25 Things a Perfect Guy Would Do

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Lizmichi:
Here's what a real women thinks of this list and not some hormonally 14 year old girl high on pixie sticks and boys.
1. Know how to make you smile when you are down. (Ummm everyone that cares about me should do that.)
2. Try to secretly smell your hair, but you always
notice. (That's a good way to get an ass kicked.)
3. Stick up for you, but still respects your
independence. (Please I can stick up for my self just fine but if I NEED him he'll chew them a new ass)
4. Give you the remote control during the game. (Fuck that. I can just go to the other room with a TV and watch what I want.)
5. Come up behind you and put his arms around you. (Ok I'll just hurt my fiance for that. Please I've been in karate for years and could really hurt him if he did that.)
6. Play with your hair. (Well that's good but only during cuddling.)
7. His hands always find yours. (It's my hand no his)
8. Be cute when he really wants something. (Ok any guy that acts cute is ether too girly or wants sex.)
9. Offer you plenty of massages. (Please I just need to ask for one.)
10. Dance with you, even if he feels like a dork. (I don't dance ether so meh on that crap.)
11. Never run out of love. (Love is tangible and needs to be refilled?)
12. Be funny, but know how to be serious. (If someone can't tell when to be serious they need to be shot.)
13. Realize he's being funny when he needs to be
serious. (See 12.)
14. Be patient when you take forever to get ready. (I don't take for ever to get ready and I believe in time management. Wow a 14 year old did write this.)
15. React so cutely when you hit him and it actually
hurts. (Ummm have you see an abused person act cutely when they get beat?)
16. Smile a lot. (Someones high on Prozac because no one is that happy; besides I can read peoples feels very well.)
17. Plans a romantic date full of cheesy things he
wouldn't normally like to do, just because he knows it
means a lot to you. (Ok I don't like cheesy shit like that.)
18. Appreciate you. (So thank you isn't good enough?)
19. Help others out. (So helping me out doesn't matter?)
20. Drive 5 hours just to see you for 1. (Well mine drives 13 hours for me so take that.)
21. Always gives you a peck on the cheek when you
depart from each others company, even when his friends
are watching. (PDA much.)
22. Sing, even if he can't. (OH GOD. *shivers thinking about her fiance singing*)
23. Have a creative sense of humor. (If he makes me laugh that's good enough. He doesn't need a ton of jokes.)
24. Stare at you. (Please don't eat my face.)
25. Call for no reason. (Mine doesn't call but I still think he's perfect.)
26. Quit smoking, chewing, drinking, or drugs - just
because he loves u that much to quit it. (I'm not his mom.)

aww shit.... Why do I do things like this

Glefistus:
This is the most naiive list I've ever seen. Somebody should post 25 things a perfect woman would do to counter

1-23 would be have sex w/ me
24 be hot
25 would be like play video games

[/sexist, misogynistic comment]

sabaducia:

Xero Scythe:

sabaducia:

Xero Scythe:

9: realize that we must be judged to a different standard.

Explain further.
If you mean: "Don't compare me to Edward Cullen" - I totally agree with you.
If you mean something else... please explain it more.

sorry for the quad post, but how are you being compared? you're a girl! maybe Rosalie or Lucy

my friend told me it was a good book. i realized it was crap from the 3rd page or so, but in the vain hope it would get better, i read on. that is the last time i take a book recommedation from her.

Firstly I was loling at teh original post of 25. Yours is pretty good for a minute job.
I agree that guys shouldn't be compared to Edward. It drives me insane. Mainly because he's everything you SHOULDN'T want (emotionally abusive and manipulative not to mention UNREALISTIC).
And when you say your friend recommended a book, was it Twilight or The Rules (although they are much and the same to my mind).

she had recommended twilight.

My boyfriend and I fight over the remote, food, how to do horde mode in GOW2, spoon ice cream down each other's throats, comfort each other over bad results or fights with the parents, give massages on BOTH end, spend quality time together perving on women, live at my house cause his parents are scary, do IT when the other wants, not just when you want, spend most of shopping time in GAME or HMV and share gaming mags.

And I would not have it ANY other way.

For both sides of the sexes, have realistic standards, cause from going out with both girls and guys, "perfect" will never come in reach until you give someone a fucking chance.

