So, my family is homophobic.

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Shocksplicer:

Boudica:

Candidus:
I don't understand why you feel the need to tip-toe. If people like that disown you, what have you lost? Only the stigma of being associated with some very horrible people.

If you need them to live that's one thing, go ahead and eat their food and take their money until you don't need them any more. Using bad people to get by is fine. But tolerating and voluntarily remaining close to bad people, who make society worse by acting with discrimination informed by homophobic prejudices?

I'd discard my family for that and piss all over the ashes of those bridges, because my sense of duty and justice is stronger than any love I've ever felt, and my hatred of those who act contrary to the spirit of either is stronger still, no matter what their relation to me.

The more we shun and alienate people whose beliefs are disgusting, the more we isolate their cancer from the public space. As soon as you can put your family behind you, I recommend you do so.

As for challenging their beliefs, if you're determined to try... You obviously understand how fundamental the problem is - views aside, they don't seem too bright (as in poor education), they can't see for themselves the fallaciousness of a slip-slope argument, and I'd wager that although they speak hatefully about homosexuals, they probably *like* and take joy from the judgement they're passing and the sneering they get to do...

I don't think there's anything you can do but keep living differently in THEIR space. Accept homosexuals the way any civilised person accepts basically anyone. Buy a DVD by a homosexual comedian. If you have them among your friends, don't expose them to the beratement of your family, but keep seeing them and don't neglect to mention them when recounting your evenings because you're afraid of a confrontation. Etc etc. Just live like you should, and hide nothing. Be stubborn and brave. They'll either lash out or adjust.

The problem isn't hatred towards the group you support. The problem is hatred. You can't condemn a group for condemning another group, basically.

"I hate you because you hate them."

You don't combat differing opinions with disdain and anger, else you're as bad as them. You share your opinion and attempt to change their mind. If it fails, you move on. The only time you intervene and cease their rights is when they harm people. Simply being homophobic isn't harming homosexuals. If they were to, say, preach on the street corner that gay people are animals that need to be eradicated, then they can be stopped, as they are creating a dangerous environment.

Simply: don't become the thing you dislike. Be a force of love, not hate, and that's the best you can do.

While I agree that the diplomacy option is the better option is the best path, I just want to say that I have always hated the "If you hate the haters you're as bad as them."
Because you're not as bad as them. They're hating and discriminating against a group of people for no good reason. You're hating against them because they hate others for no good reason. It's a small difference, but crucial.

The don't hate the haters notion, is designed to end hatred. If you hate one group because they hate another group, you're effectively saying they are wrong and you are right, so your hate is 'correct'--the exact thing homophobes do. Bear in mind, I'm talking about opinion and not action here; so disliking someone for actually hurting someone is another issue. I'm just on about opinions.

Really, just don't hate people. You can dislike their beliefs and find their actions appalling, but hate doesn't help anyone, it just leads to more anger and more negativity.

Boudica:

Shocksplicer:

Boudica:
The problem isn't hatred towards the group you support. The problem is hatred. You can't condemn a group for condemning another group, basically.

"I hate you because you hate them."

You don't combat differing opinions with disdain and anger, else you're as bad as them. You share your opinion and attempt to change their mind. If it fails, you move on. The only time you intervene and cease their rights is when they harm people. Simply being homophobic isn't harming homosexuals. If they were to, say, preach on the street corner that gay people are animals that need to be eradicated, then they can be stopped, as they are creating a dangerous environment.

Simply: don't become the thing you dislike. Be a force of love, not hate, and that's the best you can do.

While I agree that the diplomacy option is the better option is the best path, I just want to say that I have always hated the "If you hate the haters you're as bad as them."
Because you're not as bad as them. They're hating and discriminating against a group of people for no good reason. You're hating against them because they hate others for no good reason. It's a small difference, but crucial.

The don't hate the haters notion, is designed to end hatred. If you hate one group because they hate another group, you're effectively saying they are wrong and you are right, so your hate is 'correct'--the exact thing homophobes do. Bear in mind, I'm talking about opinion and not action here; so disliking someone for actually hurting someone is another issue. I'm just on about opinions.

