Ask Commander Shepard!

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OlasDAlmighty:
Do you like the nose I gave you? I'm starting to think I made it a little too big.

I'm sorry...but you really arnt much of a plastic surgeon..I got that fixed

This is for all Shepards:

It's summer at the local beach, what do you do to unwind after a long mission?

dalek sec:
This is for all Shepards:

It's summer at the local beach, what do you do to unwind after a long mission?

I would probably leave the beach and go somwhere internesting...like the local vid-plex

Renegade Shepard:
Also, I made a group for us, guys.

http://www.escapistmagazine.com/groups/view/Fictional-Characters-Crew

I swear if you weren't in a some sort of fiction and you try joining the group, I will punch you in the gut until you cough up blood.

I'd like you to "revise" the rule about throwing apples at me....

dalek sec:
This is for all Shepards:

It's summer at the local beach, what do you do to unwind after a long mission?

One of them apparently likes to get shot down by nearly every female in sight

Of course, that may only happen when I'm around, they just can't get enough of me.

Paragon Shepard:

dalek sec:
This is for all Shepards:

It's summer at the local beach, what do you do to unwind after a long mission?

I would probably leave the beach and go somwhere internesting...like the local vid-plex

Ok, you're awesome! :D

That's what I use to do at the beach, go the local arcade and have a hot dog afterwards.

Paragon Shepard:

Renegade Shepard:
Update on my big fan.

Renegade Shepard:

1. Maybe you should've taken my advice and coped with the situation.

2. Just because you think something is true doesn't mean it's a fact.

3. The administration at worst would probably wag their finger at me if they even think this is worth giving a damn.

4. Stop throwing a temper tantrum at the smallest of things, kid.

Really, who hasn't heard of the third games ending yet? If it sucks then why is it bad that I hinted towards the fact that everyone dies as a surprise ending.

huh?..who is this guy?

does he work for cerberus?

Liara says no, just some kid with an inflated ego. It might be best to simply move on.

dalek sec:
This is for all Shepards:

It's summer at the local beach, what do you do to unwind after a long mission?

A cool drink, a friend, maybe a girl, and some time to relax.

God knows I need it.

Paragon Shepard:

Renegade Shepard:
Update on my big fan.

Renegade Shepard:

1. Maybe you should've taken my advice and coped with the situation.

2. Just because you think something is true doesn't mean it's a fact.

3. The administration at worst would probably wag their finger at me if they even think this is worth giving a damn.

4. Stop throwing a temper tantrum at the smallest of things, kid.

Really, who hasn't heard of the third games ending yet? If it sucks then why is it bad that I hinted towards the fact that everyone dies as a surprise ending.

huh?..who is this guy?

does he work for cerberus?

Nah, just some overly-emotional kid.

Can't stand kids.

Paragon Shepard:

Renegade Shepard:
Also, I made a group for us, guys.

http://www.escapistmagazine.com/groups/view/Fictional-Characters-Crew

I swear if you weren't in a some sort of fiction and you try joining the group, I will punch you in the gut until you cough up blood.

I'd like you to "revise" the rule about throwing apples at me....

I'm sorry, I can't hear you over the sound of apples pelting you continuously!

G Vakarian:

dalek sec:
This is for all Shepards:

It's summer at the local beach, what do you do to unwind after a long mission?

One of them apparently likes to get shot down by nearly every female in sight

Of course, that may only happen when I'm around, they just can't get enough of me.

Hey, Parashep just needs to take lessons from one of us, don't hold it against her that she's a newbie.

Renegade Shepard:

Nah, just some overly-emotional kid.

Can't stand kids.

*shudder* no....me neither

.

Hey, Parashep just needs to take lessons from one of us, don't hold it against her that she's a newbie.

excuse me?

I have had sex before thank you very much....that one time

I don't have time for that anyway, I'm too busy being space Jesus

and I'll have you know even the Krogan want me

Renegade Shepard:
snip

Paragon Shepard:
snip

G Vakarian:
snip

Have any of you thought of using the wonderous cardboard box to your advantage?

There was this guy i knew once, he was mad on the things. The things he told me you could do with a box! :D

To both Shepards, can you explain how you are from different countries? Or are Finland and Canada the same country in the future? If it is, is it called Canland or Finada?

This question is to Renengade Shepard....of course.

Im a sad lonely man, do you have any tips for getting women(Or aliens with genders beyond our simple human understanding) so I can be less sad and lonely?

Renegade Shepard:

G Vakarian:

dalek sec:
This is for all Shepards:

It's summer at the local beach, what do you do to unwind after a long mission?

One of them apparently likes to get shot down by nearly every female in sight

Of course, that may only happen when I'm around, they just can't get enough of me.

Hey, Parashep just needs to take lessons from one of us, don't hold it against her that she's a newbie.

Sorry for laughing at you on our last shore leave.

The sight of my sister turning you down with her knee was just too much.

VeryOddGamer:
To both Shepards, can you explain how you are from different countries? Or are Finland and Canada the same country in the future? If it is, is it called Canland or Finada?

