Have I done the right thing?
Yes
90% (18)
90% (18)
No
10% (2)
10% (2)
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Poll: Have I done the right thing?

I've known this girl for about 4 years.

We met through work. She works in a different department to me and how we met was she had an awkward customer and called my dept for advice and got me. So to help her out I took over the call to the customer for her. Just a nice gesture to help out a co-worker.

So we email a few times, friend each other on facebook etc. But the majority of our conversations tend to be her troubles with work or boyfriends etc etc and me offering advice. Her choice in men tends to be complete arseholes. 2 of them who she was sleeping with, at different times, had girlfriends who she knew about before hand. Another dumped her twice and she then drunkenly stalked him (ie finding out where he was going on a night out then turning up, getting off with him and going back to his for sex, and yet she couldn't work out why he didn't call afterwards)

However, recently she's not had any problems and so I've basically not existed for her, she barely responds to texts or emails. However she had a huge go at me over a comment on her facebook when the timeline thing came in and she was asking people to look at her cover picture (she's very much LOOK AT ME!! LOOK AT ME!!) and as I'd not really bothered about paying attention to changes on Facebook, I asked "wouldn't people see it anyway?". But that was apparently being negative and she only wanted serious things on there. So she removed my comment.
However, someone else then put on a very clearly joke comment and rather than have a go at them, she joined in with the joking.

Fast forward to today. She's posted about a music festival she's going to. I joking asked if there was going to be any good bands, another person joined in the joke of mocking her taste in music. Cue another go at how negative I am and how she's had a really hard time this past year.

I responded by telling her exactly what I thought of her hypocritical ways of only wanting to talk to me when she wants something and how she isn't the only one who's had a hard time this year (I won't bore you with the crap year I've had, let's just say I've dragged myself back from being a stain on the front of a high-speed train) and the fact any time I've tried to talk to her about how I feel her response has been "Oh dear, well my day's been like this"

So, my question is have I over reacted or have I done the right thing by telling her off?

I would say you did the right thing in a reciprocal sort of way - she would undoubtedly do the same to you by the sound of it. Besides, if she's causing.. I'm tentative to say harm, but let's say difficulty to herself and others, then it sounds like a good thing to make her aware that she's doing that.

Sometimes people need a kick like that to realize that what they're doing is wrong. If no one calls them out, they don't know that what they're doing is bad or wrong.

weirdsoup:
So, my question is have I over reacted or have I done the right thing by telling her off?

I have better question : why do you care ?
You did what you felt was right back then. Case closed.
I always say that people who can't see past some simple misunderstandings or make big fuss over commentary/text message or something aren't worth any attention.

As long as you leave it as it stands in your post, I would say you're justified in your actions. If she responds back and you continue the dialogue, I may change my opinion. At this point you've said your peace so leave it be. She needs some sort of reality check, but it's most likely not going to be an epipheny based on your comments; nothing personal.

Was it perhaps the classiest move ever? Perhaps not. Does it make you a bad person? Not really. In the end, can you look yourself in the mirror and stand by your actions? That's what matters most.

It sounds like you're making something out of nothing. There is no drama here. It sounds like you don't really like each other that much and that your relationship means very little to her. She doesn't contact you unless she wants to rant = she doesn't actually like you or consider you close, and you're making more out of this than it is. My advice to you is to care less.

Eusebius:
It sounds like you're making something out of nothing. There is no drama here. It sounds like you don't really like each other that much and that your relationship means very little to her. She doesn't contact you unless she wants to rant = she doesn't actually like you or consider you close, and you're making more out of this than it is. My advice to you is to care less.

Exactly, couldn't of said it better.

You aren't a guru, you're her friend, and if she only wants to talk about herself, she ain't worth it.

 

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