Really, just don't hate people. You can dislike their beliefs and find their actions appalling, but hate doesn't help anyone, it just leads to more anger and more negativity.

I agree that hatred is a bad thing. I just think that the "You're as bad as them" concept is infuriating and stupid.

Eh, my family is horribly racist, sexist and homophobic. I've agreed to disagree with them on alot of points, so long as they at least show respect for other people values. I'm still trying to convince my mother to stop being so disrespectfull of lesbians.

Dangit2019:
First off, I would like to say that I WOULD post this in R&P, but the last time I went in there, everybody started telling me that their opinions were right and every single one of my opinions were wrong, so I generally want to stay far away from those woods as possible.

Now, if you've read a few of my posts, you probably know that I live in Texas because I just keep mentioning it for some reason. Texas is part of Southern America, and tends to retain most of the hyper conservatism that has been associated with the area. My family, sadly, is no different.

Now, I consider my self a bit on the fence (Oh God I hate that figure of speech) when it comes to politics, and I generally regard topics like homosexuality to be of neutral importance to me as I haven't been able to fully pick a side yet. My family, however, is homophobic to a point where I couldn't even have reasonable discussion with them on the topic because "OMG THEY HAVE SEX IN THE BUTT". They believe in the Slippery Slope argument (if we let them marry, what's stopping pedophiles marrying kids derp da herp) and regard any gay couple sexual demons even if they don't believe in sodomy in the first place.

They've gone to lengths to let me know that if I ever came out of the closet, they would absolutely disown me, and it makes me feel bad that they would say something like that so easily and still come back to assure me that they love me completely.

Now, usually this would only be a mild disturbance, but I feel that whenever I dispute their logical fallacies or stick up for good people who happen to be gay that they will feel that I have betrayed them by sticking up for the LIBERALS (DUN DUN DUUUUUUUUUUN) or they will feel that I am becoming gay myself.

How could I be able to dispute their random acts of stupidity (they're generally smart people) without getting casted away because I've been "brainwashed" by the "liberal (ahem, DUN DUN DUUUUUUUUUUUN) media"?

Also, I should mention that my dad was one of the people who took the "Bush head" thing on Game of Thrones seriously just to give you an idea of how much B.S. they will believe.

Dude, they're your family. Families tend to be crazy one way or the other. My mother and I raise our voices at each other constantly because we're so radically different in the way we think, but I still love her and wish I did more to make our relationship better. But in the end there's not really much to do but just accept the way they are. Even if they possibly wouldn't accept you the way you were if you were gay. But well, you're not right, so thank your lucky star and focus on the positives.

Keoul:
Hmmm that's a tricky one...
You could educate them about what you know about homosexuals, that would probably help a lot since fear is born from the unknown, tell them how they're not a different race, it's just sexual preference, they don't spread aids any more than a normal human, and that they were born this way due to an imbalance (or balance rather, a little fuzzy on this part) of hormones.
Give them reasonable arguments so they can understand your point of view.
If all else fails..

Yeah, this wont work. The kind of people to say that if we accept homosexuals we will come to accept pedophiles are so far gone you're better off just ignoring them. Never try to start a discussion about homosexuals and if one of them start one do not get involved. Nothing good will come out of this.

My uncle on my father's side kicked his first-born daughter out of the house when she came out and as far as I know has kept his distance from her since then. I don't know how old she was when she came out (my guess is 18 or 19) but she's 27 now and, married to an awesome person. It's too bad my uncle is missing out on it but hey, his loss. Aside from that, my Dad's side of the family has always shown signs of bigotry to a degree (like my dad's liberal use of the N-bomb) whereas my mother's side has been more liberal (dun-dun-DUUUUUUUUUUHN) with the exception of my mom herself who is actually quite conservative...up until that point of sexual preference (my mom, cousin and, cousin's wife got along really well the few times they've met as an example).

My Dad's side has been distancing themselves from me which is fine. I never knew my Dad's Dad and it looks like if I ever adopt a kid s/he won't know mine. As for my Dad himself, I really wouldn't care if I didn't see him again. I miss him when he's not around but every time I'm out with him he does or says something that just pisses me off and makes me embarrassed to have come from him.

