So, my girlfriend and I split up. It was amicable, and we're still close friends.
But when I look back at it, something feels wrong about it. Not in the kind of "I shouldn't have broken up with her" kind of way, but I dunno, something feels off about the whole thing and I can't put my finger on it.
My reason for breaking up with her was really that I felt uncomfortable around some of her friends, and that neither of us wanted to make a step forward to be more close. We were essentially doing the same stuff we did when we were just friends, but more often and just us. But the only reason I feel odd about it now Is that she had nothing to do with why we broke up, it was the impact of other people on us that made me uncomfortable, Most notably a comment her dad made about me being bi (Don't ask because I'm not saying) and the general disapproval her friends had for me Either because of my appearance or my nerdiness.
Basically, I want to know that I did the right thing. I can't say one way or another, but I've got a knot in my stomach over the whole thing. so, yeah, thoughts?
For me, I had a friend who I got along very well with, we were pushed into dating each other and we just weren't having fun like we used to, we broke up and we are back to being great friends again, I always saw her as a friend anyway so the break-up actually felt right.
To be honest, you should have just talked with her about it, you don't HAVE to hang out with her friends, do you?
If you care about her you shouldn't let social pressures affect you. It seems ridiculous to throw away an opportunity to be happy based on the opinions of a few judgemental friends and a bigoted father. It's ultimately none of their business. That said, if you are happy just being friends, don't force yourself into an awkward relationship.
No one can tell you if you did the right thing or not. It is down to you. But why you split up doesn't really matter if you are both satisfied that you did so. It just means that is wasn't right for you to be together, whatever the reasons were. Don't dwell on it, just be happy it's all amicable and move on.
After every break-up there is always a weird feeling. It's hard to describe but it is the end of something and i think it is just the pain of losing someone or moving on from what you had. Maybe you two weren't meant for each other and if it was uncomfortable now it probably wasn't going to get better. Relationships are meant to be unreal at the start and some of the best moments of your life.
You will find a new person one whom you will feel comfortable around and you will be more than friends. The best thing is to try and move on and not dwell on it (I know easier said than done). Look forward to that new person you will meet. :)
Well, that kind of sucks.
Still, pardon me for assuming, but I'm guessing that if a few people's bad opinions is enough to get you two to break up, you weren't exactly head-over-heels?
I'd just try and be normal again, be friends. If in a few months time you are still feeling like you made a mistake, maybe try again.
Unfortunately no one can tell you, you did the right thing. That is something you have to decide for yourself. However, I completely agree with Phasmal: if you were willing to break up with her over a few minor problems, you probably weren't into her in the first place.
I am curious, why aren't her friends a problem when you're just friends? You mentioned while you were dating you did more things by yourselves, so wouldn't you be spending less time around her friends than when you were just friends?
Every relationship is going to face adversity. You cannot run at the first sign of trouble or you'll never end up with anyone. I am curious though, what were these friends doing that made you uncomfortable? Was it intentional on their part, or was the problem with you? Did you try to talk to your ex-girlfriend about it to see what she thought? Also, was the comment made by her father a once off thing, or has he constantly made remarks about your sexuality? Did his comments have an effect on your girlfriend? Did she start to believe you were bisexual because of her father?
However, and this is probably the most important thing. You admitted you had no desire of taking the relationship further her her. You were content with just doing the same things you did as friends. It sounds like you guys had more problems than just her friends.