The Improvement Game.

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With shower sex.

How do you improve lederhosen?

With beer and Fräuleins.

How do you improve cider?

Add apples to the cider.
How do you improve pickles?

Through reverse fermentation, turning them back into cucumbers.

How do you improve Mortal Kombat?

Turn it into MMORPG. It's not like there's any competition in the MMO genre. <.<

How do you improve time travel?

Make it so you don't receive nearly as severe of mutations as my current device gives.
Seriously, I'm starting to get worried...

How do you improve Metacritic?

Get the idea into everyone's head that it is not the basis for.. anything.

How do you improve teacakes?

Duh, with Tea.

How do you improve Scones?

Explain what they really are.

How do you improve wall art?

Make it 3Dish and realistic.

How do you improve voiceovers?

With the proper gear.

How do you improve Catgirls?

With some doggirls to chase them down the street. Amidoinitrite?

How do you improve abseiling?

With heavy metal.

How do you improve eyelids?

More hair on your eyes!

How do you improve a comfy bed?

Breakfast in bed.

How do you improve forum games?

By making it so you win real cash!

How do you improve money?

By giving it all to me.

How do you improve economics?

By enlisting people who actually know what they're doing.

How do you improve this thread?

With moar posts!

How do you improve kittens?

With moar kittens and a ball of string!

How do you improve a long weekend of good weather?

With barbeques!

How do you improve puppies?

With barbeques!

How do you improve revision?

By actually revising.

How do you improve perfection?

By perfecting it.

How do you improve fire?

By adding petrol.

How do you improve pens?

Replace the ink with blood.

How do you improve narwhals?

ALL the colours!

EDIT: Narwhals can only be improved via a machine gun on their face rather than a horn.

How do you improve recycling?

Recycle corpses

How do you improve blood?

With nanomachones.

How do you improve midi-chlorians?

By removing them entirely.

How do you improve death?

With a sharper scythe.

How do you improve Digimon?

With magnets.

How do you improve prescription painkillers?

Remove the prescription part and lol at the overdosing noobs!

How do you improve bowties?

Make them neon orange.

How do you improve power poles?

With MOAR POWER!!!!11!!

How do you improve Sunny D?

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