The rules of the almighty cake game:
1.If you have the cake, your winning. Think of capture the flag.

2.You can steal the cake ANYWAY YOU WANT. The more imaginative the better.
For example: I kick dumbfish1 into a handily situated cesspit. I have the cake!

3.Try to make it legible. Others might want to read the genius that I'm sure your post will be.

4.If I hear one person say the cake is a lie so help me!

I think I should start this off by saying, I have the cake.

bump

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i stab you with a pencil and take the cake from you.

i leave the cake on a table and look the other way.

i shoot you with a sleep dart from a blow gun

i put the cake in my safe deposit box

i use dynamite to get into the deposit box.

i put the cake on a shelf just out of reach.

i poke the shelf with a stick *cake falls on the ground*

i put the cake in barack obamas pants

i create a hostage situation, and receive the cake through negotiations with the president.

i place the cake in a tree.

i get my lolcats to get it for me and the lolcats get stuck

i send the cake on the next ship to the moon

I take a rocket ship up to the moon, grab the cake, and take it to Mars, and hide it deep within Pigfarts, guarded by the magical talking lion, Rumblerore.

i grab an ak47 and shoot the guardian,put on a gas mask,and take the cake to earth and bury it in the bahamas

i task an army of miners on the bahamas. they retrieve the cake for me, and all for a mere...
wow, they charge a lot more then i was expecting.

i place the cake in a hall of mirrors.

i use my trusty dp28 to shoot the mirrors and get the cake

i eat the cake whole!! *how ya gonna get it now fools!*

i cut you open and extract the cake using my surgical kit. i then throw up because i'm squeamish, and i just cut someone open.

i place the cake invitingly on the windowsill, and set my pet raven to guard it.

i cast heal onto myself and shoot the raven with my shotgun,bake it into the cake *om nom nom*

i put the cake in a time maching goi going to the battle between russia and the nazis

i steal your time machine and disguise myself as a communazi, an acceptable person on both sides, then go and retrieve the cake.
i break into your fridge through use of a circular saw to cut off the front door. i steal the new cake.

i place the cake under one of 2 boxes, then leave a sign there saying "pick one".

i take both boxes because im unfair!

i find a hawk and get it to fly away with the cake

i do extensive research on hawk migratory patterns, then work out precisely where the hawks nest is from that. i collect the cake, and a chocolate egg from the nest for some reason.

i place the cake in the anti-cooking device, reducing it to ingredients, which i put in my storage cupboard.

i remake the cake into an evil hitler cake!

i hide the nazi cake in the riechstag

i sneak in and redecorate it into a communist cake. they let me have it after that.

i hide a file in the cake, and give it to a prisoner.

i release the prisoner,and take the cake

i put the cake in the last place youd expect!

The last place that you'd expect turns out to be the first place I'd suspect.
I take it in my submarine to the deepest depths of the ocean.

The cake is hidden in this post. You'll understand what I mean later.

I am actually an omnipotent God and I kill everyone on the Earth and take the cake.

Also, I eat it. The end.

Using my Derren Brown-esq mind buggery I convince a small child to hide in your toilet and collect stool samples. I then analyze them for traces of cake DNA which I use to genetically engineer a new un-eatable cake.

I hide it inside your skull.

Dumbfish1:
Using my Derren Brown-esq mind buggery I convince a small child to hide in your toilet and collect stool samples. I then analyze them for traces of cake DNA which I use to genetically engineer a new un-eatable cake.

God doesn't poop or have DNA!

i extract it from my skull through use of a small hacksaw.
a shame you were so vague, took me a while to find which one in my collection it was.

i place the cake under a rock at the beach.

the rock is realy a crab and scuttles away

i take the cake to i hire chuck norris to guard the cake (whos dumb enough to mess with chuck norris?)

i call in a favour from raptor jesus who pwns chuck norris and then gives me the cake

i hide the cake in the warp!

i send master chief and the arbiter to get it

i throw the cake into the middle of ww100!

i gather together a band of elite fighters and we go on an epic adventure of gurrila warfare and self-discovery that will lead us to face the evil demons that have masterminded this war and destroy them and the cake which they guard, as the celebration begins i get dead drunk and forget my safety, the last demon rises up and uses his powers to send me back in time with the cake with his last breath.

I hide the cake under my hat!

i knock off your hat and take the cake

i take it to the prophet of truth and say it will light the halo (its not gonna be easy to get now)

I jump out from a handy tree a steal the cake from the prophet.

I hide the cake in an unpenetratable box. With a minotaur.

i kill the minotaur with my b.r and take the box containing the cake

i hide the cake in the museum of natural history

i break into it with my inter-dimensional technology, and retrieve the cake.
oh, i love museums.
i learn stuff while i look around for and find the cake.

i hide the cake in a cupboard that i then paint blue and throw into the ocean.