Dad uses Facebook to teach daughter a lesson.

 Pages PREV 1 . . . 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 . . . 20 NEXT
 

mellemhund:

Dramerc:
@all the liberls on here

Britain is in Chaos because of the unruly youth like her the riots and hell people being knifed kids needs to be hit it does them no harm aslong as they fully understand so he did the right thing in my mind cause the kid has to learn the hard way eventually this was the last straw she never listened or obeyed the rules she was warned time and time again that it'd be worse and she just had to have that go in conclusion she got what she bloody deserved and idc what the liberal wankers say the country is in hell cause of them

EDIT

BEFORE ANYONE miss qoutes me like last time read the LIKE HER bit didn't blame her for the riots i blamed kids LIKE HER

She's acting like a perfectly normal teenager. Old people have always blamed the troubles of the world on them. IF you think that anyone acting like her has anything to do with the riots in England, then you do not understand the first thing about how societies work.

Harsh punishments handed out long time after a warning does little to nothing to prevent
actions. But both politicians and parents are too uninformed to try any other thing. The dad in this case have pent up anger that he let loose instead of actually doing a job of raising a kid.

You are on the same level. "hitting kids will teach them not to be violent" If you can't see the problem there, then you are beyond help. Raising kids should be done not with threats, but with firm boundaries, which make them feel safe. Letting them do something some of the time and then suddenly punishing them hard will make them anxious and violent, diminishing their ability to interact properly with others.

Parents need to learn to parent. Politicians need to listen to experts instead of going on gut feelings. And then we'll begin to actually see a positive change. And it all start with you!

How old are you?

Nikolaz72:

Kashrlyyk:

cyber95:
I'm going to go ahead an copy something that somebody on Tumblr said that I agree with 100 percent.
....

Seriously, why is it the daughter's fault? And why is the response that people applaud not 'Talk to your daughter' and instead 'Make a mockery out of how she feels on Youtube?'

Finally someone who gets it! There is not a gene that makes people spoiled or immature, it is not something that just happens. No, IT IS LEARNED! And it is a sign of bad parenting.

So when this guy was confronted with the fact that he and his wife are SHIT at parenting he could not cope with loosing the delusion of being a good parent and punished HER for HIS failure. And only retards and other failures applaud that.

People should understand by now that a loud minority (I dont want to believe its the majority) on escapist applauds bad parrenting and hates kids. This is why such things here are so supported, they hate kids. Therefor they dont need to hear about kids being treated like normal human-beings. Actually, the more mistreatment it seems the more they like the story. Im pretty sure back when the video of the father that 'hit' his daughter came up like half those people were supporting it because (OH, IT WAS ONLY WITH THE BACK OF HIS HAND)

You know how I was punished?. . . well, alright. I wasnt since I didnt misbehave ever.

But you know how my SISTER! Was puinished? They cut off the internet for a while and took her phone and didnt let her see her friends. No contact to friends for a couple of days is a really good, unharmful. Punishment.

I have to chime in on this, because I need to apologize for the way I minimized that other video. My parents have a lot in common with both the guy in that video, and especially with the guy in this one. It took going off to college for a year and a half and coming back for my final internship to realize just how abnormal this kind of parenting is.

OT: This is abuse, plain and simple. We're only getting one side of the story, the abuser's, and frankly, I'm more inclined to believe the daughter than I am him. So what if he shows a nice face to the world? Successful abusers /do./ It's how they treat their family that counts, and we've just been shown a disturbing, accidentally honest slice of how this man treats his family.

Edit: Oh, and who want's to bet on what that "$130 worth of software" was? Because my guess is that the "upgrade" was nothing but a copy of Microsoft Office, which she probably legitimately needed for class. "Luxury item" my ass.

Edit

I was with the guy for the first 5 minutes of the video...it's always a bad idea to a) friend your parents of facebook, no matter what age and b) complain about your parents online. Privacy is not dead, and it should be valued. This is an extreme example, but an example nevertheless. Yeah, the girl is obviously spoiled, not having to work at the age of 15 and possessing a lot of expensive technologies. But, then the dad goes a bit overboard. Actually, VERY overboard. WHo the h*** puts bullets into a laptop? Too extreme. I agree with grounding, and taking away the laptop until the daughter can demonstrate appropriate internet behavior. I cannot agree, however, with the violent reaction to her laptop, as well as making a video of it and posting ot where it can unnecessarily humiliate her to everyone she knows and then some.

This, rather than properly rehabilitating her, as proper discipline would do, is just going to damage her further. Way to go, Dad. Jeez.

Lol, how could any person say that he "lost control" "because of anger"? He was cool and collected the entire time. Regarding him counting the shots, he unloaded a few and then remembered that he needed to save one for the wife; that's not "losing count because of anger."

Using a gun to shoot an inanimate object like in this video isn't stupid in the slightest, especially if the symbolism behind it will carry a lot of weight.

Maybe OP and others grew up in a city or something, but I don't understand how anyone that lived in the suburbs or more-rural could possibly be opposed to this.

Irridium:
So, who here has read the official response from the father in all this?

Should probably put this in the OP.

