The weirdest thing that you've ever done?

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What would you say is the weirdest thing you've ever done in your life?

I'll start, back in Kindergarten, I jammed a bean deep in my ear. I needed a hospital visit to get the damn thing removed, luckily it didn't require any process that caused scarring.

I stuck a sticker up my nose when I was in the 3rd grade. It never came out.

It's a tough choice between that time I threw oranges at a burglar, and that time I whipped a stranger who was dressed in a father christmas outfit, in a pub.

Hey, you asked.

There was a bus full of dignitaries (Town mayors, city council members, aldermen, city managers...) from several different parts of the U.K. visiting my hometown (in the U.S.) Some kind of fact finding/sister city/business opportunity scouting trip. They had lunch one day in the food court of one of the local malls. That food court had a jukebox. I put a $20 into it and selected Zombie by The Cranberries. Over and over, until the $20 was used up. And then calmly walked out, making it to the door about the same time the song started for the second time. A friend who worked at the food court told me later they were too polite to unplug it or ask for it to be shut off, but they did ask for it to be turned down.

It was just a whim, at the time I was a security guard at that mall and had just finished an early shift.

Pepsi-marinated fish sticks and fried pea soup. Also jerked off on a trampoline (not while jumping).

I got kicked out of Barnes & Noble once halfway through trying to move all the bible related stuff to the fiction section.

Mushrooms?

I was once talked into making a Twitter account. Absolutely disgusting. Once I sobered up I deleted the damn thing.

You develop some pretty weird habits living alone 24/7 for years and years. Lazy habits. Like using a cup for purposes other than drinking. And finding new uses for shower drains. I also spend a lot of time naked.

Is it a sex thing? My brain immediately went to a sex thing...

I'll second the living alone habits thing, I lived alone for about two years and now I have a girl who stays over for the weekend, and there's tons of little weird things I have to force myself to stop doing. Mainly peeing with the bathroom door opened, I've had to lean over and shut the door mid-pee-stream twice now because I forgot she was still in the apartment

edit: this was supposed to be quoting Ezekiel

DrownedAmmet:
Is it a sex thing? My brain immediately went to a sex thing...

I'll second the living alone habits thing, I lived alone for about two years and now I have a girl who stays over for the weekend, and there's tons of little weird things I have to force myself to stop doing. Mainly peeing with the bathroom door opened, I've had to lean over and shut the door mid-pee-stream twice now because I forgot she was still in the apartment

edit: this was supposed to be quoting Ezekiel

Lel, that qualifies as weird? Nevermind leaving the door open, I've taken leaks with girlfriends inside the bathroom, none of them ever complained.

Maybe they're all talking about what a weird fuck I am now.

RiseOfTheWhiteWolf:

DrownedAmmet:
Is it a sex thing? My brain immediately went to a sex thing...

I'll second the living alone habits thing, I lived alone for about two years and now I have a girl who stays over for the weekend, and there's tons of little weird things I have to force myself to stop doing. Mainly peeing with the bathroom door opened, I've had to lean over and shut the door mid-pee-stream twice now because I forgot she was still in the apartment

edit: this was supposed to be quoting Ezekiel

Lel, that qualifies as weird? Nevermind leaving the door open, I've taken leaks with girlfriends inside the bathroom, none of them ever complained.

Maybe they're all talking about what a weird fuck I am now.

Huh, to me that's fine, I've done that in the past. Maybe because the way my place is laid out the toilet is a straight shot view down the hallway into the living room, so leaving the door open seems like I'm inviting her to marvel at the might of my mighty peeing penis

I stapled my own thumb once. Look, the thing was stuck and I stupidly thought I could fix it from the bottom... yeah, pretty dumb.

Also I spend as much time as I can naked. Just because.

On one of the first days of school in my first year at university I got off the elevator and heard the guy behind me snicker to himself and mutter, "Faggot." So I found out which room he lived in and every Thursday for around a month, I peed on his door.

CrazyGirl17:

Also I spend as much time as I can naked. Just because.