I fully support equal marriage rights and know that its only a matter of time before same-sex marriage is a wide-spread thing. Personally, (beware possible TMI territory but I've talked about this before probably) I am pretty disgusted by sex and sex organs (although that salamander which was discovered in Brazil has sparked that phallic appreciation most little boys go through). I guess that would make me an asexual (mostly: please don't look too closely at the fact that I'm still flirtatious and have a serious girlfriend). This post is long enough now so I'll just go away and be unhelpful elsewhere...stay strong though OP. Final note OP: I love your avatar and totally get the reference!

The biggest issue I see, and one that, if resolved, could probably help a lot with the homophobia, is the fallacy that there is only Republican and Democrat.

Libertarianism is fucking awesome, and from a legal standpoint does not discriminate against homosexuality. Get your parents to recognize that not being Republican does not, in any sense, make you a liberal. This alone should, hopefully, make them realize that all choices are not binary.

Dangit2019:
*snip*
They've gone to lengths to let me know that if I ever came out of the closet, they would absolutely disown me, and it makes me feel bad that they would say something like that so easily and still come back to assure me that they love me completely.
*snip*

Maybe you should absolutely disown them first preferably with a .45 caliber for being fucking ignorant/intolerant arsehats.

Well half jokes aside.
If you want my advice as soon as you can you should cut ties with them, more to a different state or even country and maybe change your name as well. That's what I'd do if I were you, that or the first idea.

Korolev:
FALCON SNIP

Yeah, I used to be like that too. I never really gave it any thought in elementary, because you don't see a lot of gay 4-year-olds in Texas. But as I grew up and found gay people who were awesome (you're thinking Alan Turing, I'm thinking him along with Neil Patrick Harris), it became clear to me that I couldn't label it as a be-all-end-all magic sin that makes people bad. That thinking melts away in high school because you start realizing that few people in the world are "bad guys" and "good guys". I have friends from different races and religions and no one seems to care, but if I were to bring home some girl/friend who acted completely normal, but preferred the ladies instead, suddenly everyone acts as if I brought a dog rapist inside and he was already eyeing my golden retriever. It's just completely a double standard.

ALSO TO EVERYONE IN THE THREAD:

No, I don't want to rush the moving out process or make a run for Canada because while this topic is a bit upsetting to me, they usually don't act like idiots and this is just a very disturbing exception that I needed to get out of my system. I should mention that at least they're not racist too, or we would have an even bigger problem.

joshthor:

I have an uncle who legitimately thinks communism was (literally) created by the devil, and that the jews invent EVERYTHING (i tried explaining to him that while they certainly do invent some things the western world and japan/china invents most things - he did not agree - they are all thieves) and that soon they will make you put a barcode on your forhead in place of a credit card and if you take it your going to hell. arguing with him will do nothing. you can have the most well reasoned argument in the world and his response is "read the bible" regardless of weather you have a bible in front of him. he is still family though - i have to see him 2 times a year and its much more pleasant if you just talk about sports and cars.

Oh, those crazy Jews. Just by curiosity, what would be the endgame of them inventing everything? That seems very helpful to the non-Jewish people (in this hypothetical situation in which he's right for once). Also, wasn't the barcode thing in a Iron Maiden song?

Dangit2019:
My family, however, is homophobic to a point where I couldn't even have reasonable discussion with them on the topic because "OMG THEY HAVE SEX IN THE BUTT".

That they do. So do heterosexual couples.

I have a girlfriend and we do that, so what? Always my favourite argument to debunk, I'd love to find you some statistics on varying orientations and how often they engage in such activities but I'm sure googling it would oblige.

At any rate, I shall now read the rest of your post before:

On topic; sadly some of us have to live with morons. My family are both homophobic and very racist. This made growing up as a bisexual both interesting and difficult. And when they eventually meet my girlfriend they will likely call her various unpleasant names for being both american and mexican in descent.

My advice? Just put up with it till you can move out and don't worry too much about it.
If you are gay (I'm not accusing you of anything, just a hypothetical), don't worry about it, say you're going to a strip club with your manly friends to look at tits instead of telling them you're going to your boyfriends house.

