"Wait, you like a fat chick?"

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MASTACHIEFPWN:
What the fuck? Is there really a problem with what people find attractive? Is there really a problem with finding a girl who isn't completely skinny attractive? Why does society drive us in such stupid ways?

Have you considered it can be due to a difference in communication?

Some people are talking of BMI 18- as being skinny, and BMI 22-24 as fat. Some people talk about BMI 24-30 as 'a big fuller' (while especially the upper cases are heavily overweight) and about morbid obesity as 'fat', to make an extreme example.

It's possible you hold the normal definition, and your friend the one being pushed by the fat acceptance movement. True enough, when any woman describes herself as any euphemism of being fat I expect the worst too. Sometimes obese people call themselves 'a pound more', while in reality they're at least twice their healthy weight and you're talking hundreds and hundreds of pounds more.

I like some meat. If you know what I mean. But not like....fat.
But I am VERY flexible with what kind of women I find attractive. I would like to consider myself undifferentiated, but with slight trends.
I have very little care for what others find attractive, to a very reasonable extent.

You're bullshitting, I don't believe you. People don't just say shit like that.

I'm with a woman who is a bit overweight, but she's very attractive to me, we have a lot in common and we get along great.

I've also been attracted to women who are a lot older than I am, and women who don't exactly have the best reputations.

Don't let someone tell you who you can and can't be attracted to.

This requires some context >_> is the girl smaller than a size 14, because if so I'm reasonably certain the girl isn't even fat. Willing to say your friends being a dick and he needs to apologise, but deal with it like a man and tell him your feels don't just walk away and ignore it.

What your friend said sounds more like a bad joke to me than anything else. If, however, he was being serious, then he's a massive prick with whom there's no point in being friends with.

Azuaron:

Spineyguy:
Also, I wonder if he'd do the same thing if you started dating a really thick girl. Would he say 'Dude, how can you like a stupid chick?' I somewhat doubt that.

I would definitely criticize a friend for dating a stupid person.

You, speaking as an enlightened and intelligent commenter who is capable of thinking beyond the physical attributes of a person. The man in question here clearly does not share your appreciation of a woman's mind.

Ah yes, I remember when I was 13.

snowplow:
Being fat is a health risk. Doesn't matter if you're "comfortable" or a "real woman" or think you're a "healthy size". You risk health problems. So NO DEAR SILLY ESCAPISTS, BEING FAT IS NOT A PERFECTLY FINE THING TO BE.

That said, your friend is a huge douche and you shouldn't be friends with him anymore.

CAPTCHA: against the grain

The opriginal poster pointed out that she is not "fat" but not your regular skinny model type. That is not a health risk (yet). if she becomes a balloon, sure, but modern "thin" life of not eating for a week and such are certainly not any more healthier.

snowplow:

Not according to modern science and medicine.

There's a difference between "can be healthy" and "generally is healthy".
I know overweight people with a lower cholesterol levels and blood pressure than me. The reason being fat can be a problem is that those things are usually, but not always, connected.

And OP, as long as you find her attractive, who the hell cares, besides douchebags? Girlfriends aren't bling-bling that you get simply to brag to your friends about.

snowplow:
Being fat is a health risk. Doesn't matter if you're "comfortable" or a "real woman" or think you're a "healthy size". You risk health problems. So NO DEAR SILLY ESCAPISTS, BEING FAT IS NOT A PERFECTLY FINE THING TO BE.

This may be a fact, but it doesn't, and shouldn't, dictate who you're happy with or who you love.

Lumber Barber:
You're bullshitting, I don't believe you. People don't just say shit like that.

I have to agree. No one's that stupid or insensitive, especially to a friend, for no reason. There has to be more to it than this.

EeveeElectro:
Is your friend in question a sexy, smouldering, Robert Downey Jr (just using a random attractive celeb) look-alike? I'm sure he is. Sounds like he has all the girls after him. Girls just love shallow pricks like that.

You should have just told him to pull his head out of his arse. As long as she's not dangerously unhealthy then I don't see what the problem is.

I am very much a fat girl and have had no problems getting a boyfriend in the past. I can tell you, your friend is going to have a very hard time getting laid unless he bucks his ideas up.

Just saw this, and had to comment. I love your posts! You just sound down to earth and fun.

