Mall Fight - Back To Basics (Open)

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Unable to see where I'm actually going, I tumble into the fountain, and sink to the bottom. Unfortulently, because the washing machine is air tight, suffer a painful death from lack of oxygen.

"OH GAWD! OH LAWD! OH LAWD, SAAAVE ME, SAVE ME GAWD!" (Me)

I tackle Eric, and we both get crushed by Averant's washing machine.

I respawn in a another pet store, and look at the hermit crabs with the painted shells. I then look up and see the pythons... "Ooooo..."

While Zep is distracted by the snakes, the crabs swarm and kill him. I respawn in a Kwik-E mart.

I stand outside the pet store, watching Zeph be killed. "It looks like hes *Puts on sunglasses* got crabs." I say, before said crabs burst throught the front window of the shop and kill me.

I laugh at Knife's misfortune.

I laugh at Eric laughing at my misforture. Then I slap him around with a TV antenna.

I spawn in a Staples, and begin sellotaping pens and pencils and an Easy Button to my chest.
Then I run out, and jump onto Knife, aiming to ram the writing utensils into him so deeply the Easy Button is pressed.
"I HOPE SOMEONE RATES THE DIFFICULTY OF THIS KILL!" I yell, foreshadowing the possible Easy Button-pressing.

I respawn in the pet store again and open all the hamster cages. "GO EVIL HAMSTERS!! DESTROY THE OTHER MALL FIGHTERS!!"

The hamsters form a large mob of cuteness as they head towards Twibly and Knife.

In the air, I stare at the horde of hamsters and abort my leap by flailing wildly until I fall.
"Come at me... brodents." I say dramatically, then rush the mob.

The hamsters shout in a high pitch squeak as they continue their charge towards Twibly. They all leap at Twibly, teeth baring.

I place my hands on the sellotape and push, clicking all the pens and impaling the leaping hamsters, then I plug my ears with two spare pens.
"That was- that was- that w- that was easy." the Easy Button says.

OoC: Lol Nice!

I run into the hallway, and glue a gold coin to the ground. I then run up to the next floor and grab a plant pot ready to drop it onto anyone who goes for the gold coin.

I see a gold coin and Youth Roll at it, and try to grab it.
I stab my legs a bit on the pens.

I throw the pot at Twibly, then book it to get to another location.

The pot smashes my back, and I somehow impale myself on the pens.
"That was easy."

I spawn in a gardening shop and arm myself with dual trowels.
"I'm going to get rid of the dirt in this Mall..." I say to a potted plant, then run away.

OoC: The 'That was easy' button is awesome.

I run to the Vacuums-R-Us store, and get a super powered vacuum. I then stand on it, and turn it on. It rockets out of the store. "I am going to make a clean get-away!"

I run into the fireworks store, and for no particular reason, light the place on fire.
I then watch the colours.
image

I hear Zeph's yell and grab tool-belts, a rake, a hoe, overalls, work boots and a flower as I leave.
Now fully equipped, I step outside.

I sneak up behind Trilby, and upend a bucket of paint over his head.

Then I hear the explosions and see the rainbow. I feel a strange compulsion to Taste The Rainbow.
So I run at Knife's location, hoe raised, screaming like a rabid Mel Gibson In Braveheart.
"I DIDNAE KEN IT WIS HOGMANAY!" I say.

Then he reveals himself through the cunning application of paint, making me look like Mel Gibson in Braveheart. I swipe the hoe at his face.

I backpeddle, throwing more paint at Trilby in an attempt to blind him.

I blink and wipe the paint away from my eyes. "It's on... like my computer. I... I seriously left it running. That's dangerous." I say to distract Knife, then attack with a throwing trowel aimed at his face.

The trowel his me in the face, and I fall backwards over the railing and into the ball pool that was totally there the entire time.

I switch out my Hoe-micide for my Life-Raker (Gardening is working out really well in the 'Slay on Words' department...) and jump over the railing into the ball-pit and lance Knife, then take back my throwing trowel.

As Trilby removes the lance, and I am blnded by Bryghtside, I dive, deep into the sea of balls.
OOC:Wow, that sound really dirty now that I think about it.

I slide under the balls and ball-swim away.

@Knife Yes. Yes it did. Very much so.

I keep swimming downwards. I swim for so long infact, that I emerge in the Chinese Mall.

I emerge for air and climb out. "Now... I wonder where he got that shirt... Meh, I'll go find people to kill. I'm surprised he seems to be alive..." I muse, then chase the rhinoceros.

I charge in with the mighty vacuum cleaner and start sucking up all the balls in the ball pool.

I point Life-Raker at Zeph. "I CHALLENGE YOU TO A DUEL! Unorthodox weapons at now." I say.

"Ok just one second, almost got all the balls for the pool!" I say as I watch the pool drain. "Ok! I choose this high powered vacuum cleaner!"

OoC: It's battery operated, has hyper suck and blow features and I'm standing on it.

"I choose... THE LIFE-RAKER!" I declare declaratively, raising the weapon.
Coincidentally, a yellow and red starburst screen appears on the very large TV behind me.


I rush at Zeph and do a sweet-ass ninja-style leaping thrust...
Then I stab the rake at Zeph.
Hah, sexual humour...

As Twibly leaps at me, I switch the vacuum from suck to blow. Balls from the ball pit launch at Twibly, hitting him in the face.

OoC: Two can play at that game... =P

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