Dangit2019:

No, I don't want to rush the moving out process or make a run for Canada because while this topic is a bit upsetting to me, they usually don't act like idiots and this is just a very disturbing exception that I needed to get out of my system. I should mention that at least they're not racist too, or we would have an even bigger problem.

Don't rush it then but you'll probably just need to tolerate it sadly.

And from what I've been told by canadians I've met they have pretty shitty homophobia stuff going on there too.

My recommendation would be Sweden, because I'm yet to meet a Swede influenced by religion in any form beyond disdain for religion.

Boudica:

Shocksplicer:

Boudica:
The problem isn't hatred towards the group you support. The problem is hatred. You can't condemn a group for condemning another group, basically.

"I hate you because you hate them."

You don't combat differing opinions with disdain and anger, else you're as bad as them. You share your opinion and attempt to change their mind. If it fails, you move on. The only time you intervene and cease their rights is when they harm people. Simply being homophobic isn't harming homosexuals. If they were to, say, preach on the street corner that gay people are animals that need to be eradicated, then they can be stopped, as they are creating a dangerous environment.

Simply: don't become the thing you dislike. Be a force of love, not hate, and that's the best you can do.

While I agree that the diplomacy option is the better option is the best path, I just want to say that I have always hated the "If you hate the haters you're as bad as them."
Because you're not as bad as them. They're hating and discriminating against a group of people for no good reason. You're hating against them because they hate others for no good reason. It's a small difference, but crucial.

The don't hate the haters notion, is designed to end hatred. If you hate one group because they hate another group, you're effectively saying they are wrong and you are right, so your hate is 'correct'--the exact thing homophobes do.

And Hitler ate sugar. So I guess we better not do that! Oh wait, maybe the reason to dislike homophobes *isn't* because they say others are wrong and they are right therefore their hate is okay, it's because people against them disagree that their hate is okay.

Everyone thinks their position is right and the others are wrong. It's BS to try and say "Oh look X group you don't like thinks they're right and others are wrong therefore you shouldn't do it".

chadachada123:
The biggest issue I see, and one that, if resolved, could probably help a lot with the homophobia, is the fallacy that there is only Republican and Democrat.

Libertarianism is fucking awesome, and from a legal standpoint does not discriminate against homosexuality. Get your parents to recognize that not being Republican does not, in any sense, make you a liberal. This alone should, hopefully, make them realize that all choices are not binary.

I would mention Libertarianism, but that would be like an Olympic announcer talking about all the good track runners who never win the race.

Without joking though, have you not noticed that all they want and all they will strive for in politics is for things TO be binary? That way everybody gets to act like they're "the good guys" and everyone on the other side are "the bad guys" and they can act as if they're some messed up version of Luke Skywalker by projecting everything bad in the world on the other party. It really screws up the political system because now instead of people electing who they think is the smartest candidate, they choose whichever guy chooses to wave around his flag the most. Holy crap, maybe I should have posted this in R&P. (looks at religion threads) Oh wait never mind.

Mortai Gravesend:

Boudica:

Shocksplicer:

While I agree that the diplomacy option is the better option is the best path, I just want to say that I have always hated the "If you hate the haters you're as bad as them."
Because you're not as bad as them. They're hating and discriminating against a group of people for no good reason. You're hating against them because they hate others for no good reason. It's a small difference, but crucial.

The don't hate the haters notion, is designed to end hatred. If you hate one group because they hate another group, you're effectively saying they are wrong and you are right, so your hate is 'correct'--the exact thing homophobes do.

And Hitler ate sugar. So I guess we better not do that! Oh wait, maybe the reason to dislike homophobes *isn't* because they say others are wrong and they are right therefore their hate is okay, it's because people against them disagree that their hate is okay.

Everyone thinks their position is right and the others are wrong. It's BS to try and say "Oh look X group you don't like thinks they're right and others are wrong therefore you shouldn't do it".

Hm? I think you misunderstand.

I'm aiming for a world where no one hates anyone, because I feel hatred is a destructive emotion that is better handled in other ways. I don't know Hitler has to do with it o.O

Korolev:
snip

This. I'll just repeat this.