Giving the people the opportunity to see the response of this man and his daughter to this? Surely you're jesting!

On Topic:

Alltogether, I foresaw this kind of response, from father + daughter as from a community who is too quick to bash America. There was nothing wrong with what he did, he was not in rage as many here suggest.

Also, do people here really think that a guy shooting something in a field will mentally scar his daughter who is not even THERE? Teens are not made out of glas, I had it worse in my childhood and I have no problems whatsoever.

Edit

so, while I don't condone the use of a gun, I totally agree with what he said. If that's how she's going to act despite warnings beforehand, then good on him for having the restraint to just destroy the laptop and not just beat her pathetic ass...

I find it hilarious that 90% of the people hating on the guy are people who don't have their date of birth listed in their profile. Rebellion against parents much?

hubert:

chadachada123:
Lol, how could any person say that he "lost control" "because of anger"? He was cool and collected the entire time. Regarding him counting the shots, he unloaded a few and then remembered that he needed to save one for the wife; that's not "losing count because of anger."

Using a gun to shoot an inanimate object like in this video isn't stupid in the slightest, especially if the symbolism behind it will carry a lot of weight.

Maybe OP and others grew up in a city or something, but I don't understand how anyone that lived in the suburbs or more-rural could possibly be opposed to this.

I find it creepy when you start talking about symbolism, is the daughter going to be the laptop next time or what?

Whenever you feel you need to use a firearm to parent your kid properly, you're doing it WRONG.

By the way did the dad say that he had two jobs and went to high school and college at the same time at her age? I find that hard to believe..
(I might just have misunderstood)

Why do all of you who disapprove of the father always say something like "Oh no! He shot a laptop with a gun! Next time he's going to gun down his entire family!"

He told his daughter that if she fucked up like that again then he'd put a bullet through her laptop. And guess what, she fucked up and he put a bullet through her laptop.

Ramzal:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=kl1ujzRidmU

So, after watching it, reading the responses posted on Page 8, and pondering for a bit - I'm okay with this, but barely.

What he did right:

-He is obviously a parent who pays attention, is culturally aware, and attempts to foster respect in his progeny. I'm behind him for this 100%. His comment about the cleaning lady was particularly admirable.

-He warned her previously of her attitude. He was upfront and took her to task about it at least once before. Warnings must always come before punishments.

-While he used a gun, yes, he used it in a manner he was comfortable with and knew to be safe. He obviously knew to use hollow points, and had extensive experience. THIS is what makes the use of the gun OKAY. He was cool, he knew what he was doing. It's been a long time since I fired any sort of gun, and I'd never think about the hollow points to avoid ricochet. At the same time, he's never had to handle triflouric acid before, and I'd feel more comfortable handling it than him because of an extensive background in chemistry. If the person knows how to use it safely, and uses it safely, I don't see it as necessarily a bad thing.

-His responses to the media were spot-on. He didn't exploit the incident, he didn't tout his viewpoint on talk shows, it's another indicator that he's probably a good parent.

-He never raged. He was frustrated, yes, but there's a difference between being very frustrated (which is fine and normal) and then flipping out (which is not).

What the grey areas are:

-I'm not convinced the gun was the best solution. Yes, it was OK that he used the gun, but to destroy the laptop with it instead of simply taking it away or selling it? Not sure.

-The video could be construed as being very passive aggressive. Most people are a little passive aggressive, but I don't get that feeling from him. I get that he's a busy man and probably doesn't have much time to talk to his daughter as much as he'd like - so this was how he chose to get the message across.

What he was short-sighted on:

-Teenagers say shit. They always have, and always will. Destroying the laptop might permanently lodge the lesson in her head, or it might be forgotten in two months as she goes back to spouting more shit.

-Times. Have. Changed. He went on a huge spiel about "When I was your age..." and that's a blaring error. The guy looks like he's in his 40s - which seems about right to have a daughter in her mid-teens. That means the guy was born in the 70s, and spent his teens working in the 80s. What's different these days? Well, besides the internet, the biggest difference is the expectations on kids today to do well in school and the expectations of employers. You MUST do well in school in order to get into college (which she obviously plans on attending), and these days colleges expect a lot more from their freshman. Do you have volunteer hours? Do you have a high GPA? Do you have leadership experience? What's your ACT score? Have you remained active in a sport throughout your high school career? It's significantly harder to distinguish yourself, and in some cases it's almost like a job. I'm currently in my last semester of a B.S. and to remain competitive for grad school I have had to rack up 300+ hours of volunteer service, 35+ hours of research, 40+ hours of leadership experience, retain a 3.0+ GPA in a Research 1 school, and do well on the big test. Most students who work FT and try to go to school drop out or fail. That's the truth. While there are exceptions, my degree course and route to grad school has nearly a 75% fallout rate. So, yes, I believe the guy when he says he did all that stuff; that's admirable. Seriously, though, I doubt he was under the same amount of societal pressure to succeed academically. In addition, most employers simply have different standards. There are exceedingly few entry-level positions, more restrictions on teenage employment, and often the jobs teens can get are utter shit because employers push the minimum wagers beyond their capabilities. One of my first jobs out of high school (before college) was pushing carts. I was expected to bring in all of the shopping carts in under 15 minutes. This was over 3 lots which probably composed 2 square miles - which is practically impossible to do in the first place. The more hilarious bit is that - BY LAW - I was only able to bring in 10 carts at a time (and yes, I was yelled at for bringing in more). There were probably close to 50 in every lot every 30 minutes. It was simply impossible to do. The area was too big to cover in the time, but I was reprimanded nonetheless. Jobs are just different than when he was working, employers are less forgiving, and his daughter's academic workload is most likely several times what his was. As long as she's doing well in school and extra-curriculars, he should be happy.

