of "The Atomically Powered Monkey Men" (who was hinding in the cnal in a wet suit)"Corperal S.pider, surfaced from the water and fired a torpedo at them, holding on to Bryan, who he had stolen.
Jahleel, hearing the beeping, put his hands on Cuban Guy and Croc, and channeled his thick armor unto them.As the torpedo hit, they survived, but the shockwavw sent them winding down the canal.
As the wave sent him down, Cuban Guy saw all three monkey men with Bryan on the catwalk, laughing their little monkey laugh.