Stupid things you believed as a kid

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Ive seen this thread before, cant remember if it was on here or somewhere else, but a lot of funny stuff was said so;
What is the dumbest thing you believed as a kid?

Personally i thought untill the age of about 11 that cats were baby dogs, and that my mum could change the volume of the radio with her mind, thanks to one of those volume dials on the steering wheel.

I remember reading about someone whose brother told him the electrical transformer at the bottom of his garden was a space ship his parents were slowly charging to send him back to his home planet, and when he reached 12 he would finally make this grand voyage.

Another one that happened as an adult was managing to convince my friend whilst staying in a rat infested hostel that the rats were just "ground squirrels", i think she believes it to this day

anyway, what are the dumb things you thought as a kid?

1. Monsters - I loved reading about monsters (still do) but I thought they were real. Fun times.

2. Santa Claus - Believing in a nigh omniscient patriarch who punishes you for being naughty and rewards you for being nice. Silly parents, that's not a good way to get your children to act good.

3. The Christian God - Believing in a nigh omniscient patriarch who punishes you for being naughty and rewards you for being nice. Silly parents, that's not a good way to get your children to act good.

I believed/was afraid my heart would get clogged up if I swallowed my gum, which I did a lot as a little kid due to sheer automatism.

I thought Posh Spice had a penis due to a certain wet dream I had that took place on top of a toilet as a child. I was young...probably too much information...

Right.

Santa Claus like every other kid the tooth fairy i still don't get how my mom got money under my pillow.

i had a female friend who was unaware that men and women had different sexual organs until she was 18
the way she found out was a male friend of hers convinced her his job was "banana bender" and made her reach into his pants to prove it

that is a 100% true story and the lady in question is far from mentally challenged, she just led a sheltered life

Got another pretty common one, always flirted with the notion that i was the only real human on earth and everyone else was a robot or part of some elaborate dream, still think like that sometimes

lechat:
i had a female friend who was unaware that men and women had different sexual organs until she was 18
the way she found out was a male friend of hers convinced her his job was "banana bender" and made her reach into his pants to prove it

that is a 100% true story and the lady in question is far from mentally challenged, she just led a sheltered life

Gosh, I thought the same, but that stopped when I was about age 5-6. I can't imagine someone thinking that at 18! Yikes. What a rude way to be introduced, men are pigs.

Rose and Thorn:

lechat:
i had a female friend who was unaware that men and women had different sexual organs until she was 18
the way she found out was a male friend of hers convinced her his job was "banana bender" and made her reach into his pants to prove it

that is a 100% true story and the lady in question is far from mentally challenged, she just led a sheltered life

Gosh, I thought the same, but that stopped when I was about age 5-6. I can't imagine someone thinking that at 18! Yikes. What a rude way to be introduced, men are pigs.

yes men are pigs in fact we even have little curly tails in our pants... just reach in here and i can prove it....

lechat:

Rose and Thorn:

lechat:
i had a female friend who was unaware that men and women had different sexual organs until she was 18
the way she found out was a male friend of hers convinced her his job was "banana bender" and made her reach into his pants to prove it

that is a 100% true story and the lady in question is far from mentally challenged, she just led a sheltered life

Gosh, I thought the same, but that stopped when I was about age 5-6. I can't imagine someone thinking that at 18! Yikes. What a rude way to be introduced, men are pigs.

yes men are pigs in fact we even have little curly tails in our pants... just reach in here and i can prove it....

Bah, haha. That made me giggle and I am responding to this because I wanted you to know I enjoyed your "comeback"! :)

When I was little my parents told me that toothpaste was poisonous and swallowing any would make me sick. It made brushing my teeth a very stressful experience for several years.

On the other hand, I never believed in Santa or the Tooth Fairy or the Easter Bunny. It got me into several playground fights.

I stopped believing in santa when i realised he happened to have the same ring as my grandad, and that he would always appear as my grandad went out to get something from the car.

I think i kept up the pretence of believing in him for a while though, just because if you attribute the presents you get to a god like deity with armies of slaves building toys then there isnt really much of an upper price limit on what you could ask for.