OT: As a bigger girl (please don't judge me, I'm on medications that cause weight gain, thank you) I'd hate, hate, HATE to meet your "friend". It may come as a surprise to him, but we fat girls have feelings, and often we hate our bodies as much or more than other people do. Finding someone willing to look beyond just our weight is an amazing thing - I found this out when I met my husband.

Whether it works out between you and your girl or not, I commend your attitude!

I think think you've just figured out what your friend has yet to understand. Women in the real world come in all shapes and sizes and very, very few are model perfect and those that are aren't always the most pleasant to be around. And while a model type girl may be nice to look at, a gal with a little more meat on her bones is MUCH more pleasant to feel when you get down to business. You'll see. ;) Good luck dude.

Well, I, Personally, Could no longer date someone who was overweight. I went there once when I was younger (and more desperate) and dated someone who was, without a shadow of a doubt, morbidly obese (Two years ago she had her stomach stapled and she is still in therapy. From what I understand she is a much nicer person these days and has lost a hell of a lot of weight)

Since then, well, I guess I have become sizest.

But on the flip side, over the last few years I dated a string of annorexics. Two full blown dangerously underweight people, one person who used to be much worse but has now got ontop of it. They were all obsessed with food and hypercompetetive about weight. It was highly annoying, especially when I consider my own weight issues (Used to be massively overweight, then I was massively underweight, currently I am bang on the mark with regards to healthyness)

In short? I would never date someone who was dangerously underweight or dangerously overweight ever again. Too skinny = Not for me. Too fat = Not for me. Some people are just like that.

Now, as for judging someone based purely on their weight? That is just not called for. Personally I can find both incredibly skinny and overweight people to be attractive, I am just not interested in them. But judging someone because they are willing to date someone who is larger than the norm? That is just not called for. Overweight people are people too. Whatever floats your boat and whatnot.

It occurs that what I have said will probably irritate people. Since this is the internet, most of what anybody can say will probably irritate people. Heh. Just want to make it clear that I am not "Sizest" in that I cannot find people who others would consider fat attractive. More that due to past experience, someones BMI being between 18.5 and 25 is now a requirement for me to consider them dating material. Oh, and them not having any diagnosed serious mental issues.

Artemis923:
I make fun of my buddies if they pork fat chicks.

So, whatever. If you can't take someone calling your gf fat, find new friends.

Personally, I think you need to stop taking it so personal and grow a pair. If you like your fat chick, tell your buddies to go eat a dick or something.

Captcha: Grain of salt, with which you should take my opinion.

Didn't he? He said he cut ties with the guy, because he was being an asshole.

I think you should drop the dickhead like a disease.

RaphaelsRedemption:

EeveeElectro:
Is your friend in question a sexy, smouldering, Robert Downey Jr (just using a random attractive celeb) look-alike? I'm sure he is. Sounds like he has all the girls after him. Girls just love shallow pricks like that.

You should have just told him to pull his head out of his arse. As long as she's not dangerously unhealthy then I don't see what the problem is.

I am very much a fat girl and have had no problems getting a boyfriend in the past. I can tell you, your friend is going to have a very hard time getting laid unless he bucks his ideas up.

Just saw this, and had to comment. I love your posts! You just sound down to earth and fun.

OT: As a bigger girl (please don't judge me, I'm on medications that cause weight gain, thank you) I'd hate, hate, HATE to meet your "friend". It may come as a surprise to him, but we fat girls have feelings, and often we hate our bodies as much or more than other people do. Finding someone willing to look beyond just our weight is an amazing thing - I found this out when I met my husband.

Whether it works out between you and your girl or not, I commend your attitude!

Heh, thanks! :) Fun I'm not too sure about but I have my moments xD

I totally agree with your point too. Pricks like that do nothing for our already crappy confidence and to be honest, if I saw a guy I was interested in pick on another girls weight, he'd be straight out the door! Shallowness is probably one of the most awful personality traits.

And don't worry - my weight went down then shot up when I started my pill. Trying to get it back down now though. I'm glad you found a man who loves you for who you are, you seem really nice :)

Rather date someone with weight then date anyone who likes MLP.

A person is a person and you find yourself getting along with people of different worldviews, weights, interests, etc. I have so many different people I've befriended and dated because of who they are not how they look. While sexual attraction is important in a relationship (and it means alot more to some people than others) your attraction is yours to have.

Lagao:
Rather date someone with weight then date anyone who likes MLP.