You know, I really don't get why it was such a big deal that she said those things. Why exactly can't she have an angry little rant amongst her friends? It's not as if she said it to her parents themselves. I might rant to someone about how my brother is annoying me for instance, not gonna start a fight with him over it. And in the end it's just letting off some steam, forgotten in a while. And one thing that's really incomprehensible to me is that what he wants is respect. Well I don't know how everyone else here is, but the last way to earn real respect from me is via consequences. I don't care if you put a gun to my head, I won't actually respect you. At best I'll give lip service to the idea and backstab you the second I can.

I'd been putting off watching the video and just talking about the gun usage since that seemed to be the big thing people cared about, but since we've finally moved past that I checked to see just how bad she actually was.

And he could have addressed it in a way that was perhaps less melodramatic. If her parents confronted her with it maybe she would have been ashamed on that alone. No reason to put it to all her friends on FB anyway. That's just petty.

Owyn_Merrilin:

Nikolaz72:

Kashrlyyk:
Finally someone who gets it! There is not a gene that makes people spoiled or immature, it is not something that just happens. No, IT IS LEARNED! And it is a sign of bad parenting.

So when this guy was confronted with the fact that he and his wife are SHIT at parenting he could not cope with loosing the delusion of being a good parent and punished HER for HIS failure. And only retards and other failures applaud that.

People should understand by now that a loud minority (I dont want to believe its the majority) on escapist applauds bad parrenting and hates kids. This is why such things here are so supported, they hate kids. Therefor they dont need to hear about kids being treated like normal human-beings. Actually, the more mistreatment it seems the more they like the story. Im pretty sure back when the video of the father that 'hit' his daughter came up like half those people were supporting it because (OH, IT WAS ONLY WITH THE BACK OF HIS HAND)

You know how I was punished?. . . well, alright. I wasnt since I didnt misbehave ever.

But you know how my SISTER! Was puinished? They cut off the internet for a while and took her phone and didnt let her see her friends. No contact to friends for a couple of days is a really good, unharmful. Punishment.

I have to chime in on this, because I need to apologize for the way I minimized that other video. My parents have a lot in common with both the guy in that video, and especially with the guy in this one. It took going off to college for a year and a half and coming back for my final internship to realize just how abnormal this kind of parenting is.

OT: This is abuse, plain and simple. We're only getting one side of the story, the abuser's, and frankly, I'm more inclined to believe the daughter than I am him. So what if he shows a nice face to the world? Successful abusers /do./ It's how they treat their family that counts, and we've just been shown a disturbing, accidentally honest slice of how this man treats his family.

Edit: Oh, and who want's to bet on what that "$130 worth of software" was? Because my guess is that the "upgrade" was nothing but a copy of Microsoft Office, which she probably legitimately needed for class. "Luxury item" my ass.

Ive been trying to keep from chiming in on this, but have you even read his follow ups? The reaction of his daughter, etc.? Go on his facebook and look (you can get there from the video).

Heres a few bullet points.

1. Daughter felt bad at first, come to realize she was in the wrong, getting along with life happily.
2. Police and CPS visited him because of the TREMENDOUS amount of calls from internet goers. Results? The officers said 'kudos from the department', and the CPS gal dismissed it after a thorough investigation.

So... No. No abuse, the family is just fine, and everything is getting along well with them.

TheKasp:

Irridium:
So, who here has read the official response from the father in all this?

Should probably put this in the OP.

Giving the people the opportunity to see the response of this man and his daughter to this? Surely you're jesting!

On Topic:

Alltogether, I foresaw this kind of response, from father + daughter as from a community who is too quick to bash America. There was nothing wrong with what he did, he was not in rage as many here suggest.

Also, do people here really think that a guy shooting something in a field will mentally scar his daughter who is not even THERE? Teens are not made out of glas, I had it worse in my childhood and I have no problems whatsoever.

My problem with this: we have only heard his side of the story. How could we not? He destroyed his daughter's laptop[1]. I'm a bit worried about posting this, because my parents know what my username is on here, but fuck it: if she's in the situation I think she is, posting on Facebook would have been seen as a last resort, because she's been isolated to the point that she has nobody she can tell in person, or at least she feels like she does. When her dad took away her Facebook privileges as well, she really didn't have a way of getting her story out. Definitely not to the world at large; maybe not to anyone else, either.