As to how the money from the tooth fairy got under your pillow, i busted my parents putting it there when they came to tuck me in

lechat:
i had a female friend who was unaware that men and women had different sexual organs...

haha kids-

until she was 18

THE FUCK!!???

that is a 100% true story and the lady in question is far from mentally challenged, she just led a sheltered life

sheltered? more like sealed inside an airtight time capsule and buried under 100feet of concrete...

seriously though there is somthing SERIOUSLY wrong there..how could you not figure it out in 18 years of life? didnt she SEE that men don't have breasts.?..can't she see there is a bulge there when men wear tight pants? did she never watch a damn movie with a rating over G? what the hell is up with the parents?

OT: that women and men are seen as eaqual in our society :(

adamsaccount:
Got another pretty common one, always flirted with the notion that i was the only real human on earth and everyone else was a robot or part of some elaborate dream, still think like that sometimes

isnbt that what they call sociopathy? or psychopathy?

I belive in God when I was a kid:

You made it too easy there OP. Oh yeah, Santa Claus.

-I only believed in God because I thought the Pope was immortal.

-I thought people used to live in black and white.

-My sister convinced me there were werewolves living in the graveyard I had to walk through to get to school.

I'm sure there are more, I was a pretty gullible kid for a while.

Vault101:

adamsaccount:
Got another pretty common one, always flirted with the notion that i was the only real human on earth and everyone else was a robot or part of some elaborate dream, still think like that sometimes

isnbt that what they call sociopathy? or psychopathy?

Thats a bingo

Psychopathy (/saɪˈkɒpəθi/[1][2] is a personality disorder that has been variously characterized by shallow emotions (including reduced fear, a lack of empathy, and stress tolerance), coldheartedness, egocentricity, superficial charm, manipulativeness, irresponsibility, impulsivity, criminality, antisocial behavior, a lack of remorse, and a parasitic lifestyle.

Now im going to go and listen to creep by radio head

:(

When I was young, I thought I could fly.

It was a very painful lesson.

In elementary school, I was a very gullible kid, and everyone else was basically THAT guy, whose distant relative catched Mews under trucks and worked at Nintendo.
I believed a lot of stuff.

Piorn:
In elementary school, I was a very gullible kid, and everyone else was basically THAT guy, whose distant relative catched Mews under trucks and worked at Nintendo.
I believed a lot of stuff.

Ah yeah you and me both, at the age of about 10 a friend had me convinced that he ran his own pornsite and went to take photos of beautiful naked women after school

adamsaccount:

Piorn:
In elementary school, I was a very gullible kid, and everyone else was basically THAT guy, whose distant relative catched Mews under trucks and worked at Nintendo.
I believed a lot of stuff.

Ah yeah you and me both, at the age of about 10 a friend had me convinced that he ran his own pornsite and went to take photos of beautiful naked women after school

One of my friends claimed he had a space rocket, that flew so fast you could only see it if you looked at the sun and then quickly looked away and closing your eyes. The line you'd see would be where it flew across the sky.
That was when I started to doubt things.

Arakasi:
3. The Christian God - Believing in a nigh omniscient patriarch who punishes you for being naughty and rewards you for being nice. Silly parents, that's not a good way to get your children to act good.

*slow clap*

Congratulations - we got a whole 0 posts without unnecessary sectarianism -.-

Up until about kindergarten, I believed people used to live in black and white. Yeah, it's not exactly a question that pops up naturally and parents/adults can't be blamed for not thinking about this one.

I believed the furry folks and mechatronics at the fun fair to be real, deformed and angry live animals up until about age three or so. It was quite a relieve when I figured it out, as that stuff was super creepy. Like some evil monkey that popped out of some box that was far too small to hide a whole monkey in it.

Oh, and I still believe in God. I know he does not exist, I ain't stupid. But I know very well that the idea of God exists, and in my little bubble of multicultural, multi-faceted life experiences, God is of prime importance, especially when interacting with children from different cultures/religions/cults... and their parents. I just find God to be much more helpful and efficient than Santa Che, Saint Marx or Papa Smurf Engels.