Your avatar is so appropriate.

The Human Torch:

BringBackBuck:

The Human Torch:

Ah yes, Monica Mowi... Om nom nom nom nom.

Here's the problem: the OP hasn't really been clear about how fat she is and that is why there is a polarising range of opinions.

MASTACHIEFPWN:
she has gained a conciderable amount of weight, but she isn't really "Fat".

Some people hear fat and assume "morbidly obese' and immediately go down the social stigmatising, health problems etc route. Other people are hearing fat and thinking Marilyn Monroe size women, she's not fat, actually kind of hot and a curvy and his friend is being a dick.

I mean, I hear you say you're into muscly chicks, I am thinking

and then I googled Monica Mowi...holy shit that is an impressive physique.


That is really at the extreme end of muscular, I would caution a friend of mine about going after a woman like that. You would be signing up to a partner who would probably spend 3-4 hours in the gym everyday, never drink alcohol, i mean that is not just a preference for a girl that delivers a firm handjob that is a serious lifestyle choice.

Nothing against your preferences - whatever floats your boat. I am just illustrating that terms like fat and muscle apply to a wide range of body types and illicit a wide range of opinions depending on where on that scale the person fits.

It doesn't help that the photo you googled of Monica Mowi is an obvious photoshop.
Here is a better one:

She is not that huge as some of the steroid guzzling ones, and yeah, the level of muscularity that a person can desire is completely dependant on their own standards. My girlfriend's physique looks more like the girl in the first picture you linked.

Nephew of mine has a girlfriend that weighs more than 100 kilo's and is only 1,64cm's tall. He loves the very chunky ones. I personally do not like fat girls at all, no matter how lovely and nice they are, if you have too many places to store spare change, you are off my to-do list.

Personally I like all levels of muscles from fit girls to as big as Monica. It's just that as Human Torch knows if I revealed to my friends that I like girls like Monica I know I'd be hated for it. The point here being if you like something that most people don't then many people won't like you because you're being different.

I'm honetsly surprised you didn't kick him in the balls right then and there. If he's openly insulting your girlfriend, fuck him and all the shit heads who agree with him. They are not your friends.

Maybe he said 'phat' as in Pretty Hot And Tempting, 'cause he don't like hot girls.

Are we talking Queen's Fat Bottomed Girls level, AC/DC's Whole Lotta Rosie level, or Old Country Buffet's elephant herd level?

I am far from only liking skinny girls (don't turn them down either) but when someone is overweight it implies lack of self control and in worst case scenarios, health problems.

Also, humans usually mate with people from their own "league". Being with a fat person tells the others you're a poor catch and your genes are not favorable to our species.

Limecake:
and if Cena is cool with it I don't see how your average joe has any right to make fun of someone for it.

Because John Cena is obviously the person every man should follow. Eek.

Lagao:
Rather date someone with weight then date anyone who likes MLP.

I am considering taking everything back and just agree with that.

If you like a girl, no matter what your friends say go after her. I have missed out on some great girls cuz of my "what will others say" voice in my head. Personally for me "No Fat Chicks" reign true in my world. Yea, cuz I think fat is ugly (not gonna apologize for my thoughts) but more so cuz I'm skinny and anyone over weight would squish me flat.

I have no problems with people finding fat people attractive.

Personally, that's not my thing, but that's just me.

Jonluw:
Most people generally don't care who other people find attractive.

However, the norm is that skinny = attractive, and people are generally surprised when one of their friends deviates from the norm.

Your friend goes past that initial surprise and argues that "fat chicks can't have boyfriends". That's just really weird.
I could see myself going "Wait what? How? Why?" if a person I knew exclusively liked obese people, but finding a person who happens to be overweight attractive really isn't weird at all.

Overwieght is odd, but maybe you're overweight isn't borderline obesity. besides that, my rule is that if a person is risking their health with their behavior,then they are unattractive. Overeating is self-destructive behavior, but so is under-eating. Sounded like a PSA, but that's my opinion.

astrav1:
Ah yes, I remember when I was 13.

I'm actually 16... get yo facts streight~

TheScientificIssole:

Jonluw:
Most people generally don't care who other people find attractive.

However, the norm is that skinny = attractive, and people are generally surprised when one of their friends deviates from the norm.

