Create a life story for the user above you

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Leet x1337, is the online identity for L.1. K3wL J, a little known hip-hop-polka artist. Little does he know that the powers that be have deemed his unique fusion of Hip-Hop and Polka to be the next great genre of music, if only he were to look in his mail box for the contract... rather than spending all day on the intranetz

leet_x1337:
Paya Chin was a perfectly ordinary man before he decided he wanted to be a troll. He decided to start with the secondary "If you woke up in bed" thread, but his chosen method of trolling (refusal to learn from mistakes) is so incredibly obvious that nobody pays him any mind any more. Despite this, he has resolved to keep on fighting, through the thunder and the lightning...

(He is also Megadeth's number one fan.)

lies... they are no ****** in escapists!!! or megadeth fans.
===

it was a dark and stormy nite... unlike every other dark nite which was just fabulous!!!

overpies heard footsteps, but they seemed rather squishy for a delicate and massive girl like his ex, whose tread was mushy. He turned around and found leet_XL_leak staring at him.

"What are you doing here?" leet_XL_leak said quickly. "I thought you said you didn't want to see me again."

overpies had said that, but now he was beginning to wish he hadn't acted so soap-opera-ish. "My ex asked to meet me here." As he gazed at leet_XL_leak, his nostril began to throb with much mucus.

"Oh," leet_XL_leak said, like a bat outta hell. "I'll just go then."

"Wait," overpies said and caught leet_XL_leak by her/his armpit. "I was wrong. I still love you. Can you ever forgive me?"

"Yes," leet_XL_leak said, smiling. They wrapped their arms around each other and kissed, like a nya nya catsu exploding unto the neverending event horizon.

From behind some balls, the "ex" watched with an witching light in her militant lesbian eyes. She took a list out of her pocket, and checked off "overpies SLASH leet_XL_leak". AND THAT IS ALL.

Paya Chin

A spy hailing from Moscow, Russia. He has aided in the espionage of thirteen countries and carried out the assassinations of three dictators in the last three years.

Claiming to be from Sierra Leone, he posts on the Escapist forums to maintain his cover as an illiterate thread hopper. Crafty bastard.

Last sited in the Carribean with the once-thought-dead-now-MoCap actress Princess Diane.

lies. i don't remember being in sierra leone. it wasn't me...
---
"holy buffalo!?!!" FDLinc cried.

He fled promptly upstairs, but the thing gave chase with lightning speed. HE WAS TRAPPED.

READY!!!
FIGHT!!!!!

First He tried to chop it with a sharp butcher's knife from the kitchen, then shot it with some paedo's shot gun that hangs over the fireplace. It just kept coming. He thought he was dead for sure, when suddenly a strange figure crashed through the window and leapt in front! He was tall and stenchy, with fierce yucky eyes and dropping shoulders. He was dressed entirely in black, except for his purple paedogeneral's panties.

"YAAABER DABBBA DOOO!" the figure cried, and quick as a fox he jumped in and stunned the ooze creature with a powerful RIDER KICK!!!!!

Without pause he scooped the thing down stairs and tied it shut with a long shitrope.

"How did you do that?!" He gasped.

"Their only weakness is their bum," the figure replied. "One good kick and the things are helpless."

"But how do you find it?" he asked, staring at the shapeless mass.

"That is easy," said the stranger. "It is right next to their shoulder."

He thanked the lone stranger for saving him and asked a name. "I am ChowCheebie, and I have been hunting the ooze creatures all my life. Join me in my quest and we will make the world safe from their stinking evil!"

They kissed amd got married.

image

it is you who is the lies....
---

No longer content with his life in the Carribean, Paya decided it was time to quit his job and pursue his dreams of becoming a drag queen!

He can now be found in the high alps dressing in coloured silks and lacy ribbons entertaining the sherpas and tibetan monks with his famous "I'm a little princess and now I'm a snail" dance, it is a complicated set of manouvers that includes the dancer dislocating his spine and turning 38,000 degrees clockwise, and back again.

his current whereabouts are now unknown.

FDLinc a.k.a Fredrick Dinkleberg Lincoln was the top killer in the Paranoia Killer Agency, but for the most part he was all alone either killing the unknown or reading Hellsing (see profile pic). The only one who tried to get to know him was his intern named "Blondie". Unfortunately, as Blondie opened the door of the P.K.A Headquarters one faithful day, all the stood between her and Fredrick was disembodied corpses of the former P.K.A agents. As she gazed into his eyes, she knew a bomb went off... a bomb that was located... in Fredrick's heart.

Hiphop... i.e. Patient 4479, spent the first seven years of her life on a mad killing spree as she simply could not say no to the adorable voices in her head. She spent the rest of her life in a mental institution. She died of a heart attack brought on by a medication overdose. Investigations into her demise are... non-existent.

TheDoctor455 aka John Doe. Subject was convinced that he was a "Timelord" from the planet "Gallifrey". Subjects demise was cause by him trying to prove this by stopping "one of two hearts" Verdict: suicide.

Kailus13, also known as Kyle Lussteen spent most of his comparibly short life believing himself to be a pony. Although no one really knows why he would be so fascinated with small horses, it would ultimately prove to be his downfall as one day while trying to smell a pony in an attempt, as our psychology experts say, to "socialise" with it, he was kicked in the head and hit a rock, and died from major wounds to the head along with blood loss.

Neuromancer. He was born to live, not to work. And lived he did.

thesilentman, tried to have a staring contest with the Slender Man. One guess who won.

TheDoctor455 prowls the wild west, never staying in any place long. He leaves his glass as empty as his soul.

kailus13's hypocrisy was their downfall when they tried to pour their soul into my glass. Didn't go well. As you can imagine.

TheDoctor455 developed quite the reputation in the underworld for being a highly successful assassin. Many investigators and criminologists believed that leaving the same card at the scene of every assassination would be a surefire way to ensure his downfall.. but they were mistaken. He was quick to pick up on this and mock them about it, often signing his calling cards with "Love and kisses, The Doctor xoxo"

Ahri. The one and only- *shot*.

thesilentman has never talked, or made any sounds. Doctors are still baffled about how his internal organs came to be muted.

Kailus has been murdered by shadows. No one knows who...

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