WrestleMania XXX Review | |
![]() WrestleMania XXX wound up being a grand total of six hours in length. Sure, two of those hours were on the WrestleMania Pre-Show, and during those first two hours there was only a single match -- available only to Americans, so it won't be reviewed here -- but the entire event is as big as any other sporting event finale. The only difference is that professional wrestling doesn't end for several months after its big show. It continues the very next day with Raw. And after this specific WrestleMania, Raw is likely going to be something that is incredibly memorable. It's worth noting that the match on the Pre-Show, the fatal four-way tag team match for the WWE Tag Team Championships, was won by The Usos, as anyone would have suspected. More importantly, though, is that the Real Americans (Jack Swagger and Cesaro) seemed to finally split after the match. Swagger put Cesaro in the Patriot Lock, Zeb Colter (their manager) tried to make him apologize, and then Cesaro took Swagger on the Big Swing. That's what we missed by not being Americans and not even having the option to subscribe to the WWE Network. The actual program -- the four-hour part that you pay $70 to see -- kicked off with "Real American," signaling the entrance of Hulk Hogan, a wrestler your dad remembers better than you do. He's the WrestleMania XXX host, which you might presume means he'll be doing something of interest. Actually, he's in two segments. This opening, and an incoherent one later on involving "Hot Rod" Roddy Piper, Mr. T, and Paul Orndorff. The opening ends with both "Stone Cold" Steve Austin and The Rock coming out and attempting to make people who used to watch the WWE/F feel good about having watched it. Hogan flubbed almost all of his lines, and even Austin and The Rock had a couple of of issues on the mic. It's almost as if -- and get this -- you don't practice something, you start to get worse at it. Performing live in front of a sold out Mercedes-Benz Superdome is harder than it looks. After a nostalgia trip, the trio drink beers and soak the ring with the beverage. Next! Daniel Bryan vs. Triple H (with Stephanie McMahon)It makes sense for this to be the first match of the night. After all, whoever wins is going to need a couple of hours to rest up in order to compete later on in the night. Now, Daniel Bryan had to make it to the main event. We pretty much knew that going in. His "Yes Movement" angle was not going to die during the first match of the show. The only thing of which we couldn't be sure is if Triple H would also be pulling double duty. He being the CEO, he could probably assure himself a spot in the main event if he so chooses. So, what happened? Bryan won clean. Yes, that's right. A running knee -- still a weak finisher in my opinion -- and a cover and Triple H lost. The match was a really good one. Lots of high-flying spots from Bryan, a great deal of working that injured shoulder by Triple H, and great in-ring work from both parties. Stephanie McMahon, Triple H's wife, screamed taunts and insults from outside the ring. Most surprisingly, I think, is that Triple H looked great from an in-ring perspective. He's now just a part-time wrestler, but he didn't look out of shape or breath, and this was a lengthy match. Other part-timers -- and I'm thinking Batista here, even if he's technically on a full-time contract -- took months to look in this good of shape. And Triple H is no spring chicken. After the match, Triple H and Stephanie attack Bryan and further injure his shoulder, because what else would happen? The odds have to be even more insurmountable than they already are, so that had to happen if Trips wasn't going to put himself in the main event as well. That doesn't properly conclude the story, however, which needs to happen ASAP if Bryan wants to have a strong title run -- assuming he wins it, of course. Remember, I picked Batista to win.
The Shield (Dean Ambrose, Seth Rollins and Roman Reigns) vs. Kane and The New Age Outlaws (Road Dogg and Billy Gunn)The Shield has been feuding with Kane and the New Age Outlaws for a few weeks now, but it's never really been something worth watching. There was little doubt how this match would play out, as there's little point promoting older stars over the young and talented Shield. As you'd expect, The Shield was victorious. The match was short and played out like the highlight reel of what an actual match between these groups might be. It was just great spot after great spot for a few minutes. It wasn't back-and-forth, though; The Shield dominated in what was essentially a squash match. If pro wrestling played by its own rules, they would have been counted out during one spot, when all three were in the ring at once, even though only one of them was the "legal" man. You have a five count, but the referee didn't even start counting. Whatever. It allowed for an amazing double-triple (triple-double?) powerbomb spot. Hopefully Kane can go back to something resembling the Kane of old now.
