So, whenever a particually attractive girl surfaces on the televison or movie screen (like Liv Tyler) and you are watching the entertaining feature with your other half, is it appropriate to comment on the hotness of the lady in question?

I ask this because my other half makes a habit of pointing out to me that Syler (Zachary Quinto) from Heroes is very attractive on a near enough regular basis when he appears on tv to eat his precious hero brains. But when i say "Well in that case, Maya is hot." she gets all huffy. Another example of gender inequality or just a rule of relationships i was not told about. Lets get some discussion on this.

(Maya is hot though...)

Oh and a cookie for your vote!

This depends on the individual you are with.

I'd say in this situation she's being unreasonable, if she makes a habit of pointing out attractive males then she should expect you to respond in kind. That being said, it doesn't matter if she's being unreasonable, if it bothers her and you care about her feelings you should stop. Similarly if it bothers you that she finds Sylar attractive let her know and you should expect the same respect.

Fuck yes-- in fact, if you don't comment, you lose man-points.

Women need to get over themselves. Just because they feel inadequate doesn't mean we should be restricted from saying what we are biologically hardwired to say-- "Holy shit, that chick is hot."

Its not like she gets epicly upset. Usualy i just get a
"No, you don't get to think that."

And her pointing out Sylers attractiveness bothers me not.

(Edit due to terrible grammars lawl)

I voted yes, but with exceptions. Allow me to elucidate.

First thing's first, and by no means should this be taken as an "only" situation, this is a very "based on my experience" comment. Women are usually fickle, insecure little creatures. When they're not, they're usually distrusting. Assuming you see a stranger walking down the street, and it is early on in a relationship, her first instinct will be to get angry, jealous, and quite suspicious. The reason for this extreme of reaction, I can't imagine, but it's been an easy thing to understand that these things happen.

Secondly, consider the opposite role. While not always a good indicator of the level of irritation, move the extreme slider up and put yourself in her shoes (wear socks, heels cause blisters pretty bad). Would you feel alright with your girlfriend looking at a tall, muscular dude in a bar and saying, "I want him inside me, will you still be here in a few hours?" That is the kind of thing that is sometimes assumed (via subtext) whenever a guy says a girl is hot. Therefore, if that's what you say, that's also what you mean to imply, regardless of whether or not you meant to do so.

Thirdly, subtexts. Women read them, from everything. Every little thing has a subtext to it, so start thinking about what you're implying as you're speaking. It doesn't matter if you mean to, you still are.

Aaaand, that about sums it up for me. No cookie necessary, although I'm very likely going to get flamed to hell for this. (I'm not sexist, just speaking from my observations.) That is all, carry on.

vxicepickxv:
This depends on the individual you are with.

Bam!

What a clever thread.

This will end well.

Hmmm.... Most of the girls I know/dated would either agree or are bi.

Basically: if the relationship is in a rocky situation (long distance, someone cheated, etc) it's not cool. Otherwise the 'other half' needs confidence/trust. Whether that confidence comes due to your intentional devotion or they find it themselves is, at least partially, up to you.

Haha! I misread the question! Voted "No" & meant to vote "Yes". Darn assumption of negation!

Well since you are offering cookies...
Actually I see no problem with it. Both my boyfriend and I point out the exceptionally attractive people we see, regardless of sex. This may be because of the difficulty in spotting the hottie, due to our combined distaste for modern fashion, or just because we're both secure about ourselves and each other.
So I personally think the problem stems from self esteem rather than anything else.

Hell yes its a good thing, to be honest its normally my missus that points out sexy ladies. Hmm maybe this int a good thing but it makes me happy :)

Nom Nom Nom cookie

If a girl says "that guy's pretty hot" when I'm dating her, I'd take a look and cast my opinion. Generally they have the presence of mind to not say things like that when we're hanging out, but if they do it's a "Hell yeah I'd hit that, high five!" Because it's the response they don't expect if it's the first time they say it. After that it's a casual "Yay or nay" on my part. They can think what they want, I can think what I want. I know relationships are all about communication, but bugger that.

Don't ask, don't tell. I won't make comments about attractive ladies, you won't make comments about attractive men.

I don't there is ever anything "wrong" with pointing out attractive people on the TV. But I think it's highly likely that some girls would think it was not appropriate.

I think its kinda hypocritical that we can point out beautiful artworks, poems, songs, landscapes, buildings, sunsets etc but not beautiful people. Whats the difference? I am saying this as a man though, I know loadsa women have a different opinion.

Really depends on how up-tight your girlfriend is..

AuntyEthel:
I think its kinda hypocritical that we can point out beautiful artworks, poems, songs, landscapes, buildings, sunsets etc but not beautiful people. Whats the difference? I am saying this as a man though, I know loadsa women have a different opinion.

I was explaining a similar point to my friends a few weeks back after some drunken shenanigans in the local park. I don't think any of them quite got it though. :(

NewClassic:
Would you feel alright with your girlfriend looking at a tall, muscular dude in a bar and saying, "I want him inside me, will you still be here in a few hours?" [

That made us both laugh... epically. Cookie for you.

