It's gonna be so awkward.

So, to my extreme confusion I appear to have been invited to a wedding by a friend* of mine.
Now this puts me in a slightly awkward position 'cause I haven't been to a wedding since like never.
So fellow escapists, any tips on how should I act when I'm there? Dancing tips will also be much appreciated 'cause I'm absolutely awful at it.

* By a friend I mean a girl that I used to know six years ago and know we met again at this sort of catholic young people meeting thingy.

CAPTCHA: talk turkey

Get drunk and hit on the mother-in-laws.

Then you'll get un-invited to all future weddings. Problem solved. ;)

Well I'm 17 so the mother-in-laws thing is kind of strange.

Also this is going to be a party with no alcohol. And that's good cause I don't drink.

In future I would aprreciate more serious advices.

Set a table on fire while you ritually carve up a dead pig and shout things you'd read in a H.P. Lovecraft books.

Or you could be boring and act all normal and crap

Meh, I should've known escapist wasn't the right place for this kind of advice.

Thanks anyway I guess.

jadowity123:
Meh, I should've known escapist wasn't the right place for this kind of advice.

Thanks anyway I guess.

Yeah, it really was a bad idea.

How you should act: like a civilized human being.

Dancing: not a problem that can be fixed with tips. Dancing decently well requires practice, or at the very least a demonstration.

There are few forums in the world where you will get a serious answer(s) for this kind of question.

99% prefer being an ass-hat.

Can't give you advice as I've never really been to a wedding either, and am even 1 year younger than you...

I've been to three weddings although the two I've been were less formal/ traditional as they suppose to be.
All I can say is just be calm and relax. Enjoy the experience and also make sure you are wearing a nice and formal clothing (also make sure it's clean).

Also I can't help you with the dancing trip (like I said the wedding I've been to are not so formal).

Well I've been to one, and you're not really required to dance but then again I was too busy stuffing myself with food to pay attention to anything else, so yeah stuff yourself with as much food as you can, or you could just act normal and not make everybody think you're crazy like I did.

jadowity123:
Well I'm 17 so the mother-in-laws thing is kind of strange.

Also this is going to be a party with no alcohol. And that's good cause I don't drink.

In future I would aprreciate more serious advices.

Still, hit on them - age is no barrier for love.

If they don't serve alcohol, bring your own - hide it under your jacket or something. Once drunk, offer to people around you.

Sorry, I felt the need to. Now more seriously...well, a wedding is not that much different than any other formal party. Act decent and civilised. Try to make small talk with the people. If you can't, try to stick to your relatives or friends around there, although it's a good opportunity to make some new ones ("So...pretty boring wedding, eh?" - use that on anybody who seems like you. Or "Ever been to another wedding? I haven't" you get the idea). Don't forget to talk to the bride and groom and wish them happiness, long life and whatever else appropriate. If you're feeling low on fun, try stringing a longwinded wish and slip in some amusing things, say, wish them happiness, long life, lots of children, never to run out of popcorn, everlasting love and several others.

And that's really the major part. It's just a fancy party. It would be a problem if you're alone there - without your parents/relatives/friends, but you should be able to find somebody to talk to.

As for dancing, I doubt anybody can give you written tips that would work. Your profile doesn't say where you're from, so do you have a national dance of some sort? I suppose it will come up at the wedding. Often, in fact. Otherwise, are there types of music that come up more often? Most probably the slow sensual type but who knows, the newly-weds may prefer something more upbeat. usually, though, there is a DJ (or a band, but I'll cover the same under DJ) hired for weddings and those DJs know the usual music people prefer and try to mix it to suit the most people (not make misic mixes, just use different songs) - they might do a disco music, then some slower stuff, followed by some summer hit, followed by a national dance. That sort of stuff. At any rate, there is bound to be a genre/type of music that is most likely to come up, so getting to practice some of this would be useful. And by "practice", I mean just learn something basic - nobody really expects you to be the friggin' Riverdance or each of your moves to be honed to perfection and even the most casual of steps you take to leave people breathless. Look around at the wedding - there's going to be really few awesome dancers, most will just do some simple yet functional steps. I know people who can dance to one type of music all in all (and even then, it's something like "left, left, left, step forward, step backward, repeat", so nothing complex) and that is really enough.

jadowity123:

Also this is going to be a party with no alcohol.

No matter how many times I read this I still want to purge the heretics.

No alcohol?! What kind of Amish shindig is this...
Well normally you would at some point or another be offered crazy drunken monkey sex in the nearest coat closet, because ladies get loose when drunk and weddings make them extra emotional and desperate.

But since that isn't happening the best you can hope for is good food, the rest will just be polite nods, handshakes, introductions, and meaningless conversations noone should ever need to hear in their entire life.

