Stuff you thought when you were a Kid

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When you are a kid you make assumptions about things and it turns out that it not the case.(ok its a nice way of saying stupid things you thought when your were a kid)

For example i thought that lava lamps had actually had lava in them. I was a bit dissapointed when this wasnt true, it would rather cool idea of people collective lava for lava lamps.

Ok this one is a little more weird, I would hover over the loo because i was afraid a vampire might come out of it. Oh i was such a special child.

Oh and i was afraid of pools in the dark because it might have a whale in it, and it might eat me. Yeah another weird one and to this day i find whales creepy.

Now that we have established that i am crazy,
lets hear your tales of childhood thoughts.

I thought that the people on TV could see me while they were acting, so I never changed clothes in front of the TV

I thought when actors ( i knew they were act ) on tv died , they died for real . So i thought that when some guy got shot and died , he was asked before lhand if he wanted to die and he said yes .

Edit: so basically i was always afraid of watching a tv show where someone died ( my mom watches soap operas like crazy) i thought i was witnessing an actual murder.

krazykidd:
I thought when actors ( i knew they were act ) on tv died , they died for real . So i thought that when some guy got shot and died , he was asked before lhand if he wanted to die and he said yes .

Edit: so basically i was always afraid of watching a tv show where someone died ( my mom watches soap operas like crazy) i thought i was witnessing an actual murder.

Wow that is pretty bad, I have to say i feel really sorry for you. Must of traumatized you a fair bit.

This was a common one.

I think color didn't exist in the world until it was invented on the televisions.

I kept feeling sorry for people who lived long ago. Because they didn't have color.

when i was a wee lad, i had a pathological fear of street cleaners, those huge vehicles scared me witless D:

I thought the past was in black and white.
I thought babies came from the belly button and you would make babies by kissing.
and I thought that jackets that were yellow could kill people ( I heard on the news that someone got killed by yellow jackets, I didn't know they were talking about a wasp)
and I thought that tacos used to make you walk bow legged. Don't ask me how I came to that conclusion because I honestly don't know.

I thought that people only had a certain number of times that they could blink in their life, and once they hit that number, they would just sit there with their eyes open for the rest of their life.

I thought I would get sick and die if I walked barefoot in our basement.

I also thought girls had nothing between their legs, like just a random flat strip of skin

Tsekatsu:
I thought the past was in black and white.

Yep. I knew it was common.

Our generation, or rather, a couple generations possibly, sure had a funny sensation.

Oh i got another one . I thought if i slept on my back , during the night my parents would come in the room think i was dead and bury me alive . Ao i NEVER under any circumstance went to sleep laying on my back .

Yeah , i was a dumb kid , incidentally i am a dumb adult .

I was really confuzzled about sex as a kid. My parents never really told me anything, so I kind of figured everything out by process of elimination, as well as subtle hints about such things when they were mentioned in conversation between older people and on TV.
I also never stumbled onto porn as a kid, since I was far more interested in Homestarrunner.com and games when I finally started regularly using computers.

I had this crazy idea that all cars ran on a rail like system, like trains but on the road instead. I also used to think that computers could be fixed if I repeatedly turned them on and off. Ah youth.

I was read "The Hobbit" before I figured out how higher numbers worked, so until I went to school I called everything above 110 eleventy-something. What I called 100 - 109 and 200+ I have no idea. Probably didn't even register.

I thought that pencils were harmless.

-1 surgery later-

I don't think I want to play with pencils anymore...

Like the OP, I was afraid to swim in 3 feet water because I thought that a super speedy crocodile would come over and chomp off my legs.

Tsekatsu:
I thought the past was in black and white.

Thank God, I'm not alone.

OT: I thought black people rubbed off...

I also thought my sister invented the word, "shit", because she was the first one I heard say it. I actually bragged about it in preschool.

I used to watch the Liverpool matches with my dad when I was a tot and thought that if I screamed loud enough at the TV like he did they could hear me.

Sad thing is, even though I know they can't hear me I still shout at the bloody TV to this day.

Boy, you had messed up childhoods. All of you!

Joking, joking.
Although

Launcelot111:
I thought that people only had a certain number of times that they could blink in their life, and once they hit that number, they would just sit there with their eyes open for the rest of their life.

That's pretty weird assumption to make. What the hell?

OT: Well, let's see, when I was really young I didn't know what shadows were, mostly people ones (I keep thinking I was 3 at that point but I could have been 2). I didn't really pay them much attention until the evening when my parents turn on the night lamp which made their shadows really big on the walls. And then I noticed the shadows moved as they moved. I wasn't scared or anything just genuinely curious what they were. After a while pondering it I finally asked my father what the thing on the wall was. I was disappointed when I found out that shadows weren't, in fact, sentient beings nor did they choose to act the same way other people acted just because it was amusing.

My kindergarten was two storeys high. Both of them were identical. And the toilets and the are with all the washing sinks were next to each other (obviously) so my logical conclusion was that the second floor got all the clean water, while the first floor used whatever the second floor flushed down in the toilets. I was really happy when I got to be on the second floor.

Sort of related - the kindergarten had some sort of chair on one of the second floor balconies. It was one of those high bar chairs. Or something similar, because basically it looked like a wheel when you caught just a little glimpse of it. There was a rumour among the kindergarten kids that the building was actually a giant automobile and could go at any time. Obviously, they used the wheel for steering.

