If above user's avatar showed up on your doorstep...

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Firearms!

Demand for him to take me to...

ARES!!

Demand to be taken to Aphrodite. Sounds like a much better time.

I would open the door and stare at you with indifference until you told me what you wanted, and then I would say no and close the door.

*Tilts head*

...Is it like, a bucket filled with skeleton bits?

That's what I'm going to assume it is.

*Kicks it*

Are you going to kill me? D:

I DON'T WANT TO GIVE MY MONEY AWAY TO A CHARITY FOR BLIND PEOPLE, NOW STOP CONTACTING ME, PLEASSE

T_T

*opens door*

Go away...

*slams door*

Shoot it. It looks like it'd make a pretty cool wallet.

*stare*
I think you may try to kill me so I'm going to have to call the police now...
you have been warned!

You're not Santa!

And you absolutely correct!

*steals your presents*

*kicks you over, takes presents and runs*

*chases*

CAT! STOP! COME BACK!

*keeps running* ARGH! SCARY DRAGON IS CHASING ME!!!

No, I don't want to buy your potatoes!

*slams door*

Why are there so many sentient cats in this neighborhood?

"'Zombie Goth Girl Scout cookies'? Hmmmm....that's not a brand I've ever heard of before."

I'm not a zombie. >.>

Well I did come back from the dead that one time.

*takes hat* I needed that!

Hat thief...

o_o

Scurry up the chimney and fly away on my reindeer pimp-mobile

*clean up* My, such a mess...

Give him drugged milk, so he forgets that he ever saw me

Here are for some laxatives, for that extra special surprise! (Just stay away from my house)

Give him a candy cane

Then GTFO of there

GET OFF MY ROOF!

*throws stones at Taco*

Dragon with your skin so bright, won't you guide my sleigh tonight?

Umm...should I call the police or something...
*goes inside, locks doors and shuts blinds*

Shall I get yo gif to work? (I don't know how, just being polite)

Emm, well thanks for the offer but... umm, I should do it myself cause I'd feel too in debt to you...IDK, you're too nice for the offer but...IDK... I should figure it myself so it's not trouble to you. Um, thanks anyway.....

No sexy :C

NOT TOO LAZY ANYMORE

You sir were ninja'd and didn't notice it. Go and be ashamed of yourself.

I'd treat his Ninja wounds.

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