That awkward moment when...

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...you go to the handicap stall to do your business, come out, and see a handicapped person waiting.

Yep, it's this thread again! I figured I start a new one since awkward moments happen quite frequently to us all, and I find them hilarious.
So please share any awkward moments you have had recently (or not so recently) or some especially notable ones (like the one above)

Here's another:
That awkward moment when you think "hey, I'll make a thread!" but then consider that someone may have posted it already, search the forums and see that they have, but since its been a while, you figure "oh well!"

That awkward moment when you read the topic title, and immediately type out a long, out-pouring of emotion and bitterness, only to find that either A) you completely missed the point of the topic, or B) the cause of all your emotional turmoil is/was completely false.

That awkward moment when you do the above, twice.

Mafoobula:
That awkward moment when you read the topic title, and immediately type out a long, out-pouring of emotion and bitterness, only to find that either A) you completely missed the point of the topic, or B) the cause of all your emotional turmoil is/was completely false.

That awkward moment when you do the above, twice.

Lol, I've had that happen before.
It seems silly to go over and proof read a post to see if it stays on topic and addresses the issue(s)...

Th3Ch33s3Cak3:
That awkward moment when you're sitting on a deserted bus and the next passenger sits right next to you.

Man, I fucking HATE that. Its almost as bad as when a bunch of people get off the bus, there are many open seats, and the person beside you doesn't move to sit at the open seat. Its like "UGH! MOVE GODDAMNIT"

That awkward moment when there is a 3 way tie at a mini roundabout... You know the one... where everyone has the right of way... and everyone is trying to let the others go... and then you stick your foot down to go, but someone else does too, and you both stop, and it all gets really pointless!

That awkward moment when your fart isn't quite a fart.

Ahhh awkward moments.

Going to a urinal and, despite there being 5 empty ones, the next bloke stands right next to you and starts trying to strike up a conversation.

To all blokes that do that .... the very last place I want to be holding a conversation is over a porcelain bowl while i'm holding my cock.

That awkward moment when half the avatars are broken >.>.

EDIT: Not anymore >.<.

That awkward moment where you finished the milk and someone else comes in to have a bowl of cereal :P

That awkward moment when a guy walks up to you, asks you when the next train comes, then proceeds to rant to you about how smoking ruins your life, if you sin you should repent to Jesus and how you don't want to go to Satan's fiery kingdom in the centre of the Earth.

Ah, drunks.

That awkward moment when 11 out of 25 threads on the front page of R&P are made by two people.

Eh, probably the most awkward moment I've had was when I went out in Cardiff on a night where there was a game on...these four guys in kilts walked up to us absolutely mashed, and proceeded to tell my friend's gf how much they loved her & how amazing she was, whilst challenging us to a fight.

That awkward moment when you sit and talk about a chicks boobs that sits in front of you at your nantive language at the other side of the globe and when the train stops she stands up and thanks you for the compliment in that very same language.

... when you tell a joke or a funny anecdote and nobody laughs.

"Well... anyway, I thought it was pretty funny..."

That awkward moment when you go to walk into someone, and you both step aside in the same direction to let the other go past, only to block each other again.

Even more awkward after the second or third time in a row.

I know somebody already said something about smoking but that awkward moment when...

-you're minding your own business smoking, well AWAY from a crowd and a guy walks right up to you and starts to lecture you about second hand smoke.

-Somebody is waving and you wave back but realize they were waving to the person behind you.

-You go in to shake someones hand but they go for a fist bump

-You're alone with a friend/date in a movie theatre and somebody decides to sit right behind or infront of you, like seriously wtf?

-You take the last slice of pizza without asking

-You think your girlfriend is cheating on you when its just her brother you haven't met

-Your girlfriend sets you up on a play date with her father and you're complete opposites

-Your shoelace unties right in a busy walkway so you just keep walking until you find a good an area where you won't be in the way.

-I can't think of anymore awkward moments

That awkward moment when you're at a public library and the person next to you is watching porn

The awkward moment when someone's talking quite loud on a goddamn public bus, yet everyone, including you, are too scared or polite to tell them to SHUT THE FUCK UP.

The awkward moment when you're stopped by a man in the street giving out amusing dollar notes with, like, Homer Simpson on the front or something, and then you turn it over and read some bullshit about Jesus Christ.

The awkward moment when you're saying something and then realize that no-one's actually listening.

The awkward moment when you're having one of those "Who would you rather do?" conversations with your friend, and then your friend asks you, "Who would you rather do? [Insert female friend here] or [Insert other female friend here]?", and the female friends are part of the damn conversation.

That awkward moment when you fall over in the street, and being alone, try to get up and walk it off (even though it really hurts).

I don't have awkward moments. I make moments awkward.

