So some woman are afraid of me because of my job....

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Right so, my job? I'm a carpentry apprentice. I help build houses. Im not a builder, but people who don't know what that means would throw me under that name and I do build houses sometimes. Mostly I do Rennovations...which I hate so much, nothings square and the old walls are filled with spiders and dust.

So, like first off, I notice a massive difference in the way people treat me in my work clothes, people seem...a little afraid of me. I have seen plenty of women notice me when I am working close to the street or going to get a tool from the van and when they do, they cross the street. Sure some of them were probably planning to do that anyway, but It happens a lot and I can never shake that feeling that they are expecting me to grope them or something.

Some of that is likely paranoia. I know for a fact at least one woman thinks that way, my sister told me how her friend actually said to her(not knowing what her brother and father did) that she was always afraid walking past building sites that the builders were going to rape her. She actually said rape, not the stereotypical catcalling or whatever, this person thinks we are rapists!

Im not ugly or scary looking either, women are very friendly to me when Im not in my workclothes. It can be pretty uncanny the difference. I am young and women do find me attractive, I dont have any of the other things people typically assosciate with intimidating like tatoos and piercings.

Theres other things too. People seem to think im tough because of my job and would be good in a fight(Yes my job does keep me fit but strength means nothing when you have zero experience, I havent thrown a real punch since primary school.)

Ill admit, there are some people in my industry that do nothing but drink, fight and think of nothing but fucking in their free time. Yet they are the minority and most of us are actually professionals who just want to do our job. People being afraid of us cant be good for us if people are actually too afraid to hire a contractor to fix their house or whatever.

Im kinda rambling here... So people of the escapist, especially women. What do you think when you see a builder, or a labourer or tradesman of any other job. Am I just being paranoid for the most part?

Classism runs very deep with some people, yeah.

Usually when i see a builder i think "hey, there's a builder." it's only when someone has a creepy look about them that i'll cross the road away from them.

I judge on how I read that person (Which I'm fairly good at). If I see someone wearing a hoodie, cap, hunched over with their hands in their pockets, I would avoid that kind of individual.

If I saw someone in overalls, visibility jacket, boots and a hard hat, working on an extension. I would just think that it's another regular person doing their job, hopefully doing it right and the only other thought I would make is "I hope they do that person who is paying them good money a good job". We got a problem with rogue builders in the UK..... No offence to anyone who takes pride in their work really, I like a job done properly.

This made me think of a nice, heartwarming story my Dad e-mailed me a few days ago.

OT: I think it is a bit ridiculous, sometimes workmen can look a little intimidating but to actually be afraid of them is a bit much. That said, I'm a fairly big bloke and I can give them a nob and a "Alright mate" as I pass which is usually returned in a friendly manner. Don't get bummed out about it, just smile and nod at the ones that don't cross, in this day and age a smile from a stranger in the street is the sort of thing that makes you feel fuzzy inside.

Can I ask whereabouts you work? If you're in Britain, I think the attitude is different depending on which side of Birmingham you're on.

Zantos:
This made me think of a nice, heartwarming story my Dad e-mailed me a few days ago.

OT: I think it is a bit ridiculous, sometimes workmen can look a little intimidating but to actually be afraid of them is a bit much. That said, I'm a fairly big bloke and I can give them a nob and a "Alright mate" as I pass which is usually returned in a friendly manner. Don't get bummed out about it, just smile and nod at the ones that don't cross, in this day and age a smile from a stranger in the street is the sort of thing that makes you feel fuzzy inside.

Can I ask whereabouts you work? If you're in Britain, I think the attitude is different depending on which side of Birmingham you're on.

That story was brilliant I must say.

OT: They could just be doing what I do, if I see a building site with a lot of men near the footpath or going back and forth to get tools and such, I switch to the other side of the road to not obstruct them.
Most builders (or tradies as they are called here) are pretty layed back guys that women seem to have an immense hard on for some reason. However if you don a Hoody around these parts, prepared to get looks of fear from elderly people. Once as I was walking to school with my hood on (it was drizzling a bit, didn't want to get wet since it was a long walk) and this old couple was walking infront of me, they would constantly look over their shoulders with a fearful look.