Who doesn't?

McElroy:
Also jerked off on a trampoline (not while jumping).

Having been jumping is the only thing that makes that worthy of mention.

McElroy:
Also jerked off on a trampoline (not while jumping).

Are we telling masturbation stories now?

I was driving from Texas to Pennsylvania and wanked while going 70mph down the highway at 4am to keep myself awake.

In early high school there was this table of guys who would always call my friend a fag, because being gay was "icky" to teenagers at the time. He wasn't gay. Just has long hair. We got kind of tired of it though, so we sat at their table and made out in front of them. It was an odd friendship we had. Can't recall ever hearing much from those guys after that point though.

maninahat:
I threw oranges at a burglar, and that time I whipped a stranger who was dressed in a father christmas outfit, in a pub.

go on....

Silentpony:
I was once talked into making a Twitter account. Absolutely disgusting. Once I sobered up I deleted the damn thing.

Dear Lord, such horror, what kind of monster would do that?, lol

DeliveryGodNoah:
In early high school there was this table of guys who would always call my friend a fag, because being gay was "icky" to teenagers at the time. He wasn't gay. Just has long hair. We got kind of tired of it though, so we sat at their table and made out in front of them. It was an odd friendship we had. Can't recall ever hearing much from those guys after that point though.

I dunno about it being odd, sounds like your friendship had a lot of benefits.

Finished tech school, got a diploma for becoming an electronic engineering technologist, immediately became English-teaching missionary.

Haven't regretted it so far.

Cycloptomese:
I got kicked out of Barnes & Noble once halfway through trying to move all the bible related stuff to the fiction section.

Quick question - why do people do this? What motivates it?

I mean, I'd never start hauling all the new-age Chakra locating books to the fiction section, and I've probably got a stronger what-absolute-bosh opinion on those than you do of Christianity.

lacktheknack:

Cycloptomese:
I got kicked out of Barnes & Noble once halfway through trying to move all the bible related stuff to the fiction section.

Quick question - why do people do this? What motivates it?

I'm pretty sure you know why.

Saying yes to being one of the spambot moderators. I don't deal with users in the moderation queue but I get grilled as if I'm capable of overruling the decisions other mods make. So I get to be a target without the power! Yay! :D

DarklordKyo:

maninahat:
I threw oranges at a burglar, and that time I whipped a stranger who was dressed in a father christmas outfit, in a pub.

go on....

Ronseal?

I caught the burglar trying to break in through the window of the flat below, and the only ammunition I had to ward him off was a bag of clementines. It was enough though. In the case of the latter, the woman was dressed as father christmas because it was around christmas time, we're not insane.

lacktheknack:

Cycloptomese:
I got kicked out of Barnes & Noble once halfway through trying to move all the bible related stuff to the fiction section.

Quick question - why do people do this? What motivates it?

I mean, I'd never start hauling all the new-age Chakra locating books to the fiction section, and I've probably got a stronger what-absolute-bosh opinion on those than you do of Christianity.

I can't answer for anyone else, obviously. For me, it was mostly mischief. Also, it was like ten years ago and I was a lot younger and dumber.

I'm not actually athiest and I'm not religious either. If you ask me, both groups are selling something and I'd like them all to stay off my porch.

I once yelled at a mannequin for thinking it was better than me just because it had a hat and I didn't.

To be fair I was out in public with a friend and he wasn't embarrassed yet so I had to rectify that. He had to drag me away from the store window whilst I was still yelling at the mannequin.

I should go back to that store at some point and let the mannequin know I have my own hat now, that'll show it who is better than whom.

Bobular:
I once yelled at a mannequin for thinking it was better than me just because it had a hat and I didn't.

To be fair I was out in public with a friend and he wasn't embarrassed yet so I had to rectify that. He had to drag me away from the store window whilst I was still yelling at the mannequin.

I should go back to that store at some point and let the mannequin know I have my own hat now, that'll show it who is better than whom.

until you come back and now the mannequin is wearing two hats

DrownedAmmet:

Bobular:
I once yelled at a mannequin for thinking it was better than me just because it had a hat and I didn't.

