The Dapper Gentlemen's League of Top Hatted Villainy. Now Recruiting!

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Who are we, what are we? Look at the door, now back at the computer, now back at the door, now back at the computer. Now click on the spoiler box!

Did you wait until I told you to click on the spoiler box? If you did, then goooooood, if not, then I ask that you kindly leave the room now sir.

Have you ever wondered why the Captchas seemed to have gained sentience?

Have you pondered why it seems every country on the planet has a pretentious Latin Motto?

Did it seem... Strange? When all mentions of Half-Life 3 just "disappeared"?

The Knights Templar, Freemasons, Illuminati, those were mere sects, branches that people have hunted down in a sort of superstitious fear of the unknown... All the while they have missed the terrible truth!

'Twas us all along! From the dawn of time, we have lived in the shadows! We are the Dapper Gentlemen's League of Top Hatted Villainy!

We are the well groomed, well mannered, well mustachioed men who shall defeat the Brovengers AND the Injustice League! We shall conquer Escapistia!

Now you may have a few questions, FEAR NOT! For I shall answer them all!

And who can forget our league's beloved founder?

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Truly an influence to us all!

So don't delay! Join the League today!

Captcha: Writing Desk

HAHA! THE SENTIENCE PROGRAM WORKS! IT KNOWS WHAT I'M WRITING ON!

DAM YOU THE INJUSTICE LEAGUE WILL NOT STAND FOR THIS!

We of the LoLengers League will defeat this new enemy.
Wait, wasn't this all allocated to forum games anyway?

Im already a part of EVIL
image
....its okay.

Greetings, I am EclpseDragon
I have a business proposition for you.
I own a small island populated by mad scientist and all female dinosaurs.

If you don't believe I hired two such evil scientist on this thread right here.
http://www.escapistmagazine.com/forums/read/18.378382-The-most-frivolous-thing-you-can-do-with-100-billion?page=1

Or if you don't want to look through those pages here's the entire conversation for you in this convenient spoiler box.

I could make all those wonderful dinosaurs wear top hats, all for a measly 90,000,000 payments of just $19.99!

Wait that's not all to sweeten the deal, I will also throw in half a dozen of these creatures whatever they are... our scientist made them by accident and they're taking up room in our warehouse.

No. Really. They just keep messing things up... but they're great to hide in your enemies socks.

This is a faux League, filled with poorly moustachioed fellows! I'd warn you not to cross the true League!

And if you must continue, then you shall end up working the mines like all our orphans!

(Also, this should probably be moved to Forum games. If the mods would be so kind.)

image

It has been too long since gamers have had a voice in this world. We need to be the heroes they deserve, but not that they need.

Or possibly the other way round.

I shall join if it pleases you. Also, I totally have all those things you told me to have.

Also, you don't think I am worthy of joining? Just look at my avatar, and my Username. See my username? See it's sleek, grammatically correct, concise form? Totally devoid of messy symbols or numerics? Gaze upon it's thematic cohesion with my avatar and despair! See how the avatar rests on a plain background, a symbol of the theater, in cool greys? Notice that it is a pop culture reference obscure enough so as not to cheapen the effect, but not so far gone that it encroaches upon the realm of Hipsterism?

Look upon my dedication to dapperitude, ye mighty and despair! For I am the Thespian!

Also, everybody knows that villains must have themes. Mine is clearly the Theater. I DEMAND A SEAT IN YOUR SOCIETY if you don't mind please.

SO SAYS THE THESPIAN

What the fantastical flying ferret fuck is going on in this thread?!

We can not stand for this!

Brovengers!

Brossemble!

image

Thespian:
I shall join if it pleases you. Also, I totally have all those things you told me to have.

Also, you don't think I am worthy of joining? Just look at my avatar, and my Username. See my username? See it's sleek, grammatically correct, concise form? Totally devoid of messy symbols or numerics? Gaze upon it's thematic cohesion with my avatar and despair! See how the avatar rests on a plain background, a symbol of the theater, in cool greys? Notice that it is a pop culture reference obscure enough so as not to cheapen the effect, but not so far gone that it encroaches upon the realm of Hipsterism?