Zantos:
This made me think of a nice, heartwarming story my Dad e-mailed me a few days ago.

OT: I think it is a bit ridiculous, sometimes workmen can look a little intimidating but to actually be afraid of them is a bit much. That said, I'm a fairly big bloke and I can give them a nob and a "Alright mate" as I pass which is usually returned in a friendly manner. Don't get bummed out about it, just smile and nod at the ones that don't cross, in this day and age a smile from a stranger in the street is the sort of thing that makes you feel fuzzy inside.

Can I ask whereabouts you work? If you're in Britain, I think the attitude is different depending on which side of Birmingham you're on.

That story was hilarious. Thats the sort of thing I'd believe really happened.
I'm an Australian. Specifically I work in the city of Launceston in the state of Tasmania. Lovely state, much colder than the rest of Australia in winter but less hot too. It's actually compared to England in climate a lot. Less rain though.

I guess that's all there is to it. Just be nice and try to change people's opinions. It feels good to vent these worries somewhere.

Fieldy409:

Im kinda rambling here... So people of the escapist, especially women. What do you think when you see a builder, or a labourer or tradesman of any other job. Am I just being paranoid for the most part?

I'm a woman.
You've just made me really paranoid about offending builders.
See, I normally do cross the road, if there is scaffolding. I have this thing about walking under scaffolding, I hate doing it, so I'll cross the street in order to avoid doing it. I hope the people working on those buildings dont think I think they are rapists.

Otherwise, I've always found builders to be very friendly to me, but if I had been catcalled I might be a little more defensive. But mostly I dont pay attention, really. Though I wont walk between a van and a wall if I can avoid it, seen too much TV, I always expect the door to fly open and get grabbed. XD

I wouldn't get offended, if I were you, if people are scared it's not to do with you, it's their deal.

Phasmal:

Fieldy409:

Im kinda rambling here... So people of the escapist, especially women. What do you think when you see a builder, or a labourer or tradesman of any other job. Am I just being paranoid for the most part?

I'm a woman.
You've just made me really paranoid about offending builders.
See, I normally do cross the road, if there is scaffolding. I have this thing about walking under scaffolding, I hate doing it, so I'll cross the street in order to avoid doing it. I hope the people working on those buildings dont think I think they are rapists.

Otherwise, I've always found builders to be very friendly to me, but if I had been catcalled I might be a little more defensive. But mostly I dont pay attention, really. Though I wont walk between a van and a wall if I can avoid it, seen too much TV, I always expect the door to fly open and get grabbed. XD

I wouldn't get offended, if I were you, if people are scared it's not to do with you, it's their deal.

That's fair enough and I don't think I'd be worried about that. Never worked on a scaffold over the top of a walkway. The homes here have a lot of yard space. Never been on one of the big jobs in the city centre either .

People are pointing out a lot of reasons to cross the street I didn't think of. Maybe I have been quick to judge some people.

Strange man, probably strong from his line of work, knows the place inside and out, has a perfectly legitimate reason to be in the environment handling equipment unfamiliar to the general public?

And that's without the group acts of sexual objectification towards women that comes with the builder stereotype.

No, it is not fair to men to have to deal with women suspecting them of being possible rapists, but rape is too real a threat to not be paranoid.
I'm sorry things are this way, and I'm very sorry that its worse when you're dressed for your job, but please, bear with us women. We don't like it, either.

I'm not sure where you're from, but in Australia, pretty much the fastest way to get in a girls pants is to mention you're a "tradie."

at least they don't think you are gay! (not being rude) I study childcare and some girls in my class though I was. It kinda sucked

LooK iTz Jinjo:
I'm not sure where you're from, but in Australia, pretty much the fastest way to get in a girls pants is to mention you're a "tradie."

Something I will never understand.

Wow, she expects to get raped? That's a bit weird. I'll cross the street if there's scaffolding or I'm likely to be getting in the way of people working, but that's a courtesy/safety thing, nothing to do with the builders themselves. If I get cat called walking one way I may come back on the opposite side of the street to avoid embarrassment, but otherwise builders are just builders, right? Just trying to do their job for the most part.

imahobbit4062:

LooK iTz Jinjo:
I'm not sure where you're from, but in Australia, pretty much the fastest way to get in a girls pants is to mention you're a "tradie."

