If you woke up in bed with the person in the above image...

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This might take some explaining.

I don't know what sick, twisted and messed up thing that could be but lay it on me sugar!

No, I will not screw you for a free Vita. I am not that desperate.

Judging by the look you're giving me last night was not legal.

...You weren't wearing that last night were you?

Da fuq am I looking at? And why is my bed all flat looking?

Surprisingly, not the most terrifying thing this thread has ever given me.

Ok I don't know what is going on but is that my blood you're drinking and why are we chained together?

Why are you thinking of apples o.o

Why you're looking para-normally beautiful.

Well hello there Ms. Fanservice!

Forever alone. :(

Nice scythe, baby.

Look out, she's got Razzle-Dazzle!
*hopes someone else gets the reference*

I'm going to go stick my head under a cold shower until the drugs get out of my system, k?

I'd be ok with this if there wasn't a giant, possibly sentient body of armor in my room.

I'd be more than fine with this development.

Hey! This crab is a Headsprouter! *ba dum tssh*

Hello.......I ate your sandvich.

Look kid, I allowed you to sleep on my bed because you have nightmares, but bringing your pizza bed with you is TOO MUCH.

...I'm strangely okay with this.

You don't have to wear that mask pretty lady.
You pretty!

I'd take the bike...but I don't want the guy in the Marines to attack me. One thing in life you never do, piss of a Marine.

Would you mind not giving me plague and killing the whole party?

You can stay here. ^.^

I love your games, but I don't love you THAT way.

Your outfit doesn't look like it cost $5! Congratulations!

Well hello there. Want some breakfast?

I am okay with this.

*yawn* Huh?

Oh, you have a nice day at school then.

Wait... what were you doing in my bed... OH GOD.

No wonder I was so itchy...

...not that I'm complaining.

*runs out of the house screaming*

I thought you had a thing for your cousin.

Yep. The only person I wanted to bone from Eva.

Are you wearing a pantyhose over 90% of your body...? I'll infer from that as to what that book is about.

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