Following the match we get a "comedic" locker room segment with even more WWE Legends playing with toys. And then Ron Simmons shows up and does his Ron Simmons thing. André the Giant Memorial Battle Royal30 men. One ring. Over-the-top rules. Go! Much of this match played out like a lesser Royal Rumble. Starting everyone in the ring at once means the first few minutes are going to be incoherent. They were. After most of the eliminations, we were permitted a couple of really great spots. As Kofi Kingston often does, he astounded everyone but somehow surviving elimination by landing on the ring steps after being thrown over the rope. It looked very painful and was incredibly clever. Cesaro wound up the star of the match, both before the finale and prior to it. A Very European Uppercut to Rey Mysterio was great, and he actually wrestled a decent match. The finale came when Cesaro mimicked the big WrestleMania 3 spot by scoop slamming Big Show. But he did it to eliminate the 425-pound man. A scoop slam over the top rope. It was incredible, and a fitting tribute to André the Giant.
John Cena vs. Bray Wyatt (with Luke Harper and Erick Rowan)The Wyatt family comes out to live music. Their theme song is being performed in the Superdome, and it made the entrance that much better. The band killed it and it added to the show. Cena basically ran down to the ring, probably because the show was behind on running time. This is a story that's been building for many weeks now, and involves Bray Wyatt and his "family" attempting to make John Cena break his "good guy" routine. It's Batman vs. Joker in The Dark Knight, basically. The unconventional Wyatt doesn't care about getting the pinfall; he just wants to see Cena turn to the "dark side." The match itself was pretty unremarkable, particularly at the beginning. It started off slow, but by the time Cena had speared Luke Harper through the barricade(!), we knew we had a good match on our hands. The best spot came thanks to great camera work. Cena went for the Five-Knuckle Shuffle, but after bouncing off the ropes, Wyatt was in a crabwalk. Super creepy, and was a fantastic counter. Despite numerous opportunities, Cena doesn't give into his dark side and winds up scoring a clean win on Wyatt. Thanks to events during the match, The Wyatt family couldn't do anything to Cena after the match. The good guy wins because he didn't give into his dark side. Wyatt loses both by pinfall and because he couldn't make Cena "turn." Wyatt should have come off stronger, and this was a chance to do something new with Cena's character. Neither happened.
The Hall of Fame nominees showed up next. That's a big deal to some people, but if you watch the induction ceremony it really isn't. We already got the speeches and the waterworks. This was just to pay even more tribute, which I suppose is fine. I won't complain about it. The Undertaker vs. Brock Lesnar (with Paul Heyman)Regardless of anything else that happened on this card, this will be the match that cements WrestleMania XXX in history. The shock of all shocks occurred during this match. The Undertaker, previously undefeated in 21 other WrestleMania appearances, lost to Brock Lesnar. I still cannot believe it. Nobody in the crowd could believe it. The announcers were quiet for several minutes. Nobody saw this coming. Paul Heyman either didn't know the finish or is a truly fantastic actor. He looked more stunned than almost anyone. It is contrary to the way the match was booked. It goes against all conventional and conceivable logic. Lesnar works four matches a year, at most, and is already in the latter half of his career. Lesnar lost to HHH, who previously failed to beat The Undertaker. More importantly, it might have been the end of an era. The Undertaker is 49 years old and has been a constant presence in wrestling fans' lives for decades now. After the match, he was left on the mat for several minutes. The announcing team stood up and in unison gave him a standing ovation. The crowd starting cheering. It truly felt like the end. Even the Deadman isn't immortal, and that fact hits people hard. It doesn't help that the match itself wasn't spectacular. The Undertaker looked to be in great shape heading in, but after the first few minutes you could tell something wasn't right with him. A couple of semi-botched spots might have injured his neck or given him a concussion. He spent much of the match on his back, didn't attempt any high-flying moves -- not even that flying clothesline -- and struggled to do much at all. His match with CM Punk last year was a match of the year candidate. This wasn't even close. Your performance doesn't drop that much in a year. He was hurt. Lesnar is a stiff worker and always has been. He's also not a technically sound performer. His finisher never looks right, either. He was not the right person to work against The Undertaker. But that would have been The Phenom's choice. If the streak was going to end, it would have been his decision. I hope this isn't the end of an era, but it truly feels like it.