My honest advice would be not to go. You're probably being invited to pad out the numbers and weddings that aren't yours are invariably shit. If you have your heart set on it, find a suit and ask your mum to show you how to dance. You could also just not dance. No one will care because it's not your wedding. The bride isn't even going to talk to you and you won't know anyone there.

Seriously, stay home and read a book.

I went to a wedding when I was like.. 13, once.
If you do end up going just act natural, seriously. Be polite and chat, it's nothing too odd.

Politely decline? Really, it shouldn't be this dramatic, especially for a 6-year lapse.

jadowity123:
Meh, I should've known escapist wasn't the right place for this kind of advice.

Thanks anyway I guess.

You can find decent advice if you have the patience.

I'd go. The reception always has fine food and drinks. No alcohol? No problem! If you feel that you need to drink for socializing, put on some cologne and carry a water-bottle filled with vodka. For dancing tips, look them up on Youtube or Google. For dressing, don't wear a tux. Only the Groom and other VIP's can wear tuxedos. Wear something formal, like a dress shirt with a vest, tie and dress pants. Dress shoes are recommended as well. Make sure you're colour-coordinated. You want to stand out if you're looking for women.

If you're a girl, I dunno. Most women at weddings I've been to wear sun-dresses if they aren't wearing casual wear. Just remember this: Never out-dress the Bride. You can look prettier than the other bridesmaids, just not her.

I went to a friends cousins wedding, got really (REALLY) drunk and almost passed out and danced like a fool, had a great time.

Weddings are easy:

Wear a nice suit, the smarter the better.
Find someone you are attracted to from amongst the crowd, and talk to them as often as you can about boring life things.
Ask them to dance.
Get their phone number.

Wedding sorted.

Weddings are perfect for meeting gfs/bfs!

I'mma hurl out another vote for "Don't go, your being invited as room meat" given that you hadn't seen each other for six years.

But if you decide to, just do what everyone else does at these things: Wear a nice suit in a non-garish colour (that isn't similar to the grooms), be polite and sociable to the other guests, and dance like a moron (because drunk or no, most people can't dance well either way).

If you never been to a wedding then this is your chance to experience what it will be like before it matters, even if you act like a complete tit then as least there's little to be lost but I wouldn't put this as high priority.

Still, even if you are "room meat" there's potentially more to gain rather than to lose. So I say; just go for teh lulz.

Weddings are like every other social event. Your invitation should give you a clue as to the formality of it. You dress smart, but don't go over the top. You don't have to dance, no one is making you and you're certainly not the centre of attention.
You just have to show up and be polite to the relatives and your friend will just be happy you went. Mostly the whole thing is quite boring, honestly, but it will be fine.

You should act like you've never acted before! (Unless you regularly act like a barbarian, what with the cutting pigs open while still alive with a sickle and threatening to destroy villagers, which would've been my suggestion).

The simplest solution is to just not go, especially since it seems like you don't really want to.

I have never been to a single wedding in my life, and I am trying to live my whole life without going to one.
So I also advise you to not go. Lol

No really, I think it not important for you to go because you don't even seem to be close friends which means they are padding up the number.

However, because it doesn't matter, it is a good practice wedding to learn the formalities in case you have to attend anoth one that matters in the future.
You are 17, so even if you make a few mistakes, people will laugh it off, ao all the more better.
Think of it as a nan learning experience, especially I'd there is no booze involved....

For the dancing, go to YouTube!!!

You really have nothing to lose by attending so don't listen to those who are telling you not to go.

Worst case scenario, you know absolutely no one (except for your friend) and have a great opportunity to meet new people. How do you this? Dress smart, be polite and civil and don't stress out.

You don't have to dance if you don't want to. You might just meet someone (or two) who will change your mind about it.

Really, just go there and try to have a good time. At the end of the night, at least you can say you've been to a wedding.

Frankly, I am perplexed at the lack of alcohol. I have the distinct honour of being best man at my best friend's wedding in the fall, I couldn't imagine doing most of my duties without at least 3-4 drinks down range.

Okay, I've already been to the wedding. Gotta admit it was quite nice and I actually danced so it's a succes. Anyway thanks for all the advice especially to FilipJPhry and DoPo, one day I hope I'll have the chance to repay you (although I doubt it, I'm pretty useless).

P.S. This whole no alcohol thingy was apparently some sort of joke wich I didn't get.

It's not that hard. Now after the wedding is over it is time to get nice and buzzed. Come on over to a nice spot, then plant yourself. of course the more drunk you get, the more you will want to talk. Let me tell you right now that you are probably not going to get laid. Dumbass stuff you see in the movies is not real life, so crush that fantasy. Basically some people might get lucky, but it's not that easy. Literally alot easier if you can find someone to talk to for the whole time. Of course like a lonely bridesmaid, or another dude that was dragged there. Of course that way you won't just be sitting there looking like a creepy drunk. Don't worry about it, things always seem worse in your head.

 

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