Goes mainly for stuck up bitches who won't so much as hang out with a guy unless he looks like Brad Pitt.

Let's give this guy thing a shot:

# Who gives a shit: Sex. Now. Later. Don't care if it hurts; don't care if you don't want to; sex. NOW.

# Next one after whatever was before:

Get me a beer. Now. No I don't CARE that you're bleeding from the sex; BEEER. NOW.

Did I do this right, guys?

((and are there any guys out there, any at all, that aren't like this, and are straight, single and go for quiet nonslutty chicks?))

Sindaine:
Let's give this guy thing a shot:

# Who gives a shit: Sex. Now. Later. Don't care if it hurts; don't care if you don't want to; sex. NOW.

# Next one after whatever was before:

Get me a beer. Now. No I don't CARE that you're bleeding from the sex; BEEER. NOW.

Did I do this right, guys?

((and are there any guys out there, any at all, that aren't like this, and are straight, single and go for quiet nonslutty chicks?))

You my friend are a true man and an inspiration to us all. *Wipes away tear of pride*
Hell you do not even care if she gets blood on your carpet while getting you a beer. The sign of a true hero.

I'm sorry but this is the biggest heap of shit I have ever seen in my entire life. This woman doesn't want a man, she wants a fucking doormat. I've got a fifty on the fact that this woman will die a spinster. Any takers?

I mean christ, any guy who does all of those is a spineless goon and they'd get sick of him pretty quickly for being a smothering nancy. The fact is women do not want a guy like this, they just aren't attracted to them. Guy's like this are pushovers, they're not alpha males. Attraction is not something people can control, it's all on sub-concious level, and spinless tits like this are not attractive in that way.

It still works on a very primitive basis, and most of it revolves around these alpha qualities. Assertiveness, confidence, physical size. If a guy shows a lack of interest in a girl that always turns heads, it makes the girl question her own value because someone, for once, has chosen not to give her attention. She then seeks to gain acknowledgement from an apparently superior individual.

I don't want to sound like a dick but when it comes to nice guys, women get in their own way of finding them, because they dismiss a guy who fails the very first shit test; which is to pay them attention on the first encounter.

I'm not saying this is universally how it works, and it's certainly not this black and white, but for the alarming majority of cases, this is how primary attractions evolve.

Sad, but true. One of our more debilitating primal characteristics frankly.

0.0 I'm a woman. That was meant to be parody.

I'mma go cry nao; nobody rape me while I cry please?

Old Trailmix:

crudus:
2. The remote and couch are ours on game days.

FUCK THE GAME!

I LOST THE GAME

Does anyone know who actually wrote this? I mean for this many comments, you'd think it would be some sort of influential person, but my guess is it was some random girl that thinks the world owes her a slave-boy. This is one of the most rediculous lists I have ever seen, but I'm not suprised by it, and as some before me have said...it looks like somone read a little too much Twilight(or other generic, poorly written romance novel).

...I can compromise a better list in less than 25 terrible comments.

1. Leaves me the frick alone when I want to be left alone.
2. Has nice, soft, nice-smelling hair. I... like head hair.
3. Plays video games.
4. Isn't so incredibly needy.
5. Is a loveable dork.

...Yep... That's a good guy right there. ^

God, this is the last thing I need, I'm really trying to stick by my point that generalization is completely idiotic, and when I find shit like this on the net that reinforces the worst parts of female stereotypes it doesn't help in the slightest

And for the record that's not loving, it's masochistic (especially 15)

I'm half tempted to my my own list of things a guy should have and post it here. With no god damn pussy ass things. If I hit someone they shouldn't act cute.

Sindaine:
Let's give this guy thing a shot:

# Who gives a shit: Sex. Now. Later. Don't care if it hurts; don't care if you don't want to; sex. NOW.

# Next one after whatever was before:

Get me a beer. Now. No I don't CARE that you're bleeding from the sex; BEEER. NOW.

Did I do this right, guys?

((and are there any guys out there, any at all, that aren't like this, and are straight, single and go for quiet nonslutty chicks?))

Theirs me (I'm 14), and about every other guy I know and haven't beat the shit out of at some time or another

For the record (depending on which offensive stereotype you were portraying) you did very well :) (no offense meant)

Number 8 reminds me of my bf...but he fails miserably though.

That's such a dumb list

And it's dumb for both genders.