Vickie Guerrero Divas Championship InvitationalHow can anything top what happened just minutes before? It couldn't. That's what this match is for. It's a buffer period to give fans some time before the main event. It was a mess of a match to begin, as there were 14 Divas in the ring at once. For some reason, AJ and Tamina are still a team, even though Tamina had turned on AJ at one point -- and then came to her defense, because WWE has no idea what to do with the Divas who can actually wrestle. Anyway, some of the Divas get signature moves to pull off, there's an eight-person synchronized suplex and pin which was neat, the Bella twins faced off for a second, Aksana didn't injure anyone, and AJ Lee wound up winning, because there isn't a single person who deserves the title more than she does. I still hope she and Tamina will feud, or WWE brings back someone like Kharma. Oh, and the cast of Total Divas gets fired (except Natalya). One can dream.
Randy Orton vs. Batista vs. Daniel BryanIf it wasn't for the Undertaker/Lesnar match earlier in the match, this would be the talking point of the show. This was a great match, with each performer getting several fantastic spots. The best worker of the night was Randy Orton, even though he's not going to get the praise he deserves (and it doesn't help that, while he also came out to live music, the band's performance was laughable and now we all have to acknowledge that real people sing his theme song). During the signature moment, Batista and Orton did a combined Batista Bomb/RKO through the announcer table to Daniel Bryan. Orton landed on one of those monitors that they always clear out of the ring. He was in clear pain and had his back cut open. The focus, however, was on Bryan, who got put on a stretcher. Batista then worked Orton's back. You could tell that Orton worked the rest of the match in legitimate pain. The winner, however, was Daniel Bryan. If he hadn't won after the 'Taker shocker, there very easily could have been a riot. Batista was the one to take the loss, submitting to Bryan in the center of the ring. Triple H and Stephanie interfered in the match earlier on, but they wind up being an afterthought when all's said and done. After he wins, his shoulder is magically no longer hurt as he raises both arms to do his "Yes!" chant. Bryan's wife/child (I presume) come to the ring to celebrate. And that's how WrestleMania XXX ends, but it's not how it will be remembered.
WrestleMania is supposed to bring up emotions. Either the inspirational or the devastating. It is the most important date in the WWE, and it lived up to its name with its 30th installment. It will be talked about for years to come. And it provided a couple of real-life lessons. (1) No matter how much we think we know, we really don't know anything. (2) Even the most constant things in life can change in an instant. _________________________________________________________________________________So, that was WrestleMania XXX, everyone. What did you think? Are you still in shock? I am. As a side note, what do you think of the review? _________________________________________________________________________________If you wish to be notified whenever I post something new, please join this user group. If you wish to be notified whenever Sassafrass posts something new, please join this user group. For an archive of all my previous WWE reviews, please go here. Talk to me on the Twitter, @martertweet. Talk to Sassafrass on the Twitter, @SexySassyfrassy. | |
I still can't believe 'Taker lost to Lesnar. That he got to be the one to break the streak. I totally understand Taker was getting on in years and din't have much left in him, and that Lesnar was his choice, but still. I can see why Punk walked those months ago, getting upset that part-timers come in and get stuff handed to them while those who work their asses off (the WWE's under-use of Kofi is just criminal) rarely get those chances. I came in at the end, at the start of the final match so all I had to go on is what I saw on twitter. But that final match was pretty good. And mad props to Orton for continuing after getting slammed into that monitor. The thing I'm most sad about is that I missed the Cena/Wyatt match. Sounds like that one would have been my favorite. I mean damn, I REALLY wish I caught that match. | |
On the contrary side to this point, Batista didn't win the title. And when he came back it looked like a lock. WWE decided instead to go with the popular choice, not the man who hadn't wrestled in four years.
If you have the WWE Network (and can therefore re-watch to your heart's content) I would recommend checking it out. There are some ridiculous spots all over the card. | |