The Escapist's Friend and Family Help Thread

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Hello escapists. As you probably know, almost a year ago a user called BonsaiK made the Relationship problem thread. It was made to stop clutter, as a lot of people were making threads about their problems, and to make one easy-to-find place for advice. I noticed that a lot of members have been making threads about problems with parents and family in general. so I decided to follow in Bonsaik's footsteps and make this thread. I also noticed the occasional thread about problems with friends and I thought that I might as well put the two together.

However, unlike the relationship thread it will not just be one person solving all your problems. Just as how any user can ask for help, any user can give help too. I understand that there may be problems with this, after all not everyone has good advice, but I think that on the whole it would be a good thing. They do say that two heads are better than one.

This does mean that you can't PM to be anonymous. Because anyone can give advice it will be hard to ask just one person and keep your privacy. So if any users would like to take extra interest in this, and don't mind getting PMs asking for advice please let me know and I will add you to the below list.

I've taken Furburt's advice and created a user group to go with the thread. It can be found here.

Well this will be good for members who need help, while reducing all those relationship threads.

Hope this will help some users out there.

This wont work, a better but more time consuming solution would be to just create a group dedicated to said thing.

Ohh, I'd love to help. :) Just look at how caring I am! ;D

xmetatr0nx:
This wont work, a better but more time consuming solution would be to just create a group dedicated to said thing.

Yeah, that's probably a better idea. It worked well for the Computer Help group.

OP: I have no problems with my friends and family, so sadly, I cannot contribute nor am I experienced enough to hand out reliable advice.

However, I wish you the best of luck.

xmetatr0nx:
This wont work, a better but more time consuming solution would be to just create a group dedicated to said thing.

No, it probably won't work but you never know these things. Look at the relationship thread.

mikecoulter:
Ohh, I'd love to help. :) Just look at how caring I am! ;D

Should I put you down for being ok with being PM'd or do you just want to help normally.

Freebird.:

xmetatr0nx:
This wont work, a better but more time consuming solution would be to just create a group dedicated to said thing.

No, it probably won't work but you never know these things. Look at the relationship thread.

mikecoulter:
Ohh, I'd love to help. :) Just look at how caring I am! ;D

Should I put you down for being ok with being PM'd or do you just want to help normally.

Yeah sure, people can contact me however they want. Wouldn't be here otherwise. :)

Nice idea!
But If someone is dating his sister where will that go? relationship or Friend and Family?

mikecoulter:
Snip.

Great, I'll put you down for that.

Furburt:
Snip.

I think that if it was in User Groups a lot of people wouldn't see it. A lot of people do go to user groups but they aren't as active as the forums. I just want more people to see it so we'll get less repeated threads.

Freebird.:
*super snip*

I find this would be a great idea, if you need some help, just tell me

Freebird.:
I think that if it was in User Groups a lot of people wouldn't see it. A lot of people do go to user groups but they aren't as active as the forums. I just want more people to see it so we'll get less repeated threads.

Perhaps make a user group to complement it and put a link here?

Sleekgiant:

Freebird.:
*super snip*

I find this would be a great idea, if you need some help, just tell me

Great. Are you ok with people contacting you or are you helping regularly?

And on an off topic note, I've never been happier to see someone's avatar. The bear is back, baby!

Freebird.:

Sleekgiant:

Freebird.:
*super snip*

I find this would be a great idea, if you need some help, just tell me

Great. Are you ok with people contacting you or are you helping regularly?

And on an off topic note, I've never been happier to see someone's avatar. The bear is back, baby!

Add me to the contact list, I'm on frequently and would love to give advice. I will bookmark your thread.....Now

I'd rather ruin the lives of people I know, otherwise I'll never see the tears.

Screw it, I'll give it a shot, sign me up.

I'll give it a try, even if there will be a lot of "Um, well".

TheNumber1Zero:
Screw it, I'll give it a shot, sign me up.

UnableToThinkOfName:
I'll give it a try, even if there will be a lot of "Um, well".

Contactable or helping regularly?

Furburt:

Freebird.:
I think that if it was in User Groups a lot of people wouldn't see it. A lot of people do go to user groups but they aren't as active as the forums. I just want more people to see it so we'll get less repeated threads.

Perhaps make a user group to complement it and put a link here?

I've taken this advice. There is now a link to the group in the original post.

Freebird.:
Contactable or helping regularly?

Contactable, but no promises.

Freebird.:
I've taken this advice. There is now a link to the group in the original post.

Oh good. I'd join, but as I said, I don't think I'd be much help. However, I'll share it with people I do think would help.

TheNumber1Zero:

Freebird.:
Contactable or helping regularly?

Contactable, but no promises.

I'll put you on the list.

Furburt:

Freebird.:
I've taken this advice. There is now a link to the group in the original post.

Oh good. I'd join, but as I said, I don't think I'd be much help. However, I'll share it with people I do think would help.

That's great. Any help is good help especially spreading the word.

An internet forum is the last place one should go for relationship / family advice. Just my two cents.

Freebird.:
I'll put you on the list.