It's dumb to expect that of guys and for guys to be pressured into doing things like that-- because they saw it on Myspace and think that girls actually like that kind of thing.

But it's even dumber on girls because then it makes us look like a bunch of self obsessed, moaning, whine bags with too high expectations.

I'm not reading 8 pages worth of text, but am I the only one who's noticed that in a list of 25 things a perfect guy would do there are 26 things? Seriously?

T3h Camp3r T3rr0r1st:

[/sexist, misogynistic comment]

Dude, you've got the Duke as your avatar; no apology required :D

1. Know how to make you smile when you are down.

*Erm, yeah, that's a basic point of a relationship

2. Try to secretly smell your hair, but you always
notice.

*I guess that chick I was stalking should reconsider me then.

3. Stick up for you, but still respects your
independence.

* Yeah, right. I'll be your knight in shining armour, until you want to go shopping with my credit card.

4. Give you the remote control during the game.

* If the 'Game' in question is Call of Duty 2, then I can just give you one of the other controllers, and we can play split-screen.

5. Come up behind you and put his arms around you.

* Meh, Frontal hugs are more fun

6. Play with your hair.

* depends on how you define 'hair', and 'play', and 'pubic region'.

7. His hands always find yours.

* Always a valuable skill during a blackout or flood

8. Be cute when he really wants something.

* Like the 'I really need to go to the toilet dance'? or perhaps 'I've sliced my hand open and need to drive to the hospital crabwalk'?

9. Offer you plenty of massages.

* man, there seems to be a lot of unresolved sexual tension in this list, also, define 'pubic region' again.

10. Dance with you, even if he feels like a dork.

* No. I'll dance by myself to feel like a dork.

11. Never run out of love.

* Bwah? Out of love = End of relationship. so what they're really saying is "Never break up with you". Clingy bitches.

12. Be funny, but know how to be serious.

* "Don't make jokes at my mother's funeral" "Don't call me fat in his wedding speech"

13. Realize he's being funny when he needs to be serious.

* I call that my "My girlfreind just drove a four-inch stiletto through the fleshy part of my foot"

14. Be patient when you take forever to get ready.

* It's all going to come off at the end of the night one way or another. Fuck that

15. React so cutely when you hit him and it actually hurts.

* Also fuck that. You hit me and I hit you back. If you are able to hit me hard enough that you can actually hurt me, you can take a retaliatory beating just fine

16. Smile a lot.

* Does shadenfreude count?

17. Plans a romantic date full of cheesy things he wouldn't normally like to do, just because he knows it means a lot to you.

* Yeah, okay, You'd just better not complain when the next time we step out we go to an Arcade and play back-to-back rounds of Point Blank.

18. Appreciate you.

* And your relationship is built on...?

19. Help others out.

* Okay

20. Drive 5 hours just to see you for 1.

* What the hell? I drive five hours just to see you, and you can't even stick around for more than a lousy 60 minutes? Just what the hell kind of boyfreind do you think I am? Unless you're late for your poledancing and mud wrestling classes, I think I deserve a bit more than just the time of day and an empty tank of petrol.

21. Always gives you a peck on the cheek when you depart from each others company, even when his friends are watching.

* Meh, more standard relationship stuff.

22. Sing, even if he can't.

* This seems like less of an endearing trait than something that would a) get old quickly, and b) end a perfectly good relationship

23. Have a creative sense of humor.

* Say that again after I've rigged your toilet to explode

24. Stare at you.

* I should REALLY send this to that chick that pulled that restraining order on me. Or perhaps spraypaint it onto her house, or read it into her ear after breaking into her house, or carve it into my belly and then flash her on the train.

25. Call for no reason.

* At 3 AM before your final exams? Sure!

26. Quit smoking, chewing, drinking, or drugs - just because he loves u that much to quit it.

* Unless it's causing a huge rift in the relationship, fuck off.v

Actually, I'm in line with an extraordinary amount of these. Which brings me to my next statement:

This list is what girl THINK they want, not what they really want.

