Oh boy a gun thread, now i get to watch people get butt-hurt over the 2nd amendment
OT: The dad was in the right, tough parenting is what is needed these days. Parents should act more like this guy, and kids need to understand responsibility.
Neither of us have ever had a child in their life. But hey, if you're allowed to talk like you have a clue what a "good parent" should do these days, then I think I'll jump on board as well.
A lot of people seem to be focusing on what he did as though it was the best possible way for the man to make a point.
Making a youtube video which not only berates her but involves firing several rounds into the girl's laptop with a gun is not, by any means, the kind of thing any reasonable, rational or responsible parent would do.
If the girl has been getting away with her crap for long enough to be able to compile a list of her parent's day-to-day complaints, then the fault doesn't lie with the girl, not entirely, anyways.
Everyone seems to be approaching this particular situation as though the parents have been saddled with some horrible gremlin, but someone doesn't start acting this bratty unless the parents have failed to step in at some point.
Now, every single complaint the guy has about her attitude is 100% reasonable. I'm not disputing that. But for christ's sake, his daughter didn't end up like this for no reason. At one point he says "now i warned you, months ago..." that's hardly pro-active parenting, is it? That's hardly dealing with the issue at hand.
So she's had a warning a few months ago, and has since been able to carry on with the same shit every single day. Hell, we even know her father actually upgraded her laptop for her. Why didn't he say "cut this shit out, because you don't get your laptop until you do" ages ago? how did this go on so long if he's the hard-nosed parent he makes out he is? Why on earth did he do a favour to his daughter by upgrading her laptop for her when he thinks she acts like a brat? How can he be indignant when she carries on this way for so long? there would have been a point at which her parents should have said "I guess we have no-one to blame but ourselves for letting her get away with this for so long, time to do something about it...."
And then there's his method of finally dealing with it. Instead of acting like a grown man and confronting his daughter, outlining his complaints, making it VERY clear she abides by his rules and the confiscating her laptop until she complies (or even selling it + anything else he bought her that she thinks she has a right to have), he instead creates the kind of "take that" public response more suited to a teenager.
I have nothing against him letting his punishment be public, but the manner in which he does this is just reactionary. It isn't "OK, I'm going to straighten out my daughter" or "Now I'm going to let her know just how hard we worked for her".
Instead, goes on youtube. he begins by making an argument which would sound entirely reasonable if he just made said argument to her face, alongside her mother. Getting the girl's stepmother in on it would be handy as well
And then... for fuck's sake, he shoots several rounds into her laptop and then sits down, visibly upset, and...
...I don't even know. This isn't rational or responsible, he marred a perfectly reasonable speech to his daughter by doing it via the internet and then acting like a child. It seems like this guy is just at war with his own kid, or that he doesn't know how to take responsbility for her, and has to resort to petty actions like this to spite her as opposed to laying down the rules and setting any kind of reasonable, admirable example to her.
This wasn't discipline, this was him acting petty because he couldn't control himself. That's without even going into the issue of an angry, upset grown man using a loaded gun for an act of childish vengeance....
No wonder she keeps acting out...
I'm not saying firing at an object is wrong. He's discharging it simply out of anger at his daughter. It's one thing to do something like that for practice, or even as a hobby. This was done out of anger. A gun should not be used like that.
The weapon was discharged safely with no risk to bystanders. I see no issue. And I'd rather he take his anger out on an object than a person.
In short: no harm done, no foul called.
Well first of all, you have the issue of whether or not anger should be the deciding factor in the steps he takes towards disciplining his own daughter.
Actually, that's not an issue at all. Because it shouldn't. The man has a right to be angry, but allowing it to have an influence over his judgement regarding his daughter when it's his responsibility to raise her and keep her in line is unnaceptable. Allowing it to have an influence over his judgement when he's holding a gun in his hand is even worse. Look at the end of the video, he looks like he's about to start tearing up.
Furthermore, you seem to be labouring under the misconception that the best thing to do with anger is to let it out, as if that's the only choice.
Scientific fact: not only is that completely untrue, but it's actually psychologically unhealthy.
She wrote an angry post on Facebook. So he shot the computer. Nine times. I think it would appear more sane if it had been done out of anger and not filmed for Youtube and planned out.
Its just weird. Not to mention the fact that he's only going to have solidified what his daughter thinks of him already (rightly or wrongly).
Made me lol.
This is exactly why I hate people from his generation. They're ignorant, sleazy, good-for-nothing, and are willing to go to any extreme to keep their children in slave labor without even an allowance for as long as possible legally. He shouldn't be forcing his kid to make coffee for him, and he shouldn't not be paying her for the chores she does. He should be prioritizing her schoolwork over chores or yardwork that he wants done, should be prioritizing her future over his wants. But no. I'll bet he does that purposely so that she won't HAVE a future to leave to, and so that he can keep her working into her adulthood. And then, this shouldn't even be something she was punished for. This is AMERICA, goddamnit! WE HAVE RIGHTS HERE. KIDS ARE ALLOWED TO TALK LIKE THAT ABOUT ANYONE THEY WANT. THAT'S WHY WE HAVE THE GODFORSAKEN FIRST AMMENDMENT! A lot of Americans (And I'm sure this fat-ass is included) say that the Government is often trying to take away their rights to religion, free speech, ect. And then things like this happen that make them the biggest hippocrytes in the world. Severe punishment for saying words is not free speech.
