Ruin-A-Wish Foundation.

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Granted, it's rotten.

I wish for a Micro-Nation

Granted. It's so tiny that you accidentally crush the entire nation underfoot.

I wish to be on jury duty.

Granted, you are then tried for Jury tampering

I wish for a (puts on sunglasses) A CSI: Miami One-liner.

Granted but you get shot during the music intro to the show.

I wish for a fish.

Granted, here's a rod go get one.

I wish for a surprise guest.

Granted, it's Justin Beiber and you spend the whole bus trip heaaring him sing.

I wish for a V.A.T.S targeting system.

Granted. Comes with a free Super Mutant Brute to try it out on.

I wish for a ship. A proper ship.

Granted. Your rowboat has excellent manners.

I wish for a happy Thanksgiving! :D

Granted. Nana just had some LSD, she's happy though.

I wish for something to do.

Granted, image A bunch of killer ninjas then show up.

I wish to do stuff LIKE A BOSS.

Granted but you're going to be sued LIKE A BOSS for employee abuse.

I wish for more time.

Granted, you waste it.

I wish for a higher post count.

Granted. You start posting 10000 new posts every day, meaning you can't do other things anymore, so you die.

I wish for a kitten.

Granted, After I use it for a Schrodinger's Cat test

I wish for the damn RP thread's I'm on to fucking update so I wouldn't have to post on forum games -_-'

Granted. You get hit by a meteor and die, no hard feelings just astronomy!

I wish for a hug for forgiveness! :3

Granted, you are hugged by a porcupine.

I wish for a new MP3 player.

Granted, it becomes a giant robot that starts breaking your stuff.

I wish for Belgium to finally get a government so people will shut up about it.

Granted. The government is a dictatorship run by a crazy guy who declares war on the entire world and his main weapon of war is people being launched from catapults.

I wish ISU's didn't suck so hard.

Granted, I don't know what that is so you get attacked by a monkey.

I wish for a broken .44 magnum.

Granted. someone breaks a .44 magnum into your face, leaving you horribly disfigured and in constant pain.

I wish the previous poster knew that ISU stood for Independent study unit, and that they are just an excuse for teachers to give us a missive project worth about 20% of our final grade. There is also an exam that ends up being around 30% as well, so that means that 1/2 my grade is spent on 2 projects.

Why yes, I do want to vent.

Granted but they caused the problem because they though it was funny.

I wish life was on Easy mode.

granted, you fail at it anyways

I wish for Moar Gakka!

Granted but the Gakka is interrupted by mountains of dakka.

I wish to know all the references!

Granted, but knowing too much causes your head to explode.

I wish I made a wish.

Granted. That was a bit of a waste though.

I wish for a bacon mace.

Granted but its not cooked and it is a terrible weapon all together.

I wish for a lazer cannon

Fine but in a case of irony you accidentally shoot out your eyes with it.
I wish for some pringles

Granted. Every single one of them ends up being in the trash through various wacky hijinks that also result in you going to the hospital for a sextuple bypass.

I wish for more.

Granted you get MORE SLEEP!

I wish for another beer.

Granted, but you jacknife your bus.

I wish to skip Human Resources Class

Fine but on that day, they decided to make good on the name and completed a project that would use humans as a resource in a manner that indescribably painful and uncomfortable.
They decide to use those who skipped that class as the first test subjects

I wish my business plan was done so I don't have to worry bout it

Granted, But its done very badly

I wish for a cloth to wipe my greasy hands with (It's lunch over here)

Granted. It's such a used cloth that you get even more grease on your hands.

I wish for a list.

Granted, But its done very badly

Pfff, like that'll bother me(I seriously hope none of my group members frequent here)

Granted, it's a to do list for the end of the day. It's several feet long. You don't finish it, you exploding collar around your neck explodes

I wish for a wish

Granted, but someone ruins it for you.

I wish I could draw faster.

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