Something I will never understand.

It perpetuates the whole stereotype of a handiman who can fix shit round the house, I have a few friends who are plumbers, paints, plasters etc. it's pretty good to just be able to call them up, have it done quick and all I have to pay is parts, plus a carton of beer. Women (here at least) seem to like the idea of a man who's good with tools and all that crap.

Here in Sweden, socialist hellhole that it is, 'class' doesn't really mean shit.
There's rich people living happily in cheap-ass 3 room apartments, and no one cares.
Our celebrities, at least some of them, goes to supermarkets with the rest of us.
Besides, the carpentry profession doesn't even have that kind of social stigma here to begin with.

I don't judge builders in general, my dad grew up helping his dad with building work, even for a few years after he became an adult, so you'd imagine he'd be a stereotypical builder, as that's all he did for 20-odd years, but he's the head of science at a secondary school, and literally the most intelligent man I know (we gave him a A-level further maths book for his last birthday, it was his favourite present)

I know exactly how you feel, OP. I used to work in retail and I never had a problem, I wasn't even aware of the fact that people might be afraid of me until one day I worked with this one lady and she literally looked like she had seen a ghost. Her hands would shake and everything, every time I had to hand her something. It just made me feel really self conscious that someone would be so afraid of me when I knew I was in no way a bad person. I know she was afraid of me specifically because I'd seen her working with other people just fine. And I'm, not to boast but not a bad looking guy myself. I think that police officers have to deal with this a lot - especially because their uniform is designed with intimidation in mind - it must suck.

Zantos:
This made me think of a nice, heartwarming story my Dad e-mailed me a few days ago.

OT: I think it is a bit ridiculous, sometimes workmen can look a little intimidating but to actually be afraid of them is a bit much. That said, I'm a fairly big bloke and I can give them a ___nob___ and a "Alright mate" as I pass which is usually returned in a friendly manner. Don't get bummed out about it, just smile and nod at the ones that don't cross, in this day and age a smile from a stranger in the street is the sort of thing that makes you feel fuzzy inside.

Can I ask whereabouts you work? If you're in Britain, I think the attitude is different depending on which side of Birmingham you're on.

I dunno how to bold letters on this forum so I put underscores to show off your rather funny typo. lol

michael87cn:
I know exactly how you feel, OP. I used to work in retail and I never had a problem, I wasn't even aware of the fact that people might be afraid of me until one day I worked with this one lady and she literally looked like she had seen a ghost. Her hands would shake and everything, every time I had to hand her something. It just made me feel really self conscious that someone would be so afraid of me when I knew I was in no way a bad person. I know she was afraid of me specifically because I'd seen her working with other people just fine. And I'm, not to boast but not a bad looking guy myself. I think that police officers have to deal with this a lot - especially because their uniform is designed with intimidation in mind - it must suck.

Zantos:
This made me think of a nice, heartwarming story my Dad e-mailed me a few days ago.

OT: I think it is a bit ridiculous, sometimes workmen can look a little intimidating but to actually be afraid of them is a bit much. That said, I'm a fairly big bloke and I can give them a ___nob___ and a "Alright mate" as I pass which is usually returned in a friendly manner. Don't get bummed out about it, just smile and nod at the ones that don't cross, in this day and age a smile from a stranger in the street is the sort of thing that makes you feel fuzzy inside.

Can I ask whereabouts you work? If you're in Britain, I think the attitude is different depending on which side of Birmingham you're on.

I dunno how to bold letters on this forum so I put underscores to show off your rather funny typo. lol

Haha, I completely missed that! Weird... I don't think I have sex with builders...

I do it to. I'm not a woman, nor scared of workers, just a matter of having a preference to give anyone working a wide berth. They have a job to do, and it's a pretty standard mindset that when there's work going on that doesn't involve you, you keep clear.