Well first of all, you obviously never watched the video. Second of all, I'm going to assume you're roughly 14 years old, and that you recently had an argument with one of your parents because you didn't want to have to tidy your room.
These assumptions probably seem incredibly petty. But hey, I am nothing if not willing to immediately abandon my pretence to maturity.
That's disgusting. People think this is good parenting? Parents should sit down and discuss chores with their children, reaching an agreement on what seems reasonable based on how much work they each have to do both inside and outside the house. Children should do chores out of love because they acknowledge that if they don't help, their parents will be doing all the work. They shouldn't be doing chores out of fear of punishment. I cannot see wantonly destroying her possessions with a gun and putting up this video in an attempt to humiliate her as anything other than deliberate intimidation. "Do as I say or I will destroy your shit" is hardly an attitude conducive to mutual love and respect.
Have you ever been 15 years old? I have, and I was a right shithead. There has to be a point at which a parent will say "No, you do exactly what we say or there will be consequences".
While I agree with the last part of your post, it's damn near impossible to get someone to sit down and have a huggy-wuggy reasonable chat when their hormones are firing off all over the place and they have an in-built reaction to chores that screams "TYRANNY".
For example, I'm 19 right now, I pay my rent and board and try to keep the house running clean and comfortable for my parents for putting up with me, but I still can't get that reaction to go away. 10 minutes ago I had an overwhelming urge to go do some housework and fix a leaky pipe. This drive was replaced with apathy the moment my dad asked me to do roughly 1/5th of the jobs I had planned to do. I haven't got a clue where this stupid reaction comes from and I try to beat it back down as soon as it appears, but it's been there since I hit puberty. Even though I'm well over that hill, it still keeps popping up.
Now imagine that sort of stupidity but magnified tenfold. Can you really expect a reasonable chat from someone going through that?
On the one hand:
A 15 year old girl shouldn't be sassing her dad like that, you don't take that kind of crap from your child.
Punishment fits the crime, can't argue with that; hell I'm seeing actual parenting. Mark this day in your diary kiddies.
Yes, young lady, do your fucking chores. Welcome to being a teenager, we've all been there.
Yes, Facebook and a laptop are a privelige that your father (therefore legal guardian/jailer/provider/GOD) can take away.
On the other hand:
You chose a pretty fucking juvenille way to respond dude; bitching on Facebook is the level of a teenage girl: not an experienced IT worker or a mature age man.
The whole speil about how you spent your youth....well regarless of it's status as truth (which I won't argue) it really just comes off as the whole 'hiking fifteen miles in the snow to get to school with no shoes' spiel. Seriously, the only people I remember saying that were Lou Pickles and Abe Simpson. Not saying you're wrong to point it out, but it seems like holier than thou pontificating than proving a point.
The use of the gun. Now I'll give some background here: I'm from Australia so my personal experience with a firearm is nil. There is something deeply unsettling to me about taking someone's property (even if its obviously a gift from you) and unloading a full magazine of live rounds into it, dropping the obligitory "and this one is for" line. This isn't just taking a hard line with an obviously spoilt child; you have crossed into vicariously threatening her with a weapon. Respect born of fear for your life (she's 15, Christ knows how her brain would interpret that) is the respect of slaves to masters, not children to parents.
Her current attitude has obviously been enabled by either you or your wife or both of you. If you applied about half the discipline in that video on a regular basis, you'd probably never gotten this point. OR, the child has deep behavioural issues and this stunt won't have the desired effect anyway.
This is exactly why I hate people from his generation. They're ignorant, sleazy, good-for-nothing
That's hateful and ageist bigotry. /reported
are willing to go to any extreme to keep their children in slave labor without even an allowance for as long as possible legally
Does she pay rent? No? Then its not slave labour, its contributing to the household that you are part of. Frankly, the chore list seemed pretty light.
WE HAVE RIGHTS HERE. KIDS ARE ALLOWED TO TALK LIKE THAT ABOUT ANYONE THEY WANT. THAT'S WHY WE HAVE THE GODFORSAKEN FIRST AMMENDMENT!
Before you quote the first amendment you may wish to read it and read up on it. The first amendment is to protect you from your government, not from your parents. Also free speech is not without limits. For example, a rant on facebook, even if she was an adult, can be illegal under defamation of character/slander/libel laws.
A lot of Americans (And I'm sure this fat-ass is included) say that the Government is often trying to take away their rights to religion, free speech, ect. And then things like this happen that make them the biggest hippocrytes in the world. Severe punishment for saying words is not free speech.
No, they just understand what they are talking about, you do no.
Thank you for having the patience to address that guy in a mature manner. I certianly didn't....
O NOEZ PEEPUL HAV GUNZ! THER GON DESTROY DA CIVELEYEZD WURLD!
Its amazing how some foolish people think like that isn't it?
"GASP GUNS R EVILZ~!!"
Who thinks like that?