Look upon my dedication to dapperitude, ye mighty and despair! For I am the Thespian!

Also, everybody knows that villains must have themes. Mine is clearly the Theater. I DEMAND A SEAT IN YOUR SOCIETY if you don't mind please.

SO SAYS THE THESPIAN

YOU ARE TRULY A DAPPER GENTLEMAN!

The society is growing, soon all of Escapistia shall be ours! And then all must wear top hats and mustaches (if they are worthy) while singing "Rule Britannia!"

Imthatguy:
DAM YOU THE INJUSTICE LEAGUE WILL NOT STAND FOR THIS!

For once IL and the Brovengers stand in agreement. We started this badass team founding, and now every guy and his dog is lining up to create some kind of hero/villain/commando team. It's just getting rather irritating.

Daystar Clarion:
What the fantastical flying ferret fuck is going on in this thread?!

We can not stand for this!

Brovengers!

Brossemble!

image

Broland the Gunslinger, reporting in, sai. These half-arsed leaguers will scatter 'fore the wind, do ya ken?

What in the name of malarkey is THIS.

See the mustache and top hat?

Yeah,that goes with the taco!

And the taco leads a League of Injustice!

Daystar Clarion:
What the fantastical flying ferret fuck is going on in this thread?!

We can not stand for this!

Brovengers!

Brossemble!

image

This is what I think of The Dapper Gentlemen's League of Top Hatted Villainy!

image

Puny League!

Binnsyboy:

Imthatguy:
DAM YOU THE INJUSTICE LEAGUE WILL NOT STAND FOR THIS!

For once IL and the Brovengers stand in agreement. We started this badass team founding, and now every guy and his dog is lining up to create some kind of hero/villain/commando team. It's just getting rather irritating.

Yeah, thanks for inventing the concept of forum clans :O Sorry you have to share your toys with the other kids.

ANIMOSITY

(Seriously though this post is in jest D:)

Thespian:

Binnsyboy:

Imthatguy:
DAM YOU THE INJUSTICE LEAGUE WILL NOT STAND FOR THIS!

For once IL and the Brovengers stand in agreement. We started this badass team founding, and now every guy and his dog is lining up to create some kind of hero/villain/commando team. It's just getting rather irritating.

Yeah, thanks for inventing the concept of forum clans :O Sorry you have to share your toys with the other kids.

ANIMOSITY

(Seriously though this post is in jest D:)

Under rule 98, subsection C of the "forum hero team" rule book, I think you'll find I'm legally required to react with hostility to new guys encroaching on our turf, so to speak.

My hands are tied, you understand.

The Brovengers will not sit idly by whilst you make a mockery of the once-proud mustache! Mustaches were meant for honor! For wiggling! For twirling! For officers in Britain!

You vile corruptors! You use the mustache's power for villainy! SHAME. FOR SHAME.

Binnsyboy:
Under rule 98, subsection C of the "forum hero team" rule book, I think you'll find I'm legally required to react with hostility to new guys encroaching on our turf, so to speak.

My hands are tied, you understand.

Well I'm embarassed, I seem to have neglected subsection C. It's always the subsections that get me. Carry on, good sir.

Carbonyl:
The Brovengers will not sit idly by whilst you make a mockery of the once-proud mustache! Mustaches were meant for honor! For wiggling! For twirling! For officers in Britain!

You vile corruptors! You use the mustache's power for villainy! SHAME. FOR SHAME.

Oh? You seem so sure of yourself. And yet, I notice you spelled 'Moustache' without the 'o'. You spelled it the AMERICAN WAY you CHURLISH LOUT! YOU, SIR are the corruptor! YOU mock the proud Moustache! SHAME ON YOU, SIR!

Daystar Clarion:
What the fantastical flying ferret fuck is going on in this thread?!

We can not stand for this!

Brovengers!

Brossemble!

image

BrOwl reporting for duty! And I am bringing my new battle suit!

image

Carbonyl:
The Brovengers will not sit idly by whilst you make a mockery of the once-proud mustache! Mustaches were meant for honor! For wiggling! For twirling! For officers in Britain!

