2010 Billboard Top 100 Review: #75-71

I swear, I'll try to get a steady schedule down for this.

#75: "Rock That Body" by Black Eyed Peas

What can I say about the Black Eyed Peas that hasn't already been said by others? They are a band that writes songs for the club, and usually can't even get that right. But when they do, it's actually pretty solid (see: "Let's Get It Started").

Well, the beat's off to a great start. Basically, just imagine the most annoying synth fuzz, with two keys getting hit, and you have the main beat. The drums are pretty good, though. As for the singing, will.i.am is not very good, but he is Freddie Mercury compared to Fergie, who is autotuned to sound stupidly high-pitched and gender-neutral.

As for the lyrics, it is as deep as most BEP songs. Will.i.am wants to rock a girl's body...in bed. That's about all there is to the song, besides describing how hot the girl is.

Overall, this song is...not that good, but it is not bad by BEP standards. The synth rhythm is annoying, Fergie is even more annoying than usual, and will.i.am is not exactly stunning himself. That said, the lyrics are not terrible enough to distract, and the song is catchy, which is about all you can ask from BEP.

#74: "Already Gone" by Kelly Clarkson

I can't remember if this is during the period where she started coasting on her success and re-writing the same song repeatedly or just before it. Only one way to find out.

Music is fairly unique for Kelly Clarkson, being mostly piano and cello driven, but with a drum beat. As for the singing, Kelly Clarkson is solid as always, showing a decent range and not slipping off-key.

As for the lyrics, this is not a normal song for Kelly Clarkson. Basically, she is assuring her man that while they had good times together, and he treated her great, they just aren't working out and need to end things before they get to the point where things will get bitter.

It's refreshing hearing something other than an angry break-up song from Kelly Clarkson, and she does a great job here. The lyrics and singing work perfectly together, showing a break-up that is regretfully necessary, and the music backs up the general somber feeling perfectly. To me, this is the best Kelly Clarkson song I've heard.

#73: "My First Kiss" by Ke$ha and 3OH!3

A hard-drinking party girl persona and a group of fratboy personas team up in this Jersey Shore of songs!

The music is basically clapping hands with occasional random synth blaring up, until the chorus which features drums and an even more annoying synth beat. As for the singing...it sounds like the cast of Jersey Shore trying to sing, which is nowhere near as good as it sounds.

As for the lyrics, what do you think this is about? It's about the first kiss of the singers. Yet somehow, despite the relatively innocent theme, the artists make this song sound as dirty as an episode of Game of Thrones, which definitely takes something close to talent.

This song is terrible. The music is loud without really being catchy, the singing is pretty bad even by the standards of these two artists, and they took something like kissing and made it feel disgusting. I feel like I need a shower after this song.

#72: "Two is Better Than One" by Boys Like Girls feat. Taylor Swift

Who? *research* Ah, a pop rock group from Massachusetts, one of the most annoying states to try to spell. As for Taylor Swift, she is the Avril Lavigne of country.

Music is different from what I expected. It is a simple acoustic guitar line, nothing more, until the drums and piano kick in during the second verse. It does sound pretty nice, though. As for the singing, the lead singer has a pretty nice if generic voice, and does a really good job harmonizing with Taylor Swift, who sounds as good as usual.

As for the lyrics, this is a fairly basic love song. The two singers are singing about how much they love each other, with the male lead thinking the title thought.

This is...a really sweet song. There's nothing wrong with that, if you are in the mood for a gentle song that has genuine emotion and chemistry. The music is simple, allowing the decent lyrics and singing to take center stage, showcasing just how well the two voices work together. This is one of the best love songs to come out of the 2010's so far. Not the best, mind you, but up there.

#71: "Forever" by Drake feat. Kanye West, Lil Wayne, and Eminem

Well, Drake does release at least one good song a year. And while Kanye West tends to suck at guest verses, and I've never been a fan of Lil Wayne, this was also Eminem's comeback year. This could go either way.

Music definitely seems Kanye-inspired. Keyboard banging repetitively, with a drum machine backing it up. As for the rapping, Drake is as autotuned as he always is when not singing. Lil Wayne is really obnoxious, unless you like him, in which case you will here, except for painful rhymes ("harvest", "target", and "New Orleans" do not rhyme!). Kanye is extremely lazy, as demonstrated by his dragging out the end of many lines, and rhyming "loser" with "Bueller". Eminem is the best of the four, but even he is clearly not on his game, possibly a sign he didn't really feel like doing this song, but had contractual obligations. That's total conjecture on my part, though.

As for the lyrics, Drake is basically rapping about how he built himself up from nothing, and wants his career to go on forever, then bragging about how big he is, and how he can tell girls he loves them, then not call them. The guest rappers decide to skip straight to the bragging, for better or for worse (hint: it's the second one).

This song is pretty bad. Almost any time you get a rap song with more than two rappers on it, you are asking for trouble. The rather obnoxious lyrics don't help, of course, but the main problem is that Drake gets overshadowed on his own song, delegated to doing the chorus while the others handle the verses. well, that and the terribad lyrics.

Well, that list was...let's just move on.

Previously: #80-76

Next: #70-66

 

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