Where would you build your evil fortress? Pages 1 2 3 4 NEXT | |
Aperture Innovators Motif, cannibalistic marshmallows (Exactly how it sounds) as henchmen in present day (of course). all in the process of bringing socialism to armadillos. Makes sense? no. but my dream, it is. ~Theplagued | |
pfff...(!) Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to 'conquering the world... middle-England style!' Do you intend to rule the world by screwing with Tesco's quality-control, or what?! XD OT: I 'unno, Capitol Hill? | |
Deep underground, Strategically underneath a children's hospital and a day care center where I will offer FREE care to ensure the beds are FULL! Human shields are good, shields that are children are even BETTER to discourage any "Let's bomb him" plots. Entertainment for these children and their parents will also subliminally turn them into VERY loyal subjects / future henchmen...a disposable army needs fresh blood. | |
Well, if you're going to be that generous about possible locations. I'll take a pocket dimension of my own, present day time period. Access points between the PD and "normal" space can be opened or closed at any location, but only from within the PD. I would also be the only one to use it as a residence/working area. Any non-undercover minions would simply be placed in one of several satellite bases, usually underground with a single very well hidden and fortified standard exit. Far less opportunity for incompetence or betrayal to bring me down that way. In the meantime if a satellite location is compromised, I can use the PD transport system to relocate all personnel and valuable equipment to another base within minutes. My goal would be domination principally by social and economic pressure, initially brought to bear using informational warfare. Screw death threats using moon lasers and nuclear space missiles. As cool as they are, they destroy everything you might otherwise rule. | |
I'd pick a nice skyscraper in a major metropolitan area maybe have a school on one of the lower levels. That way 'blowing up his lair' never becomes an option for the would be heroes. Also my deadliest trap would be a chute that drops the do-gooders out into skid row with a sign glued to their skin that says 'i will give you drugs for sexual favors' and let hepatitis and tuberculous do the rest. Sure it might not kill him or it could take a while, but it's just legally grey enough I can't be touched. | |
My would be hidden in plain site like a factories estate on the outside but evil lair on the inside. | |
It would be in the Steam Railway Museum, and I would get some trains up and running and send them zipping around the countryside spraying Agent Orange out of all the windows. The best part is that no-one would suspect a thing 'cause it's just Swindon. | |
In the air, I think. | |
?!?! You... sneaky bastard, you! I personally would've gone for Norwich! | |
No Mr. Boy, I expect you to buy. Sorry, couldn't miss an opening like that. Personally, I'd build it inside my Fortress of Good. Since apparently I'm rich/powerful enough to consider global domination, I'd set up a charity and buy PR agents until everyone thought I was a brilliant guy. Then, if I put my Global Domination HeadQuarters inside the charity HQ, no-one can attack it without killing civilians (not ordinary civilians, but charity workers to boot) and seeming like a dick. Edit: curses, the ninjas have foiled my cunning plan! | |
I actually live in Norwich, and you're right, the only evil thing to come out of that place is a moderate amount of racism and homophobia - and since I'm not a racially or sexually motivated villain no one would suspect a thing! | |
"The cheat commandos will never find my secret desert hideout now that we've located to my nana's back yard!" | |
The HQ of a Global Corporation.. thats how they do it currently dont they? | |
In the minds of my enemies | |
EA Corporate Offices. | |
/thread OT: I would put my secret base under the pool in front of The Lincoln memorial. It's already under construction so they wouldn't notice me building much, and when they do there is waaaay to much foot traffic to take action. | |
Center of the Earth, buh. Keeps me warm on those chilly nights. | |
Wait, you mean you aren't an evil would-be conqueror of the world, and you don't have a secret evil base of operations hidden in the deserts of Nevada, that the government covers up for you with all of those silly reports about Area 51? Oh, I fear I've said too much... | |
I'll build an old-school evil castle . . . IN SPACE! I will then proceed to drop it from orbit on to the world's most densely populated orphanage . . . for bunnies. | |
You can never go wrong with a space age Pacific volcano lair. Maybe a moon colony too when I'm bored. | |
In the heart of the Supermassive black hole at the center of the galaxy, made of a special material that would prevent it from being crushed down into its great dark, unyielding maw. I would then build up the New Grox Empire near the galactic core, with the eventual target of my great plan being the Earth. Then I would invade with my mighty armada, and bring my genius plan to fruition. The theft of all of the sodium chloride on and in the Earth. | |
I'd make mine a lovely little cottage... And My guards would be adorable little Corgis... And My Great Plan would be to systematically destroy each and every copy of Pride and Prejudice in the world! Why? Because I can. | |