Every now and then, if I'm bored and I'm with a friend, I'll loudly ask him/her something crazy. Most recently, I like to use the opening question: "Do you think fingering is old-fashioned?"

Then I have the perverse joy of looking around to see who looks embarrassed or is suddenly deep in thought.

That awkward moment when you just started working in a new place and some fat guy comes to lecture you about the way you work, you tell him to mind his own business and later you find out that hes the owner.

That awkward moment where your new colleague, from a culture that says the family name first, compensates for your culture without telling only for you to then compensate for theirs so absolutely nothing is achieved.

Zhukov:
... when you tell a joke or a funny anecdote and nobody laughs.

"Well... anyway, I thought it was pretty funny..."

That awkward moment when you show someone a hilarious video, and it is greeted with silence.

Your thought process as this happens:

Nobody's laughing... I hope they don't get impatient. Says "okay, wait for the good part, guys!"

Good part occurs. No laughter. You let out a nervous chuckle.

The video's going on and on. No laughter. Dear God, how could I ever have enjoyed this? I'm a fool! Abort! Abort!

I can never enjoy this video again...

Lionsfan:
That awkward moment when you're at a public library and the person next to you is watching porn

That awkward moment when you're watching porn in the public library, trying to get out a crafty one under the table, but are very put off by the person next to you who keeps glancing at you.

That awkward moment when you receive a court summons due to "abuse of library property, and indecent public exposure." The philistines...

Have a nice day!

That awkward moment when you fart in court. >.>

The awkward moment when the majority of thickies I have the misfortune of knowing endlessly spout nonsense about the amount of 'awkward' moments they have in life on Facebook, and I have to spend the best part of half an hour explaining to them that rocks are not awkward, and that they don't have a cunting clue what awkward actually fucking means.

Edit: Just to pre-emptively counter your claims that I am a hypocrite, the awkwardness from this anecdote comes from the fact that nobody likes you when you educate them and inform them of their mistakes.

That awkward moment when you find that a mudcrab has killed you in Oblivion. Lesson learned, never leave the game running while you go to the bathroom.

Th3Ch33s3Cak3:

That awkward moment when your friend tells you "brb" and is gone for 10 hours.

I knew a friend who was like "brb, kettles boiled!" over Teamspeak. He hasn't returned yet.
...He said that in January. 2011, but I have hope!

t

Whitbane:
That awkward moment when you go to walk into someone, and you both step aside in the same direction to let the other go past, only to block each other again.

Even more awkward after the second or third time in a row.

Third? I wish - I've reached 7 before. Because you stop dodging at the same time they stop dodging, and then you both start side-stepping at the same time again, god...
Even worse when I'm running, and they are running in the other direction, we both try and move out of the way while continuing to run, and it turns into a game of chicken until one of stops and jumps into the nearby front garden. Then there's that bonus stage of awkwardness when we both jump into that same garden, with the house owner there. We can't escape, because we keep dodging into each other D:

Fappy:
That awkward moment when you fart in court. >.>

That awkwarder moment when they find out that you masturbate in court...
Moral of the story: Running is serious business.

DugMachine:
Somebody is waving and you wave back but realize they were waving to the person behind you.

That awkward moment when you've been ninja'd and have nothing else to say.

That akward moment when you vomit all over the check out chick whose number you just scored its was followed the the funny moment of some one sliping over it

That awkward moment when you go to take a piss in a public bathroom, and in the middle of it you realize there are no urinals....oops.

That awkward moment when you tell the punchline to a joke and people nearby didn't know it was a joke.

'...Getting the blood off of your clown suit!'

The awkward moment when the bronie you've been threatening turns out to be a really polite girl....

That awkward moment when a Mormon guy come to the door and you want to run and hide but you think he saw you. Then you have to talk to him and lie and say you'll come to his church when you really are an atheist, only for him to see right through your lie and call you out on it.

That awkward moment when you are talking to someone and say off-hand about wales and all of a sudden your welsh friend is yelling at you for offending welsh people.

That awkward moment when you are talking to a girl and all of a sudden she starts bending over in front of you, and then gets back up again without warning, seeing you stare at her boobs.

When you talk to a girl in short shorts or busty girl with a low cut top and you can't help but stare.

That awkward moment when the last words a girl said to you before they moved away was that your a pedophile.

when you fart silently and you're trying not to giggle.

when you joking tell someone who is nervous "I'm not going to eat you" and they freak out more or worse, seem disappointed.

when you are sparing with your crush at kickboxing class and she opens with a groin shot.

when you can't remember your new bosses name.

when you screw up simple math and someone has to correct you.

when you have a hard on and are called upon to perform the Heimlich maneuver. (unrelated I swear)

when the gal you used the Heimlich on doesn't notice.

That awkward moment when you tell someone how annoying someone else is and that person comes by.

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