[1] Yes, her laptop, not his: you can't take back a gift like that, parent or not.

thethird0611:

Owyn_Merrilin:

Nikolaz72:

People should understand by now that a loud minority (I dont want to believe its the majority) on escapist applauds bad parrenting and hates kids. This is why such things here are so supported, they hate kids. Therefor they dont need to hear about kids being treated like normal human-beings. Actually, the more mistreatment it seems the more they like the story. Im pretty sure back when the video of the father that 'hit' his daughter came up like half those people were supporting it because (OH, IT WAS ONLY WITH THE BACK OF HIS HAND)

You know how I was punished?. . . well, alright. I wasnt since I didnt misbehave ever.

But you know how my SISTER! Was puinished? They cut off the internet for a while and took her phone and didnt let her see her friends. No contact to friends for a couple of days is a really good, unharmful. Punishment.

I have to chime in on this, because I need to apologize for the way I minimized that other video. My parents have a lot in common with both the guy in that video, and especially with the guy in this one. It took going off to college for a year and a half and coming back for my final internship to realize just how abnormal this kind of parenting is.

OT: This is abuse, plain and simple. We're only getting one side of the story, the abuser's, and frankly, I'm more inclined to believe the daughter than I am him. So what if he shows a nice face to the world? Successful abusers /do./ It's how they treat their family that counts, and we've just been shown a disturbing, accidentally honest slice of how this man treats his family.

Edit: Oh, and who want's to bet on what that "$130 worth of software" was? Because my guess is that the "upgrade" was nothing but a copy of Microsoft Office, which she probably legitimately needed for class. "Luxury item" my ass.

Ive been trying to keep from chiming in on this, but have you even read his follow ups? The reaction of his daughter, etc.? Go on his facebook and look (you can get there from the video).

Heres a few bullet points.

1. Daughter felt bad at first, come to realize she was in the wrong, getting along with life happily.
2. Police and CPS visited him because of the TREMENDOUS amount of calls from internet goers. Results? The officers said 'kudos from the department', and the CPS gal dismissed it after a thorough investigation.

So... No. No abuse, the family is just fine, and everything is getting along well with them.

And read what I posted below. We've only seen his side of the story, and CPS/the police are notoriously bad at telling the difference between a genuinely nice person and an abuser who is good at putting on a nice public persona.

Restricting gun laws is restricting freedom. In my view that fact that a gun was used is irrelevant to anything, and he seemed pretty calm to me he even set up a camera to record the message. The fact that he destroyed her laptop seems extreme but he's her father surely that's for him to decide. People who go nuts over a gun being used to shoot something are a little bit to idealistic for their own good. Did he shoot someone? Was he irresponsible with his weapon? No he was in field a fair distance from any potential by standers. Let the man be.

thethird0611:

Owyn_Merrilin:

Nikolaz72:

People should understand by now that a loud minority (I dont want to believe its the majority) on escapist applauds bad parrenting and hates kids. This is why such things here are so supported, they hate kids. Therefor they dont need to hear about kids being treated like normal human-beings. Actually, the more mistreatment it seems the more they like the story. Im pretty sure back when the video of the father that 'hit' his daughter came up like half those people were supporting it because (OH, IT WAS ONLY WITH THE BACK OF HIS HAND)

You know how I was punished?. . . well, alright. I wasnt since I didnt misbehave ever.

But you know how my SISTER! Was puinished? They cut off the internet for a while and took her phone and didnt let her see her friends. No contact to friends for a couple of days is a really good, unharmful. Punishment.

I have to chime in on this, because I need to apologize for the way I minimized that other video. My parents have a lot in common with both the guy in that video, and especially with the guy in this one. It took going off to college for a year and a half and coming back for my final internship to realize just how abnormal this kind of parenting is.

OT: This is abuse, plain and simple. We're only getting one side of the story, the abuser's, and frankly, I'm more inclined to believe the daughter than I am him. So what if he shows a nice face to the world? Successful abusers /do./ It's how they treat their family that counts, and we've just been shown a disturbing, accidentally honest slice of how this man treats his family.

Edit: Oh, and who want's to bet on what that "$130 worth of software" was? Because my guess is that the "upgrade" was nothing but a copy of Microsoft Office, which she probably legitimately needed for class. "Luxury item" my ass.

Ive been trying to keep from chiming in on this, but have you even read his follow ups? The reaction of his daughter, etc.? Go on his facebook and look (you can get there from the video).

Heres a few bullet points.

1. Daughter felt bad at first, come to realize she was in the wrong, getting along with life happily.
2. Police and CPS visited him because of the TREMENDOUS amount of calls from internet goers. Results? The officers said 'kudos from the department', and the CPS gal dismissed it after a thorough investigation.

So... No. No abuse, the family is just fine, and everything is getting along well with them.

You do know that regardless of what his daughter thinks, her only means of communication is him and she's gonna feel like she has to appease him to avoid more punishment, yeah? If she dissented then we really wouldn't know.

This guy deserves a pat on the back for his parenting.That's how it's done.

Mortai Gravesend:

thethird0611:

Owyn_Merrilin:

I have to chime in on this, because I need to apologize for the way I minimized that other video. My parents have a lot in common with both the guy in that video, and especially with the guy in this one. It took going off to college for a year and a half and coming back for my final internship to realize just how abnormal this kind of parenting is.