LooK iTz Jinjo:

imahobbit4062:
[quote="LooK iTz Jinjo" post="18.352922.13996449"]I'm not sure where you're from, but in Australia, pretty much the fastest way to get in a girls pants is to mention you're a "tradie."

Something I will never understand.

It perpetuates the whole stereotype of a handiman who can fix shit round the house, I have a few friends who are plumbers, paints, plasters etc. it's pretty good to just be able to call them up, have it done quick and all I have to pay is parts, plus a carton of beer. Women (here at least) seem to like the idea of a man who's good with tools and all that crap.[/quote

It also doesn't hurt that overall 'Tradies' get a pretty good gnaw on the bone in Australia due to a mixture of strong political clout and a mining industry that can't seem to get enough of them.

You should try wolf whistling ironically.

Where the hell are you from?

If anything would think people cross the street just because of a sense of politeness, that's what i would do.

Not being a woman, I can't speak on this with any certainty. However, often if I come across some construction happening next to the footpath or the road, I'll cross over to the other side (or at least give a wide berth) just so there's no chance of me getting in the way or even accidentally hit by something. So, perhaps that's a reason for some women too.

Looks at OP's profile pic. Yep dont see where they're coming from. But no seriously it seems ridiculous to suspect all people who look like builders, carpenters etc of being rapists or potential rapists any more than your regular straight man. While rape is a serious thing I dont see why women as a whole would avoid you or be that wary of it in open daylight, in public.

well, the worst thing i can think of is a builder screwing up and dropping something on me because the builders around my areas don't know what the hell they are doing

but that's just my area, in most areas i have been to builders are quite decent and not savages who 'bravely' disregard all safety regulations

My father used to do the same when he was younger. Luckily it didn't scare my mother or I wouldn't be typing this.
He never told me that women looked at him differently but then again, that was in a different time.

That's a weird story. What country do you live in? I don't know if that type of thing would happen here but I probably wouldn't notice if it did.

DarkRyter:
You should try wolf whistling ironically.

I laughed hard.

I help run a business that deals in your line of work OP, i.e. construction, and I've had a couple of female clients ask me if my workers are "thieves or perverts?".

It does get to you sometimes, but there's a stigma in all types of career choices.

Accountants? boring farts
Marketing Men? Coke heads
Charity Workers? hippies
Footballers? overpaid pampered babies (this one happens to be true)
Journalists? snooping fuckwads

Do you wear a hat, and one of those tool belts? Are you shirtless, because maybe they are sexually intimidated! I don't think I've ever seen anything like that happen- maybe its the area you are in?

I usually cross the road if I'm on the same side as a builder, because I don't want to get in their way if they need to go to their van. For me it's just more of a convenience to us both to cross the road.

thaluikhain:
Classism runs very deep with some people, yeah.

The fun part is that builders get paid rather well. Better than 90% of the people likely to be walking past the site anyway.

Phasmal:

I'm a woman.
You've just made me really paranoid about offending builders.
See, I normally do cross the road, if there is scaffolding. I have this thing about walking under scaffolding, I hate doing it, so I'll cross the street in order to avoid doing it. I hope the people working on those buildings dont think I think they are rapists.

Yeah, I kinda gotta second this. I'll usually avoid workers because I don't want to get in their way. It's not that I'm afraid of them (my boyfriend does similar stuff and usually comes home pretty rough and dirty from work... I'll admit, I like it) I just don't want to be a bother. But now I feel sort of bad, I hope nobody thought I was avoiding them out of fear.

That said, I can't say most women think this way. From what I've seen there really is some level of unease around "working men." As I said, my boyfriend does similar work and I've noticed that depending on what he's wearing people react differently to him upon introduction. If he's dressed up nice, shaved, so on, it's all well and good. If he's just come home from work and hasn't had a chance to clean up you can sort of feel that unease, or even that, "Oh, blue collar..." sort of vibe. I'd agree with the first commenter, classism runs deep in some people.

I usually cross the road because I feel like I'm getting in the way if they're going back and forth to their van, like you're saying. I think your sister's friend is just a weird one, I don't think that opinion is one that would be common.

Or maybe they just watch "Holmes on Homes" so they're afraid of you installing plumbing incorrectly.

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