Your friend goes past that initial surprise and argues that "fat chicks can't have boyfriends". That's just really weird.
I could see myself going "Wait what? How? Why?" if a person I knew exclusively liked obese people, but finding a person who happens to be overweight attractive really isn't weird at all.

Overwieght is odd, but maybe you're overweight isn't borderline obesity. besides that, my rule is that if a person is risking their health with their behavior,then they are unattractive. Overeating is self-destructive behavior, but so is under-eating. Sounded like a PSA, but that's my opinion.

To be honest, I have no idea what the technical definitions of 'obese' and 'overweight' respectively are.
I just figured I'd use them as synonyms.

ToffeeMC:

snowplow:
Being fat is a health risk. Doesn't matter if you're "comfortable" or a "real woman" or think you're a "healthy size". You risk health problems. So NO DEAR SILLY ESCAPISTS, BEING FAT IS NOT A PERFECTLY FINE THING TO BE.

This may be a fact, but it doesn't, and shouldn't, dictate who you're happy with or who you love.

Lumber Barber:
You're bullshitting, I don't believe you. People don't just say shit like that.

I have to agree. No one's that stupid or insensitive, especially to a friend, for no reason. There has to be more to it than this.

As for the second part, I need to clarify that he isn't anything like my best friend, and he's always been sort of a dick, though I never expected him to be that much of a dick... then again now that I think about it he only really dates like fucking anorexic girls.

Time to make enemies.

MASTACHIEFPWN:
Uggghhh, sometimes I hate people.
Anyway, I guess the best way to make you understand this situation is to start from the begining- sort of...
Alrighty, so a bit over a year ago I met this amazing girl, I've liked her pretty much sense I met her. So yadda yadda yadda, no point in chasing her, I've got no chance, another year of my life wasted- No big deal.

Yeah, I hate them too. Okay, you spent a year either chasing or wanting for someone's attention and eventually got rejected in whatever way.

the same guy:

So, for these past couple months I've had to deal with huge amounts of depression, a good way to get it off my mind is girls. So, to not be totally consumed by the bleak void in my soul, I've began exploring other options, per say, and someone I am finding increasingly attractive is one of my friends from my freshman year. She was always very nice, very friendly, and just an enjoyable person to be around. I wasn't able to talk to her that much this year, we didn't have any classes together, and rarely saw eachother in the halls. But anyway, for some reason my brain is suddenly deciding to click and tell me she's attractive.

So after the put-down and kick to the self esteem you go over some list of potential replacements and find a suitable one. The way you describe her reads a lot like complacency.

the same guy:

This person truely made me angry with that statement, and I calmly replied "Yeah, is there a problem with that?"
His response "Fuck yeah, fat girls can't have boyfriends, that's just sick"
Resisting the urge to come to his house and punch him in the face, I simply stopped replying to his texts.
I asked some of my other friends about this, and most of them didn't care/mind the fact, but there were a select few who took the same attidude as him.
...
What the fuck? Is there really a problem with what people find attractive? Is there really a problem with finding a girl who isn't completely skinny attractive? Why does society drive us in such stupid ways?

...No. Guess there is, you asked them, they did not fathom the appeal and made that clear, making you no better. Skinny is attractive? Take some psychology classes or read a book about it, makes you appreciate human even less.

Get rid of him.

Xan Krieger:
Personally I like all levels of muscles from fit girls to as big as Monica. It's just that as Human Torch knows if I revealed to my friends that I like girls like Monica I know I'd be hated for it. The point here being if you like something that most people don't then many people won't like you because you're being different.

This is indeed true, for some reason liking fit girls gets you as much ire as liking fat girls. Even though the most common excuse for disliking fat girls is: 'she is unhealthy'. These muscle girls tend to be very, very healthy (not counting the ones that are using illegal steroids) and have a better lifestyle than other people. So, I just don't get it.

Ah well, I am going just going to give you a *bro fist* and commend you on your fine taste in women. :D

And OT: Date whatever you want, fat, skinny, muscled, regular. If it's what turns you on, then go for it.

MASTACHIEFPWN:

astrav1:
Ah yes, I remember when I was 13.

I'm actually 16... get yo facts streight~

I might tell astrav1 that I remember when I was 26 ;)

One of the weird things about gamer culture is the huge age range it includes. Heck, my dad is pushing 70, and he played Skyrim.

To be a bit more on topic; I married an above average weight woman and we just past our ten year anniversary :)

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