A super-advanced sci-fi skyship. In 12th Century England. Become my minions! | |
That is the first place everyone would go to look! D: Nobody would expect Valve's Corporate Offices. >:) | |
Mordor. At least there the hero won't be able to simply walk in. | |
If I were to play it smart, a massive submarine pen built into a glacier would seem like a good idea. Find a big enough one to work with, and you can house large stockpiles of resources and doomsday devices, a fleet of submarines and have a small 'fleet' of roaming glaciers armed with early detection and elimination systems. I don't know many navy policies involving searching through iceberg herds and ice sheets for ghost fleets, but with a giant haystack to hide in, it seems like a good idea. | |
I'd create my evil fortress in the past, and then keep the past hostage. If anyone tried to stop me I'd yell "come any closer and I kill this butterfly, and then you have no idea how the future will change!" It's a foolproof plan. | |
Greenland. For one thing, it's very, very flat. And another, I need some way to cool the electromagnetic accelerators which provide anti-air and armor fire support. Gotta keep the goody two shoes at bay. | |
I would build my Fortress next to someone elses Fortress so when people come to stop me I can be like "Aw no way man? You thought that was me? It was the guy across the street." | |
Operating under video game logic: It's a common assumption in game development that no one EVER looks up, so an airship would work. | |
But - But - Pride and Prejudice is the only romance novel I like! D: My Great Plan is now officially to feed all the world's corgis to the world's Pomeranians. | |
Well not that I've thought about it before or anything... It depends entirely on the type of evil would-be conqueror, am I an evil genius? A lich? A robot AI? If I was an evil genius, or just regular ole' plain intelligent me, I'd build it either on a private island straight out of James Bond or a "THAT'S NO MOON" style giant space station. On the private island I'd have a nice above ground mansion, patrolled daily by armed guards, complete with dock, storage wearhouses, and a landing strip. Beneath the ground, and in the side of that volcano you just know I'd need, I'd have an underground base, white hallways, patrolled by men in nazi-esque white outfits and women in skimpy ninja suits. I would have a large long table with a giant monitor with a map of the world on the wall on one side, a giant monitor with my evil logo behind me, and a giant monitor with tons of moving text and numbers on the other side. Each chair on this table sans mine would fold back into the boiling hot MAGGGGGMUH beneath us. This would be activated by both a voice trigger[1] and a thumb print reader, which requires a pulse of course. The volcano would be hollowed out on the inside with a nuclear missile silo sitting where the inside of the volcano once was. There would be a small cave on the opposite side of the volcano down low, this would be my escape route but it would also serve as a great entrance to my secret base for the heroes to sneak in and kill me. Inside the space station would be levels and levels of parading soldiers, again dressed like white nazis. (Remember I'm an EVIL mastermind) There would be hangers and hangers of spaceships, we would primarily be a pirate haven. Protecting the seedy underbelly of the galaxy and taking a massive cut off the top of course. If I was a lich, or had access to evil magic I would live a dark castle deep in the mountains. A massive graveyard of my enemies surrounding my lands, each grave a bed for my trusty undead army ready to rise at a moments notice. This gives a perfect defense as any living being not warded by myself who takes a step near a grave causes three hundred skeletal soldiers wake up killing the intruder. The castle would have three or four floating towers connected to the main keep by magical ropes, each one an escape pod if I ever personally come into any danger. I would have some magical portal to my otherworldly allies which would of course be where the heroes get into my castle. But, luckily, I would never physically leave my main tower which could detach and escape at any time. I would work almost entirely through puppets, the reanimated remains of my former neighbors. [1] Me saying "Amazing work Mr.[insert henchman name]" | |
I would put all my dumbest henchmen in the fake base inside an active volcano. Have those henchmen be incompetent and easily discovered in order to lure the guy who always got the ability to take down all of them to the wrong place. Then place my real base inside a bakery, because you know... free cupcakes. | |
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You are now an evil would-be conqueror of the world. Where is your evil base of operations?
You can go with any time period, universe, or place you choose.
Present day? Or maybe the far future? Or past? Perhaps a nice, cozy spot on the moon? Or deep space? Or parallel dimension? How about something a bit more underground?
Me? I'm going with a James Bond-style volcano-doom fortress. Complete with henchmen in silver space suits, scantily-clad female ninja assassins, and my own personal formula for the worldwide destruction of corn.
And you?