if you had the above avatar tied up in your basement

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I'd assume your identity and actually get the job done properly.

*has your old hat*

I'll take your hat! It's the source of your power... isn't it!?

What have you done!? *beats with Tire Iron and takes back hat* No one touches the hat!

Water-board him

MERICA DEMANDS SACRIFICE

Let me trim those silly feathers...

Sleep deprivation always makes the rebels sing!

Hold still, how do you like the tattoo I am giving you?
image

Overdose him on catnip!

Feed him to Lenin Cat.

image

Shave off his eyebrows

MERICAN REVENGE

Tell me where Lord Beric is!

Hook Zapdos up to a generator. Free electricity for life.

Run him over with a boat!

Not so endangered now, are ya!?

Once does not simply tie up the great 'MERICAN taco bird!

I can't tie up a bomb!

I love using them on MERICA'S enemies!

Oh, you and your drone strikes!
Now, don't try to break your ropes, or I'll be mad.

You better be grateful you're not at Guantanamo!

I have clipped your wings...and your freedom!

Where you're going, there is NO Dr.Pepper!

Have fun!

have him fight against the Reichsadler I keep down there.
let's see how MERICA deals with that.

I'd hang that multicoloured fellow from the ceiling and use him as a disco ball.

Have the Grim Reaper beat him up!

Alright, tell me where the bomb is.

Nice lightning resistant stuff.

I have captured an Animorph!

GIVE ME YOUR TECHNOLOGY!

Aren't basements your natural habitat?

Well I don't really have a basement but I guess the sewers will work fine, in any case probably torture him until he agrees to not ever cross me of the list or alternatively never release him, though that would make the issue of overpopulation quite extreme.
Mwahahaha immortality.

I'd have a good old chat.

Wow, been a while since I've been here, let's see what we've... got... Okay, how the hell did I tie up a game of Tetris?

My long lost brother!? *Hugs*

*yanks your tail*

*draws a mustache on him*

Crush his body with coins!

Lots and lots of coins...

I'm taking over this yacht.

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