You vile corruptors! You use the mustache's power for villainy! SHAME. FOR SHAME.


YOU JEST MY GOOD MAN FOR THE MIGHT MUSTACHE CAN ONLY BE USED FOR EVIL!

Thespian:

Binnsyboy:
Under rule 98, subsection C of the "forum hero team" rule book, I think you'll find I'm legally required to react with hostility to new guys encroaching on our turf, so to speak.

My hands are tied, you understand.

Well I'm embarassed, I seem to have neglected subsection C. It's always the subsections that get me. Carry on, good sir.

Carbonyl:
The Brovengers will not sit idly by whilst you make a mockery of the once-proud mustache! Mustaches were meant for honor! For wiggling! For twirling! For officers in Britain!

You vile corruptors! You use the mustache's power for villainy! SHAME. FOR SHAME.

Oh? You seem so sure of yourself. And yet, I notice you spelled 'Moustache' without the 'o'. You spelled it the AMERICAN WAY you CHURLISH LOUT! YOU, SIR are the corruptor! YOU mock the proud Moustache! SHAME ON YOU, SIR!

Americans have had some INCREDIBLE mustaches! Mustaches can be appreciated by all nations. You do not have the right to lay claim to such a majestic creature, and you don't get to taint the world's innocent love of mustaches!

And Sir, I am a Lady!

You can all take your organizations and shove them up yer asses, aint nothing out here that can stop an angry Welshman, bach!!

Imthatguy:

Carbonyl:
The Brovengers will not sit idly by whilst you make a mockery of the once-proud mustache! Mustaches were meant for honor! For wiggling! For twirling! For officers in Britain!

You vile corruptors! You use the mustache's power for villainy! SHAME. FOR SHAME.


YOU JEST MY GOOD MAN FOR THE MIGHT MUSTACHE CAN ONLY BE USED FOR EVIL!

Teddy Roosevelt! Nikola Tesla!
HA!

Carbonyl:

Americans have had some INCREDIBLE mustaches! Mustaches can be appreciated by all nations. You do not have the right to lay claim to such a majestic creature, and you don't get to taint the world's innocent love of mustaches!

And Sir, I am a Lady!

A woman? On the internet. What sorcery is this? Besides, woman or man, all are tied under the all-unifying honorific of 'sir', Sir!

But you spoke on behalf of British Officers! I put it to you that you know nothing of the brits! Neither do I in particular as I am Irish, but I have the sense to know that if one chooses to revere the British and their use of moustaches so, one might do well to learn their tongue before criticizing how others use their image!

(holy crap I confused myself there O.o)

Carbonyl:

Imthatguy:

Carbonyl:
The Brovengers will not sit idly by whilst you make a mockery of the once-proud mustache! Mustaches were meant for honor! For wiggling! For twirling! For officers in Britain!

You vile corruptors! You use the mustache's power for villainy! SHAME. FOR SHAME.


YOU JEST MY GOOD MAN FOR THE MIGHT MUSTACHE CAN ONLY BE USED FOR EVIL!

Teddy Roosevelt! Nikola Tesla!
HA!

HITLER, STALIN!

Tesla was evil too in ways you can never begin to understand.

Imthatguy:

Carbonyl:

Imthatguy:


YOU JEST MY GOOD MAN FOR THE MIGHT MUSTACHE CAN ONLY BE USED FOR EVIL!

Teddy Roosevelt! Nikola Tesla!
HA!

HITLER, STALIN!

Tesla was evil too in ways you can never begin to understand.

Godwin's Law has been invoked.

image

Daystar Clarion:
]Godwin's Law has been invoked.

image

Please that mustache type is forever off-limits due to him

Thespian:

Carbonyl:

Americans have had some INCREDIBLE mustaches! Mustaches can be appreciated by all nations. You do not have the right to lay claim to such a majestic creature, and you don't get to taint the world's innocent love of mustaches!

And Sir, I am a Lady!

A woman? On the internet. What sorcery is this? Besides, woman or man, all are tied under the all-unifying honorific of 'sir', Sir!

