Ruin-A-Wish Foundation.

 Pages PREV 1 . . . 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 . . . 221 NEXT

Granted, you die in your sleep.

I wish for some Vodka.

Granted it's mixed with drain cleaner.

I wish for the worlds best moustache.

Granted, leading to years of "WHERE YO CURLY MUSTACHE AT?!" (MVC2 referance)

I wish for UMVC3

Granted. You get an Untimly Missed Visitor of Canada... 3 times.

I wish for more acronyms.

Granted. Now everything is an acronym for everything and those things are acronyms too. Acronymception, if you will. This unending confusion destroys your life.

I wish for a friend.

granted, you're now stuck with me, forever and ever and ever!

I wish for a dramatic sound-effect

Granted but it is played so loudly you lose all your hearing.

I wish for the wall beside me to be made out of a stronger material.

granted, it's now made of steel, but it's the fourth wall, and you have no choice but breaking it!

I wish to be able to lean on the seventh wall...

Granted it breaks and destroys the universe, nice going

I wish I could rule the world!!

Granted but because of a clerical error you have to measure the world with a ruler.

I wish for a never ending supply of socks.

Granted, they all emerge from the dryer ripped up and mismatched for all eternity.

I wish for plasmids.

I wish I knew how did it get burned...

Granted but the government kills you to keep you quiet.

I wish I was the dictator of Canada.

granted, but you overthrow yourself just so you wont be a burden...

I wish canada was considered a war-mongering nation (you know, just because it'd be weird)

Granted. They take over the world and place all non-Canadians into slave labour camps, gassing those who show the slightest bit of rebellious nature, and nuking any camps that have even a chance of falling to the prisoners.

I wish that secondary sources were never used in Essays.

Granted, you have to use Primary so you have to talk to old people all day.

I wish for a new pair on Runners.

Granted, you get a new pair of socks on your runners. Your runners are still full of holes.

I wish the yappy dog next door would spontaneously combust from all the barking it's doing.

Granted, he's in your house though...

I wish for a hidden missle launcher

Granted but you can't remember where it was hidden.

I wish that the morning always started with a musical style song and dance.

Granted, but you go deaf.

I wish to get wasted

Granted, you're crumpled up and thrown away before you ever get used.

I wish for a pirate ship and a lovely wench.

Granted. The ship sinks and the wench goes with it.

I wish for nice desk.

Granted it was on the ship.

I wish for a good day tomorrow.

Granted, someone else has a really good day, while your day remains lousy.

I wish for a competent butler.

Granted. Too competent. He is so good, that everything is always perfect, which, if that episode of the Twilight Zone is to be believed, bores you to death or something.

I wish to do something.

Granted here's a bunch of Mst3k Videos with the cometary on mute.

I wish for more stuff.

granted, it crushes you.

I wish to perform FOOS RO DAH!!

granted, you can only do it on an empty field, with nothing to get blown to hell

I wish to breath fire (and look groovy while doing it)

Granted, yours is a groovy, groovy death.. with no one to witness it.

I wish for a rave party in my pants.

Granted but the smell of vomit and spilled beer will last for months.

I wish for more pylons.

Granted, you get so many pylons that you can't drive anywhere anymore. And yes, I know what kind of pylons you meant but I chose to go another route.

I wish for an electronic butler in my laptop.

Granted, he tries to kill you in your sleep.

I wish for to watch two people in MORTAL KOMBAT!!!

Granted but they both are in comas already and it's just a race of which life support machine lasts the longer.

I wish that Curling was a more widely played sport.

Granted, It grows so big, half of the game is Ad's and the other half is more Ads


Granted. Sadly after a rather overenthusiastic nose pick your brain is a bit "Cooked"

I wish for no feeling in my left pinkie toe.

 Pages PREV 1 . . . 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 . . . 221 NEXT

Reply to Thread

Log in or Register to Comment
Have an account? Login below:
With Facebook:Login With Facebook
Not registered? To sign up for an account with The Escapist:
Register With Facebook
Register With Facebook
Register for a free account here