This argument seems to stem from the whole "Are men and women equal?" question of which i feel would be better answered in another post... if at all (some things are best left to float in the aether of our minds/cake. I want some cake... or a muffin. I have to work with muffins all day and i get to have none? Is that fair? But oh look, I deviated... again)

And a cookie to everyone else that replied :D

I had the same problem. My ex had a huge poster of Orlando Bloom hanging on her door because she thought he was hot. Over the two and a half years we dated, she never took it down. told her countless times I didn't like it (mainly because I found it disconcerting to have Orlando Bloom watching us at all times we were in there) but she never bothered to remove it.

I have an odd taste in music; I love hardcore metal but I will listen to stuff like Shakira because I like songs sung in another language. I have Suerte on my Ipod (Whenever, Wherever in spanish to those who don't know) and it came on while we were driving in my car one day. About halfway through the song I realized she seemed kind of upset so I asked her what was wrong. Basically, her problem was that I had that song on my Ipod. She thought that I liked it because it "sounded sexy" and was jealous of it. She then asked me to take it off my Ipod.

How exactly is this fair?

DC_Josh:
Its not like she gets epicly upset. Usualy i just get a
"No, you don't get to think that."

And her pointing out Sylers attractiveness bothers me not.

(Edit due to terrible grammars lawl)

I see this problem a lot with men today. Women think they have supreme control over everything that goes on in a relationship, including shit that goes on in our heads.

To all men: stop being such pussies. Stop wearing those gay polo shirts because your girlfriend tells you to. Stop paying for every dinner or movie. Stop listening to whatever music she wants when you're in the car.

Yes, chivalry is dead. It was a shitty idea in the first place-- women don't deserve to be eternally pampered and treated special just because they have a hole where their penis should be.

AuntyEthel:
I think its kinda hypocritical that we can point out beautiful artworks, poems, songs, landscapes, buildings, sunsets etc but not beautiful people. Whats the difference? I am saying this as a man though, I know loadsa women have a different opinion.

But the key factor is you cannot have "teh sex" with a poem. Unless you like that kinda thing...Do you?

No I don't think a boyfriend should. For married people though, I think it is totally acceptable, even expected. My wife is constantly telling me how hot Hugh Jackman is and I'm constantly telling her how hot...well the list is too long really.

Eggo:

That depends on how insecure that other person (and/or you) are with themselves.

Please don't bring about some excursion into reverse gender inequality or something equally silly.

Yeah trying to stay away from that, its a sticky mess of brambles, metaphorically of course. Unless you date plants.

Yeah it depends ONLY on 2 things really.

1) The person you are with. (Does he/she tolerate such comments or not?)
2) Do you tolerate someone who doesn't tolerate "that girl/guy is hot".

If you both point out good looking members of the opposite sex, and you are both fine with it, then it's all good.

If she/he is opposed to it, and you are not; do you think you can live with that?

Maybe it's more about how you say it than the words themselves. If its a casual observation, then I don't think many girls would be upset by that. Of course if your eyes are fighting to stay in your skull, then maybe that isn't appropriate.

HSIAMetalKing:

Yes, chivalry is dead. It was a shitty idea in the first place-- women don't deserve to be eternally pampered and treated special just because they have a hole where their penis should be.

Hah!

I don't think it's that nice to point hot guys/girls. It's just going to make the other person feel inadequate.

@ novajam:
Only if they already have confidence issues, or are just being a pain in the ass for no good reason.

its ok if they are on TV in fact my girlfriend normally points out the hot girls for me and always comments on the guys. It doesn't bother me as the chances of them meeting in real life are pretty slim. I dont think she minds when i point out the hot girls either but most of the time i do it to wind her up. I'm a bit funny like that.

Downside:
its ok if they are on TV in fact my girlfriend normally points out the hot girls for me and always comments on the guys. It doesn't bother me as the chances of them meeting in real life are pretty slim. I dont think she minds when i point out the hot girls either but most of the time i do it to wind her up. I'm a bit funny like that.

I do it for the same reasons these days my friend :)

But Sylar is hot, and I'm a guy o.0
I wouldn't ever do it out of courtesy towards my significant other, I would be thinking "damn, she's hot" but I would definately under no circumstances whatsoever actually say it, I'm good at keeping my mouth shut for things like that that I know will(most likely)start something. However, on the other hand, if they comment on a guy then the gloves are off lol.

I'm not sure what this says about me but I don't "check out" guys per se, I'll give them props where props are due, for example yesterday I saw this guy with a six pack walking around with his shirt off, I thought he looked cool and all that but that was it.

In(slightly)related news Aizen is one devilishly, handsome sexy beast and if I was gay I would do him:D
Cake to anyone who knows who I'm talking about:)

Even if as a guy you are kidding or it is some ok for you to say that with your girlfreind around..... IT IS NEVER OK TO SAY THAT! Are you effing joking unless you have an amazingly tollerant girlfreind who knows you are all hers your asking to get your head ripped off all mortal kombat fatality style. Really all jokes aside its generaly ganna be a really bad idea. Unneeded fights are good for no-one.

~'Tis better in the long run if you don't, as standard. What is logically fair-game in our minds is not necessarily the same for the significant other - from experience.

AntiAntagonist:
Haha! I misread the question! Voted "No" & meant to vote "Yes". Darn assumption of negation!

Haha, same. I think it's fine if the guy your with points out someone they think is good looking, just not too much detail.

Yes, but you have to immediately (and I mean immediately) follow up, 'but she's not as hot as you,'