What do you think the above users deepest darkest secrets are?

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Often works at a soup kitchen.

Because of the courts orders.

Is Jolly. By court order.

Has to chug gigabytes to survive.

Doesn't even torment people.

Is a snowman.

Once got brain freeze so bad that they sneezed a snowflake.

Doesn't drink!

Has never had a catnap.

Never had a drinknap

Actually wants Santa to take a crap down his chimney

Has 13 days of Christmas.

Never has Christmas!

Used a menorah to put on top of the Christmas tree

His parents where killed by a chimney sweep.

His parents raised him to hate Christmas!

Was raised by trial and error.

His mum took his spiked eggnog and gave it to the Christmas carolers

King of Portugal.

Is constantly tipsy.

Drinks nonalcoholic beer.

Is addicted to placebos.

Only pretends to like beer; he much prefers ginger ale

Doesn't know who Bruce Campbell is.

Went insane and started killing all her friends, because of a mysterious curse on the village

Doesn't have an actual boomstick.

Is really angry each time you see him smiling at you...

Hates everyone here unconsciously.

Loves everyone here unconsciously.

Loves everyone here unconditionally.

Never uses conditioner.

Doesn't know what conditioner is.

Gel's his hair.

Has no hair.

Uses a wig.

Has too much hair.

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