OT: This is abuse, plain and simple. We're only getting one side of the story, the abuser's, and frankly, I'm more inclined to believe the daughter than I am him. So what if he shows a nice face to the world? Successful abusers /do./ It's how they treat their family that counts, and we've just been shown a disturbing, accidentally honest slice of how this man treats his family.

Edit: Oh, and who want's to bet on what that "$130 worth of software" was? Because my guess is that the "upgrade" was nothing but a copy of Microsoft Office, which she probably legitimately needed for class. "Luxury item" my ass.

Ive been trying to keep from chiming in on this, but have you even read his follow ups? The reaction of his daughter, etc.? Go on his facebook and look (you can get there from the video).

Heres a few bullet points.

1. Daughter felt bad at first, come to realize she was in the wrong, getting along with life happily.
2. Police and CPS visited him because of the TREMENDOUS amount of calls from internet goers. Results? The officers said 'kudos from the department', and the CPS gal dismissed it after a thorough investigation.

So... No. No abuse, the family is just fine, and everything is getting along well with them.

You do know that regardless of what his daughter thinks, her only means of communication is him and she's gonna feel like she has to appease him to avoid more punishment, yeah? If she dissented then we really wouldn't know.

Exactly my point. If he really is an abuser, we can't take his word about /anything/ regarding this, yet that's the only word we've heard. Funny, that.

Mortai Gravesend:

thethird0611:

Owyn_Merrilin:

I have to chime in on this, because I need to apologize for the way I minimized that other video. My parents have a lot in common with both the guy in that video, and especially with the guy in this one. It took going off to college for a year and a half and coming back for my final internship to realize just how abnormal this kind of parenting is.

OT: This is abuse, plain and simple. We're only getting one side of the story, the abuser's, and frankly, I'm more inclined to believe the daughter than I am him. So what if he shows a nice face to the world? Successful abusers /do./ It's how they treat their family that counts, and we've just been shown a disturbing, accidentally honest slice of how this man treats his family.

Edit: Oh, and who want's to bet on what that "$130 worth of software" was? Because my guess is that the "upgrade" was nothing but a copy of Microsoft Office, which she probably legitimately needed for class. "Luxury item" my ass.

Ive been trying to keep from chiming in on this, but have you even read his follow ups? The reaction of his daughter, etc.? Go on his facebook and look (you can get there from the video).

Heres a few bullet points.

1. Daughter felt bad at first, come to realize she was in the wrong, getting along with life happily.
2. Police and CPS visited him because of the TREMENDOUS amount of calls from internet goers. Results? The officers said 'kudos from the department', and the CPS gal dismissed it after a thorough investigation.

So... No. No abuse, the family is just fine, and everything is getting along well with them.

You do know that regardless of what his daughter thinks, her only means of communication is him and she's gonna feel like she has to appease him to avoid more punishment, yeah? If she dissented then we really wouldn't know.

So him giving her an offer to make her own video in response, or post something on facebook about it, makes it so she appeases her? He again even told in one of his post that she sat with him and looked at some of the comments on the matter, and she couldnt believe what people were saying. Plain and simple she said she was fine.

Soo... That, and that her friends could always report how she really feels somehow?

Just because there is a conspiracy theory doesnt mean that its true.

God damn, these threads really do show the age group that hangs out here at the Escapist.

OT: I really don't see anything wrong with this. The people blasting him for using a gun are just... stupid.

thethird0611:

Mortai Gravesend:

thethird0611:

Ive been trying to keep from chiming in on this, but have you even read his follow ups? The reaction of his daughter, etc.? Go on his facebook and look (you can get there from the video).

Heres a few bullet points.

1. Daughter felt bad at first, come to realize she was in the wrong, getting along with life happily.
2. Police and CPS visited him because of the TREMENDOUS amount of calls from internet goers. Results? The officers said 'kudos from the department', and the CPS gal dismissed it after a thorough investigation.

So... No. No abuse, the family is just fine, and everything is getting along well with them.

You do know that regardless of what his daughter thinks, her only means of communication is him and she's gonna feel like she has to appease him to avoid more punishment, yeah? If she dissented then we really wouldn't know.

So him giving her an offer to make her own video in response, or post something on facebook about it, makes it so she appeases her? He again even told in one of his post that she sat with him and looked at some of the comments on the matter, and she couldnt believe what people were saying. Plain and simple she said she was fine.

Soo... That, and that her friends could always report how she really feels somehow?

Just because there is a conspiracy theory doesnt mean that its true.

http://aconography.blogspot.com/2012/02/parenting-troubled-teen.html

Read this. In fact, everyone who thinks this guy is so wonderful, just read it. It's not a conspiracy theory; this fits a specific profile of abuse.

Owyn_Merrilin:

thethird0611:

Owyn_Merrilin:

I have to chime in on this, because I need to apologize for the way I minimized that other video. My parents have a lot in common with both the guy in that video, and especially with the guy in this one. It took going off to college for a year and a half and coming back for my final internship to realize just how abnormal this kind of parenting is.