The way Mordin explained it to me, my Shepard, Renegade, and Ugg are from parallel modes of existence, where slight changes to and around Shepard's life radically change his/her nature and origin.

He then went on to explain how they actually got together, but got off tangent somewhere and started singing something about coconuts while working on a new project.

daveman247:

Renegade Shepard:
snip

Paragon Shepard:
snip

G Vakarian:
snip

Have any of you thought of using the wonderous cardboard box to your advantage?

There was this guy i knew once, he was mad on the things. The things he told me you could do with a box! :D

Sounds interesting, let me do a bit of research on the extranet.

...seriously? We're shot at multiple times a day with munitions that can rip holes in titanium plate, where it doesn't vaporize the plate entirely, and you want us to place our faith in a simple otherwise featureless box made from soft reprocessed plant matter?

Tear it up, and you might be able to use it as improvised chaff or something similar, but we already have better options available along those lines.

Renegade Shepard:
*snip*

What is the best way to cut my balls off and sell them to a Krogan?

Paragon Shepard:
*snip*

How do you deal with the loss of your pet fish over and over and over again?

G Vakarian:
*snip*

What's your sniper rifle of choice? Any favorites?

Z of the Na'vi:

G Vakarian:
*snip*

What's your sniper rifle of choice? Any favorites?

Depends on what I'm heading into.

I prefer engaging multiple lightly armored targets with the weapon you know as the M-13 Raptor, although I'm more partial to the original Turian version rather than Cerberus's imitation. In all fairness however, it would be more accurate to describe it as a precision assault rifle with a scope than a true sniper.

Heavier opponents often require something with a bit more punch, for that, it is very tough to beat my overall favorite, the Black Widow. Nothing like taking down a group of Centurions with a single thermal clip. The Mantis is nice as well, but is not quite in the same league, and often requires staying out of cover for longer periods to finish a target off, which can prove fatal.

The Viper is an excellent compromise. It tends to be my weapon of choice when facing mixed units, or when I simply don't know what we are up against, which is all too often.

I should also mention the Geth made Javelin, the charge cycle for each shot can take some getting used to, but the high damage output and unusually effective target acquisition system make it nearly ideal for eliminating hidden enemies in one hit, regardless of cover, obscuring smoke, and/or active camouflage. I will be very interested to find out what else we can do with the thing once we finish reverse engineering it.

VeryOddGamer:
To both Shepards, can you explain how you are from different countries? Or are Finland and Canada the same country in the future? If it is, is it called Canland or Finada?

I originally came from Finland...I'm pretty sure

at least I think it was finland....Renshep is lying, but he obviously loves canada for some reason

Fieldy409:
This question is to Renengade Shepard....of course.

Im a sad lonely man, do you have any tips for getting women(Or aliens with genders beyond our simple human understanding) so I can be less sad and lonely?

1. stop blaming everyone else for your problems

2. stop asking jerks for advice

3. grow some confidence...meabye join the Alliance if youre looking for a fresh start

daveman247:

Have any of you thought of using the wonderous cardboard box to your advantage?

There was this guy i knew once, he was mad on the things. The things he told me you could do with a box! :D

cardboard is an outdated material that lacks durability and requires alot of rescources to make

hence why its been replaced with supiror plastic crates which can also stop bullets

the only thing I can think of to use carboard for would be bedding for my space hamster

Z of the Na'vi:

How do you deal with the loss of your pet fish over and over and over again?

?

I buy more

Shepard, what is best in life? Is it to crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and hear the lamentation of their women or is it different in your time?

G Vakarian:
]The way Mordin explained it to me, my Shepard, Renegade, and Ugg are from parallel modes of existence, where slight changes to and around Shepard's life radically change his/her nature and origin.

He then went on to explain how they actually got together, but got off tangent somewhere and started singing something about coconuts while working on a new project.

OR the other theory is we are in fact all siblings and there was some plot involving cerberus replacing me with Renegade shepard...and Ugg....we don't talk about Ugg

to be honest though none of us are really sure eather way

TheOneBearded:
Shepard, what is best in life? Is it to crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and hear the lamentation of their women or is it different in your time?

we've already have this question

and I already answerd: Bananabread

G Vakarian:
Snip

I don't know why, but I can't read your posts without having Garrus' voice read it in my head - mannerisms and all.

Furthermore, Tali, really? You could have any piece of ass in the entire ship, no the entire universe, yet you go for the one person who lives in a suit for the whole game. Have you even seen her face? She could look like the Predator or have a penis that grows on her face. Have you thought this through?

Also, why didn't you become a Spectre? I'd rather have you watching my back as a Spectre than Ashley or Alenko - the dumbest choices to be one.

Paragon Shepard:

TheOneBearded:
Shepard, what is best in life? Is it to crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and hear the lamentation of their women or is it different in your time?

we've already have this question

and I already answerd: Bananabread

With nuts? Without nuts? Throw me a bone, will ya. What are your thoughts on pound bread?

Hey Shepard, how come after Sovereign, the Collectors and the Reaper invasion of Earth the Council STILL doesn't listen to you? Are they really that stupid?

