Depressing single person problems...

So I graduate high school in a week. Looking back it's been alright, but there has been something that has been bothering me this whole time...I am like the only person I know who has not had a girlfriend all through high school. Here's the thing though... I'm not the sort of person who settles. It's not like there was no one interested in me, but it's just been that no one in particular has been very interesting to me, and for those that I was interested it invariably resulted in painful rejection.

But the thing is...should I even be complaining? I mean I could have had a relationship if I had settled for less but chose not to. And everyone else always says to me that I'm always going to be single if I 'just wait for someone perfect'. And they always make it sound like I'm judgmental or don't give anyone a chance, but that's just not true. I know a lot of girls and I'm just not interested in any of them, I would get to know someone and maybe go on a few dates with her and just find I had no real interest.

Do I just have my standards set too high? Admittedly I do have rather high standards, but if I compromise that just to have a relationship I end up stuck with someone I don't actually feel anything for.

Really pains me to say this, but some people die alone. Yeah you can call it an emo comment or whatever else is going on in that rainbow brain head of yours where everything just works out. Can tell you right now that everybody on the planet settles. Almost all relationships start because of either booze, or they are like you and can't stand being lonely anymore. Reality of the situation is that some people just never get their chance, no matter how hard they try. Doesn't mean you won't have sex, or part time girlfriends, but eventually you will get older and realize what I said to be true.

Dude you're young; you're just now reaching adulthood. You have all the time in the world to find a girl. Women now out number men in academia so if you make your way there you're fucking set. If we say that most people don't even notice the opposite gender until about thirteen that means that you've only been looking for about five years, give or take. You only have about another fifty or so on this planet. There is absolutely no need to settle as long as your standards aren't ridiculous (only dating super model astrophysicists) you'll be completely fine.

Captcha: describe this brand with any word(s): Delta... but you didn't leave enough room for every single swear word in the English language.

Dude, you JUST graduated high school, you have lots of time. And honestly, if you really want to attract someone, while not necessarily forget bothering with relationships, but put less of a focus on it and more on your education and future career.

Alternatively, you could do the cliche hook up with someone in high school or college, get her pregnant, have to drop out to get a job to pay for everything, end up being trailer trash, etc., etc. And ultimately end up constantly looking at what COULD have been, as opposed to what SHOULD have been.

Education should hopefully lead towards a satisfying career, assuming you have an idea of what you want to do. Get successful in it, and while it might not mean lots of money, you should get decently rewarded with it. Then you have all the time in the world to find someone. Get comfortable with who you are, that confidence will attract women (the money wouldn't hurt either for traveling and such).

And you'd probably find more compatible people in college, university or your job field since chances are you'd associate with people with similar interests and such. High school is a mess of hormones and drama, and I think about the people I wanted to date in high school and where they are now, and really, only one of them would have been worth it.

Sir, you have very little to worry about. If you were NOT to compare yourself to somebody else, or other standards, do you think it's a problem?

Maybe, Maybe not.

Being single can most definately suck. But it's a time to really think about yourself. Many people can be in similar boats as you, I know I have. But are you comfortable with yourself? Do you know who YOU are? Are you cool with that person? Consider these things before considering sharing yourself with some one. That's one of the good things about being single - getting to know YOU.

This is not a problem. You are worrying a bit much, and as a teen getting out of high school that's an okay thing.

If you're going to college, you'll have many more opportunities with this situation, and only a few months away to boot!

I guess it depends what your standards are. Do you think any of them are a bit petty, or are they all really important to you?

Also, we don't really appear at our best all the time, so maybe some of the girls would be nice for you- take a chance on some people occasionally.

Contrary to what a lot of people want you to believe, you don't spontaneously burst into flames if you graduate high school without having ever been in a relationship. Plus, I'm of the opinion that high school relationships are overrated anyway.

Just focus on the future and don't worry too much about getting into a relationship. You have the rest of your life to find your perfect girl, so enjoy the ride and let life happen.

renegade7:
So I graduate high school in a week. Looking back it's been alright, but there has been something that has been bothering me this whole time...I am like the only person I know who has not had a girlfriend all through high school. Here's the thing though... I'm not the sort of person who settles. It's not like there was no one interested in me, but it's just been that no one in particular has been very interesting to me, and for those that I was interested it invariably resulted in painful rejection.

But the thing is...should I even be complaining? I mean I could have had a relationship if I had settled for less but chose not to. And everyone else always says to me that I'm always going to be single if I 'just wait for someone perfect'. And they always make it sound like I'm judgmental or don't give anyone a chance, but that's just not true. I know a lot of girls and I'm just not interested in any of them, I would get to know someone and maybe go on a few dates with her and just find I had no real interest.

Do I just have my standards set too high? Admittedly I do have rather high standards, but if I compromise that just to have a relationship I end up stuck with someone I don't actually feel anything for.