But you spoke on behalf of British Officers! I put it to you that you know nothing of the brits! Neither do I in particular as I am Irish, but I have the sense to know that if one chooses to revere the British and their use of moustaches so, one might do well to learn their tongue before criticizing how others use their image!

(holy crap I confused myself there O.o)

I am a magical, mystical creature, truly. And EVERYONE knows the British officers have mustaches! Even small children know that!

Imthatguy:

Carbonyl:

Imthatguy:


YOU JEST MY GOOD MAN FOR THE MIGHT MUSTACHE CAN ONLY BE USED FOR EVIL!

Teddy Roosevelt! Nikola Tesla!
HA!

HITLER, STALIN!

Tesla was evil too in ways you can never begin to understand.

Mustaches are a power that is free and untamed, wielded by good or evil, but you cannot claim it solely for one side! To do so is absurd!
AND BEING ABSURD IS MY JOB. YOU CAN'T HAVE IT.

Imthatguy:

Daystar Clarion:
]Godwin's Law has been invoked.

image

Please that mustache type is forever off-limits due to him

Which is a shame, I remember back when it wasn't called "the hitler". Truly a crime against humanity. Oh and all the genocide or whatever...

Also Godwin's law is flawed because it merely suggests that all analogies relating to Hitler are more likely to be flawed, not are inherently flawed. Of course because the analogy it was countering was incorrect in the first place it's kind of moot.

Carbonyl:
I am a magical, mystical creature, truly. And EVERYONE knows the British officers have mustaches! Even small children know that!

Of course. My point was, if you truly respected them, you'd spell it 'moustaches'. They fought and died spelling it 'moustaches', and not for some She-Yankee to come along and (proverbially) spit on their (proverbial) graves with americanised spelling! Curse you! The D.G.L.O.T.H.V shall seek vengeance!

I'm writing this in our ledger. Seriously. I'll do it, I'm crazy.

Carbonyl:

Imthatguy:

Carbonyl:

Teddy Roosevelt! Nikola Tesla!
HA!

HITLER, STALIN!

Tesla was evil too in ways you can never begin to understand.

Mustaches are a power that is free and untamed, wielded by good or evil, but you cannot claim it solely for one side! To do so is absurd!
AND BEING ABSURD IS MY JOB. YOU CAN'T HAVE IT.

Kinda like the Force, only much more powerful :D

Thespian:

Carbonyl:
I am a magical, mystical creature, truly. And EVERYONE knows the British officers have mustaches! Even small children know that!

Of course. My point was, if you truly respected them, you'd spell it 'moustaches'. They fought and died spelling it 'moustaches', and not for some She-Yankee to come along and (proverbially) spit on their (proverbial) graves with americanised spelling! Curse you! The D.G.L.O.T.H.V shall seek vengeance!

I'm writing this in our ledger. Seriously. I'll do it, I'm crazy.

I think you need a better name. That initialism must be a real pain in the ass to say :P

Thespian:

Carbonyl:
I am a magical, mystical creature, truly. And EVERYONE knows the British officers have mustaches! Even small children know that!

Of course. My point was, if you truly respected them, you'd spell it 'moustaches'. They fought and died spelling it 'moustaches', and not for some She-Yankee to come along and (proverbially) spit on their (proverbial) graves with americanised spelling! Curse you! The D.G.L.O.T.H.V shall seek vengeance!

I'm writing this in our ledger. Seriously. I'll do it, I'm crazy.

My computer yells at me when I spell it with an o! I CAN'T BEAR THE LITTLE RED LINE. I CAN'T. Now I'm just spelling it without an o out of spite! I am very spiteful.

You can write in your ledger all you want, but no amount of o's will break me down!

Hazy992:

Carbonyl:

Imthatguy:

HITLER, STALIN!

Tesla was evil too in ways you can never begin to understand.

Mustaches are a power that is free and untamed, wielded by good or evil, but you cannot claim it solely for one side! To do so is absurd!
AND BEING ABSURD IS MY JOB. YOU CAN'T HAVE IT.

Kinda like the Force, only much more powerful :D

Also with way more colors and giraffes!

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