OT: This is abuse, plain and simple. We're only getting one side of the story, the abuser's, and frankly, I'm more inclined to believe the daughter than I am him. So what if he shows a nice face to the world? Successful abusers /do./ It's how they treat their family that counts, and we've just been shown a disturbing, accidentally honest slice of how this man treats his family.

Edit: Oh, and who want's to bet on what that "$130 worth of software" was? Because my guess is that the "upgrade" was nothing but a copy of Microsoft Office, which she probably legitimately needed for class. "Luxury item" my ass.

Ive been trying to keep from chiming in on this, but have you even read his follow ups? The reaction of his daughter, etc.? Go on his facebook and look (you can get there from the video).

Heres a few bullet points.

1. Daughter felt bad at first, come to realize she was in the wrong, getting along with life happily.
2. Police and CPS visited him because of the TREMENDOUS amount of calls from internet goers. Results? The officers said 'kudos from the department', and the CPS gal dismissed it after a thorough investigation.

So... No. No abuse, the family is just fine, and everything is getting along well with them.

And read what I posted below. We've only seen his side of the story, and CPS/the police are notoriously bad at telling the difference between a genuinely nice person and an abuser who is good at putting on a nice public persona.

Ill post kinda what I did to the other person. He offered her a chance to say something on both youtube/facebook. So, yeah, kinda seems everything alright.

Just wow, so someone whos trained to look for abuse, who interviewed the daughter privately, who saw the fathers firearms and checked the whole house, couldnt find even a little abuse to call anything in question. Nice.

Even if a conspiracy theory exist, it may not be true. So you trying to find something wrong with it is going to make it seem the one possible way in your mind.

I'm more concerned that the father took the time to make a public show out of his daughter, then I am about the gun, not saying the gun was a smart move either.

thethird0611:

Mortai Gravesend:

thethird0611:

Ive been trying to keep from chiming in on this, but have you even read his follow ups? The reaction of his daughter, etc.? Go on his facebook and look (you can get there from the video).

Heres a few bullet points.

1. Daughter felt bad at first, come to realize she was in the wrong, getting along with life happily.
2. Police and CPS visited him because of the TREMENDOUS amount of calls from internet goers. Results? The officers said 'kudos from the department', and the CPS gal dismissed it after a thorough investigation.

So... No. No abuse, the family is just fine, and everything is getting along well with them.

You do know that regardless of what his daughter thinks, her only means of communication is him and she's gonna feel like she has to appease him to avoid more punishment, yeah? If she dissented then we really wouldn't know.

So him giving her an offer to make her own video in response, or post something on facebook about it, makes it so she appeases her? He again even told in one of his post that she sat with him and looked at some of the comments on the matter, and she couldnt believe what people were saying. Plain and simple she said she was fine.

Soo... That, and that her friends could always report how she really feels somehow?

Just because there is a conspiracy theory doesnt mean that its true.

He will be able to monitor anything she says. Suppose she dissents. How do you think he will react? With flowers? Or maybe punishing her? Or at best maybe it will simply earn her no good will when what she's going to want most at this point is for this whole thing to go away and for her to get a new laptop or whatever. The last way to achieve that is via dissent.

It's not a conspiracy theory to point out that she's not going to want to piss him off. Where the fuck is the conspiracy element in that? I'm saying that she won't feel like she can speak freely. Which is pretty bloody obvious to anyone who stopped to think about it for a second.

Owyn_Merrilin:

thethird0611:

Mortai Gravesend:

You do know that regardless of what his daughter thinks, her only means of communication is him and she's gonna feel like she has to appease him to avoid more punishment, yeah? If she dissented then we really wouldn't know.

So him giving her an offer to make her own video in response, or post something on facebook about it, makes it so she appeases her? He again even told in one of his post that she sat with him and looked at some of the comments on the matter, and she couldnt believe what people were saying. Plain and simple she said she was fine.

Soo... That, and that her friends could always report how she really feels somehow?

Just because there is a conspiracy theory doesnt mean that its true.

http://aconography.blogspot.com/2012/02/parenting-troubled-teen.html

Read this. In fact, everyone who thinks this guy is so wonderful, just read it. It's not a conspiracy theory; this fits a specific profile of abuse.

I read half of it before having to stop because of all the emotional swaying found in that article. Yes, certain images can trigger bad memories in people. Hell, you talk about abuse, I had my father drag me down a flight of stairs by my hair.

But the whole article is 'The daughter DESERVES to be like that because of her age, and the father has no right to correct her (which parents need to do to keep children from thinking they are above their parents), and then punished her by destroying her laptop.

Do you also know that she pulled this stunt before to? He had the talk with her, grounded her, and took away her computer/cell phone/ privileges, and warned her it would get a worse punishment if she did it again.

Mortai Gravesend:

thethird0611:

Mortai Gravesend:

You do know that regardless of what his daughter thinks, her only means of communication is him and she's gonna feel like she has to appease him to avoid more punishment, yeah? If she dissented then we really wouldn't know.