My family is similar. And y'know, upbringing is a huge deal, and if your family is around the age of mine, they have five or so decades of their own beliefs to stew in. You are not going to bring that down in a year, or ten years, or possibly ever.

My suggestion is, as depressing as it sounds, just don't even try. Older folk are really set in stone, and they have to be put up with, more than corrected. Especially if they're your family, since you will always be the kid to them, and kids aren't ever right, because Parents Are Wise.

Don't start that fight. It's not going to work.

Boudica:

Mortai Gravesend:

Boudica:
The don't hate the haters notion, is designed to end hatred. If you hate one group because they hate another group, you're effectively saying they are wrong and you are right, so your hate is 'correct'--the exact thing homophobes do.

And Hitler ate sugar. So I guess we better not do that! Oh wait, maybe the reason to dislike homophobes *isn't* because they say others are wrong and they are right therefore their hate is okay, it's because people against them disagree that their hate is okay.

Everyone thinks their position is right and the others are wrong. It's BS to try and say "Oh look X group you don't like thinks they're right and others are wrong therefore you shouldn't do it".

Hm? I think you misunderstand.

I'm aiming for a world where no one hates anyone, because I feel hatred is a destructive emotion that is better handled in other ways. I don't know Hitler has to do with it o.O

My point is just because homophobes think they're right and others are wrong and so what they're doing is okay does not somehow mean doing that is bad. That's now the part that's bad about them and it's nothing but guilt by association.

Mortai Gravesend:

Boudica:

Mortai Gravesend:

And Hitler ate sugar. So I guess we better not do that! Oh wait, maybe the reason to dislike homophobes *isn't* because they say others are wrong and they are right therefore their hate is okay, it's because people against them disagree that their hate is okay.

Everyone thinks their position is right and the others are wrong. It's BS to try and say "Oh look X group you don't like thinks they're right and others are wrong therefore you shouldn't do it".

Hm? I think you misunderstand.

I'm aiming for a world where no one hates anyone, because I feel hatred is a destructive emotion that is better handled in other ways. I don't know Hitler has to do with it o.O

My point is just because homophobes think they're right and others are wrong and so what they're doing is okay does not somehow mean doing that is bad. That's now the part that's bad about them and it's nothing but guilt by association.

wut

You've totally confused me lol.

SkarKrow:

Dangit2019:

No, I don't want to rush the moving out process or make a run for Canada because while this topic is a bit upsetting to me, they usually don't act like idiots and this is just a very disturbing exception that I needed to get out of my system. I should mention that at least they're not racist too, or we would have an even bigger problem.

Don't rush it then but you'll probably just need to tolerate it sadly.

And from what I've been told by canadians I've met they have pretty shitty homophobia stuff going on there too.

My recommendation would be Sweden, because I'm yet to meet a Swede influenced by religion in any form beyond disdain for religion.

Remember where Texas is, it's not very close to Sweden and besides, my concept of Sweden is a country filled with a million people who sound like PewDiePie (because I spend way too much time on the Internet). Maybe I'll try Mexico; hold on for a second.

(gets on bus)
(crosses border)
(finds local hotel)
(gets shot by cartels in nearby turf war)
(crawls back onto bus)
(applies pressure to wound)
(gets home)
(turns laptop on)

Nope, that didn't work either. Crap.

Boudica:

Mortai Gravesend:

Boudica:
Hm? I think you misunderstand.

I'm aiming for a world where no one hates anyone, because I feel hatred is a destructive emotion that is better handled in other ways. I don't know Hitler has to do with it o.O

My point is just because homophobes think they're right and others are wrong and so what they're doing is okay does not somehow mean doing that is bad. That's now the part that's bad about them and it's nothing but guilt by association.

wut

You've totally confused me lol.

This:

If you hate one group because they hate another group, you're effectively saying they are wrong and you are right, so your hate is 'correct'--the exact thing homophobes do.

It's nonsense. Homophobes aren't bad because they say they're right and others are wrong.

Well I'm assuming you're family is religious judging by how strongly they feel about gay people (being religious isn't wrong. I'm religious too). I would just tell them what I always like to tell people.

