Ruin-A-Wish Foundation.

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Granted.

I wish for more original wishes.

Granted wishes up until this point haven't been thought of yet so that last wish was hilarious.

I wish cricket was the worlds most popular sport.

Granted. It will be popular as soon as it gets mildly interesting!

I wish that I was a moderator for this site.

Granted, bt not only are you the most hated nodon the site, but you start with limited mod powers, you can only ;od in religion and politics. Have Fun.

I wish for better tv shows

Granted, but I hope you know Hungarian.

I wish for FREEDOM

Granted, but your sworn duty is to deprive others of their freedom as penance.

I wish for more conventions closer to my area!

Granted. There are now conventions every weekend, but they are all about the cultural importance of styrofoam.
I wish I had better music on my ipod.

Granted, but you now own an ipineapple. Which is silly because you can't listen to music on an ipineapple!

I wish that I can take and pass a bar exam already.

Granted. It should pass through your digestive track by tomorrow.

I wish to be forever clean!

Granted. In order to achieve this, you are tied down in a perfectly clean room and sprayed with hoses on full power from now until the end of time.

I wish for more brains.

Granted. But you only get more when someone know you dies.

I wish, I wish, I was a fish

Granted, but you have no gills.

I wish for Dr.Susse to grant this wish.

Granted, but he will only grant it to you when you're dying and too weak to change it to something useful.

I wish that I had gotten a 100% perfect score on that math test I bombed yesterday. :(

Granted. You will get it once you discover the TARDIS.

I wish for invisibility the ablility to fly at any speed I want

Granted, but you can only fly 3 inches off the ground.

I wish for the ability to scream incoherently in the streets.

Granted, but only when you only do it when nobody is around.

I wish for eternal life my own pet dragon!

Granted, but it is hungry, and you are the only meat nearby.

I wish my recurring nightmare would stop. Seriously, brain, it's been 3 months already!

Granted, but you only get to sleep for 3 hours at a time.

I wish for unlimited resources

Granted, you need none of it and it benefits no one...ever.

I wish for an extension to my current deadlines.

(Oh boy! It benefits me? :D)
Granted, but the world will end tomorrow.

I wish the world didn't end tomorrow.

Granted, but only for you. No one else is spared from the destruction of earth. You then die thirty seconds later due to lack of oxygen. :-P

I wish that I had a working Steam account at this point...

Granted, but Valve goes out of business and Origin takes over its servers, making you pay for everything.

I wish I had a good film to watch.

Granted due to error on metacritic Legally blonde 2 is now "Good". Enjoy.
I wish for more beer.

Granted. But you are now allergic to hops.

I wish to have my master's degree.

Granted, but it is believed you cheated to get it and you are sent to jail.

I wish I had more hours of sleep tonight.

Granted. But only if you fell asleep an hour ago and not a second more.

I wish people weren't so ignorant.

Granted, everyone now knows everything, everything you've ever done. They know, they KNOW and they are coming for you.

I wish for a bigger bed.

That bigger bed will just devour you in it's sheets, suffocating you to a painful death. Of course, if that's your thing...

I wish to tame Satan, Pokemon style!

Granted but using it in battle damns your soul and sets you on fire.

I wish for money without work.

Granted. Every time you need more money, someone close to you will die and you will inhereit all their money.

I wish I was be a pyromancer!

Granted. Have fun being the weakest zombie!

I wish that this site would stop with the sexism and relationship threads.

Granted. The site will now be shut down.

I wish my college wouldn't turn on the AC in the middle of winter...

Granted, they never turn it on in summer either, nor do they open windows.

I wish I had another kit kat chunky!

I wish more wishes were this easy to ruin.

Ah, the thing is, the moment you ruin a wish, it ceases to be a wish. TRY AGAIN.

I wish for a chocolate house! NOT THAT KIND THAT COMES OUT OF INTERESTING STREAM OF CONSCIOUSNESSES.

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