Should it be illegal to give kids stupid/horrendous names?

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Actually, in my country, there are plenty of kids' names that are illegal.
It was very normal to call your child "Bjørn" (It's my dad's name) some 30 years back, for example; but now, the government has decided that you can't name children after animals (Bjørn is the Norwegian word for bear, you see)

Personally, I think that's a bit silly. Naming children after animals was pretty common, so there should be no reason to ban that. I still think it's good that we have laws that keep parents from naming their kids "Peaceoshit" though.

Edit: Ok, here's what the law actually says.

You may not choose a name that will be a significant inconvenience to the bearer.

Now I think thats fair. I think it'd be hard for them to enforce and such, due to opinion (aside from obvious things), but sounds right.

Every parent has to register their child's name with the government within six months after birth.
Edit: Oh, wups. You said "due to opinion". My bad.

Fun fact: The law also states that any name that has been registered as being used as a last or middle name may not be used as a first name.
Say, for example that you're registered with the last name "Dicking". That means noone's allowed to use "Dicking" as their first name. (If I've interpreted it right that is. It might be that only names that have a tradition of being used as last names are illegal.)

The more you know.

Sgt. Sykes:
You know... Yeah.

I have a somewhat unusual name myself; the problem being it's too long, and with my surname being also long, it takes ages to introduce myself.

But unusual and stupid names, that's even worse. It's usually the stupid mothers' idea: Oh our kid is going to be so special, he has to have a special name! Bullshit. There are even studies saying that kids with usual names have it easier in life.

BTW in some Eastern European countries there are actual laws about names: Here, you can only give a name from a given list (several thousands names), so nothing like 'Moon' or whatever. It's possible to add a new name to the list, but it has to pass some requirements first.

Ah, I was beaten to the punch on the list thing. What do you think of my idea of the middle name (I actually don't know how many places use middle names) being the one the parents are (within reason, forbidding symbols, numbers, anything else that isn't a letter) allowed to fuck with? No one really uses their middle name in any documentation I've needed to sign.

...Although just in case, maybe a letter limit, like 10 letters, absolute maximum.

Illegal? Maybe not. Frowned upon? VERY. People will still do it, no matter how bad the names are.

I mean, 4 Real? SERIOUSLY?

Here, in Poland, it is disallowed to give your kids embarrassing, stupid, offensive etc. names. It's good, you can still give your child original name, but some weirdos (and they do exist) won't destroy someones life by naming him, for example, Dicktits.

Feck no. If I wanna name my child Chewbacca I'm naming my child Chewbacca! You just have to make sure that the people who name kids use some common sense.

Yes, the parents should be slapped over the head, HARD. With names like Banjo and Apple for the name of a child, should we as the supposed "responsible" adult just say "Not my problem now" when giving kids ridiculous names? **** NO. We have to do our best to make sure that not only the name is unique but it isn't something they can get easily teased for. If a name isn't a big deal than name your kid Brutus or Judas. If you don't think that a child's suffering is worth preventing that you can name your kid those 2 names with no fear at all. So many words I wanna use but could get banned to say to parents who give their kids such stupid names.

As much as I hate the idea of a kid being named something like Fluffy, Booboo or named after any Twilight character, I do unfortunately have to point out, who defines stupid or horrendous? Unless it's an offensive name, like the N word or whatever.

i dont think there's anything wrong with it, for example think of all the john's,mary's,bill's etc. you know

it gives some originality

ps. my first born son will be named vivi

I knew a kid named Jack Kenneth Goff. He should not have had to deal with everything he had to.

Just throwing this out there, but when I was working in an ER one night (I'm a paramedic, and we have to work there during our training), I was asked to go call a patient back. The patient was an 8 year old girl with her parents (who didn't look like a real set of winners). I looked at the patient's name, and now I may spell this wrong, but her name on the sheet was something like Phelonie. I called out Felona, because my mind couldn't process the stupidity of these people, but it was thrown in my face when they corrected me. "It's pronounced Felony." My reply? "I'm sure it is." These idiots named their child after a criminal offense. Was she named after the conditions of her conception or something? These two must hate that poor little girl.

Wouldn't the better place be to start with making a law against who can have kids? We have to get licenses to drive, to get married, to sell liquor, but not to have children. Not surprising that "unique" names happen.

Well, there was this one family who had 3 kids with the names "Adolf", "Heinrich" and "Aryan Nation". Dunno what happened to them though. Pretty cruel if you ask me, the poor kid can't defend himself, you give him that shitty name and ruin his life.


Courage Wolf Harper...dude...

mfG diebane

no? You can't ban things because someone thinks "it's stupid".

This is a terrible idea.

I don't think you should name a kid what you like. I think you should name them what they will probably like when they're older. And if that seems too much of a stretch, then for the love of God at least give them a chance. If you name your little boy Petal or something, he will not survive school (mentally anyway, they're unlikely to lynch him).




Actually, Jason Lee named his son Pilot Inspektor. Spelled wrong on purpose.
And Frank Zappa's other kid was named Dweezil Zappa. Not as bad as Moon Unit but still pretty bad.