The 10 Ten things girls REALLY want list is like this (written as though I'm a girl):

1. Make me laugh when I want to, but must know when I'm too moody for it.
2. Touch me when I want it, but must know when I'm too moody for it.
3. Must make enough money for me to brag to my friends about it.
4. Good looks are more important than I say (or think) they are.
5. Flawless manners just make me think you're a geek.
6. Must think my friends are more important than his friends.
7. Where I want to go is more important than where HE wants to go.
8. Must be willing to listen to me complain about it when he finally goes where HE wants to go.
9. Must always take my calls, but be patient when I don't return HIS calls.
10. Doing anything romantic will not be appreciated if I'm not in the mood.

And yes, this is from personal experience.

Sindaine:
0.0 I'm a woman. That was meant to be parody.

I'mma go cry nao; nobody rape me while I cry please?

You were being overly sarcastic, and I'm guessing so was he/she. ^^

Have a good cry, everyone needs to vent sometime.

As for my own response to "the list": I actually match a good number of those things on the list (roughly half), guess that's why I usually end up as a friend rather than a love interest, or boring them away from me.

Alone it is then, doubt I'll find someone who accepts the real me, especially since it takes months for me to open up.
Ah well, I'll live, I miss the affection though, but I am who I am, not going to pretend.

MaxTheReaper:
I agree with Maddox.
And once I find the article, I will link it.

EDIT: http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=26_things

Anyway, I don't have any inherent problem with acting "cute" or "romantic" or any of that, but this is still stupid.

Really?
"The game?"
Fuck sports.
There is nothing in the world that would make me sit down to watch "the game."
Not even having both my legs and arms amputated.
I would crawl to the TV to shut it off with my face.

EDIT2: I actually feel like responding to this as some others have.

1. Know how to make you smile when you are down.

Well, not to be modest, but I am fucking hilarious. Ladies love teh humorz.

I love this, lol know i'm so late to the punch its awkward but this is why you look at old posts :D
2. Try to secretly smell your hair, but you always
notice.

That's a little weird...and it's not really something the guy can do alone, is it? Unless the lady has some sort of olfactory alarm, how is this supposed to work?

3. Stick up for you, but still respects your
independence.

Couldn't I respect her independence by letting her solve her own problems?

4. Give you the remote control during the game.

I can only repeat my utter hatred of sports.

5. Come up behind you and put his arms around you.

I do that to friends, too.

6. Play with your hair.

Gah no. I hate having sticky shit on my hands, and hairspray definitely counts.

7. His hands always find yours.

Always?

8. Be cute when he really wants something.

Whatever happened to "getting it myself?"

9. Offer you plenty of massages.

Am I a massage therapist now?

10. Dance with you, even if he feels like a dork.

Fuck dancing. Dancing is silly as hell.

11. Never run out of love.

...Okay.

12. Be funny, but know how to be serious.

This I have down to an artform.

13. Realize he's being funny when he needs to be
serious.

Also this. But realizing I'm doing it doesn't mean I'm going to stop.

14. Be patient when you take forever to get ready.

Whatever. I probably take longer to get dressed than most ladies.

15. React so cutely when you hit him and it actually
hurts.

There is this thing, it is called "domestic abuse." I wonder if you have ever heard of it?

16. Smile a lot.

Smiling hurts my face.

17. Plans a romantic date full of cheesy things he
wouldn't normally like to do, just because he knows it
means a lot to you.

I love cheesy romantic shit! I am all about cheesy romantic shit. Why do I feel like I'm being stereotyped here?

18. Appreciate you.

O...kay...

19. Help others out.

Do I look like Jesus to you? Helping people only makes them dependent on you.

20. Drive 5 hours just to see you for 1.

Or buy a day planner?

21. Always gives you a peck on the cheek when you
depart from each others company, even when his friends
are watching.

Why would a bunch of ladies care if I kiss another lady?

22. Sing, even if he can't.

Easy enough.

23. Have a creative sense of humor.

I'm "creative" the way serial killers are "interesting." ...Ladies.

24. Stare at you.

Staring is hard.

25. Call for no reason.

Nothing says "romantic" like sitting awkwardly on the phone because you have nothing to say.

26. Quit smoking, chewing, drinking, or drugs - just
because he loves u that much to quit it.

What's up with the weird lapse into text speak here?
Also, no. There is also this thing called "compromise."
Just because someone has ovaries doesn't mean they get to be in control of everyone.
Who the fuck am I kidding - of course it does.
Girls can hit really hard!

This list is soooo horribly subjective. The person who wrote this needs to get reacquianted with the real world...

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