I'm not good with people, so try to avoid using me unless everyone else is busy.

easy evil:
Nice idea!
But If someone is dating his sister where will that go? relationship or Friend and Family?

Depends if the sisters hot.
Jail most likely.

This comment shows exactly how helpful I would be to this thread, I'll just refer others here instead of help myself.

easy evil:
Nice idea!
But If someone is dating his sister where will that go? relationship or Friend and Family?

]Did you HAVE to ask that bizzare question?

Freebird.:
I'll put you on the list.

1 more thing, I will only be helping until you have a decent team behind you, ok?

Freebird.:

TheNumber1Zero:
Screw it, I'll give it a shot, sign me up.

UnableToThinkOfName:
I'll give it a try, even if there will be a lot of "Um, well".

Contactable or helping regularly?

Furburt:

Freebird.:
I think that if it was in User Groups a lot of people wouldn't see it. A lot of people do go to user groups but they aren't as active as the forums. I just want more people to see it so we'll get less repeated threads.

Perhaps make a user group to complement it and put a link here?

I've taken this advice. There is now a link to the group in the original post.

Contactable.

I would be more than happy to help people, unfortunately I;m one of those who offers terrible advice. Well, maybe not terrible, but certainly not very helpful.

Anywho, I have an issue that recently has become a sort of moral dilemma the likes of which a heartless bastard like me has no right to partake in, yet the situation finds me in the middle of it.

TheNumber1Zero:

Freebird.:
I'll put you on the list.

I'm not good with people, so try to avoid using me unless everyone else is busy.

I've put this in the original post.

TheNumber1Zero:

Freebird.:
I'll put you on the list.

1 more thing, I will only be helping until you have a decent team behind you, ok?

That's fine. I don't want more than five contactable people anyway so it's cool.

UnableToThinkOfName:

Contactable.

And speaking of which, that's our five. Thanks for helping, I'll put you on the list.

Lullabye:
Snip.

Try showing him some of the best things about living with parents, or the bad things about living on your own. Try not to look too good as that will give him more reason to want to move out. Don't make it obvious that you want him to stay put just subtly remind him why staying at home is better. If that fails, tell him he can move in but he has to pay his share. You may want to exaggerate the numbers a bit.

SextusMaximus:

easy evil:
Nice idea!
But If someone is dating his sister where will that go? relationship or Friend and Family?

]Did you HAVE to ask that bizzare question?

D4zZ:

easy evil:
Nice idea!
But If someone is dating his sister where will that go? relationship or Friend and Family?

Depends if the sisters hot.
Jail most likely.

This comment shows exactly how helpful I would be to this thread, I'll just refer others here instead of help myself.

Yes!
and I know someone who is dating one of his relatives cousin or something (I'm not sure I'm not close with the guy) so yeh.....

Lullabye:
I would be more than happy to help people, unfortunately I;m one of those who offers terrible advice. Well, maybe not terrible, but certainly not very helpful.

Anywho, I have an issue that recently has become a sort of moral dilemma the likes of which a heartless bastard like me has no right to partake in, yet the situation finds me in the middle of it.

You weren't kidding about the wall of text : P. But to be more serious you are correct, most parents can become quite annoying. I will have to say your friend and his mom need to sit down and have a talk. Set some ground rules for each other, especially since his Mom's stress level is probably through the roof. You need to tell him that moving out is not the answer and that would only make things worse between them. My home life is nowhere near perfect and I think about moving out everyday,BUT I don't, for I know I don't have the means to. You need to talk to him and ask him how would he survive, can he afford rent,groceries,bills,etc. That combined with him coming to terms with his mom should discourage him.

Sleekgiant:
*snip*

eh, tried the whole "you can't afford it" route, bu the thing is, he can. I'm sure if he wasn't so insecure, he could go out and get his own apartment or rent a room somewhere. But he's still immature and terribly shy so he wants to stay close with people he knows.

Freebird.:

Lullabye:
Snip.

Try showing him some of the best things about living with parents, or the bad things about living on your own. Try not to look too good as that will give him more reason to want to move out. Don't make it obvious that you want him to stay put just subtly remind him why staying at home is better. If that fails, tell him he can move in but he has to pay his share. You may want to exaggerate the numbers a bit.

Again, the whole numbers thing means nothing to him. But it's more that he's an unhelpful little ass and we don't have room in the house for another.(3 teenage girls, 3 adults, 2 teenage boys). The problem with me trying to play down my life, is that as soon as I moved out, I ranted on for months about how amazing it is to be free. So.....I kinda dug myself a hole there.
Plus the he really is a spiteful person, the type to hold grudges fro a long time. I'm not sure he can hold a civil conversation with someone he dislikes.
Actually, there's a perfect term to describe him.
Troll.

Sign me up i'm a true peoples person!

Lullabye:

Holy snip batman

One would wonder why you don't tell him to go find someone else to bother. If you aren't really friends and you dislike his attitude tell him it's not your problem.

My family is probably the most fecked out of all of them, And so i'd be more than happy to help for any issues, Relationship or family, Just let me know.

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