Eh, I like some of the odd names. Not uber-weird names like Pilot Inspektor but the ones you don't hear often. They're better than having everyone named John or Katey or other boring names like that.

no offense meant to anyone named John or Katey or other boring names like that.

Every child should be named Kefka Palazzo, ok back on topic. I find it funny personally, ever work at a pool in a low income area? Oh the names I have to read, and figure out how to spell.

I am definitely naming my son Kefka Palazzo. Think of how scared shitless anyone who has played FF6 will be when they're around my son. I can see him in day care, He'll be like, "Can I have some juice?" and the teacher will be all, "Please don't kill me and poison the juice supply!!!"

I considered naming my kid that but I would be scared when he gets older that he would destroy me while laughing with a fire behind him and a tower of cars wrecked...

Names sometimes are considered good. Like Brendan *shudders*

I agree with not naming your daughter something ridiculous like Peaches, or Fifi.
Thank god we don't know of anyone called that... Oh.

the nurses said they were going to refuse to let my parents take me home with my chosen first name so they relented and made what was going to be my first name my middle name instead.

simpler times.

i have since changed my name so it doesn't exist.

and no im not going to tell you.

It shouldn't be illegal, but it should be a trap. If you try to name your kid a stupid name, (I would happily volunteer to be the official judge) you should immediately be stripped of any wealth and have the kid sent to a real parents house along with all of your valuble property.

I heard about a kid named Shithead... he pronounced it Sha-theed.

I think it should be illegal to name all of your kids the same name out of sheer vanity:

George Foreman and his family George, George, George, George, George, and Georgina.

I intend to change my surname to "Doctor" and name my child "The"[1]

Yea, it should be illegal so people like me can't name children. My wife will name our child xD

[1] Not serious.... it did cross my mind though

I personally like naming your kids things like this, because when they grow up to be as stupid as their parents then hearing their name saves me from having to talk to them to find out they're an idiot.

I mean, I love Naruto, but I'm still going to call my first born son Jack because I don't want him to hate me.

Yes, There should be laws. I'm tired of all these idiotic names. Very tired.

Kaboose the Moose:
Should hospitals provide a Nurse of Common Sense to all maternity patients?

Yes. They should also prescribe nurses of common sense to people who need them. Badly. That could be a good charity...

There is absolutely no way whatsoever to prevent your kid from being ripped on. Kids are assholes and will always, always, always find some way to make fun of their peers. The only way to really avoid it is to have perfect genes and end up with some kind of beautiful genetically superior uberchild with propensities for charm, intelligence, sophistication, and a unique ability to relate to people, and even then he or she would probably be ripped on by children of anti-intellectuals or something.

Anyway, you can't stop it so there's really no point in censoring the right of parents to name their children whatever stupid shit they can come up with. I know a guy who apparently named his kid Leviathan Prometheus, and while that is incredibly retarded, at least it's not as uninteresting as "Robert Smith" or something. I don't subscribe to the idea that making your child's life as bland as possible in the name of protecting them from everything in the world is a good idea. That's the OTHER way we get serial killers. It's important to find some middle ground.

Actually yes it does kinda.

Sure iv thought about giving my kids cool or "Unique" names, but then i thought about how kids would react to a kid with a name like Lyndis or Chrysanthemum...


Actually, as far as unusual names go, I think Chrysanthemum isn't so bad because it can be shortened to "Chris," (Chrys?) which is a pretty common nickname. That's a pretty good approach; giving your kid a name that is both unusual and common, depending on how you present it.

I guess you could shorten Leviathan to "Levi"... still a pretty terrible name.

While there are no such laws in my country I remember watching a program about it on TV and the clerks who work there (at the place... where you... register kid's name... moving on) had some crazy stories, but also said about times they flat out refused some names and made parents rethink what they are doing. So yeah, good for them.

I would name my kid either:

Grif or Leonard

I'm all for unusual/creative names. I don't buy into the rubbish that giving your child an unusual name will make them any less popular/successful etc, but...yeah, parents really should think about things before they do it.
I read on Yahoo about a guy who was asking whether he should name his daughter "Bayonetta" or not. Personally...this is where I would draw the line. Yes, great game, awesome character, but is this REALLY necessary? Hell, I'd happily name my daughter "Cereza" (a beautiful name, in my opinion), but...yeah, certain things really make me question their morality.

On your point about Violet, far as I'm concerned, that's a girl's name. Unfortunately, children are cruel, so even if it's a perfectly reasonable name (ie. Suits both genders), they WILL pick on other kids. If it's not the name, they'll find something else to tease another child about.'s a lose/lose situation :/

I wish my parents had named me something more creative, but I'm free to change my name if I like. I wouldn't now, because it's part of my identity, but it's good to know that the option is there, if it's REALLY needed.

Housebroken Lunatic:

Kaboose the Moose:

I am not sure where you got the whole "conform to bullies thing" but I am talking about slapping parents from naming their children with forsaken names. In one instance I did mention that horrendous names has a chance of increasing your profile to bullies above the default level, so if you think that your child will be incapable of handling such mental scarring, do him a favor and don't make him stick out.

That isn't conforming..that's camouflage. Some may call it sensible even.