As kids, we believed there was a crazy murderous lunatic in an abandoned hotel in our neighbourhood. We had to sneak in and keep an eye on him in case he went on a killing spree. And by "sneak in" I mean, "risk our lives and health every day over an figment of our imagination". See, we had "secret headquarters" in the hotel. Represented at the time, as one of the rooms on the second floor. How we got to the second floor was to go up the stairs on the side and then make our way across an extremely narrow ledge (barely enough for the width of our feet. We were a also 9-10 year old at the time) with a smooth wall on one side and 4-5 meter drop onto solid concrete on the other side until we reached the balcony of the terrace of the first room. Going out was the same thing in reverse. At least I can say that nobody was murdered on our watch!

More related. Same time. We had another "secret headquarters". We raised grasshoppers and other insects there. And by "raise", I mean "we caught them, released them in the room and we also put some grass there because that's obviously what they ate". Right, I should mention that our "HQ" was a room at the ground floor of the block of flats next door to mine. also, the "secret" part was because it was locked....well, locked until we got inside, anyway. Despite the fact that there were huge windows on two out of the three walls (the windows were 2.5 metres high, 1m above the ground). It didn't stay secret for long.

When I was a child, I used to be really paranoid. I thought that everybody that knew my parents, reported everything I've done directly to them. My grandparents included. That kept me on my best behaviour around other people.

I thought that certain actions had age restrictions. For example, you couldn't spit until he was 6 years old, or you couldn't tie your shoes until you were 4. I must have been really young then. But I have no idea how I got to the exact age when things became "legal", I just knew it.

I used to think that if I walked alone with my mother, people would naturally assume I was her husband. Because she was a woman and I was a man.

I used to be really afraid of heights. Really afraid. If I looked down from a window it was fine but if there wasn't anything between me and the free fall to the ground I couldn't stop imagining slipping and ending down on the ground broken and dead. If I looked down from our balcony, I always held on to something in case I fell. But it didn't help my fear, because if I held tightly enough, I just ended up imagining my head will fall off if I leaned out.

I thought that before color TV, the world was black and white.

I also used to think I could use a plastic bag (like one you'd get from a grocery store) could be used as a parachute if I jumped from high enough.

I also thought when my brother and I fought, the fighting would create a large dust cloud that would cover us.

I used to think that by blowing on a dandelion, I could wish the dinosaurs back to life (and I was big on dinosaurs when I was younger).

Yes, I realize that dinosaurs existing now is probably a bad thing, but I never said I was a smart kid...

That if I was underwater too long in my pool, a shark would eat me. I guess you could say I still have a slight fear of open spands of water, not knowing what's in there..

Audemas:
I thought that before color TV, the world was black and white.

I also used to think I could use a plastic bag (like one you'd get from a grocery store) could be used as a parachute if I jumped from high enough.

I also thought when my brother and I fought, the fighting would create a large dust cloud that would cover us.

I used to think the plastic bag one as well. I even tested it a few times...

I was told that if you picked a dandelion you would wet the bed that night. Hence the affectionate term 'pissy bed flowers'.

I thought 100 was the highest number.

I thought that stepping on glass was fatal. I would flip out and start screaming at the sight of broken glass.

That a hundred years ago, the world was in black and white.

krazykidd:
I thought when actors ( i knew they were act ) on tv died , they died for real . So i thought that when some guy got shot and died , he was asked before lhand if he wanted to die and he said yes .

Edit: so basically i was always afraid of watching a tv show where someone died ( my mom watches soap operas like crazy) i thought i was witnessing an actual murder.

so essentially everything was a sunuff film :P

I thourght Dinosours could possably be hanging out in some underground cave land

When playing cops and robbers, cowboys and indians or some other game that involved toy guns. I thought that raising your hands into the air made you unable to be hit by bullets.

Also speaking of playing gun games, did anyone do this as a kid.

You and your friend are playing with toy guns, your friend shoots you and says. "I shot you." To which you respond with one of the following. "Nuh uh, I had my hands up." Or no it didn't the bullet just missed me."

I thought my toys would get up to no good, when I was asleep or out of my bedroom.

I thought videogame characters would talk to each other, when a video game was paused.

Like many in this thread, I thought the past was in black & white.

As for other things, I thought that we had visited every planet in our solar system. I was curious as to why we were not populating all the other planets.

I thought that if you breathed in while the wind was blowing, you'd suffocate.

Holy crap, FIVE people so far thought the world was black and white before colour tv. How did you all get this idea?

I'm not sure, because I don't have the best memory, but I guess I was something of an oddball in that I didn't really think anything like that when I was a kid. Maybe it was not having cable TV until I was 9, books made the divide between fiction and reality a little clearer. Or maybe my imagination was below par, I dunno.

I thought that my stuffed toys on my bed at night moved when I was asleep, because they would sometimes be in different positions when I woke up... like neatly aranged in the corner by the wall, or all over the bed in what looked like some sort of scene...

It was years before I found out that I moved them in my sleep... (found that out the night I went to bed with a penknife on the bedside table, and woke up with what is now a scar on my stomach... :S)

that the NPC's were actually people and that some just had no idea how to move

I thought that being a teacher would be a good job. Fortunately, I realised that I hate kids before I'd finished high school.

I thought that the moon was a hole in the sky that lead to heaven, and that's why it glowed.

I believed that if I turned off the TV it would pause the show while I was gone.

I thought Gem from the kid's TV show was Barbie since they look so much alike.

Because I saw cartoon characters get fatally hurt and get back up I didn't think people died. I actually had to be sat down and told what death was.

I thought that both girls and boys had a penis (I had never actually SEEN a penis, I just thought that everyone had one without really understanding what it was.)
Oddly enough after that misunderstanding I was never very confused about sex.

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