Jesus hung out with prostitutes, thieves, con artists, and just general assholes and loved them all. Tell your family they should follow his example.

It's about the only way I can think of to combat the religious ignorance.

EDIT: That's not to say it always works.

well simple, just buy some gay porn and hide it under their pillows when they sleep, then watch as they freak out and starts calling each other faggots, make sure to buy a magazine for yourself and hide it under your pillow so you look like a victim too.

What kind of outcome do you want? Do you want them to change opinions, do you want to be respected for holding a different opinion, do you want good arguments for some cause, or do you just want some emotional peace of mind and just not be annoyed by their opinions?

Curiously, they also seem to be using at least one of the following in their argumentation: http://www.cracked.com/article_16656_6-brainwashing-techniques-theyre-using-you-right-now.html

Mortai Gravesend:

Boudica:

Mortai Gravesend:

My point is just because homophobes think they're right and others are wrong and so what they're doing is okay does not somehow mean doing that is bad. That's now the part that's bad about them and it's nothing but guilt by association.

wut

You've totally confused me lol.

This:

If you hate one group because they hate another group, you're effectively saying they are wrong and you are right, so your hate is 'correct'--the exact thing homophobes do.

It's nonsense. Homophobes aren't bad because they say they're right and others are wrong.

I think homophobic people harbor negative ideas. I also feel people that hate and condemn others for their opinions are destructive. Both homophobes and the people that hate them are contributing to the existence of hatred. One group detests homosexuals. The other despises people that detest homosexuals. I would like both to take a step back and put their emotion and energy into something more constructive.

Are you disagreeing with me? I'm not really sure what your intentions are.

Are you gay? Is there serious risk of being disowned if you are, and if your parents found out?

If that's the case, I would avoid the topic thoroughly until you're old and independent enough that you will not be in any serious danger.

If not, well. You make the argument against homophobia to your family. However, you cannot force them to change their minds. You may find that you convince them not in the short-run, but in the very long-run. So you just have to be patient. If queried, make your arguments, but do not force your world-view upon them.

You just have to be patient.

My family is also quite homophobic and very heated discussions often crop up in the house. Especially with this Chik-fil-a situation that has been going on. It usually degrades into a shouting match which then goes into religion and even into really deep politics.

At the end of the day, my family still loves me and I still love my family. It's not a big deal, they're people and they have opinions that differ from yours or even the majority of the world.

I guess what I'm trying to say is, deal with it. Just let them think what they want to think and you think what you want to think, because in the grand scheme of things... none of you will ever know if you were the right one, and it is very rare for someone to just change their mind.

What they're feeling is perfectly reasonable. You see they don't don't want to catch the gay virus; me personally, I'm just waiting until they develop a vaccine for they gay. It's such a tragic disease one day you're a normal vagina loving man, and then you get too close to one of the gays, and BAM! You're suddenly wearing assless chaps, and dancing in a rave while a skinny Filipino gives you a rim job. Damn you science why do you continue to fail us? How many more of our sons must suffer the indignity of knowing how to match curtains with couches before you listen? How many?

DarkRyter:
What you need to do is to give them a good lashing.

They won't have enough time to be homophobic when they're picking cotton on them fields.

Of course, this is all hinging on you being a plantation owner in the 1800's.

I laughed so hard at this. No idea why.

OT: Its your family. Not much you can do and if you ruin the relationship its hard to fix and you cannot really get another family. I mean don't do anything rash. Let them know you feel differently and try to avoid the topic.

Dangit2019:

SkarKrow:

Dangit2019:

No, I don't want to rush the moving out process or make a run for Canada because while this topic is a bit upsetting to me, they usually don't act like idiots and this is just a very disturbing exception that I needed to get out of my system. I should mention that at least they're not racist too, or we would have an even bigger problem.

Don't rush it then but you'll probably just need to tolerate it sadly.

And from what I've been told by canadians I've met they have pretty shitty homophobia stuff going on there too.

My recommendation would be Sweden, because I'm yet to meet a Swede influenced by religion in any form beyond disdain for religion.

Remember where Texas is, it's not very close to Sweden and besides, my concept of Sweden is a country filled with a million people who sound like PewDiePie (because I spend way too much time on the Internet). Maybe I'll try Mexico; hold on for a second.