To be fair I was out in public with a friend and he wasn't embarrassed yet so I had to rectify that. He had to drag me away from the store window whilst I was still yelling at the mannequin.

I should go back to that store at some point and let the mannequin know I have my own hat now, that'll show it who is better than whom.

until you come back and now the mannequin is wearing two hats

It better not, or my friend would never live it down what with the tirade I'd yell at it. Woh be to any mannequin wearing two hats like some fancy arse rich git who never had to work for their hat but instead just swims in hats all day long thinking that hats rain down from the skies unto those undeserving of true hattitude on the grounds of them being a fucking mannequin.

Bobular:

DrownedAmmet:

Bobular:
I once yelled at a mannequin for thinking it was better than me just because it had a hat and I didn't.

To be fair I was out in public with a friend and he wasn't embarrassed yet so I had to rectify that. He had to drag me away from the store window whilst I was still yelling at the mannequin.

I should go back to that store at some point and let the mannequin know I have my own hat now, that'll show it who is better than whom.

until you come back and now the mannequin is wearing two hats

It better not, or my friend would never live it down what with the tirade I'd yell at it. Woh be to any mannequin wearing two hats like some fancy arse rich git who never had to work for their hat but instead just swims in hats all day long thinking that hats rain down from the skies unto those undeserving of true hattitude on the grounds of them being a fucking mannequin.

Ugh, you hat anarchists are all the same. The mannequins are but a subjugated race used by the hat bourgeois to give the hat proletariat a scapegoat to rally against
We will never know true hat freedom until the hatless peasant and the behatted mannequin rise up as comrades and finally take down the true enemy of the people!
... which is the guy who runs the Lids kiosk at the mall, I guess?

DarklordKyo:
What would you say is the weirdest thing you've ever done in your life?

I'll start, back in Kindergarten, I jammed a bean deep in my ear. I needed a hospital visit to get the damn thing removed, luckily it didn't require any process that caused scarring.

Thats nothing. Im winning this bitch!

I once dug through a skip, opening rubbish bags, to find a used vibrator.

Checkmate mother fuckers!

bjj hero:

I once dug through a skip, opening rubbish bags, to find a used vibrator.

Did you know there was one in there, or were you just feeling lucky?

DrownedAmmet:

RiseOfTheWhiteWolf:

DrownedAmmet:
Is it a sex thing? My brain immediately went to a sex thing...

I'll second the living alone habits thing, I lived alone for about two years and now I have a girl who stays over for the weekend, and there's tons of little weird things I have to force myself to stop doing. Mainly peeing with the bathroom door opened, I've had to lean over and shut the door mid-pee-stream twice now because I forgot she was still in the apartment

edit: this was supposed to be quoting Ezekiel

Lel, that qualifies as weird? Nevermind leaving the door open, I've taken leaks with girlfriends inside the bathroom, none of them ever complained.

Maybe they're all talking about what a weird fuck I am now.

Huh, to me that's fine, I've done that in the past. Maybe because the way my place is laid out the toilet is a straight shot view down the hallway into the living room, so leaving the door open seems like I'm inviting her to marvel at the might of my mighty peeing penis

Me and the girlfriend tend to keep our bodily functions (other than the fun ones) to ourselves, but we were in Vegas a couple weeks ago and I had to pee while she was about to get in the shower. I asked for a moment to go ahead and drain the dragon but she actually came over to stake a look because she "had never seen how it works" for guys. Obviously she understood the mechanics- I think she was just having some penis envy from how easy it is for me.

OT: A number of years ago I was driving home from college and was stuck in gridlock traffic. For some reason I got really horny and decided to just jerk off in my car. I'm sure I've done plenty of other weird things but that immediately jumps out at me.

Baffle2:

Did you know there was one in there, or were you just feeling lucky?

It was needed for evidence, so I was more "hoping" it was in there and could be found.

Paid money to watch Uwe Boll movies in cinema.

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