If it weren't for the generally accepted notion of God, we'd be bashing each others heads in, and it wouldn't even be a proper survival of the fittest, it would be survival of the most ferocious.

That does not cover the aspect of religious fantards that kill and hate in the name of their respective, superiour God, mind you.

Phasmal:
I thought people used to live in black and white.

Oh my God, me too!

I also believed my sister invented the word 'shit', because she was the first person I heard say it.

That there were no stupid questions.

What a crock, there are plenty of stupid questions, you can see a ton of them on this damned site! :P

For the longest time, even some months after sex-ed toward the end of Elementary school, I thought babies were born out of a woman's butthole.

I was a dumb child.

I thought The Moon was just another Earth and that every Earth only had one country so if you wanted to go somewhere you had to travel by space ship

Subscriptism:

Vault101:

lechat:
i had a female friend who was unaware that men and women had different sexual organs...

haha kids-

until she was 18

THE FUCK!!???

that is a 100% true story and the lady in question is far from mentally challenged, she just led a sheltered life

sheltered? more like sealed inside an airtight time capsule and buried under 100feet of concrete...

seriously though there is somthing SERIOUSLY wrong there..how could you not figure it out in 18 years of life? didnt she SEE that men don't have breasts.?..can't she see there is a bulge there when men wear tight pants? did she never watch a damn movie with a rating over G? what the hell is up with the parents?

OT: that women and men are seen as eaqual in our society :(

adamsaccount:
Got another pretty common one, always flirted with the notion that i was the only real human on earth and everyone else was a robot or part of some elaborate dream, still think like that sometimes

isnbt that what they call sociopathy? or psychopathy?

Solipsism

Er well fuck thats a new diagnosis for me! Thanks a lot!

Also you might want to add some more words (like a full definition of solipsism) to your posts so that the mods dont come after you.

As a child I believed people could potentially be worth wile.

The naive nature of childhood I guess.

Vault101:

lechat:
i had a female friend who was unaware that men and women had different sexual organs...

haha kids-

until she was 18

THE FUCK!!???

that is a 100% true story and the lady in question is far from mentally challenged, she just led a sheltered life

sheltered? more like sealed inside an airtight time capsule and buried under 100feet of concrete...

seriously though there is somthing SERIOUSLY wrong there..how could you not figure it out in 18 years of life? didnt she SEE that men don't have breasts.?..can't she see there is a bulge there when men wear tight pants? did she never watch a damn movie with a rating over G? what the hell is up with the parents?

OT: that women and men are seen as eaqual in our society :(

adamsaccount:
Got another pretty common one, always flirted with the notion that i was the only real human on earth and everyone else was a robot or part of some elaborate dream, still think like that sometimes

isnbt that what they call sociopathy? or psychopathy?

Men have breasts.
Hell in America, men have some of the biggest breasts.

Also, why are none of the pictures showing up now?

That night would never end until I fell asleep.

And as of right now its only a couple of hours until dawn that I'm typing this.

Pretty much anything you had a mind to tell me

along with:-
It was possible to become a power Ranger.
Thomas the Tank's island home (Sodor or something) was a real place where sentient trains were developed.
I was the world's greatest child artist.
I was special (I'm not and no neither are you).

Hoplon:
As a child I believed people could potentially be worth wile.

The naive nature of childhood I guess.

Wow, I think this post could be darker. Try harder next time.

OT: I used to think all adults were smart and knew what they were doing.

If you were going to Antarctica you had to wear suction cups on your feet or you'd fall into space. Also that the world was a hollow sphere of water and when you were under the ocean, you were inside the Earth. Both at age 4. I also wanted to be a tiger when I grew up.

I used to think that credit cards were basically free money. Although, in fairness, credit cards are pretty damn complicated, and I'm sure most adults don't really understand how they work, which is a bit scary considering how many of these people probably use them on a regular basis.

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