Bottom line: If you can't stand the heat, get out of the kitchen.

Heat is a natural phenomenon. Bullying people however is only anti-social and unacceptable behaviour.

Most civilized societies don't live by the "might makes right" mindset. But you conform to bullies and even try to make their actions seem like natural consequences rather than the despicable and unacceptable behaviour that it is. You basically piss all over ideals like freedom of oppression and the right to live without harassment even if you're somehow different.

I guess you're the kind of person who tell rape victims that they had it coming for dressing "too slutty" or committing the crime of passing out on a couch. Because you're pretty much doing the same thing here.

Somehow you remind me of Alan Harper from "Two and a Half Men". His son wasn't scared of going to school at first, but then Alan proceeds to buy him really ugly shoes (in order to deter bullies from stealing them from Jake) as well as giving Jake money so he can simply give them to the bullies trying to rob him. Basically a philosophy of constantly rolling over and take all the shit that's coming.

That will sure make a kid grow some backbone right? *sarcasm*

Interesting! No, have clearly spent a lot of time guessing my thoughts and beliefs here..about things I am not even discussing no less.

Do I have to repeat myself again? What the ape shit ice-cream balls are you talking about? Have you noticed how everyone else has not picked up on what you're on about? It might have something to do with the fact that I, and everyone else, are talking about parents who give stupid name to their kids [Bolded for your benefit, because I think you might have some visual-cognitive impairment] and you're on some sort of acid-trip.

Once again, I am talking about kids with horrendous names thanks to their parents. YOU, on the other hand, made a whole bunch of assumptions on my part. (I like the part about the rape victims and the things I apparently say to made me chuckle. Not as much as me pissing on freedom though, now THAT got a round of applause from the room)

Most civilized societies don't live by the "might makes right" mindset. But you conform to bullies and even try to make their actions seem like natural consequences rather than the despicable and unacceptable behaviour that it is. You basically piss all over ideals like freedom of oppression and the right to live without harassment even if you're somehow different.

Aw, you got me there buddy. I was just saying before how "might makes right" and how we should force something into those bullies because they clearly have to be dealt with via a show of force because I am from an uncivilized society. Oh, and while I was saying that mouthful I also was saying how trying to stop parent's from adopting ridiculous names for their kids will somehow translate as "conforming to bullies" because we all know that the only thing the bullies want from their victims is a name change. YEAH!! Oppression FTW!! Take that Democracy!

Oh and also FYI, I have another confession for you, [whisper]If you know that the person you are going to have sex with will give you an STD but you have unprotected sex anyway, because say you didn't want to consider the consequences, you might be called a giant, gaping, dic idiot by most people. If you did however have the forethought to put a condom on, then perhaps you may have saved yourself from some awkward future moments. [/whisper]

Just messing with you, condoms are a sign of oppression! Didn't you know that?

but yeah, Grr! Grr, because I feel so mad that you have seen through my clever disguise and logic. Oh the humanity, how will I ever live with myself for being the monster that I am? Perhaps I should go find a rape victim to laugh at now?

Sadly this means that I won't have the time to dignify your "diligent" and "rational" arguments with the response that it deserves but what can I do? I have bullies to high-five and freedom to oppress and only 8 hours of daylight left.

But can I just say this, in all my time as an internet forum poster I have never, never, never met anyone whose username matched their argument style as appropriately as you do.

p.s- "if you can't stand the heat, get out of the kitchen" is an old saying. It means, "don't take on a task if you are unwilling to face its pressures" but it was nice to know that heat was a natural phenomenon because all along I thought it was magics.

p.p.s - Speaking of natural phenomenons..wouldn't bullying be considered a natural phenomenon as well, because its an inevitable part of child development? I am pretty sure that I stumbled across something...

[...] At the same time, there are those in the organization who have concluded from empirical studies that bullying is a natural phenomena and that their role is deserved to be the victim of the bullying activities due to their poor self-image, low level of self-efficacy, or past experiences with bullies (Felson & Steadman, 1983; Olweus, 1978; Schwartz, Dodge, & Coie, 1993; R. Sparks, Glenn, & Dodd, 1977).

No, it should not be illegal.

Your kid's just going to grow up hating you. And, when he's old enough, he'll just change his name, too.

some one from New Jersy named their kid Adolf Hitler. :(

No. But it should legally be as easy as possible foe people to change their names once they are an adults.

I do agree though: rule #1 on naming your child: can the other kids make fun of your kid because of the name? (kids can be horrible to each other, don't make it easier).

I saw a story about a girl whose name was spelled La-a. Everywhere she went, nobody knew how to pronounce it. Apparently, the offending mother figured that everyone would understand that "the dash ain't silent".
Even spelled phonetically, Ledasha is a stupid name.

There are also several children registered as "ESPN", pronounced "Espin". Seriously, parents, what the hell?

That's why we have a "name list" over here.

You have to choose one name off the list. Or, if you want to be a rebel the name you have chosen has to be submitted for approbation.

There's still stupid names around, however.

You can't make it illegal, but they should sure as hell be allowed to sue their parents for defamation of character, and emotional distress (if that should be allowed in any case, it's this one).

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