So him giving her an offer to make her own video in response, or post something on facebook about it, makes it so she appeases her? He again even told in one of his post that she sat with him and looked at some of the comments on the matter, and she couldnt believe what people were saying. Plain and simple she said she was fine.

Soo... That, and that her friends could always report how she really feels somehow?

Just because there is a conspiracy theory doesnt mean that its true.

He will be able to monitor anything she says. Suppose she dissents. How do you think he will react? With flowers? Or maybe punishing her? Or at best maybe it will simply earn her no good will when what she's going to want most at this point is for this whole thing to go away and for her to get a new laptop or whatever. The last way to achieve that is via dissent.

It's not a conspiracy theory to point out that she's not going to want to piss him off. Where the fuck is the conspiracy element in that? I'm saying that she won't feel like she can speak freely. Which is pretty bloody obvious to anyone who stopped to think about it for a second.

If she reacts maturely, its pretty obvious in his speech that he would be ok with it. If she starts acting childish, well theres not much more he can punish her with.

You know whats funny? She actually DOES want this whole thing to blow over. Thats why shes staying out of it and speaking some through her father. Go read the post that he put on facebook before you reply with this again. Just so we are on level ground.

And you know, if something was wrong, CPS would of picked it up, or she could speak through one of her friends, or she could do a MILLION things. This is viral now, and trying to keep information from the public is near impossible. Hell, he cant even leave his phone on and his email is full.

Oh, and to say is pretty obvious is only trying to bring your point up while trying to bring my point down. I could say, 'its bloody obvious shes fine if anyone would stop and think about it', but that would discredit intelligent thinking. Yes, there always is a chance, but there is more evidence toward the side of 'shes fine' then to 'shes being mistreated'

hubert:

I find it creepy when you start talking about symbolism, is the daughter going to be the laptop next time or what?

Whenever you feel you need to use a firearm to parent your kid properly, you're doing it WRONG.

By the way did the dad say that he had two jobs and went to high school and college at the same time at her age? I find that hard to believe..
(I might just have misunderstood)

The destruction of the laptop is a symbolic mean for the fact that things you write and say can have consequences. Be it material loss (like in her case) or that you can upset people (like in her case). Since taking away had no impact because she sat it through without long-term understanding of what she did wrong I can't see what the big fuzz is.

EDIT: His daughter has quite the mouth on her and she sounds like she's very ungrateful....so I cant blame her dad for being mad and reading her 'rant' for facebook. But what he did with the gun was so very extreme, nnecessary and a waste of a perfectly good laptop that be paid for himself and upgraded and gave to his daughter. I agree with another on this one:

nikki191:
donating it to a charity would of been a better choise or getting her to do it.

Making her give it away would have a much greater effect on her than destroying it and additionally telling her that if she wants a new one she has to pay for it herself

Ramzal:

Never seen someone so hardheaded in my life. I'd have better luck arguing with a wall.

As an objective bystander, allow me to point out that you're the hard headed idiot who won't listen to reason. Either you're incredibly stupid or trolling.

thethird0611:

Owyn_Merrilin:

thethird0611:

So him giving her an offer to make her own video in response, or post something on facebook about it, makes it so she appeases her? He again even told in one of his post that she sat with him and looked at some of the comments on the matter, and she couldnt believe what people were saying. Plain and simple she said she was fine.

Soo... That, and that her friends could always report how she really feels somehow?

Just because there is a conspiracy theory doesnt mean that its true.

http://aconography.blogspot.com/2012/02/parenting-troubled-teen.html

Read this. In fact, everyone who thinks this guy is so wonderful, just read it. It's not a conspiracy theory; this fits a specific profile of abuse.

I read half of it before having to stop because of all the emotional swaying found in that article. Yes, certain images can trigger bad memories in people. Hell, you talk about abuse, I had my father drag me down a flight of stairs by my hair.

But the whole article is 'The daughter DESERVES to be like that because of her age, and the father has no right to correct her (which parents need to do to keep children from thinking they are above their parents), and then punished her by destroying her laptop.

Do you also know that she pulled this stunt before to? He had the talk with her, grounded her, and took away her computer/cell phone/ privileges, and warned her it would get a worse punishment if she did it again.

To both of your posts: it's not a "stunt" if there really is abuse. People. Need. To. Talk. To. Other. People. When. Shit. Like. This. Happens. The profile here is that the dad has fully isolated his daughter, to the point that the last thing she could do was tell a bunch of people on Facebook, likely none of whom she was very close to, what was going on in her life at the time. As for her wanting it to blow over? Well, which is better: continued existence on the mercy of your abuser, or homelessness and/or death without them? Because that's the situation you wind up in. Even if she's 16, and therefore has a shot with CPS, she may see it as worse for her future to go into foster care. Shit like this is /toxic/.

Owyn_Merrilin:




There we go, I've divided the spoilers up and put tags on them, so maybe now people will read it!

yeah... I don't believe they'll read it, TLDR and all.

JaceArveduin:
[quote="Owyn_Merrilin" post="18.348003.13857803"




[/quote]
There we go, I've divided the spoilers up and put tags on them, so maybe now people will read it!

yeah... I don't believe they'll read it, TLDR and all.