I don't see what you're so worried about. High School relationships are trash. Most of them end immediately after High school is over and the ones that do go on post-High School usually involve two crazy people.

Be happy you don't have to deal with the bullshit that comes with teenage romance. Sure, it's nice to feel like you aren't alone but those feelings inevitably boil away until you come to shocking realization that you are alone with another person who you have no real connection with.

Once you leave High-School your horizons will explode in ways you didn't think were possible. You will meet incredibly diverse and interesting people from places you've never heard of. That's when the game of Life starts to kick off in relation to romances.

That was my Philosophy, now here is my Advice: Get into College. Be with the people who want to be with you. Make yourself available and learn your preferences. It will be awkward at first and heartbreak will follow but it is only temporary. In the end you will grow, you will mature and, eventually, you will find happiness.

I agree on everything else people have said. Now to add on this, you'll never know who you really like until you start dating. If you're reasoning that you got some hi standards than you need to break down that barrier. Never have high standards. There's plenty of people at whatever standards, you're just in the wrong place to find them. Sometimes you got to have a few past girlfriends to understand who you like and who you work well with.

And everyone who has said you'll always be alone are probably the ones that are needy of being in a relationship. Though, it's possible that they see that you need a girlfriend. Also, I have no clue how many times you've tried.

But all in all, you're young and you're starting a new time of your life. Let's see what girls you'll find.

renegade7:
But the thing is...should I even be complaining? I mean I could have had a relationship if I had settled for less but chose not to. And everyone else always says to me that I'm always going to be single if I 'just wait for someone perfect'. And they always make it sound like I'm judgmental or don't give anyone a chance, but that's just not true. I know a lot of girls and I'm just not interested in any of them, I would get to know someone and maybe go on a few dates with her and just find I had no real interest.

As someone who has spent my entire adult life (I'm talking 16-22 years old) involved with some guy or other I can finally say... it's not worth it if you're not interested in them. Don't date people just because you can, or just because they're pretty, and definitely not just because you're lonely. It's just depressing and empty and hollow, and can end up less satisfying than just being friends with them.

Newly single now because my last boyfriend decided there's no 'spark' between us. This time I'm bleeding well going to stay single until I find someone I'm crazy about and who's crazy about me.

I'd say 'being single's not that bad' but... I don't actually know what it's like... o.o;

lisadagz:

I'd say 'being single's not that bad' but... I don't actually know what it's like... o.o;

It means there's only one toothbrush in your bathroom and that you need to work a bit harder if you want to find someone to confide in, really.

Anything else, it's what you make of it, really.

Here's the thing, if you don't have experience in dating you're gonna look like a fool when you do find someone you find interesting.

So all said, date someone your quasi-interested in, will it last a long time? Meh probably not but hey experience is experience.

How odd. You have the EXACT same scenario as me here.
As for dating women at my college, I don't like anyone there. At all. I'm at two sides to this.

On one hand, I think that focusing on myself is a good idea, as I don't think I would be very good boyfriend material. I'm not exactly caring for other people and those people at my college. Mainly because they are spoiled private college people who disregard everyone who isn't in their social circle.
As for standards, I also have quite high standards as well. But friends simply tell me to lower them. But then, I wouldn't really like them at all. Why have a relationship if I don't like them? It completely negates the point of a relationship.

On the other hand, it tears me apart... Seeing any and everyone with their respective partners. In my friend group outside of college, I seriously feel like not a third wheel, but a FIFTH wheel. With two in a relationship together and another in one as well. It doesn't help much. It's also why I don't hang out as much as I used to.

However, when I leave my current place, then I will find new people and the like. At least what I hope I leave the place I am currently at.

You're only just graduating high school, you have plenty of time. Don't feel that you ever have to compare or match yourself up to others. The majority of High school relationships aren't sublime or profound, give it some time and you'll meet some pretty interesting people later in life.

Goofguy:
You're only just graduating high school, you have plenty of time. Don't feel that you ever have to compare or match yourself up to others. The majority of High school relationships aren't sublime or profound, give it some time and you'll meet some pretty interesting people later in life.

very true....i blame movies and current society for pressuring people to have a girlfriend as soon as possible.

xshadowscreamx:

Goofguy:
You're only just graduating high school, you have plenty of time. Don't feel that you ever have to compare or match yourself up to others. The majority of High school relationships aren't sublime or profound, give it some time and you'll meet some pretty interesting people later in life.

very true....i blame movies and current society for pressuring people to have a girlfriend as soon as possible.

At least you are cognizant of that. If you're looking to date someone on the basis that it is expected of you, then you are doing it wrong.

I remember when I used to care about that.

Then I realized this:

xshadowscreamx:
very true....i blame movies and current society for pressuring people to have a girlfriend as soon as possible.

and worked my way towards not caring. Going on something like 4-5 years single now and I only wish it had been longer, i'd have a lot more money and a lot fewer regrets.

do you still love her?

 

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