TheOneBearded:

G Vakarian:
Snip

I don't know why, but I can't read your posts without having Garrus' voice read it in my head - mannerisms and all.

Furthermore, Tali, really? You could have any piece of ass in the entire ship, no the entire universe, yet you go for the one person who lives in a suit for the whole game. Have you even seen her face? She could look like the Predator or have a penis that grows on her face. Have you thought this through?

Also, why didn't you become a Spectre? I'd rather have you watching my back as a Spectre than Ashley or Alenko - the dumbest choices to be one.

What's wrong with Tali?

She's extremely intelligent and playful, with an excellent sense of humor. Furthermore, we've shed blood together, our own and that of others.

I've seen what Quarians look like without their suits before, they can and do take them off in sufficiently sterilized clean rooms. They look quite aesthetically pleasing, and Tali is particularly beautiful to me. whether or not humans would think the same... *shrugs* Turians physically have more in common with your birds or apex predatory dinosaurs than humans. Of course, Renegade doesn't seem to mind, but all things considered, that might not be the best standard to go by.

Her specie's immune problems are the only thing that gives me pause. My species is more biochemically compatible with her's than any other, but that isn't quite enough to bypass the issue. I care for her a great deal, and risking her health is the last thing I want to do.

As for becoming a SpecTRe, do you mean before or after meeting the commander? The first time, my father, a C-sec man through and through, blocked my candidacy.

Afterwards, the events following Sovereign's attack on the citadel left me extremely frustrated. I found the idea of continuing to work for the same people that turned their back on Shepard, to the point of undermining his credibility, almost nauseating. Striking out on my own seemed much preferable. I could do the same job with or without counsel approval, all they had to offer me was a bit of additional resources in exchange for oversight I no longer wanted.

Paragon Shepard:

cardboard is an outdated material that lacks durability and requires alot of rescources to make

hence why its been replaced with supiror plastic crates which can also stop bullets

the only thing I can think of to use carboard for would be bedding for my space hamster

... Plastic still works! :P

So i guess you havn't considered hiding in it for example? It would fool people for sure, just don't move while they are looking!

erttheking:
Hey Shepard, how come after Sovereign, the Collectors and the Reaper invasion of Earth the Council STILL doesn't listen to you? Are they really that stupid?

The council members, all of them, are quite capable and intelligent. Their decisions were not admirable, and they were not the correct decisions for reasons that are now obvious to all, but they were made first out of ignorance, and then fear, not stupidity.

Shepard's claim did sound just a bit on the crazy side to begin with to anyone not directly involved. After all, the only initial proof he had to show for it was a set of incoherent visions and the testimony of people that had a lot to gain by lying about something like the reapers.

After Sovereign's attack, as I mentioned before, it was mainly a matter of fear. None like to hear that their way of life is about to abruptly and violently end. Some people respond to such a threat by stepping up and doing whatever they think is necessary to prevent it. Others are more inclined to hope the threat isn't real, move on as if nothing is wrong, and ignore evidence to the contrary, right up to and sometimes beyond the point of no return. Unfortunately, the council members proved to be in the latter category, and the fact that we still had no irrefutable evidence to show did not help.

daveman247:

Paragon Shepard:

cardboard is an outdated material that lacks durability and requires alot of rescources to make

hence why its been replaced with supiror plastic crates which can also stop bullets

the only thing I can think of to use carboard for would be bedding for my space hamster

... Plastic still works! :P

So i guess you havn't considered hiding in it for example? It would fool people for sure, just don't move while they are looking!

Few of our enemies rely on sight alone. Most decently equipped mercs for example have infrared scanners, among other tools that would make hiding in such a box rather counterproductive.

Besides, even a dumb Loki mech is probably going to figure out that something is a little off about a box that moves around, whether or not it only occurs out of visual scanning range.

Paragon Shepard:

daveman247:

Have any of you thought of using the wonderous cardboard box to your advantage?

There was this guy i knew once, he was mad on the things. The things he told me you could do with a box! :D

cardboard is an outdated material that lacks durability and requires alot of rescources to make

hence why its been replaced with supiror plastic crates which can also stop bullets

the only thing I can think of to use carboard for would be bedding for my space hamster

You dare insult the box? Witness it's glory!

Al-Bundy-da-G:

You dare insult the box? Witness it's glory!

What the hell. This is ridiculous. Otacon call my lawyer, that tactic is copyrighted.

G Vakarian:
snip

Well... those mercs aren't exactly the most well configured omni-tool in the space-shed are they? Always getting their stuff hacked and being killed XD

TheOneBearded:

G Vakarian:
Snip

I don't know why, but I can't read your posts without having Garrus' voice read it in my head - mannerisms and all..

I know right? I'm doing that too! Yet when I read stuff from the Shepards I don't read it in the voice of Jennifer Hale or the one that did the guy voice...

Solid Snake:

Al-Bundy-da-G:

You dare insult the box? Witness it's glory!

What the hell. This is ridiculous. Otacon call my lawyer, that tactic is copyrighted.

No, we don't need fucking novelty accounts here, this isn't reddit. Wise up, seriously.

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