I've already read all of this, and I don't see her reaction anywhere in that spoiler; just what her father says is her reaction. All I'm trying to say here is you can't take the word of an abuser that they are not abusing their child: they lie about things like that, you see.

thethird0611:

Mortai Gravesend:

thethird0611:

So him giving her an offer to make her own video in response, or post something on facebook about it, makes it so she appeases her? He again even told in one of his post that she sat with him and looked at some of the comments on the matter, and she couldnt believe what people were saying. Plain and simple she said she was fine.

Soo... That, and that her friends could always report how she really feels somehow?

Just because there is a conspiracy theory doesnt mean that its true.

He will be able to monitor anything she says. Suppose she dissents. How do you think he will react? With flowers? Or maybe punishing her? Or at best maybe it will simply earn her no good will when what she's going to want most at this point is for this whole thing to go away and for her to get a new laptop or whatever. The last way to achieve that is via dissent.

It's not a conspiracy theory to point out that she's not going to want to piss him off. Where the fuck is the conspiracy element in that? I'm saying that she won't feel like she can speak freely. Which is pretty bloody obvious to anyone who stopped to think about it for a second.

If she reacts maturely, its pretty obvious in his speech that he would be ok with it. If she starts acting childish, well theres not much more he can punish her with.

*facepalm* Or maybe if you actually thought for a microsecond you would realize that if we can see her being childish so can her dad. And yes, there is more he can punish her with. Like continuing to keep her grounded. Or who knows what else, more chores.

You know whats funny? She actually DOES want this whole thing to blow over. Thats why shes staying out of it and speaking some through her father. Go read the post that he put on facebook before you reply with this again. Just so we are on level ground.

You keep trying to point at what she says for proof that she is being honest about it. Anyone with half a brain ought to realize that pointing me at something I just pointed out was trustworthy is the height of stupidity.

And you know, if something was wrong, CPS would of picked it up, or she could speak through one of her friends, or she could do a MILLION things. This is viral now, and trying to keep information from the public is near impossible. Hell, he cant even leave his phone on and his email is full.

*facepalm* Hey dude. Can you read? Right now do it. Go and try and read my posts and see where I said anything about abuse. Oh hey I didn't. Are you trying to bring down my IQ with your posts because it sure feels like it.

Oh, and to say is pretty obvious is only trying to bring your point up while trying to bring my point down. I could say, 'its bloody obvious shes fine if anyone would stop and think about it', but that would discredit intelligent thinking. Yes, there always is a chance, but there is more evidence toward the side of 'shes fine' then to 'shes being mistreated'

Your entire post has already been a disservice to intelligent thinking. I didn't say anything about mistreatment I've just been saying that if she doesn't like what he did she has no way to say it freely without him seeing and perhaps applying consequences.

Regnes:

Ramzal:

What is wrong with you people? This man just put 9 rounds into a stationary object because he was angry. Let me repeat myself; This man just unloaded a -gun- into a computer because he was angry. He has every right to punish his daughter, but this shows complete and total lack of control and discipline over himself by using a firearm to teach a lesson.

He lost count in how many bullets fired at that, because of his anger! And people support this? A gun is not a toy, it's a tool. A last resort and used to protect, not destroy. I've seen comments on this saying "An all American dad!" Are you people crazy or just plan stupid? Comments like that is exactly why our country is looked down on as gun tooting/war hungry morons! His entire point goes out the window when he shows how childish (Retaliating to her internet post--it's an internet post for crying out loud) with the use of a gun.

And people say the young are stupid.

I'm sorry, but you are a part of the cancer that is killing your country. First off, he was angry, but in total control, he didn't do it in blind rage, it was a calm and collected method of punishing his daughter. He didn't just whip out his gun and start unloading rounds all over the place, he did it in a completely safe and responsible manner ensuring that the only thing that got hurt was the laptop.

Since he wasn't using the gun dangerously or out of blind rage, how is it any different than any other method to break the laptop?

You say guns aren't toys, well how do you use that logic to justify that things such as hunting, shooting ranges, skeet shooting and such are all socially acceptable forms of recreational entertainment. Guns are to all intents and purposes just expensive toys for those pastimes.

As for the punishment itself, his daughter is a brat, that was a very brutal message she left in public view for everybody to see. He said he grounded her before for a similar offense, he said he warned her that the next time she would do more than just lose her laptop for a while. She went ahead and disrespected her entire family over some trivial bullshit, and she paid the price.

He paid for everything with his money, so it's hard to even call the laptop hers in the first place, he was just destroying his own property.

'Guns are expensive toys'

My god, just how stupid are you?

Guns are weapons made to kill in the most cost effective manner possible, they are not and never will be toys, they were invented as a tool of war, they are to this day a tool of war, their usage in hunting for sport harkens back to when we had to go out and kill things for food.

On the rest I'm pretty much with you, the usage of a firearm on her property is a tad excessive though, he would have been better to sell it. It would have sent a better message.

 Pages PREV 1 . . . 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 . . . 20 NEXT

Reply to Thread

This thread is locked