(gets on bus)
(crosses border)
(finds local hotel)
(gets shot by cartels in nearby turf war)
(crawls back onto bus)
(applies pressure to wound)
(gets home)
(turns laptop on)

Nope, that didn't work either. Crap.

Sorry I totally skipped over the Texas part of your post and knowing it now explains a lot.

Sweden has a lot of athiests and very nice people. If I recall Canada is pretty fucking far away too for you.

I'll also point out that homophobia is probably a pretty big thing in Mexico too.

My opinion the hate issue: Hating a group, even if you are sure that they are wrong, is not necessarily your best option because feelings can seriously cloud your judgement and make you susceptible to manipulation by "we vs. them". You will start to see what your feelings want you to see (and quite literally so - read up on your subconscious), and your feelings (hate) ultimately just want to see the despair of your enemies and not a well implemented solution. Hate is a useful feeling for other things like survival, not so great for high quality decision-making.

My folks are Catholic, the pretty old school kind as well (Italian mother and an Irish father). They are against homosexuality, pre-marital sex and a whole host of other things which I have taken for granted as being acceptable and normal in the modern age.

They are however, very kind people. My dad reads a lot on philosophy and other religions, and although he disagrees with some of these issues because of his religion, he still treats people with respect. For him, people are people, and even if you disagree with him on some fundamental issues, it doesn't change the fact that you are still entitled to the same human rights as he is.

I'd encourage you to try and get your parents to read (could be films or documentaries) into some topics which might change their thinking about the variety of human experience. Whether its notes or studies on cultures which are very different to your own, or biographies of exceptional individuals who persevered through adversity. The key is to help them see how different doesn't have to be worse.

Dangit2019:

Now, if you've read a few of my posts, you probably know that I live in Texas because I just keep mentioning it for some reason. Texas is part of Southern America, and tends to retain most of the hyper conservatism that has been associated with the area. My family, sadly, is no different.

snip

since you live in texas and are normal "conservative" types, can i assume your family is also christian?
if that is the case then the bible states specifically that homosexuality is a sin, however it lumps it in with numerous other sins such as adultery, jealously, greed, ect. essentially the problem is that homosexuality has been bloated out of proportions, yes, it is a sin according to christian beliefs, but there are plenty of things that we all do all the time that could be considered just as bad.

instead of using the old arguments of "how is it hurting you?" just tell them they should only judge if they themselves have committed no sin. since they obviously have, tell them that in the eyes of there own god, they are no better then the gays.

as for myself, I'm a proud Libertarian, and am of the opinion that the government should not have any say in what marriage means one way or the other, and leave it up to the people, however a christian that holds the idea that homosexuality is ok is by definition a hypocrite.

Flamezdudes:
I tend to just ignore it, however for me the only person i'm aware of in my family being homophobic is my father, although he's not violently opposed to them, he just makes loads of snide gestures and says thing that clearly show he's homophobic... which can get very annoying.

So I can't really help you out since you family seems a lot more homophobic than mine is... however I would just try my best to ignore because you obviously aren't going to be able to convince them since they're so stuck in their beliefs that they won't listen to anything you have to say.

Speaking as someone in his late teens I can fully understand why people hate teenagers.

The others not so much.

Coming a bit late to this, but:

You are fully justified in rationally hating people who irrationally hate others.

But you aren't going to change them. Nothing you can say or do is likely to affect their viewpoints. The only thing you can do is make them disown you.

Now, this is where I'm supposed to say that's what you should do, that you shouldn't tolerate intolerance, make a moral stand etc. But losing your family over a moral issue that doesn't directly affect you...yeah, there's always going to be reasons to avoid doing that, and I couldn't blame you for taking them.

I think all you can do is say that you abhor their beliefs and that's simply because you disagree with hating any group of people for being what they fundamentally must be. Beyond that, just avoid arguments. Repeat that phrase no matter what superstitious hate they spew. You've got to stick to your morals.

Or, for lolz, say "Yes, I think gays are disgusting and I hate them" and then start cross-dressing. Just to see their reaction.

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