Who is the above Escapist... In real life?

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A giant chicken who won't come out and fight me.

He's actually a daring lion groomer who believes that no big cat is beyond the bounds of sexiness.

She's a Gorillaz fan... and she's a cool person.

He's a charmer. And a talented person.

They're Zombie Stalin. They just don't know it yet.

He's the Stig. Prove me wrong.

Ham is the man behind the Donald Duck mask at Disneyland.

A very bored Sean Connery, who has decided to hang around The Escapist.

A giant chicken who won't come out and fight me.

Anytime, anywhere.


OT: He burned down the Reichstag way back when. He has been influencing world politics for quite some time.

He invented Pop-Tarts, paper bags, and toothpaste.

He inspired Nixon to become a politician.

See, manipulating history!

The father of all mother of conspiracy theories.

There, there, sleep time now, you're room's this way...

He is actually death, but he isn't anywhere nea-


He is not really from Udrogoth, but from Omicron Persei 8.

He's actually the guardian of all that is sane.

They are Mysterio, who has retired after a final defeat at the hands of Spiderman.

Secretly Spider-Man, daydreaming about what it would be like to defeat Mysterio.

Secretly Batman, brooding over the fact that Gotham City is fictional.

Secretly Superman, sulking because he's not as awesome as Batman.

Secretly Aquaman, hating everyone and everything.

My secretive work colleague.

A dead skunk brought back to life by Herbert West in an early experiment.

He's an inspiration to young children everywhere.

They're actually the guitarist for the Gorillaz...<.<

Is the (well a) shoggoth, disguised as a little girl, keeper of all that is surreal

Is actually someone who goes out in the snow to reap crops. Crops that don't actually exist.

He's some strange entity that requires no food, water, or oxygen.

He covers himself in a white sheet when he goes outside because he thinks it makes him invisible.

Dango is a sentient Starfish on a scouting mission. Soon the invasion will begin...

A self-described and self-prescribed professional lazy-ass from Canada.

The air-force mascot... who is impossible to dress...

Jean-Paule Jacket-On.

a guy who like the rocky horror picture show who nurtures wounded nails back to health in his spare time and names them all Jack the third

The guy Dusty's talking about in Son of a Preacher Man.

Secretly a guy who is currently eating unhealthy food.

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